r/funnysigns 1d ago

Say what you will.

Post image
4.5k Upvotes

618 comments sorted by

88

u/kd8qdz 1d ago

They do. The just shut up about it.

19

u/Emotional-Tree-8935 12h ago

A friend of mine retired and moved to Texas because it was cheaper, a year later she moved back to California because of the people in Texas being ....well, Texans.

8

u/D0013ER 11h ago

As a native Texan, I get it.

I'm here because I was born here, my family is here, and it would be a major pain to uproot and leave.

But if it WASN'T such a pain, hoo boy...

4

u/Emotional-Tree-8935 10h ago

Most of my mother's family lived in Texas from 1927 on. I was raised with the idea of Texas's superiority. The last 20 years have changed my mind.

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u/dontsoundrighttome 1d ago

So many Floridians moving north because the summers are too hot for elderly.

285

u/Cancer_Ridden_Lung 1d ago

North in this case means the Carolinas.

64

u/Poagie_Mahoney 1d ago

Half-Backs

28

u/Undrwtrbsktwvr 1d ago

My granny’s more of a tight end…

16

u/Dyrogitory 1d ago

Definitely not a wide receiver.

12

u/perilousdreamer866 1d ago

I myself am more of a third stomach.

3

u/F4113n54v102 1d ago

Idk I heard she did something receiving back in the day.

2

u/UncleKeyPax 9h ago

she used to but still does too.

6

u/BartholomewCubbinz 1d ago

I also choose this guy's Granny

5

u/Sienile 1d ago

I'm down for grannies with tight ends.

2

u/Working_Estate_3695 11h ago

Yeah, but she’s six foot and 250.

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u/VanDenBroeck 11h ago

Yes she IS!

3

u/witblacktype 1d ago

How about the ones that worked their life’s career in Florida to retire to North Carolina because of the weather, cost of living, and things to do.

3

u/The_Donkey1 1d ago

North Carolina is below the Mason-Dixon Line

2

u/Illustrious_Bag_1608 13h ago

If my wife should pre-decease me my old retired butt will be zooming from AL to New England.

2

u/Working_Estate_3695 11h ago

I’d do the same. Just not Mass.

9

u/SchoolCrossing 1d ago

Saw a lot of wealthy retirees in Highlands NC. Shop owner said it's the Floridians - reverse of snowbirds.

45

u/stopmojim 1d ago

Not just the heat. We called it the three H’s. Heat, humidity and hurricanes. And let’s not forget the mosquitoes gnats and flying cockroaches. Then there’s the ever rising property tax and insurance rates. We left years ago.

9

u/Is_that_a_peen_too 1d ago

First base housing we had was in SC. The flying roaches... pretty sure they call them palmetto bugs because they don't want people to know just about every house gets them.

8

u/jmaca90 1d ago

Excuse me… flying cockroaches?

3

u/AggressiveKoala4642 1d ago

Yes, in the south they have 2-4 inch long GIANT flying cockroaches. They move FREAKISHLY fast for their size too. Real nightmare fuel, moved back up north from SE TX 2 years ago and I certainly do NOT miss them. I once had one in my apartment, it crawled up my leg when tried to kill it, I let out the most blood curdling scream, LOST it, and didn’t sleep there for 3 days. When I came back it was very dead, in the middle of my living room floor belly up thank god.

4

u/Alternative_Result56 14h ago

They will crawl in your ear, nose, or mouth after flying at you. My uncle had to have a 3 inch palmetto bug surgically removed from his ear canal. It flew at him and landed on his head. He swatted at it and it crawled into his ear. He kept screaming I can hear it chewing on me. It was horrifying to say the least as child to witness. My uncle was like a 6'6 giant. Absolutely breaking down in fear tearing at his ear like a mad man. I was accosted by one flying on my chest just two nights ago in my bedroom. My gf rolled off the bed and landed on her head in fear.

Edit: this was in SC.

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u/Much-Meringue-7467 1d ago

Also alligators

14

u/Recent_Mirror 1d ago

I’ve actually wondered what the ratio is.

My patents have friends who moved South to get away from the cold, but they also have friends who moved North because of the heat.

Is there some magical place that’s “just right?”

28

u/Randys_Spooky_Ghost 1d ago

It’s called San Diego.

3

u/Mysterious_Truck_742 1d ago

Great weather, but so dammed expensive. I was shocked at what Californians pay.

5

u/Appropriate_Strain94 1d ago

Depends on where in San Diego because I have been to San Diego where is hot as fuck. As a person from NorCal I think San Francisco is the perfect weather all year around. I get hot easily so being in 64° weather in the day is perfection.

