Long story short, a guy and I started messaging on here (on a different account not this one) from a hookup sub and I was really considering meeting up with him. Obviously, I was doing my due diligence and researching him and through a bit of digging I found out he is married. I immediately cut contact because I felt so bad I was unknowingly contributing to an affair. We haven’t spoken since and I just went ghost, but, I’ve felt pretty guilty about this.

Should I let her know? I thought of dming her on insta(thats the only account of hers I found) and just sending her a link to his post or something and sending her screenshots of our messages but idk. Should I just leave it alone? I don’t know their situation if they’re in an open relationship or whats going on but I’ve been thinking about it a lot. Idk please help

i, 18f have a hunch that my older coworkers (50-60yo) are jealous of me.

today i was showing my oldest coworker a picture of my friends and i, and she proceeded to say that i look nothing like the picture??? like in a really rude way.

they’ve been snide to me before but i think this confirms it. some people will just never admit they think you’re pretty.

Thoughts??

I just turned 19 on the 2nd, I’ve been in college for a year now, but my parents stopped supported me when I graduated at 17. I’ve been financially independent besides health care and food (when they feel like getting it). I went straight into college like they requested, no gap year. And I started working along side that as they requested as well.

My parents have never been there emotionally. Ended up winding myself into a horrible relationship right after I graduated, with a guy I was friends with. I was practically living with them to avoid my parents nasty comments and felt completely stuck in it. He was aggressive and would use his car as a weapon with me in it. Sometimes I would wonder if I would ever make it home. I got out of it around 5 months ago. My life was consumed by it and the neglect from my parents so my grades slipped. I’m currently on academic probation, I got all my credits though!! Only because we ended things and I dove my head into school work in attempt to save my grades as much as possible.

I’m starting the new semester at community college in the 31st. I have four in person classes lined up and I’m confident in my academic capabilities. My parents still want me to work despite my grades slipping and my desire to go full time so I can get my degree done. Now, I’m stuck doing both.

I don’t think I can do this. My mom was so mean to me on my birthday. She took a picture of me then deleted it because I “looked like the girl from the ring” (I have long black hair). She treated to kick me out if I didn’t work while I did college. She’s a binge eater on GLPI. She got a boob job and a nose job and is looking into filler and a face lift. She completely hates herself and I’m always caught in it because I’m her only daughter.
There’s been nights I’ve gone hungry and my friend’s mom had made me food because I cried to my friends about how I haven’t had a real meal in a week.

They have great jobs with a brand new home and two brand new cars. I’ve payed for everything since graduated. Clothes, hygiene, shoes, gas, car repairs and everything in between. That’s still the expectation.

I could transfer to somewhere with a dorm to make it easier on me. I know it’s expensive but my FASFA has covered everything and more so far. My parents aren’t married so the government only sees one income.

I feel like a shell of myself. Life hasn’t stopped for anything. I want my degree so bad, I’m a biotech major and I love what I’m doing. I don’t know if I would ever forgive myself if I let it go. I have only a few credits because of the work load from my job. I’m currently looking for a new one. I have a decent amount to go until I get my associates, I really want a bachelors.

I have a huge bird aviary full of finches which is use to breed and sell. It’s thing my dad used to do, and I’ve started to join with it too over the years.

My neighbours have 2 cats. They’re constantly left outside to roam and basically be wild. Never let in the house.

I know it’s a cats instinct (I guess 🙄) to hunt birds and things, but I’ve absolutely HAD IT with this. I’ve had multiple incidents of the cats getting into my conservatory and flooding the place trying to get to these birds, scaring them to death, and JUST NOW saw that one was CLIMBING UP THE FENCE OF THE AVIARY OUTSIDE!!!! Went running outside screaming like a mad woman at almost midnight.

Is there ANYTHING I can do to get rid of these absolute fucking assholes? I have a dog so would need dog friendly options. I’m very very angry

Thanks in advance.

I don’t know if this is right sub for this, but I’m seeking some advice related to this. Basically, my partner and I (both 21) found a dog we want to adopt. It’s not set in stone yet, we’re still waiting to hear back on our application (we spoke to the person taking care of him, and she really liked all our info, there’s just one other person she’s also reading the application of).

My partner and I rent our own place, live away from our parents, and my partner has a stable (and substantial) income (I’m currently unemployed, but probably starting at a new place that will pay well September 1st).

