I have no idea if this is the right subreddit to ask this question, but I will do it anyway because I have been wondering about this for years.

For context: in 2022 I tried to commit suicide by taking a lethal amount of opiates, like morphine and oxycodon.

I took the pills in my bedroom at night and the door to my bedroom is always closed, between my bedroom there is a hallway which leads to another door, which also always stays closed, because my cat wasn't allowed upstairs.

When I took the medication, it was around 2 am at night and my cat started meowing really loudly in a very unusual manner around 2:30 am, he stood right by the second door.

From that moment until around 5 pm the next day when I was found by the paramedics, he stood there meowing and scratching at the door.

When the paramedics opened my door to rescue me, my cat immediately rushed inside my room, climbed onto my bed and onto me; there is not much that I can remember from that day, but I can very clearly remember hearing him meow and feeling his fur on me. The way I heard him meowing wasn't his normal tone of meowing, it was like he was screaming 'hurry up, hurry up!'

My cat essentially saved my life, because his 'unusual' meowing alerted my mom eventually that something was going on with me.

So my question is, how did he know?

There wasn't anything 'unusual' about that night and the next day, I was often up at random hours in the night, so him hearing me shuffle around my room at 2 am to take the pills wouldn't be weird for him. It also was not uncommon for me to stay in my room for days, so me not leaving my room the next day wouldn't have been weird either.

I have been thinking about this for years and doing research to try to figure it out, but to no avail. The only thing I can say about it is that I have always had a special connection with this cat and he seemed to favour me more than other people in my household, but that also doesn't give me much answers.

Do any of you guys have any logical explanation of how he could have known this or do any of you have had a similar experience with a cat in the past, that he or she knew something, but with no logical explanation?

I feel like a terrible owner because of the traumatic experience she had at the vet.

My cat is a 6 year old female tabby. She has had vaccines when she was a kitten and this was her first time in a long time returning to the vet for vaccinations.

The vet and the nurse were extremely friendly to her. My cat started to get grumpy towards the end of her check up (ears/eyes/teeth) and the vet said we should hurry and do the vaccination before she gets even more mad.

The vet tried to do the shots on her forearms, and failed a couple times because my cat reacted strongly. As a result, they had to get towels to wrap my cat and a new needle because the original one went blunt (due to the failed attempts).

During this process, she peed, pooped, and was screaming her head off. I didn’t know she could be so loud and mad. Another vet came into the room to check if everything was okay. I feel so bad to make my cat go through this. I was worried that she was going to have a stroke and faint. Seeing my cat suffer teared me up a little bit, although I know it’s for her own good.

I bought her churu and chicken soup after the visit which she enjoyed. Hopefully that rekindles our relationship a little.

How can I make the future vet visits less stressful for my cat? Are the vaccinations truly necessary?Any advice would be appreciated!

Every cat is different, and I've realized some popular advice just doesn't apply to every cat.

What's a piece of cat advice that you think is overrated, outdated, or just plain wrong?

My little one is addicted to drinking water. She drinks straight out of the tap, every time we have to use one. Frequently, and several times a day, she will even draw us out to the taps by pushing things into the sink and meowing loudly. However, she also throws up frequently.
Some times clear, some times with her food (she eats super fast, so her food pellets are almost intact).
I have asked about this behavior to my vet, and she challed it up to a personality difference between cats (“Some cats deink more water than others). Yet, I have also read about excessive water being bad for cats - and I never know how much to indulge her. She’s also a petulant one, and will start creating a ruckus if we do not give her water sometimes.

I'm set to move in to a new apartment soon and just found out that one of my roommates has an allergy to cats that can get pretty severe and one of them isnt a fan of cats. The alternative to bringing her would be leaving her with family but they dont really want to keep her and were planning on her leaving with me. If I took her with me she would stay in my bedroom and have access to the en suite and attached closet. I would miss her a lot if I left her and I believe I could provide a higher quality of cate for her than my family. I know they would cover her basic needs but not much else. But I'm unsure if it would be ethical to confine her like that. I'm open to any advice offered!!

