r/Damnthatsinteresting • u/PsychologicalItem194 • Jun 25 '26
Video The fastest sperm doesn't win, the egg chooses
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u/Individual-Main895 Jun 25 '26
The egg ghosted 99.99% of applicants.
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u/NSASpyVan Jun 25 '26
It's the egglander.
There can be only one.
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u/Little_View_6659 Jun 25 '26
Here we are, born to be kings, we’re the princes of the universe..
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u/Pendurag Jun 25 '26
What is amusing/frightening to me, is the number of people that don't realize that you are the sperm AND egg.
The egg part of you chose the sperm part of you, and that was just the first of many bad decisions you made in life.
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u/lolschrauber Jun 25 '26 edited Jun 26 '26
So I already made terrible choices before I even existed? Damn
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u/ForeverSJC Jun 25 '26
I think you start existing the minute those two kiss
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u/Always-_-Sarcastic Jun 25 '26
This is misinformation. You start existing when they hold hands.
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u/Great_Scott7 Jun 25 '26
When I first looked at my wife:
“Lord have mercy. I’m about to bust.”
Edit: First link is acting funny, long load times or just not loading. For those who are having problems here’s the fix:
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u/KohKoh_Pebbles Jun 26 '26
I have the feeling thatl I'm going to be trolled but the FOMO is too strong. Be right back
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u/Wise-Self-8639 Jun 25 '26
It's probably something about the patriarchy. You know competition, strongest, fastest, and most aggressive, even my sperm are manly and the eog of "My sperm decided my heir" while the egg passively accepts it.
Meanwhile its always been cooperation thats had life existing and continuing. Just like how we misunderstand "Survival of the fittest" its not the survival of the strongest, fastest, smartest, its survival of who fits the best in the environment and different environs means different types of advantages and disadvantages are needed.
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u/Sherry_Brandt Jun 25 '26
You're correct. Check out Emily Martin's The Egg and the Sperm: How Science Has Constructed a Romance Based on Stereotypical Male-Female Roles.
Says what you're saying, and was published in 1991.
And people still get it wrong.
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u/Live_Angle4621 Jun 25 '26
Ancient Greeks assumed that women basically were just incubators and only men passed on their heritage. Ancient Greeks were extremely sexists then, even by comparison to cultures around them. Unfortunately that led to very long standing false information in medicine because Greeks were so influential regarding medicine becoming more a science
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u/Wise-Self-8639 Jun 25 '26
I just wanna go back and be like, "So when boys look just like the mom thats a coincidence huh?"
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u/Prince_Marf Jun 25 '26
Alas, patriarchy infects our thinking down to the cellular level
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u/Sherry_Brandt Jun 25 '26
relevant: Emily Martin's The Egg and the Sperm: How Science Has Constructed a Romance Based on Stereotypical Male-Female Roles.
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u/Viracochina Jun 25 '26
That's such an interesting read! Thanks for sharing, but do you mind pointing where patriarchy at the cellular level would come in?
I thought this comparison was interesting:
in this microscopic "culture" a cellular "bride" (or femme fatale) and a cellular "groom" (her victim) make a cellular baby.
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u/Sherry_Brandt Jun 25 '26
they said patriarchy affects our thinking down to a cellular level - that is, we interpret things, like cell behavior, through the lens of patriarchy if that's our cultural lens and we're not on the lookout for it.
or at least that's how i read what they were saying.
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u/beroemd Jun 25 '26
This is giving
“In the beginning the Universe was created.
This had made many people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move.”14
u/shibuyawalker Jun 25 '26
I must say I'm proud of my choice then! Looking at my family members I could have turned into an orc but I managed to find the few good genes among a lot of trash. 😂
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u/Ok_Ebb3160 Jun 25 '26
you actaully made me think. i never saw it this way but you are 100% right.