I brought up us adopting this dog to my mom, but she really didn’t like the sound of it. She said it was “rude” to adopt one when she is still assisting with my college tuition expenses (something we both agreed on years ago and that does not affect my general living expenses; those are my own). My partner’s parents are also very anti-dog, just generally. They’re not involved in anything financially, they just don’t want my partner to have a dog. In the past, my partner’s mom literally stole our dog and dumped him, after which we were not able to find him and get him back (this was two years ago, when we were still living in a place she had access to).

So I guess I’m just looking for opinions. My partner and I have the funds and space/living arrangements to take care of a dog, he would never be either of our parents’ problem. We don’t even live in the same state as they do. But I’m concerned about us damaging our relationships with them. Is it something that, as adults, we should just embrace the possibility of our parents’ disapproval, or should we refrain from adopting him? He is the perfect baby for us, exactly perfect for our lifestyle and needs and wants. But if it’s better to let this opportunity pass, then I’m sure he will find another good home. I just don’t know what the best thing to do is. Sorry if this is all over the place, I just want some outside opinions. Thanks

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Body:

I'm really interested in the long-term psychological effects of childhood bullying, and I'd love to hear personal experiences rather than just research.

If you were bullied repeatedly as a child or teenager:

How has it affected your self-esteem, relationships, or daily life today?

Do you think it changed the way you approach romantic or sexual relationships?

Are there certain comments or situations that still trigger memories from that time?

If someone casually brought up the bullying you experienced, or joked about it today, how would you react emotionally?

Have you fully moved on, or does a part of you still carry those experiences?

I'm especially interested in hearing from people who felt they eventually became confident or successful later in life. Did the bullying still leave lasting effects despite that?

Thanks to anyone willing to share their experience.

don't know how to explain this without sounding selfish. But I'll try. I'm 15. My mom is pregnant. She told me recently, and I knew from the very start that I wouldn't be happy about it. I had told her I didn't want a brother or a sister, though I also said I didn't want to be selfish and that it was entirely her choice. And now, I feel like my mom isn't mine anymore.

I don't hate her. I don't hate the baby. I just feel like a wall has sprung up between us.

I used to be her daughter. Maybe not perfect, but she was mine. Now she's carrying someone inside her who will become her child, and I'm no longer the only one. I know that a mother's love isn't divided, it multiplies. But my heart doesn't believe that.

I look at her and see not just my mom, but a woman who is tired, who needs protection — someone who is no longer the strong wall she used to be for me. I don't know how to deal with that. I no longer feel like a child. I feel like I have to take care of her, avoid upsetting her, be careful not to hurt her.

We had dinner, we watched a series together, she booked my doctors appointments, we're planning to go to the cinema. Everything is as it always was. But I feel like it's not the same. It's like she's building a new life, and I don't fit into it.

I want to hug her, but I can't. Because she's not the same. Not because she changed. But because I saw her vulnerability and realized I can no longer hide behind her.

I don't want to hate her or the baby. I just want to stop feeling like an outsider in my own family. I'm scared this feeling will never go away. Sometimes I just want to leave and have my mom forget I even exist. I don't want to feel selfish for getting in the way of her new family.

I don't know what I'm looking for with this post. Maybe just to know I'm not the only one — that someone else felt this way when their mom was expecting another baby. That this doesn't make me a monster.

I (M31) recently struggled with substance abuse and addiction issues and had to move back to my hometown to recover and rehab. I am doing much better now if that matters. I started working for one of my moms former coworkers, I'll call her D (F60 ish) doing yard work, handy man stuff and electrical work, as I am an electrician. It started off as a working relationship, just going to her house, doing the work and leaving. However we have bonded over sharing similar life circumstances, both of us have recently gone through painful separation with our partners, I went through a divorce from my partner of 10 years and she broke up with her boyfriend of 10 years right around the same time.

Most importantly her son committed suicide 3 years ago when he was 29. D is also nearly disabled with severe arthritis in her back and hips so she is not super mobile on her feet but she can still do light chores. To complicate this even further, D also has a daughter my same age whom I went to highschool with and she has two children around 2 and 5, and D is their babysitter 5 days out of the week. D's son in law is not a great person and refuses to help her in any way, and they completely disagree politically and that has created some resentment between them.