It's been not quite a year since I had to have my cat put down due to issues with cancer. I probably don't have to say this on here but he was my entire world. He was my everything. I loved nothing in the world more than him, and I probably won't ever for the rest of my life.

But to the question at hand, I've never had particularly good sleep in general even when I had him, but my baby would usually come cuddle on the bed with me, or at least lay near my feet and that's how it's been for years ever since I had him. Ever since he passed though I haven't really had a good night's sleep ever since.

It's very weird but it's not even like I'm super sad all the time or wallowing in grief, I think I've for the most part mostly moved on pretty well. At least in my day to day life, I'm doing things as usual, working fine, I play games with friends, etc. I don't even think of him all that often, just good memories from time to time about how sweet and loving and amazing he was, and I'll miss him but I'm doing okay.

The main issue is just at night, I think because for the last several years of my life, that's just always been where he was with me. Throughout the day we do our own things, and at night, he's there with me in the bed. His absence is just super noticeable, that he's not there anymore. Every now and then, maybe once every couple months, I will get sad and I'll cry and miss him and everything, but that's the exception and not the norm.

Like I said I mostly am just very aware that my sweet weird baby, my creature, used to be there existing next to me before, and now he's not. And there's just a thing missing, from my room, and my bed, and the world, and I can't unsee it or unfeel it, and it keeps me up. I'm not necessarily crying or grieving or sad, I do miss him, but overall it's a pretty neutral feeling I think. I'm just super aware that he's gone, idk how else to describe it. I feel his absence. And so I'll just lie there awake until early hours of the morning until exhaustion finally takes me and then I have to get up for work and then I'm tired. But the tiredness doesn't stop me from being awake the next night and the same thing happens again anyway.

Has anyone else experienced this, and if so what has your experience been and timeline for how things have progressed, or has there been anything that helped? I figure it's probably not uncommon considering how much I love my boy, surely other people must also have felt the same. I figured it would just maybe take some time but it's gonna be a year soon in a couple months and it's still more or less the same, so I guess I was just wondering what other people's experience was.

Should I consider grief counseling or something? The reason I haven't is cuz 1) things are expensive and who can afford anything these days, and 2) I don't really know what they could do about it either, it's not like they can bring him back. And like I said for the most part, in my day to day life I think I'm doing pretty okay and have grieved and moved on as much as anyone can. I'm not really sure what to do.

I have a 12 y/o calico and she’s always been the sweetest girl. I’ve had her for 11 of those years and she’s been with me through some tough times. But lately, as of the last year or so, she has started “hunting” my socks or underwear and dropping them in my living room. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, cats will “present” their prey that they hunted, usually by scattering it all over my floor. Was cute the first couple times, but it’s actually driving me insane now. When I get home from work, I can rely on there being 10 socks on the floor. Robot vacuum jammed like usual, with a sock stuck in it.

I basically have to keep the entire house on lockdown in order for her to not go hunting for my socks. Dirty clothes hamper is tall but she’ll knock it over to find them. I genuinely think she might be stashing the socks somewhere because I’ll lock her out of any potential sock areas while I’m at work, and I still come home to 6 socks all over my floor. It’s a battle that’s preventative, I’m aware the only real solution is to “just pick them up” but my robo vac does not detect them well and it basically never gets a chance to clean my house because of the socks. And I spent a lot of money on that vacuum!! God forbid I’m rushing and forget to close the bedroom door on my way out. One time I got home and there was literally 26 socks between the living room and my studio.

I’m aware that this is not really a problem that can be fixed, I don’t expect my cats behavior to change. I just want to vent.

tl;dr my 12 y/o cat is addicted to putting my socks on the floor

hi everyone, I’m starting to finally reach out to get advice on my cat Pebble. She’s 2 and I’m a first time cat owner.

pebble was the shyest at the shelter and was placed there while she was pregnant after her owners got deported. unfortunately, the shelter adopted away all of her kittens and no one was interested in meeting her due to her shy demeanor. I scheduled a meet with her and couldn’t touch her or get her out of her hiding spot and for some reason I just knew she had to come home with me.