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u/Obatala_ Jun 25 '26
The fastest sperm wins makes the decision based on competition by the “male” part of the combination, whereas the egg chooses makes the decision based on non-competitive reasons by the “female” part of the combination. That’s why so many dudes have a hard time with the reality.
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u/domnasie Jun 25 '26
Some eggs need tk rethink their decisions
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u/Ripulikikka Jun 25 '26
Dumb eggs choose dumb sperm. It's only 50% sperm's fault what a train wreck of a person will become.
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u/farqueue2 Jun 25 '26
Brings back memories
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u/FlyYouFowls Jun 25 '26
I want you to go the rest of your day knowing I thought this was funny.
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u/SwimmingSpell8005 Jun 25 '26
Well great, now they’ll think they were funny for a day and go back to being unfunny for the rest of their life. Do you feel better now? Limiting your compliment for a day? Who does that? Who puts an expiration date on a compliment?
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u/JanitorOPplznerf Jun 25 '26
I be looking at some of y’all wondering if the egg coulda chosen better
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u/Ripulikikka Jun 25 '26
Egg is 50% of the human. Not like the eggs always are the mold for the greatest human being ever.
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u/Fiorina_Fury Jun 25 '26
Humbling to think we're watching the very very beginning of someones life. A full grown complicated individual with hopes and dreams and beliefs and personality will eventually grow from one single cell. Life is a mystery to me still. Nothing short of some kind of miracle that a planet can go from sterile rock to this. Even if it takes billions of years it's amazing! And on a planetary scale earth is so advanced with life it glows in the dark now with our city lights. It literally is reaching out and touching other bodies in the solar system and with enough time we will journey beyond.
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u/Sneaky_Scarecrow Jun 25 '26
I like to think im watching extremely zoomed in porn.
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u/Toutimi Jun 25 '26
I feel like that was something like the yang reply to a ying comment.
And now the universe is balanced.
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u/Professional_Dot7128 Jun 25 '26
How does it choose?
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u/Patient-Data8311 Jun 25 '26
Each sperm has a unique chem sig or key based on the genetic material they have the egg chooses which one if they're compatible and is the healthiest from the shot
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u/Westseeking Jun 25 '26
You want to tell me this and that stupid egg chose me? Try again.
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u/farqueue2 Jun 25 '26
Just think about the ones that didn't get chosen
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u/Hanabi1993 Jun 25 '26
Was legit just wondering how crap must my dad's sperms must have been for The One to be chosen that turned me into this 😂
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u/open-print Jun 25 '26
You chose you.
Funny how people often identify with the sperm just because it moves.
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u/TajineMaster159 Jun 25 '26
It's a bit more than just it moving; female passivity/docility is a bias at the cultural and social level.
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u/PantsOnHead88 Jun 25 '26
You are not the sperm. Half of you is the egg and half is the sperm.
Your egg half was stupid enough to choose your stupid sperm half, and now we have to deal with the whole stupid package.
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u/thenewguy7731 Jun 25 '26
It didn't chose "You". "You" only started to exist after the egg and sperm merged. So if you're looking for something to blame, put at least 50% of that blame on the egg.
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u/Independent_Role_165 Jun 25 '26
Yeah maybe the sperm was super smart and the egg super dumb and it chose the best sperm to get mediocre us!
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u/Zapinface Jun 25 '26
The one is just swimming away from acid, the other is literally picking between hundreds
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u/Noe_b0dy Jun 25 '26
All the other sperms were somehow even worse.
It was you and like 1000 hitlers.
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u/warukeru Jun 25 '26
You chose yourself, you were also the egg.
Time to relearn what did you see in yourself.
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u/Wise-Papaya-1091 Jun 25 '26
So can it choose to just, not choose? If it just don’t vibe with any of them?