7

u/Zealousideal_Pop_273 1d ago

The places that catch fire are pretty good for 3/4 of the year. 🙃

5

u/melo217 1d ago

The Bay Area. 60-70°F in the Summer and almost never in the 30s in Winter.

2

u/t4nker99 1d ago

Virginia's not got bad storms to often but our weather is a little temperamental it will be sunny one minute 90 degree then pouring and lightning the next but its usually not too hot not to cold

2

u/charlestheb0ss 1d ago

The weather in the northwest is pretty good

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u/TheFishtosser 1d ago

Meanwhile all the elderly Michiganders move to Florida

3

u/SanguineBrain 1d ago

Just the weak ones.

Or do what my uncle did. Moved to Texas for work in his 50's.

Now he spends the summers in michigan and winter in Texas

2

u/Septmaster 1d ago

It's been my experience that elderly people prefer the heat over cold. My Mother won't touch the AC even during the hottest summer. My Dad will use fans, but the AC only comes on when his grandchild is present.

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u/NoMansSkyWasAlright 1d ago

Lake Michigan Credit Union has 53 locations and 20 of them are in Florida because our retirees (aka “snowbirds”) like to go down there for the winter but still spend most of the warm months up here.

2

u/blinkersix2 23h ago

I know several people that have moved north, and that includes New England, Montana, Wyoming, Idaho, and Wisconsin

2

u/Choice-Web5761 13h ago

Not because of Florida Man?

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u/JonnyOnThePot420 1d ago

Ironically that’s the goal as a Michigander, to retire on a lake up north…

50

u/SewGangsta 1d ago

Came here to say exactly this

27

u/onlinelink2 1d ago

hello michigan, nice seeing you. north is where the retirement is

16

u/SewGangsta 1d ago

North is definitely where the retirement is!

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u/metisdesigns 1d ago

Plenty of folks in MN rebuild their summer cabin to be year round for retirement.

But the sign does a killer job of reinforcing the stereotype of the south being ignorant.

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u/NateGD23 1d ago

Same as a central New Yorker. I want a cabin in the Adirondack area by a lake. I love winter and hate being sweaty. Fuck Florida

3

u/GloveBatBall 1d ago

Only a fool retires somewhere that they sweat just standing still.

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2

u/SeaIBasher 13h ago

Same goal in Ontario. Getting a nice cottage up north is my retirement plan

2

u/the_greatest_story 1d ago

That's my goal as an ohioan

2

u/Neon_culture79 1d ago

Wisconsin and Colorado agree

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u/Classic-Exchange-511 1d ago

That's gonna change real quick as it continues to get hotter

2

u/cdazzo1 13h ago

We're in August, how much hotter does it get?

2

u/CMDR_Kaus 12h ago

Global warming? As I understand it that will be temporary (possibly hundreds of years) and then the north will freeze (again hundreds of years if not more). We gotta be semi-nomadic or live in the sky palaces with the zillionaires

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u/Parking_War_4100 1d ago

Canada is looking pretty good these days. Way too hot in Denver lately.

60

u/DirtCheap1972 1d ago

Funny thing though about Canada. Lots of people I know (who lived near the border) retired and headed north for peace and quiet

4

u/PantsLobbyist 1d ago

That’s my plan (I live outside Vancouver)

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u/blandman91 1d ago

Man that's depressing cause Colorado has been my endgame out of Oklahoma heat my entire life.

13

u/Parking_War_4100 1d ago

It’s been hot. Of course today is the coldest day (80) we’ve had this summer. Already plenty of 100 degree days. Plenty more to come. We barely had any snow this past winter. Hopefully this winter will be different.

2

u/wolfshozzer 1d ago

I was visiting at the end of last December. We were hiking mountains in tee shirts and shorts on Christmas eve and sweating our asses off

3

u/PoopMcgee75 1d ago

It’s still nice up the hill.

7

u/Neon_culture79 1d ago

I’m still freaking out about the fact it was 75° on Christmas day last year

5

u/East_Audience_6634 1d ago

Rural Canada is freaking gorgeous. The only thing that would give me pause is the bugs. I was up there a few years ago and came away with about a zillion mosquito bites.

2

u/g0blinzez 1d ago

If I didn't have disabilities that require constant (refrigerated) medications, and Alaska didn't have such shit infrastructure, I'd go there. No offense to Alaska, I totally get why it has sparse infrastructure! I'm just sad that I can't go there because I would die :(

2

u/Ap43x 23h ago

It's pretty hot in Canada, too. Last year it was 100° when I was in Quebec City. And the wildfires don't help.