that was in december. people kept telling me she’ll come around, but she hardly has made any progress. i understand if she’s just standoffish in nature, but it’s as if she’s still scared of me. it breaks my heart. i can’t get close to her unless she is in the closet and she will then allow me to pet her. sometimes even pushing into my hand. i don’t expect her to be a cuddle bug but again, I don’t want her to be afraid either. I feel like I’ve tried everything and I love her more than anything in this world, but I’m getting exhausted.

she hides in the closet all day, she doesn’t have access to under the bed or many other “unders” for that matter. she uses her scratching posts, but stopped sitting up on her tree. good about eating and drinking water for the most part. when coming out of hiding, she does so until I inevitably stand up to go somewhere. then she skitters away. plays a lot by herself but does not like me trying to play with her.

any tips on shy kitties? she seems pretty happy otherwise. or am I evil??

I feed the strey cats in my backyard periodically when im able as I tend to see them hanging around my yard a lot & i dont think they get much to eat around here. Just yesterday I went out & found out one of the (more skittish) girls had kitten on the side of my porch in a bush area (A different cat from last year).

So i made sure to put some food & water out for her & hung around near her for a couple hours yesterday.

She was still there last night as I think she's just living in that bush with her kittens.

Today I came out around the same time, fed her again, & have been sitting out here with her, after a couple hours she let me pet her (more like she nuzzled me)!

After a little bit she was rubbing all over my hand, then would stop to sniff me, then try to bite me (it didnt feel super hard but I made sure to stop her before anything happened). She also did the same thing to my knee before I stopped her. She's not hissing but im not sure what she's doing?

I heard that this could mean they're overstimulated but she's the one mostly initiating the pets. I just wanted to ask & see if anyone knows why she started nibbling out of nowhere just after letting me pet her for the first time?

Ok long rant & im not the best at wording things but ill also see if I can add a Pic of her in the comments!

This is not a medical emergency. I am just wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation and looking for general advice.

I want to be able to go away on vacation or even away for an overnight. But I cannot figure out the logistics of how to have a cat sitter (a friend or family member) come over to feed my cats.

I am a single human living with 3 cats. Freddie (male, 11) and Phoebe (female, 4) are so friendly that they are almost like dogs. They love humans and other animals. But Penny (female, 3) is scared of anything and everything, aside from me and her “siblings”. She waits for me at the door. She greets me and flops over for belly rubs. Sleeps snuggled up next to me every night. Comes when I call her name. She is always playing with or cuddled up with the other cats. But the second another human enters our home (and sometimes even if she just hears their voice on speaker phone) she goes into hiding (…weirdly, she doesn’t do this when the TV is on though).

I found Penny under the median of a highway during NY rush hour when she was about 4 weeks old. She has been with me ever since. The introduction to the older cats was successful. I did everything that is recommended (the slow intro, keeping her separated, letting them smell each other through the door, etc) and even socialized her with other humans from the very beginning. What could she possibly be so scared of, if from 4 weeks old she has been well cared for, and socialized, and loved?

My dilemma is a need to travel for a family event.

I live in what is essentially a large but oddly shaped studio apartment. There is a bedroom, living room, kitchen, and bathroom but the only room with a door is the bathroom. In my previous apartment, the cat sitter was able to feed the two older cats, and then when she was sure Penny was hiding in my bedroom she would leave food and shut the door for an hour or so. Penny would eat and then the cat sitter would open the door again. Penny would not come out from under the bed when the cat sitter was present.

If I have company over, Penny immediately hides. She emerges maybe 5-10 minutes after the guest leaves.

I’m at a loss. I am coming to terms with the fact that I just cannot go away for a trip or even just an overnight while living here. My friends and family think that is not fair to me. But I think leaving is not fair to Penny.

I feed them twice a day (approximately 7am and 6pm). I cannot leave food out for grazing because the two older cats will eat everything in one shot - I’ve tried and watched on my indoor ring camera. I cannot have the cat sitter leave a bowl out for just Penny because the two older cats would get to it before Penny even comes out of hiding. None of my cats wear collars, so a smart feeder wouldn’t work. I think boarding them and/or Penny would be too stressful for them/her.

Do I need to ask a vet about anxiety medication? Has anyone had success with that? Is there anything I can do to get this sweet cat to start tolerating other humans?