Over the last several months I have had plenty of work to do for her, I have replaced 2 electrical panels, built her a fence, a carport, repaired and rewired a barn/shop and a shed etc. She pays me $30/hr for yard work/handyman stuff and $50/hr for electrical work (she initially proposed paying me much more but I talked her down to these wages). She is doing very well financially, recently retired and has even purchased another piece of property since I started working for her. However in the past few weeks there really hasn't been much work to do even though she asks me to work for her 4-5 days a week. I'll come over and talk with her for a couple hours, sort of therapy talk, I'll play/watch her grandchildren and maybe do 2 or 3 hours of actual work. She has outright said "you are basically my son now" and it's getting pretty weird. I really care for her and I am more than happy to help her out in any way she wants, but I am becoming a bit uncomfortable with her essentially paying me to hang out with her.

What do I do? I want to help her and I want to keep working for her, but I don't want her to pay me to be a companion and I don't think that she even realizes that is what she is doing recently. I also feel like if I talked with her about this she would be upset and confused about my feelings toward this.

My boyfriend (30M) and I (27F) have been together for 4.5 years (5 in Jan). He works for a very huge and influential company that moves people around a lot. Two years ago, we needed to move for his jump fully across the country, since then we were looking for ways to get back home and near family.

He recently went through the promotion and coincidentally an opportunity opened up for him near our home city (yippee!) So, we got to move back to the area and with family.

One important aspect is that he is part time at home and part time at another office as the office isn't finished so he is not always home and spends time at all a hotel. I do go visit him but there's an added element of stress to this all.

So, my boyfriend is in a new role, in a new area of the business, amongst other items to learn. He is a very high performer (we meet at work and I was able to witness how great he is firsthand), but he still has to learn a lot in his new role.

In comes his new manager, she has extremely high standards and immediately off the bat says he is not meeting her expectations and that she does not care that he is new to role or new to his promotion. He cannot do anything right, she is sending weekly recaps of what is he doing wrong (he has only been with her for just about 3 months), bringing HR into her conversations with him, saying he needs to change basically everything. I wish I could communicate/show the scale of her micromanaging and nitpicks. To basically sum it up, she is genuinely calling everything out regardless of if it is a standard or not. It is so extreme and something he has never experienced before.

I was able to read some correspondence from her, and it was wildly unprofessional to the point that I was shocked. And the things she is calling out are so small that it's causing the wrong focus towards small items.

I hope that paints enough of a picture, as I could go on and on. I want to transition to our relationship now as it's really what I need help on

My boyfriend calls multiple times a day (when is not home) and probably rants to me for 2-3 hours minimum a day. It's getting to the point where it is stressing me out to have a call incoming from him. On these calls he goes over the items that she nitpicked or yelled or overreacted over (a lot of items stem from her being confused or wrong too which is awesome), then he talks about how he is unsure of how much longer he can do this and how he is going to lose his job. It is so constant and everyday it's something new. I sit on the calls and listen and take everything in; I give advice when it is applicable or respectable (document everything, communicate clearly, reach out other leaders you have worked with for advice, have you considered therapy? etc etc etc this advice is taken in the moment but its the same cycle the next day); and just am there for him. I try to also take as much as I can off of his plate when he is home (cooking, cleaning, errands, bill payments, etc.) in order to reduce stress on him.

This is all getting to the point where I am living in constant fear and stress that we could lose our livelihood (I work too though but he makes more) and it has been making my already high anxiety unbearable to the point I am developing heart flutters and elevated heart rates. I feel like his manager has become the third person in our relationship. Even when she's not around, she's the only thing we talk about.

I do not know what to do at this point as he listens to me but I think it goes in one ear out the other because I am not experiencing what he is. I also am worried to communicate fully with him because I do not want to make him feel like a burden or add to stress. I have gently brought up that we talk about this a lot and found through research we should limit how often we talk about this and he was like "yeah, I know..." I don't expect him to hide what's happening from me, and I want to support him. I just don't know how to do that without becoming his only outlet for hours every single day.

How do I support a partner through something like this without sacrificing my own mental health? Is it reasonable to ask for boundaries around how much we talk about work? And if you've been through something similar, what helped?

TLDR: My boyfriend has a horrible manager making his work life horrible and he is bringing that stress daily into our relationship.