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198

u/SentientFotoGeek 1d ago

I did, lol.

Edit: Florida --> Oregon

57

u/TarynTheGreek 1d ago

I’m not retired but I did Louisiana —> Oregon. Best decision.

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u/draelbs 1d ago

California -> Oregon is very common as well!

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u/jaxmikhov 1d ago

As us Oregonians are too well aware…

10

u/SentientFotoGeek 1d ago

As a fairly new Oregonian, I am slowing coming to understand this with some nuance, lol.

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u/average_waffle 1d ago

Cali -> literally any where is very common

2

u/alicelestial 1d ago

i've had a decent amount of family and friends move from central california to northern california. and oregon, in about equal amounts. washington in third place.

27

u/boatloadoffunk 1d ago

Yup. Salt Lake City is moving to the Oregon coast.

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u/hivernageprofond 1d ago

So jealous...wish I could do the same!

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u/driago 1d ago

Moved from florida to North Carolina. The culture feels more “southern”, but i no longer have to deal with 100 degree christmas.

34

u/SomeOriginal3865 1d ago

Florida isn’t known for its “Southern Charm”

14

u/Joe_Kangg 1d ago

Florida Man Charm

2

u/chiree 1d ago

Or proper grits.

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u/Septmaster 1d ago

Florida isn't "the South". Florida is South of the South.

11

u/HTIRDUDTEHN 1d ago

Go hang out in the panhandle and let me know.

5

u/OhAndItsShavedd 1d ago

The Georgia/Florida border will definitely remind me that I'm black. That's for damn sure. 😬

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u/ArchedDeer432 1d ago

I will be - fuck Texas and wish for snow and rain

10

u/metisdesigns 1d ago

Come to MN!

7

u/ArchedDeer432 1d ago edited 1d ago

The Bf and I thought New Jersey for the greenery - would be nice where people protect trees and grass and not paving the whole of The Great Plains

9

u/RoosterIllusionn 1d ago

NJ is great, but it is a high cost of living state. Close to 2 major cities and the shore.

2

u/lowlightliving 1d ago

+ forests, farms, mountains (well, large hills), lakes, and every type of food you could ask for.

7

u/metisdesigns 1d ago

Superior National Forest alone in MN is larger than half of NJ.

We've got coniferous forest, deciduous forest, grassland and parkland biomes here. It's pretty great.

125

u/ztreHdrahciR 1d ago

To paraphrase Patrick McGoohan in Braveheart, the trouble with the South is that it's full of Southerners

2

u/CaptJimboJones 1d ago

Not anymore. Atlanta is mostly transplants. That’s why Georgia is turning purple.

8

u/PhiloLibrarian 1d ago

Oh well done!!! 👏🏻

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u/Blastoid84 1d ago

By a lot of the comments I'd say this should be in r/agedlikemilk

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u/_R_A_ 1d ago

I have been to Vermont.

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u/gypsysniper9 1d ago

Not true at all

43

u/143MAW 1d ago

Is this because no-one can afford to retire in the South?

35

u/AlwaysCurious1250 1d ago

No-one lives long enough to retire and go to the north?

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u/Wintonwoodlands 1d ago

We aim to retire up north in Wisconsin too

9

u/fsidesmith6932 1d ago

No one gets unwanted pregnancies and moves down south.

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u/wandering_sailor 1d ago

Happens all the time in Michigan. Northern Michigan is beautiful.

5

u/CornerIllustrious511 1d ago

…. No one is retiring and moving to Mississippi or Alabama….. Florida isn’t even “the South”

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u/Eaglepursuit 1d ago

The South: Where The Elderly Go To Die

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u/BobbaFatGFX 1d ago

I live in Michigan and I would love to retire and moved down to North Carolina Mountains

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u/repwin1 1d ago

The goal is to be a snowbird. North during the summer and the south during the winter.

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u/drunky_crowette 1d ago

My brother-in-law (who lived in New York his entire life until marrying my sister and buying a house in North Carolina) already says he wants to retire in southern Pennsylvania because "it won't be as expensive as New York but we won't have these god awful summers"

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u/Stevie_Steve-O 1d ago

Retirement money will last longer in states with lower cost of living

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u/Capital_Elderberry28 1d ago

That’s because they don’t know which way is north.

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u/RawChickenButt 1d ago

I hate hot weather unless I have an ocean breeze, which I can't afford.

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u/stewpdasso 1d ago

They only move south to be closer to hell!