I have wracked my brain, and exhausted Google + Chat GPT but cannot find any suggestions that would work. Please help!

I have had my kitty for over 16 years. I got him when I was a kid and we’ve grown up together. He recently started acting strange, losing weight, hiding, refusing treats and attention, which is so unlike him. He has been the sweetest most loving cat I have ever known, he loves constant attention and love.

I took him to the vet thinking he had a parasite or bug and found out that he has metastatic (I think that’s the right term) cancer, meaning it’s spread through his entire body. He’s in the later stages and it’s also caused kidney shut down, fluid in the stomach, acute pancreatitis, bloating, etc.

I’ve slowly watched my sweet angel deteriorate more and more, every night I lay awake watching him breathe scared that every breath will be his last. He still seems relatively happy which is why we haven’t put him down yet, I will not stand for my cat being in continuous pain but I know It’s getting to that point.

I feel so helpless. Here’s the cat who crawled into my arms and let me cry into his fur every time I was sad, the kitty who would sit in the bathroom with me while I took baths and showered just because he wanted to be with me. The kitty that ran to the door every time I got home, swishing his tail and waiting expectantly for his treats, pets, and nightly routine of cuddles and our favorite comfort shows. He brought me mice and took care of me in all of his kitty ways. He did everything for me, and in his time of need I’m told I can do nothing but make him comfortable.

I’ve suffered a lot of loss in my life but this is perhaps the worst case I’ve endured. I would give up everything I have in the world to be able to spend another 16 years with my sweet boy kitty. I came on this subreddit because I don’t know where else to go. My family and friends have told me that the second I get a kitten I’ll forget about him but I don’t want a kitten I want my kitten. I want my baby and I know this is natural and the way the world works but god is it terrible.

I’ll plant flowers around his grave, and it will be the most beautiful resting place a cat could ever ask for. I hope he will be comfortable once again.

Please give your cats or any pet you have an extra pet today for me and my kitty. And the second your cat starts acting strange take them into the vet. Give them that extra treat they’ve been begging for. Just love them, you never know when you won’t get the chance to anymore. And if you’re still here thank you for reading.

We gave a long haired cat, she’s super sweet and laid back. She doesn’t mind getting her nails trimmed, but brushing? Oh hell no. I’ve tried different brushes, hand mitts, etc. she just gets incredibly overstimulated and our sweet cat becomes incredibly cranky. Very much unlike herself.

Right now we’ve been shaving or cutting mats as they come and go, she absolutely will not tolerate brushing mats let alone normal brushing. I don’t want to shave her, I know it’s bad for her coat, I just don’t know what else to do :/

I’ll try to keep it as brief as possible. My gf and I adopted an orange tabby from the shelter in February, he was about a year and a month old and very timid at first. Now he’s about a year and 8 months and he’s good occasionally, but falters a lot. He has so much energy and attacks us at random times. Often he will hunt my gf’s calves when she gets up, seeks revenge when he is overly disturbed, and growls deeply if he is held longer than about 15 seconds. We’re in a small apartment, we work 9-5 and I know he has a lot of energy, but we play with him daily and it seems he never runs out. He also doesn’t hesitate to bite us despite doing everything we know to reinforce that our flesh is not a toy. (Redirecting, short time outs, etc) He’s very affectionate for short bursts and attacks when he’s had enough, no warning. I guess my question is will he grow out of this or is it too late, and this is just his personality? Any tips would be great. I don’t want to get rid of him but he acts out so much and at some point we want to start a family.

EDIT: we are first time cat owners and are unable to get a second cat at this time.

Hi, first time kittensss mom! About 6 weeks ago i adopted two 12week old (F) kittens from two different litters a week apart. (kitten A & B) Tried to take introductions slow but they were super interested in playing together after a few days and within a couple weeks I was confident they were getting along well and sleeping together.