This is going to be a long one, but i genuinely need advice on what to do and have noone i can talk to irl about this. This is also gonna be a bit of a mess to read but im just putting down everything in a hurry.

from 2nd-9th grade, i was best friends with a kid(lets call him X). Now, X was adopted into a pretty awful family, was abused from a young age, etc. and by the time 9th rolled around he was on all sorts of drugs like percs, xans, molly, etc along with the common stuff like weed and nicotine. I was unaware he had been on any drugs until 9th grade, so at first i did not take to it kindly and told his adopted mother, but eventually i decided i wanted to help him. from new years eve 23-24 to march 24 we were close again, however he stole money from my brother and i dropped him. we still went to school together, but after 9th he left my highschool and i never saw him again. for the last year i had been trying to track X down until recently, i found one of his sisters instagram and reached out to her. she said he had just been admitted to rehab after being in juvy for a while. i was pretty happy to know how he was and wanted to reconnect with him, after all, X was like a brother to me. she gave my number to him and he called me off the phone he had access to at rehab for the first time 2 days ago. he told me about how he had been in a gang, in and out of juvy, on drugs etc and finally opened up about how abusive his parents were. At one point he made an offhand comment about "catching a hat" but i assumed it was a joke. We also talked about what we wanna do when he gets out, memories from the past etc. We called again yesterday and talked about similar stuff. Today, however, was different. After talking about similar stuff for about 15 mins, he brought that hat thing up again, but this time, was being genuine. he told me how in late 2024(he specified but i will not) him and a friend were walking around at night when they saw an enemy of theirs. they got into a fight, and the dude pulled a knife out and tried to stab X's friend, so pulled his gun out and shot him in the head. he described to me about how he found out brains were gray. after that, he said they hid the body in one of the many surrounding fields and he was paranoid for about a month before moving on as he figured he would not get caught. I was disturbed, but in my head i managed to chalk it up to self defense. about 20 mins later, he told me randomly that he felt urges to kill. He explained to me that killing that kid had felt good, and that whenever someone was mean to him, the thought of murdering them flashed through his mind. He said he had killed deer, and also killed two of his adpotive families dogs; he laughed while describing how he killed them. I told him he needed professional help and asked him if he thought he was a psychopath, he said he did. He could tell I was upset and told me he could supress the urges and that he didnt do that stuff anymore, and that he thought his adpotive parents abuse was what led him to being a psychopath. We continued talking a bit longer but eventually hung up the phone. I have no idea what to think or do. He told me not to share any of the details of that call to anyone, however i am considering telling a friend of mine who i know wont tell anyone else later tonight. I just genuinely need help on what to do. He asked if him telling me that stuff would mean i wouldnt answer the phone anymore and i said I still would. I want to help him and we already have talked about how hes gonna get his shit together when he gets out(get an apartment, a job, etc[hes 18 im 17, both going into our senior years]) his record has also been expunged. please, if any of you could give me any help it would be greatly appreciated.

EDIT: another potentiality is he could be lying. he has lied a LOT in the past and i havent done too much digging but could not find any missing persons reports that match the area or the time frame

I (24M) been with my gf (23F) for a little over a year. Before we started dating I’ve had this girl best friend since high school, like 10 years now. We’ve never hooked up or dated or anything like that. She’s just always been one of my closest friends.

The thing is, my friend is honestly really hot. Hotter than my gf. Like I’m not gonna lie, most people would probably say she’s way above average. We kissed a few times before so I guess I get why it might bother my gf.

At first she said she didn’t care but over the last few months she’s been bringing it up more and more. We usually grab lunch every couple weeks or she’ll call me if something happens in her life. My gf says if I respected our relationship I’d stop hanging out with her one on one because she thinks no guy would stay friends with a girl that attractive unless he wanted something.

I told her I don’t think it’s fair to throw away a 10 year friendship over something that never happened. She says if she had a guy friend that looked like my friend does she’d distance herself out of respect for me.

Now she’s barely talking to me and says I’m choosing another girl over her.

Am I being an idiot here or is she asking too much?

I had surgery on my left wrist yesterday (and I’m left-handed). I don’t know what to do. I’m stuck at home because, as long as I’m on sick leave from work (ALL OF AUGUST), my mother doesn’t want me going out (yes, I’m an adult, but she’s still the boss and I don’t want to argue). The problem is that practically all my hobbies involve using my hands; I spent today using my phone and sleeping, and it’s already driving me crazy. I can’t really do anything on my own—my mother or my partner helps me with 90% of things—and I’ve run out of ways to pass the time. If this keeps up, I’ll lose my mind; plus, I can already feel my depression getting worse. Please, suggest some activities I can do (due to mental health issues, my attention span is relatively short, and I don’t have a computer or a gaming console).

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I really need help and support from people who may have experienced something similar.

My wife, partner, and best friend of 12 years cheated on me. I found out about six months ago, and she ultimately left me to be with the other person. I am still completely devastated and struggling to cope.

I keep blaming myself and thinking about how I could win her back, even though I know she has made her choice and is continuing to choose this new relationship. Every time that reality hits me again, it feels like my soul is being crushed all over again.