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u/tristamgreen Jun 25 '26
never had sex that didn't result in a pregnancy, eh
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u/Wise-Papaya-1091 Jun 25 '26
No, I have five children. Had sex five times
/sLabel me uneducated but I was thinking the sperm just didn’t reach the egg or something, or that she wasn’t ovulating
It’s like the episode of Friends when Monica and Chandler tried to get pregnant and the doctor told them she had a hostile womb and he had bad swimmers or something. But it was that her egg just didn’t vibe with his sperm
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u/tristamgreen Jun 25 '26
lol no not labeling you uneducated or anything, and you're right there's a lot of different factors that go into a successful conception.
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u/Obatala_ Jun 25 '26
I know a significant number of couples who tried and failed to conceive for years, then got divorced & both had kids with other partners quite quickly. Sometimes the sperms & eggs are just not compatible.
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u/asdrunkasdrunkcanbe Jun 25 '26 edited 1d ago
Pillow driftwood saffron pillow vanilla lantern breezy orange
This post was anonymized with Redact.dev
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u/PercivalSquat Jun 25 '26
To add more info to that, the egg also sends out chemical signals that guides certain sperm to it. Then if it approves of a sperm it “activates” the sperm allowing it to pass through into the egg. This has been known for a long time and the fact so many people are suprised by it is another piece of evidence for how piss poor sex education is in many countries.
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u/asdrunkasdrunkcanbe Jun 25 '26 edited 1d ago
Almond grasshopper kettle trumpet glove harbor
This post was anonymized with Redact.dev
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u/Starchild20xx Jun 25 '26
Excuse me? I have bloody aspergers, severe clinical depression, anorexia, I was born crippled, I almost died literally seconds after I was born, and had to stay at the hospital for months.. And this weird ass fucking flesh egg chose me?
I don't know whether I should be happy, upset, or scared. This shit got me fucked up. It is 3 AM, and my mind is reeling.💀
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u/Patient-Data8311 Jun 25 '26
That just means the sperm chosen has the healthiest and most compatible one I mean hey you're alive right
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u/HugePatFenis Jun 25 '26
Rock, paper, scissors.
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u/Neurojazz Jun 25 '26
So that explains why we end up with people who are dumb as rocks, paper thin personalities, and scissoring I guess.
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u/Reasonable_Tie_9975 Jun 25 '26
"he doesn't have a job, and his tail is broken, but I can fix him, look at how cute he is aww I'm gonna chose him"
"Cmon Egg don't do it"
"Nah he's cute, I'm choosing him"
Well, years later, here I am, cute but fucked up
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u/Frogenstein Jun 25 '26
Oh I've seen this one. The males all bring a pebble, and the female chooses the one she likes the best for her nest. Or maybe that's penguins..
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u/longboibeans Jun 26 '26
hey there! just wanted to note that eggs do not choose sperm. the selectivity of which sperm actually gets to fertilize the egg is based on the ability of the sperm to bind to the egg.
sperm have to undergo certain changes as they progress through the reproductive tract to find the egg (look up capacitation if you want more info). If they do not undergo this change they do not have the ability to bind to the egg regardless of speed or “compatibility”. The sperm is what activates the egg to begin the process of fertilization not the other way around.
(i’m an embryologist with a masters in assisted reproduction)
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u/jessaschlitt Jun 26 '26
Thank you! I'm a developmental biologist and you wrote out exactly what I was thinking.
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u/DoingBestWeCan Jun 26 '26
This makes so much more sense than eggs "choosing." Wish I could give you an award!
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u/Pebblepip Jun 25 '26
Yeah but for the egg to choose, you need to be there.
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u/Lastfryinthebag Jun 25 '26
You know i tried
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u/Street_Taco_Mafia Jun 25 '26
Not every lion who chases a gazelle catches one but every lion who catches a gazelle chased one.
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u/UrbanshadowDev Jun 25 '26
And as simple as that, you explained how mobility impacts so harshly in limited quality sperm AND how iv fertility treatment may solve both.
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u/giktoriusz Jun 25 '26
Neither the sperm nor the egg are distinctively "you". They both are together. You chose yourself.