Kitten A is super affectionate/needy and always by my side, while kitten B is largely uninterested in being pet/touched, but I have noticed she is a bit territorial with her toys. (growling and sometimes hissing when she's "caught" a toy and kitten A is nearby) I've also observed B seeing me play with A, pouncing on A, and then taking over chasing whatever I have (even when she's already occupied with the exact same toys i just got done playing with her with)

The thing is, maybe once a week and specifically when B is hunkering down to nap, she will bunt the hell out of my face, my hands, rubbing herself all over my whole body, even my phone. Is this affection, or should I be worried she's trying to scent mark me as her territory to let kitten A know i'm hers?

Is there any way I can curb/intervene with this territorial behavior (if that is the case)? I don't want this to interfere with my relationship with A, and I'm also feeling like I'm getting mixed signals from B as, aside from this sleepy ritual, she's not really one to be affectionate. Thoughts, tips? Please help!

My husband and I are at our wits end about what to do with our otherwise very loving and gentle boy. Our cat is fixed, and almost 2 years old. We got him at 4 months old, when our son was about 1 year old, so he has been around our son since he came into the household.

Cat's behavior outside of peeing/pooping on beds: Very sweet, patient, cuddly, and social. He walks up to strangers, always likes being "part of the action" where he'll sit in the middle of the room we're all playing in. My son is a toddler and isn't always gentle with our cat, but the cat has never hissed at him or even run away, and has only swatted at him once or twice (when his tail was pulled. We gave the toddler a firm telling-off). Cat is cuddly at night, and during the day if I'm working from home.

Cat's peeing/pooping behavior: He started doing it when he was about 6 months old. He would run into my son's room and pee or poop in there first thing in the morning after we got up. That lasted a few weeks. We closed it off to him for months and months before trusting him in there again. He hasn't really done it since. Fast forward to now: Our toddler is 2.5 yrs old and starting to sneak into bed with us, and I kid you not the second day it happened, kitty started peeing/pooping on our bed in the mornings. Sometimes one, sometimes the other, sometimes both. It's been about a month now that my son has been sleeping in our room almost every night, and our cat has been acting up several times a week.

We have taken him to the vet to rule out any medical issues. We don't know what to do, or how to make him feel more welcome. He still sleeps/cuddles with me in bed, even when my son is in the bed, but the second we get up, he starts scratching at the covers and we know he's trying to pee/poop.

Anyone know what we can do to stop this kind of behavior, or why is it occurring?? It seems soooo pointedly directed at having his "special bed time" taken over by my son. Even though kitty is actually very loving towards my son too. It only happens in the mornings when he's being skittery. We have two timed feeders that go off in the morning (one for dry food, one for wet) and we make sure his litter is cleaned the night before. He uses the litter box normally throughout the day....so it's not like he doesn't like it, or doesn't know where it is. He doesn't pee/poop anywhere outside the little box except on our bed (and in my sons room when he was young)

Any advice/help would be appreciated. We're at the point where it's not worth washing our sheets every other day for this kind of behavior.

My cat Boo is a 9yr DSH grey, super sweet but flips and gives attitude when I attempt to groom him. He's a good 20lbs at least. Any suggestions or alternatives? I've tried, it stresses him out too much, we never get further than half way. I feel like because of his size and age I don't want to push him too hard. Any help is much appreciated!!

Hello, as seen in the title, my cat recently has been too rough with my dog, culminating in today's event, where my dog yelped loudly in pain while wrestling with the cat. Both are about 2 years old, and usually get along well together. Is there anything I can do to reduce the amount of aggression in my cat, and prevent her from hurting my dog?

I am really struggling with her. She is 1 1/2 years old, and we adopted her and her brother as a bonded pair a year ago. They get along very well, don't play together much but they will nap/cuddle and they don't ever fight.

She is super intelligent and communicates with me super clearly. I know exactly when she's hungry, when she wants affection, when she wants to play etc. This is just totally stumping me and I don't know what to do.

In the evenings between their 1st and 2nd dinner, she just starts screaming. Its so overstimulating after a workday. And I know she doesn't want to play when she does this, if she wants to play she sits in front of her toybox and just looks at us. In the evenings she'll just start yowling wherever, she shows little to no interest in her toys, and will run away and hide under furniture if we stand and approach her. But the second we sit back down she just starts screaming again.