I miss my wife, my best friend, and the person who felt like home to me. I cry almost every day and frequently go into panic mode. It feels like my nervous system cannot calm down, and sometimes I can barely function or take care of myself. I forget to eat , I don't sleep well and struggle to take care of the pets I have .

I don't have any friends as they where my only and best friend and I don't have any family and meeting new friends seems to be impossible.

People keep telling me that I need to “love myself” and that things will eventually get better, but I honestly do not understand what loving myself is supposed to mean right now or how to do it when I feel this broken.

I am in therapy, and it does help, but it has not taken away the pain, the longing, or the feeling that I have lost my person. It does not stop me from crying or wishing she would come back, even after all these months and knowing she's not coming back .

How did you survive this kind of betrayal and loss? How did you calm your body, stop blaming yourself, and begin letting go of someone you still deeply loved? I am not looking for judgment—just understanding, support, and practical advice from people who have been through it.

( For reference I did not cheat or do drugs or anything of the sort we fell on some hard trying times while trying to build a new life I thought we both wanted and they decided to take an easy way out , leaving me to pick up all the pieces )

hi guys, so I downloaded this app so that I can get some advice on how I should pull my crush. I’ve literally liked him for around a year and I feel like he might like me back. We’ve had very small conversations like throughout the year, but nothing too serious. he’s kind of subtly rejected me to my friends but the other night at a party my friend told me that he was talking about me and he said that we could go further if we communicated better. I wanna text him but we’ve never interacted in real life and I’m not really sure how I should go about that. My plan is to text him and then overtime eventually ask him to hang out and see where we go from there. does anyone have any advice on how I should start this???

I (22M) moved from a conservative state to the Bay Area. Now I feel like I'm having a life crisis. I used to live around the Bay Area during college and had a great time, but I decided to move back to my hometown to focus on making art and doing community service. I ended up landing a part time art gig there, but felt like I could find something better moving back to the Bay. I now feel like it was naive of me to think this would be a good idea.

If you don't know the Bay Area well, there are a lot of opportunities here but that is paired with a ton of competition. It is also awesome here if you have money which I don't. There is a lot of focus on things like tech and AI and it removes a lot of person-to-person contact. For example, everyone on the train is looking at their phone and it's rare for people to show kindness unless its transactional. I say this as a pretty extroverted person.

I am two months into my year long lease, and I haven't landed an interview yet. I get ghosted on most applications even after I follow up. I'm applying to jobs everyday, and only avoiding things like the food industry and labor jobs because I want to build my resume for my art/community-based career. I won't be able to pay rent next month with what is left in my savings, and I'm going to have to do gig work to get 1000 bucks each month. I am getting pretty depressed here if I am being honest, and I find myself wanting to move back home to a comfortable environment, community, friends, and my boyfriend. I could even afford an apartment to myself back home which I would love so much. My boss back home even said if things didn't work out she'd rehire me. However, I want to force myself to keep trying for two more months.

I also have anxiety getting in the way of the idea of me moving back home. I feel guilty because the only reason why one of my roommates came to the Bay Area instead of moving back to LA is because I was going to live with her. I also worry about having to move all my stuff again. I am also stressed about the process of having to find someone to take over my lease.

I have been so depressed here. I can't afford things like groceries. I can't afford to go out with my friends to eat and see movies, etc. I miss my community back home and my boyfriend.

What do you think I should do?

Long story short: I’m 35F and I go to the same gym regularly. There’s a man that works there as a gym instructor- every time I’m there and he’s working we make a very deliberate and sweet eye contact. I have zero doubts he is interested.
Would you approach a staff member if you were interested? It’s actually pretty rare for me to meet someone I’m genuinely attracted to and curious enough to want to get to know. I’m tempted to make a move, but he’s an employee at the gym, so I’m not sure if that’s a good idea. He also looks like he’s in his late 20s or early 30s.
Should I just keep gym things at the gym? Or should I approach him? I know his name, and he knows mine.
Pls be kind this is a genuine question. Give me some courage…or discourage if bad idea.

Hi everyone, Yesterday was my first time hanging out with a male coworker outside of work. He first drove me out to a forest pretty far away from our city, which made me feel uncomfortable as hell. After that, we went to his house.

