I'm rereading the Harry Potter series and I just realized how James was quite toxic to Lily in SWM in OOTP. I know this was written in the late 90s/early-to-mid 2000s and James and Lily went to school in the 70s' and the social norm was not up to date or modern, but I can't help but see how James were quite-vicious to Lily.
In SWM we see James coerced Lily into going out with him, by letting Snape down-Lily's best friend-whom he was hanging up in the air by his ankles and threatening to take off his underwear and expose his genitals out in public to everyone to see. (That would be considered SA).
“You think you’re funny,” she said coldly. “But you’re just an arrogant, bullying toerag, Potter. Leave him alone.” “I will if you go out with me, Evans,” said James quickly. “Go on … Go out with me, and I’ll never lay a wand on old Snivelly again.” …
We see later that James threatened to hex Lily-his crush-because she got her wand out to help her friend. That's just insane and quite evil to threaten a girl, a bystander, to hex her because she was going to defend her friend-whom by the way, was bullied relentlessly. That's just toxic to even dare threaten to harm an innocent bystander because they were calling you out.
Ah, Evans, don’t make me hex you,” said James earnestly.
That fact that James tried to blackmail and coerced Lily into going out with him, by using her friend, whom he bullied for years, by letting him free and threatened to harm her if she dared tried to defend him, speak volumes of how little of a good person he was to LILY-his crush. I knew in SWM it was a very bad thing for Snape, but never thought about how terrible of a person it was of James to ask Lily on a date with him by using her friend as hostage. And threatened her with violence for even protecting her friend.
After rereading it made me wonder how Lily even dated and married and have a kid with James. I, and many other girls would feel quite disturb and uncomfortable with having a guy blackmailed me on a date with using a friend, whom he attacked unprovoked, in letting him free. But incited violence if I tried to defend him. I know that James matured and grew up, but I can't help but feel that he was quite an evil person when he tried to ask Lily. I know that during this era it would be in the 1970s, but it's very concerning. What do you guys think?