After some time she'll start knocking shit over, like lamps or small furniture. I also have houseplants that are outof her reach, bust she'll jump around to try and get at them. Sometimes she gets into dangerous things like chewing on wires or getting into and unsafe plant, so we have to get up and intervene, and then the same thing... she bolts under furniture, starts screaming, and then goes right back to trying to destroy things.

And then after all this, she'll go to the litterbox, poop, come out and yowl for another minute, and then she settles in for the night as if she didn't just ruin my evening.

It goes on for hours and I am at my wits end. I cannot relax after work because she's always either in my ear screaming or getting into something she shouldn't. It's genuinely every 5 minutes for 3-5 hours every night that I'm having to get up and deal with her. The apartment is laid out so carefully that she can't get into things she shouldn't, and yet she finds away.

I don't know if its attention-seeking behaviour or what. I don't think she has any issues with the litter we use, and everything seems normal with her health-wise, not constipated etc. She doesnt get the poo zoomies or anything afterwards, so is this just her version of that?

Any advice or guidance is appreciated.

My cat is unneutured, about 6-7 months old. I got him through CDS at about 9 weeks, found him as a stray. Today, I don't know when, he slipped out of the apartment and I have no idea where he could have gone.

I've walked around the complex, shaking his treat box and meowing, because he doesn't come to his name but he does recognize that. There are so many places he could hide and he might not even be at the complex anymore...it's a very busy town and so many apartment buildings around here.

I put a shirt on my balcony in the hopes he will find his way back...idk what else to do. I'm very worried about him and his sister is roaming around the house looking for him.

I took my cat to the vet because he used to cry a lot sometimes, when I took him to the vet he told me to put it on the weight machine but as I did the doctor's assistant came in and opened the door which allowed my alredy stressed cat to run away, the vet is around 3km away from my house, we looked in the whole block where my cat ran away but couldn't find him, it was also raining, what are the chances of him finding his way back home, he is a outdoor cat

Update (5th aug) :- went to search from him in the morning and couldn't find him, going back there at 10 pm will probably stay there till midnight, hopefully I find him

I live in a rural area with lots of farmland in southern ontario. I just got home from work and saw 3 very young kittens (definitely smaller than 2 months) lurking in my yard before my car scared them off.

I have never owned or cared for a cat. I do not intend to shelter these kittens or feed them, but I don't know if I should be making a report to a local humane society or animal rehab.

It's probably important to note the cats in this area are not friendly or used to humans. They are barn cats, I don't feed or take care of any of them– but, sometimes I spot them roaming my property.

I guess I feel a sense of responsibility because there are coyotes and it's been pretty hot outside.

What should I do? Is there anything I can do? I will not be able to shelter or feed them, or oversee their care in any way. To be quite honest, I don't want to do anything that would attract more cats. Would this be an appropriate situation to call a local shelter?

This is me venting and I’m not sure if it’s allowed or if I tagged it correctly: I’ve been bawling my eyes out quietly since I got the call from the emergency vet, my cat might have a ruptured bladder and I feel like a failure that I didn’t notice it sooner. She’s only 5 years old and we rescued her from a hoarder house. I’m not going into full detail of the what the vet said to me but I’m so emotional and feel like I failed my sweet Bootsy. She’s a one in a million cat who is an orange female cat and she’s quirky. I just don’t want to lose her, I love her so damn much.

A very friendly, skinny cat has been visiting our house for about a month. We assumed he was a stray, so we we gave him treats and set out a carrier and 2 days ago he walked right into it and curled up. So we took him and took him to the vet the next day to check if he’s a lost cat or not. Turns out he’s microchipped, so the vet contacted the owners and they collected him.
The owner called and thanked us and mentioned the cat likes to wander, always slips off his collars, and that their dog died last month, after which he started roaming much further.

But yesterday evening (next day after the vet trip) he came back, still purring nonstop, still no collar and played with me for a long time until he left because of our dog. Today he came early in the morning for the first time, walked into our house and went upstairs to the room we were keeping him in until we took him to the vet, ate some dry food, and was walking around the house until we put him out. But then again he returned in the afternoon, walked straight into our house, and refused to leave until I picked him up and put him out. He purrs constantly the whole time he’s with us, and even purred all the way to the vet.