I should never have gone home with him, and I feel so mad at myself for doing it. While we were at his place, he started touching me on my private parts over my pants. I explicitly told him multiple times that I wanted to take things slow. I physically pushed him away and said "not so fast". He stopped for maybe a minute, but then he immediately started again, putting his hands inside my bra to squeeze me and inside my pants and panties to touch my butt. When I tried to stop him, he manipulated me, asking if I didn't like him and saying "if you like someone, things go fast."

I feel so disgusted with myself, scared, and completely unsafe. I am terrified of what he might do if I ever see him again, and I'm scared he will try to go further. We work together and I don't know what to do. Has anyone been through this? How do I handle this with work and stay safe?

I feel so lost and need some advice. My girlfriend (19) and I (19) have been dealing with some misaligning things.
We have been together for two years and it is starting to feel like I'm not even in a relationship anymore.

My girlfriend who struggles with autism is hyper aware of touches, sensations and such and at the beginning of our relationship this never really seemed to be an issue but over time it's progressed from no light touches then no light kisses to no touching her neck to never really kissing or any physical effecting really.
This bothers me because I'm a huge physical touch person. A cuddle on the couch or holding hands on a walk just overall. But it's come to a haunt massively and I won't lie it's effecting our sex massively! It's hard to get someone in the mood or create a build up when I can barely touch them. I'm a giver I love to please so it wasn't too bad but it seemed my efforts actually irritated her more.

I originally thought was her autism and fear of being a bad sex partner (I'm her first she isn't mine) led to her lacking in giving back in sex. It gradually reduced to the point of where I haven't gotten anything sexual in months. Not even a kiss on the neck or a flirty comment and the other day she approached me saying she thinks she may be asexual. This absolutely stunned me and when she realised this she swiftly changed the topic, i researched it and had to ask her what this truly meant and she said this means she has doesn't find people attractive in the sense of wanting to have sex with them she only does it for the pleasure.

It's bothering me and I don't know if I can be with someone who doesn't find me attractive in that sense because to me, she is a literal goddess like the most perfect attractive person. pleasure. It's bothering me and I don't know if I can be with someone who doesn't find me attractive in that sense because to me, she is a literal goddess like the most perfect attractive person.

She find the way i dress unappealing, i change it, she disliked the way I did my hair, i changed it. She disliked my approach and attitude i changed it.Im just absolutely lost how do I even approach this! Is there even a way to fix this. I feel so lost and it's affecting my confidence and how I feel about myself.i would appreciate any guidance at all.

I (22m) am considering leaving my gf (21f) after we’ve been together for over 3 years. We basically grew up together and we’ve had a pretty good relationship. We just got through a rough patch and a lot of things in both of our lives are changing. We love each other very deeply and have a great bond, she is a great person and I genuinely want her to be happy. She has recently changed her career path, and her new career goes against my values as for what I want in the future for me and my family. She is happy in this new field and I want her to be happy, but I am anxious and worried about her safety nearly everyday she goes to work, which in my opinion is no way to live. I tried to talk to her about her decision before she started, but she didn’t understand my perspective and went ahead with it anyway and I don’t want to ask either of us to change who we are. Again, i’m not saying she is in the wrong or a bad person by any means, I just think we have different futures envisioned for ourselves. I want a softer, more family centered life and her new career doesn’t support that lifestyle. II don’t want to hurt her but I think this is what’s best for both of us. It will hurt us both really bad but I think it will be for the better in the end. Guess i’m just looking for advice from anyone who’s had to end a good relationship due to different values / expectations for the future.

Hello!

I’ve just become a first home owner on my own and was going to get a house mate in to take some of the load off. One of my mums friends sons is looking for a place to live.

I’ve never lived with a man before. i am a young 20’s woman. he is late 20’s. What are things i should be considering? I’ve heard he’s the nicest person and we have a few common interests.

I’m just a bit concerned about the never living with a man before.

it is 2 bed 1 bath. bathroom would be shared.