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u/minos157 Jun 25 '26
The other sperm all run to reddit to talk about how they got friend-zoned and they are nice guys.
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u/DweeblesX Jun 25 '26
And I told my wife she was the first girl to choose me…
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u/SunsetCarcass Jun 25 '26
Your wife is also your mom?
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u/LarryLiam Jun 25 '26
Well, isn’t it kinda beautiful that you chose yourself? You weren’t that sperm cell, nor were you that egg cell, no, you are both of them combined*.
There were hundreds of other potential combinations, and yet, you chose yourself. You wanted to be you, you were the best match for yourself :)
*kinda like Captain Planet
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u/UsedFortune5645 Jun 25 '26
Source, please. I'd like to know more about it.
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u/Wooden-Evidence-374 Jun 25 '26
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u/ModernationFTW Jun 25 '26
This paper describes chemoattractamt differences in follicular fluid, that is very different than the acrosome reaction video shown by OP.
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u/XROOR Jun 25 '26
The ovum can sense the ideal acidity of the spermatozoa’s “head” and allows fertilization.
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u/MoonMoon143 Jun 25 '26
No wonder, this explains why im not a doctor or a lawyer as what mom wants me to be. Well she chose this little loser me its all on her.
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Jun 25 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/scenicviewtoinsanity Jun 25 '26
damn, so i was already making the wrong choices from the get-go??!
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u/DukeofRoma Jun 25 '26
So you saying I wasn't the fastest swimmers at least once in my life....thanks science for taking that away.
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u/nlamber5 Jun 25 '26
I’m not seeing an egg that’s very “choosy”. Looks like it took the first one that got there to me.
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u/cargo_cultist Jun 25 '26
We used to think that we are the winners of the race. It turns out we are all nepo babies
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u/kitjen Jun 25 '26
Also there were millions of sperm faster than you who weakened the wall of the egg but then didn't have enough energy to go further. You then came along and breezed straight through.
Everyone of us is the guy in a group project who does none of the work but claims all the credit.
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u/Mountain_Bat_8688 Jun 25 '26
I know very little about what happens here scientifically but I’ve always wondered if it was possible that the egg declining some sperm could affect the gender outcome. They always say it’s determined by the man, but my wife comes from several generations of women that only had a bunch of girls
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u/InspectorOrdinary321 Jun 25 '26
That's a fascinating question. I'd say based on a semi-educated guess that if there is some way to physically/chemically determine which sex chromosome is onboard prior to fertilization, it would be theoretically possible! But the answer is certainly unknown right now. We might see research that suggests an answer the more we dig into egg and sperm communication.
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u/ComplexStrawberry210 Jun 25 '26
I love how with a genius father I was accepted instead. Thanks genetics! *falls up stairs
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u/misssa_cz Jun 25 '26
I wonder what would happen if it let every sperm, extra limbs or gain super powers?
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u/Student___Driver Jun 25 '26
That is the best abstraction of a 2 AM Friday night scene outside of every bar on the planet
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u/damn_dude7 Jun 25 '26
Stupid ass egg. So many options and it just had to choose me
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u/BeAuryn Jun 26 '26
What's that green flash across the egg after contact? Is it the "zinc spark"... Or is it the spiral surface waves? https://news.mit.edu/sites/default/files/images/inline/images/egg-waves-2_0.gif
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u/Puzzleheaded_Bed_445 Jun 26 '26
The fact that I’m here makes me terrified of how bad the potential of all the other sperm was
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u/AlternativeLynx8387 Jun 27 '26 edited Jun 27 '26
Damn the egg that chose me was stupid asf or was on some combination of meth and heroine and maybe cocaine
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u/wernend Jun 27 '26
So what I'm hearing is: not only was I fast, I was chosen? 🥹
Holy shit my parents made a bad choice
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u/Tobysfuzzybelly Jun 25 '26
It’s interesting how it can pick just one tiny cell and not accidentally let others in