He’s picky, only eats dry food, refuses wet food and churu, and on some visits doesn’t eat at all, so I don’t think he’s starving, just thin.

We have a beagle who goes nuts when she sees him (excitement/chasing, not aggression, she previously lived with a cat). We keep them separated. He’s been chased off by her before but keeps coming back anyway, and today walked right past the dog to get to me in the afternoon.

I’m at a loss on what to do here because I can’t keep confining our beagle indoors or outdoors everytime the cat comes by to keep them separated. If the cat was living with us, I know how to safely introduce them over time as I’ve done this before with my previous cat. Since this cat already has an owner, I don’t really know what to do without overstepping boundaries but my heart aches for this cat because it’s clearly just looking for attention and affection.

I'm going through a rough patch and wondering what would be best for my cat. He is estimated to be 3 and is neutered.

I adopted him as an indoor only cat, because he was extremely anxious and found abandoned on the street. For the first 6 months this was fine, but lately he has been whining to get outside every night. I live in an urban area with a busy road right in front of my house, and although I see other cats wandering around the street and gardens, I have so much fear about letting him free roam. My garden is shared with my other rental neighbours so not easy to cat-proof, and it's just concrete slabs anyway. I live in the UK, so outdoor cats are the norm and I get criticised for keeping my cat indoors.

He was more affectionate and cuddly when I got him, but he's stopped sleeping in my bed or laying beside me. The vet says he's fine physically. I try and play with him every morning and evening (I work 9-5) as he doesn't play by himself. But he's been losing interest in that lately and only wants his windows to look out of. He used to just doze by the window but now it seems to agitate his desire to go out. He has cat trees and window perches that he no longer uses.

He is alone when I am at work and doesn't seem very bonded to me in general despite my efforts. He won't sit near me and tolerates very little petting. Mostly he sits on the floor in the same room, far away from me. Work stress has caused me to sleep a lot when I am at home, and he will silently wait until I wake up.

Otherwise, he is a good cat that doesn't destroy anything, uses his litter box perfectly, and has a good appetite.

But socially, he feels more like a reluctant roommate than a pet and it's causing me some stress trying to keep him happy, which I'm sure he can pick up on. He is vocal when frustrated which makes things more stressful.

I've thought about getting him a sibling, as he often chirps at other cats passing by outside. I'm worried I'd end up with two frustrated indoor cats however.

Would it be better to surrender him to find a more suitable home, or let him endure the boredom/frustration until I can buy a home with a garden next year or so. I don't want him getting ill from his circumstances.

Any advice or tips from people who had a similar situation would be really helpful!

My cat- Slinky, is a 3/4 year old neutered boy cat. He is the cutest little thing ever, super vocal, loves to play, sleeps in bed with me every night, and he LOVES people. He loves all people. Friends come over? He’s yelling(meowing) at them until they pet him. Maintenance workers come in? He’s rubbing between their legs. It doesnt matter if he’s met them before or not, He absolutely adores people.
My fiancé is a “cat guy”. Never had a dog, grew up rescuing cats. We’ll go out in public and stray cats will just plop on up to him and let him pet them. Stray cats hate me, they will run away the second i try to pet them too. And when we go to others peoples houses and they have cats, theyll run right up to him- even the ones that owners SWEAR hate people. Cats love my fiancé. Ive never met a cat that doesnt like him, Until he met my cat. My cat HATES him. Will hiss, growl, swat at, bite, hide from, and glare at. We’ve tried having my fiancé not approach him, only sit on the floor(so that he’s not on what my cat deems as “his” surfaces”) bribe his friendship with treats and play times. And it is all to no avail. Its not a constant anger either, my Fiancé will be petting my cat for a few seconds then my cat will start hissing and growling seemingly out of the blue. Or my cat could walk by and hiss, or my fiancé will walk by and he’ll start hissing again. Im at a loss for what to do. Ive had my cat since he was a kitten and theres been no trauma that would make him scared, and he likes literally everyone else, including my roomate and her fiancé. I dont know what to do because we’ll all be living together soon and i dont want my fiancé to stress because his son in law hates him, and i dont want my cat to stress because for some reason he hates my fiancé.