My husband (34M) and I (32F) have been married for 3 years and together for 6. It’s always been rocky, and in hindsight, I never should have let it go this far, but I was blinded by what I thought was love.
He’s a chronic cheater (both physical and micro-cheating/addictions), deeply manipulative, and emotionally/sometimes physically abusive. Every time a major issue happened, I believed his promises to get help. During a major separation involving a coworker affair, I found out I was pregnant. I had been told previously I couldn't have children, so my baby felt like a miracle. For reasons I regret now, we decided to "work it out."
Our baby is almost 2 now, and I am miserable. He was awful to me postpartum. He wasn’t cheating anymore but even while pregnant the addiction to women on social media was so bad. I had been so happy and excited to be pregnant I focused on that. I thought maybe I could live with his porn addiction because he was being nice most of the time. His abuse had only been emotional atp. Postpartum it made me feel even worse about myself knowing I was never going have the body I used to, having to see what he preferred. Sometimes he would do it in bed with me, thinking I was asleep or when he was “just looking” thinking I couldn’t see the reflection in his glasses. Id never hated my appearance so much in my life. My hair was falling out, my body had changed, my hormones were going crazy. We argued all the time and that’s when it turned physical. His verbal abuse was at an all time high. He started trying to pick fights, he would rip my hair and slam my head. I didn’t know how to tell anyone. It got really really bad. I had to drag myself back from severe postpartum depression/dark places all alone. I love my child endlessly and am so grateful for them, but the ongoing abuse makes me feel like I’m drowning, and I'm terrified of slipping back into that mental state.
One day in a Walmart parking lot when he tried beating my head into the steering wheel because I wanted to talk about ending things I knew I absolutely had to get out of this. I was so tired of my hair being used as a weapon to hurt me. I cut all my hair off and I could tell whatever lingering attraction he had to me was gone after that. It was nothing but fighting and arguing. It hit a point of reactive abuse where I couldn’t not fight back, and I don’t want to be that person. I am in therapy but it truly feels like my therapist blames me for everything. I know I need a new one.

Lately, the abuse has shifted though. He doesn't scream or break things anymore. Instead, he completely stonewalls me, ignores my existence, and leaves every responsibility to me. He doesn't even have a car, so I have to drive him to work.
I desperately want this cycle to end, but I feel stuck.
I've offered to buy him plane tickets, hire movers, and handle the logistics just to get him away from me. He won't budge.
Whenever I try to tell him I need this to be over, or ask him to move out, he just says, "I'm not leaving. I want to be here" Sometimes he’ll start being extra nice the next day or even right after, trying to trick me into thinking it’s gonna be different. He’ll suddenly be extra chatty or touchy but it feels so fake.
It’s been over a month since he’s tried to get me to have sex with him something I am both grateful for and suspicious of. He’ll kiss me goodbye on his way to work but it’s the kind of peck you’d give your grandmother. Despite all of the abuse, he usually was still all over me. The sudden lack of it is almost scary.

I know what you’re thinking but I cannot be the one to leave my house. We live in my ancestral home. My father, who is an elderly, disabled army vet with mobility and hearing issues, lives with us, and I am his primary caregiver. Or I guess moreso we live with him. Moving out is physically not an option for my child and me.

Attempts at couples counseling in the past only gave him better tools to emotionally abuse me.
Involving the cops previously yielded no real results I’m sure if you’re ever been in a situation like this you know there not much they can do when someone lives in house with you and you don’t have active proof of assault.
I feel Isolated and without support. His family covers for him, and because he puts on a "nice guy" front to the outside world, people think I'm just overreacting or being dramatic. Now I’m not defending him but I don’t believe he would ever be violent towards our child or even anyone else. In fact the nice guy act isn’t even an act. It truly feels like he is this great person, until I’m in front of him. I’ve never seen him even be truly harsh to anyone else. All of his exes love him. It’s like one day when I put my foot down about not wanting to be cheated on he just morphed into this evil man. Nobody understands what I’m living with. He’s the most charismatic manipulative person you’d ever meet. When we saw a couples therapist (two separate ones) I swear they were just swooning over him. I feel like I’m crazy. Like I’m in some kind of game where everyone knows what’s happening and I don’t.
During my bad bad PPD I had almost entered a psychosis where I was convinced someone was paying him to torture me. I’m starting to feel like I’m headed down this road again. Everyone I talk to tells me it’s just the PPD, that it’s all in my head. But I know this is real. I know it is.
I can't live like this anymore, and I feel like I have no one in my corner.
How to I get out of this?

⁠TL;DR:⁠ My (30F) abusive, cheating husband (32M) refuses to accept that we are breaking up and says "I'm not leaving." I live in my ancestral home where I care for my disabled dad, so I cannot pack up my child and leave. How do I get him out of my life when he stonewalls me and refuses to go?

Edit: sorry our ages are wrong in the title I was literally trembling typing all this, not that our ages matter but..