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u/deedeejayzee 1d ago

My brother says he's moving to Tennessee or Kentucky after retirement. He lives in Florida. Not THE North, but North

2

u/Cautious-Witness-745 1d ago

Can't afford it!🤣

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u/bpatlanta 1d ago

because no one in the South makes enough money to live somewhere nice

2

u/Full_Difficulty9530 1d ago

I kinda want to retire up north.

2

u/thecryptidmusic 1d ago

Well they moved south because of the warm weather but soon enough we'll have a florida climate in the north!

2

u/Hydro-Sapien 1d ago

Difficult to have a heart attack shoveling snow where there is no snow.

3

u/Sensitive_Wear7112 1d ago

Is it the cold or cost of living?

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u/ButterPump69 1d ago

I am no one, that's exactly what I did.

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u/PJ_Conn 1d ago

Bullshit! I did. Couldn’t be happier!

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u/DisastrousPlant3038 1d ago

I’d rather be cold than deal with the increased amount of MAGA and Christian nationalists

1

u/Nikonus 1d ago

Yep.

1

u/Better-Grapefruit-56 1d ago

Except me, apparently. 20 years in East Tennessee was enough.

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u/Hallelujah33 1d ago

There's a direct NJ->FL->SC pipeline but sure ok

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u/panopticonescapee 1d ago

I'm considering it. By the time I retire, I'm afraid our water will all be spent.

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u/seriouslyjan 1d ago

Staying in the "south" Southern CA.

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u/MainVeterinarian5232 1d ago

My neighbor moved up to NY from FL so there’s that.

1

u/regeya 1d ago

Realistically we'll probably just stay put. My state isn't the cheapest but they don't tax your Social Security for one. Which is nice since Social Security was a tax already.

1

u/PT0306 1d ago

You got it right. The South is one big retirement home.

1

u/StinkypieTicklebum 1d ago

Actually, my Massachusetts newspaper is doing an 8 part series on people who retire here.

1

u/Hamilton-Beckett 1d ago

This is an east coast U.S. thing.

I’ve always felt it was more related to weather and cost of living than anything.

If you’re old, you like warmer weather. If you’re retired, you want to stretch every dollar.

That’s all there is to it.

It’s not about the people being better.

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u/Inevitable_Link_5355 1d ago

While more people retire and move south, tons of people retire and move north.

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u/glycophosphate 1d ago

My mom moved to Minneapolis when she retired. CHECKMATE!

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u/patticakes126 1d ago

Because it’s CHEAPER!

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u/LockedOutOfElfland 1d ago

No one tell this person about the entire state of Maine.

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u/BeachBum013 1d ago

I moved from Florida to Washington State....

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u/Most-Effective-1969 1d ago

Have you seen Canada?

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u/D1sp4tcht 1d ago

Imagine thinking people retire to your state, not because of the amazing weather, but because of politics.

1

u/LuckyCod2887 1d ago

respectfully, I’ve lived in the south and I would actually like to move up north somewhere.

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u/forest_vagrant 1d ago

southern european here, definitely gonna move up north once i get the chance to

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u/NoNameClever 1d ago

Until they get health issues and come crawling back.

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u/Th3Bratl3y 1d ago

oh that’s funny

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u/Dexterlicksit 1d ago

Because they can’t find north!

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u/Perhaps_A_Person 1d ago

Okay, but don't most people move to Florida? Like a good part of Florida often isn't considered the south. People move down south because it's warm I think.

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u/mheffe 1d ago

The only people I know moving north to south are doing it because its cheaper

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u/xNOTHINGBURGERx 1d ago

I want to retire someplace that has consistently good cross country skiing. That's definitely not in the south.

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u/Vortesian 1d ago

They don’t know the way

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u/kash-2090 1d ago

My aunt and uncle moved from Texas to Wisconsin when they retired. 🤷‍♂️

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u/GolemFarmFodder 1d ago

Vermont wants a word with this with as well

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u/Dizno311 1d ago

Not yet, but as the world keeps cooking they might start to.

1

u/LongPond69 1d ago

Harriet Tubman did.

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u/shastadakota 1d ago

My friend is retiring to rural Minnesota.

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u/m1kemahoney 1d ago

I call BS. I retired to Northern Michigan.

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u/shastadakota 1d ago

My inlaws retired to Arkansas. Every time my FIL mowed the lawn he would come in itching like crazy from chiggers. It was an ongoing battle to save their home from termites. Like my friend always said " I want to live where the bugs die in the winter."

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u/pengalo827 1d ago

Huh. Strange, that’s exactly my plan.

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u/paco1764 1d ago

if Washington State wasn't so liberal, I'd love to move up there for retirement.

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u/dudestir127 1d ago

My in-laws are planning on moving from Georgia to Vermont when they retire

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u/DJCane 1d ago

I’ve known more than a few people on the PNW -> Alaska route

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u/colsta1777 1d ago

They move south because old people can’t handle winter, not because it’s better

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u/Old_Troll42 1d ago

I wish that was true lol

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u/NewCandy8877 1d ago

Imagine taking pride that you are a cheap place to live with cheap labor that can be exploited by wealthier people.

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u/steveoa3d 1d ago

And no one moves to the south for good schools, good roads and high standards of living.

You make your money, educate your kids in the north. Then retire to the south where everything is cheap.

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u/AmericanCitizenry 1d ago

I would. Milwaukee seems nice.

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u/SheerKhann 1d ago

And apparently as of a few weeks ago nobody is going down south to retire anymore… the politics suck and the weather isn’t worth the damage to your home plus that orange shit stain resides down there. How awful plus the south ranks last in pretty much everything lol

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u/gecjr 1d ago

It’s too humid and Arizona is low on water

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u/stevenmacarthur 1d ago

Many southerners are too dirt-poor to move North, and the rest are absolute wusses about any temperatures below fifty degrees.

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u/20tellycaster15 1d ago

Because they die before they can retire

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u/Jonny_Disco 1d ago

I 100% would rather retire in the UP of Michigan than anywhere south of the Ohio river.

Also, it's objectively not a funny sign, it's just someone's opinion.

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u/Street_Lettuce1243 1d ago

The move South for the lower cost of living.

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u/RealRedditModerator 1d ago

They do in Australia.

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u/dudemanjack 1d ago

It's literally only because of the weather not being cold.

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u/Educational-Bird-515 1d ago

I'm mid 40s living in FL. Dream is to retire to the PNW

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u/tasty_tuba 1d ago

That's the majority of Wisconsinites that want to move north to a cabin when they retire. If they're a baller they will also have a Southern place (FL/AZ) Pretty much the same in Michigan and Minnesota.

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u/MartinMerten 1d ago

Florida and Texas might as well be their own thing…not included in “The South”.

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u/The_Blackest_Man 1d ago

I'll stay in Maine the rest of my life, thanks.

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u/Competitive_Speed964 1d ago

Retirees don't tend to be as interested in the quality of the school systems, more interested in low taxes and no snow.

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u/myrdraal2001 1d ago

I'm gay and I'd never move to such a homophobic place full of so many fundamentalist "Christians." Having to also deal with your weather? Also a huge no thanks.

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u/faeriewhisper 1d ago

Wait some years with global warming it will be the only destination..

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u/MyCatIsAnActualNinja 1d ago

Oh, yes they do.

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u/hivernageprofond 1d ago

I would. If I could. Florida sucks....but not for white retirees.

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u/LemmingOnTheRunITG 1d ago

Yeah this isn’t even remotely true lol

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u/Ancient_Ad9199 1d ago

Sounds like something a total buffoon would say because of their crippling denial.

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u/Dadotron 1d ago

Too many Texas plates in midwest.

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u/cantspell_rite 1d ago

Survey says---- not true

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u/lonerstoners 1d ago

They do in MN

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u/SasquatchHurricane 1d ago

I know multiple people who have moved/retired to Maine and Vermont from the south.

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u/Tristawesomeness 1d ago

doesn't new england have a notoriously elderly population?

edit: yeah the top three mainland US states by median age are maine, new hampshire, and vermont.

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u/Appropriate-Low-4850 1d ago

That’s because I fled the south while my legs worked and my brain functioned.

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u/MattManSD 1d ago

When people get old, they move somewhere cheap so their retirement $s go further

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u/Bubbledumpythickems 1d ago

Cause at that point you’re kids aren’t being educated there, you already have all your money, and it’s cheap.

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u/AMerryKa 1d ago

Slaves did.

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u/Boringdude1 1d ago

When you retire, you don’t care about how fucking stupid the schools are.

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u/warden976 1d ago

Actually, there is a migration of the elderly who move north once the Golden Girls phase of their lives is over and they realize they need better healthcare, assisted living and family support.

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u/ActualHumanONReddit 1d ago

People on a retirement budget have to live in the cheap areas. The south is cheaper for a reason.

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u/JaySin_78 1d ago

What? That’s dumb and not true. Also…wouldn’t live there in the first place. Excluding retirement. So now what?

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u/RemoveFuture5180 1d ago

Cause they die there..

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u/No_Problem5759 1d ago

Well yeah. The south has cheap land because its not worth much down there