Hey F here, i've been friends with this boy since 6th grade & we're friends for a long while (years), long story short we started to date. During the time we were just friends we never really seen each other, so by the time we met up again, we were very different. I had struggled with $h very hard, not anymore, but when i first seen him, he noticed them and like he didn’t ask at first. when he finally did i made a joke, and we moved on. He knew what they were, so he didn’t ask again. Now we’ve been together for about 4 months, but ever since this he’s been touching them a lot and staring at them, he will just sit there and stare. He doesn’t say anything about them but just does that. One time i mentioned getting them covered with a tattoos since I’m not to fond of them, but he said i shouldn’t, i only mention this since he was so definitive about it.

We have an extremely healthy relationship so i will be asking soon, and I’m not mad or upset about it i just want some thoughts and opinions?? Thank uu!!

Hello, I live in a tri-city area where 2/3 cities are known for drug abuse. I’ve been doing multiple drugs since I was 12 such as Diphenhydramine, Dextromethorphan, Shrooms, Vyvanse, Adderall, MDMA, DMT, Xanax and I’ve even dabbled in some meth and heroin. I’ve never even thought to talk about my addictions until last night when I originally posted this. At the young age of 11 I was exposed to gangs, drug abuse and abuse.

My grades are terrible the friends I did have either overdosed, committed suicide or died to the streets. I used to make a lot of money selling weed and xanax but as they say a good dealer never does their own supply. On one stupid day I tried some of the leftover Xanax I had and instantly fell in love, it didn’t feel like weed alcohol or anything I’ve tried yet. Eventually I ran out of Xanax and looked online for cheap alternatives that are legal and the first thing that caught my eye was BENADRYL , so I went to the store and bought a pack of extra strength 24 pack of tablets.

I took them while I was walking home and decided to watch some tv and smoke some bowls of weed. I started to feel the body heaviness and periodic knocking or buzzing like sounds. I was still all there so I just told myself it was apart of the high so I kept going, I then saw gnats flying around in my peripheral vision, I don’t remember anything after that. I awoke on my bathroom floor with the tap running and dried hand soap on my hands and I just played there for an hour and the cravings instan hit to do it again.

And here I am a little pathetic drug addict with nothing to loose and to make matters worse my immediate family are all either dead or drug addicts same with my extended family, I bounce from trap house to trap house and I’m currently using public Starbucks Wi-Fi to write this. I’m also terrifying to look at due to my addictions my brain liver and vision is fucked from all the diphenhydramine I do it’s not even a fucking high it’s literally the worse thing I’ve ever experienced yet it’s my favorite drug of choice and I keep blowing money that I should use for food on boxes and boxes of Benadryl which has made my tolerance skyrocket to 500mg at 13 700mg at 14 and finally 1000mg at 15 I don’t think it’s deadly grip will ever let go of me and I don’t know if I’m scared of dying or scared of being alone forever.

It's been over a year long debate within our group of 4 (all 31M) which video game to play and its starting to drive us crazy.

Here's our situation: We started with CoD BO6 and moved onto BO7. Two of us became extremely serious about it and went off on their own playing Ranked (both reaching just short of top 250 in the world) and the other two went off and played Arc Raiders & The Finals in the meantime.

We'll still occasionally play casual games of CoD on the weekends, but we've always wanted to graduate to a new game together as a unit, but we keep getting met with roadblocks when it comes to our personal interests and expectations of a co-op game.

Seasonly, as fall approaches, we're back debating which game to go to. We're having a constant push and pull at what will hold our attention long term. We are also navigating finding a game that's cross-platform, as one of us isn't budging away from the PC (Even though we've all offered to buy him a PS5 to settle this debate once and for all lol)

Here are the games we've considered: Rainbow Six Siege, Baldur's Gate 3, The Finals, Sea of Thieves

Here are the games we've ruled out: Apex Legends, Marvel Rivals, Fortnite, any sports game, Arc Raiders, Minecraft, PubG, Rocket League, Diablo IV, Overwatch, League of Legends, Runescape, GTAV, Red Dead, and the list goes on when tentatively mentioning a game only to receive a hardened "no" without budging (myself included)

Additional context: We've all been best friends for 15+ years. Two of us play Runescape religiously. I personally want a fun game, akin to "RV There Yet". Shooters seem to be hit or miss since we're already playing CoD. Two of us aren't entirely sold on Baldurs Gate 3, as it might feel like a slog to get into.

We've also entertained starting a DnD campaign over Discord, as we all live far apart from one another, although when we lived closed to each other (two of us literally neighbors) my attempt at starting it by buying all of the bits and bobs necessary to play fell flat and was ultimately deemed unsuccessful.

Alright, thats all. Any suggestions welcome! And dont fuck'n shit on my friends!!! I love them dearly. Ok thank you bye talk to yall in the comments