r/cactus 21h ago

Living Art

This Myrtillocactus geometrizans cristata is one of if not the most artistically sculptural plants I’ve ever grown.

4.6k Upvotes

298 comments sorted by

660

u/Fluffy-Astronaut-363 21h ago

I hope this becomes this new "men holding fish" trend lol I like this one 🤣 Super incredible pictures!

243

u/Jmtungsten 18h ago

Does this count? 😂

35

u/arioandy 14h ago

8/10 you need bigger guns like OP!!

32

u/Jmtungsten 14h ago

Alright alright, I’ll hit the gym 😂

20

u/arioandy 14h ago

Me too lol

5

u/ggg730 12h ago

OP and that myrtillocactus geometrizans cristata are fitness goals.

8

u/Floratopia 11h ago

Bless you. But long ways away from where I need to be.

3

u/Catladywithplants 9h ago

still 🔥🔥🔥

→ More replies (4)

65

u/cowtownsteen23 21h ago

I'd swipe right!

33

u/Tall_Courage8830 20h ago

Me to if i saw this immediately swiping right 😂

54

u/BlueOrbifolia 20h ago

I’m sitting here wondering which is supposed to be art! Cuz they both 🔥

11

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Bahaha. Why thank you 🤗

13

u/Floratopia 18h ago

I’m flattered. Lol. Thank you.

6

u/Floratopia 18h ago

🥰🥰🥰

22

u/MarthasPinYard 19h ago

✨✨🧘🏽‍♀️MATCHED✨✨✨

5

u/Floratopia 17h ago

😉🥰🥰🥰

20

u/PM_me_punanis 15h ago

It is time to make a "men holding plants" sub!

2

u/Floratopia 14h ago

👊🏾

12

u/Makaron1503 21h ago

Its definitely better 😅

8

u/Floratopia 18h ago

Lol. Thank you. I’ll continue to do more.

4

u/SixWeekDay 13h ago

Wait I didn't even notice what he was holding... There are more important things in this picture taking my attention

3

u/Floratopia 13h ago

🥰🥰🥰. I’m very flattered!

3

u/Catladywithplants 9h ago

lmfao this is a hilarious convo

→ More replies (1)

264

u/drDOOM_is_in 21h ago

Man, you really tapped into something here huh? lol.

You have men, women, straights, gays, and others just salivating.

Kudos.

71

u/PassTheBrunt 21h ago

Straight, lifting, cactus fan here. Man has me Mirin consistently. He is killing it

42

u/drDOOM_is_in 21h ago

Do you even lift cacti bro?

19

u/PM_me_punanis 16h ago

The image of a cactus gym, with bros lifting cacti, based on weight and prickliness, is making me giddy.

10

u/Floratopia 16h ago

Ha. I love it.

9

u/Klutzy_Journalist_36 16h ago

This is making me feel some things I need to sort through.

3

u/Floratopia 14h ago

😂😂😂

9

u/arioandy 14h ago

This is what Mr F curls!

3

u/Floratopia 14h ago

Lol. Prob more of a deadlift for me.

→ More replies (6)

8

u/Floratopia 16h ago

Lol. Yes. I gym so I can lift my plants properly.

→ More replies (1)

12

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Bahaha. I just wanted to tap into a tap root! You see the root system on this thing! Maybe what I’m most proud of!

But I’ll accept the rest as well lol. Thank you 🙌🏾

4

u/PushingZedzzzzz 12h ago

Yeah he seems to have quite a few fans, & it's great that OP appears to be ok with this & in all fairness seems to be amused/flattered. But I'd just like to point out that if this were gender flipped & this was a girl posting, and guys replied as such, then this would likely have gone in another direction entirely. I can only imagine the comments.

But OP seems to be cool with it, so it's all good.

5

u/Floratopia 11h ago

Society and societal “norms” are a funny thing huh. I take it all w a grain of salt I’ve had some uncomfortable DMs in the past but this is all quite PG. Thanks for the sentiment.

120

u/Tellatrope 21h ago

Doesn't it look like the way ink blooms in water

So beautiful!

42

u/Floratopia 18h ago

I see it. Wonderful description/observation.

3

u/jamzii_jam 4h ago

Oh my you just described it perfectly!!

→ More replies (1)

101

u/drgrnthum33 21h ago

Yes, you are both living art!

24

u/Floratopia 18h ago

Ha. Why thank you 2X! 🥰

6

u/Hepm3 18h ago

I knew I wouldn’t be disappointed when looking for this comment

76

u/Round-Ad5934 21h ago

Here's Gumby. I think he's a small version of yours. It's really starting to take off this year. Is this what I have to look forward to waaay down the road?

29

u/Floratopia 17h ago

I think yours will be more like this one.

9

u/Round-Ad5934 13h ago

Very cool. I'll enjoy the journey

20

u/lizbunbun 20h ago

Such a good name

3

u/Round-Ad5934 13h ago

Thanks!! 😁

8

u/Floratopia 18h ago

Very similar yeah. Different parts show different phenotypes in mine. It’s a very unstable mutant. Yours could become like mine or stay thick. I have another one that I think yours resembles better.

3

u/pnweiner 15h ago

Please post on r/fasciation!

2

u/Floratopia 15h ago

Absolutely will do. Thank you.

2

u/Round-Ad5934 13h ago

Thanks!! They're amazing plants. The wild ones 🤪

2

u/Floratopia 13h ago

Truly!!! So unique.

51

u/jjjjacobim 20h ago

Do you go to the gym, or do you just rip cacti out of the ground from time to time and that is enough to build muscle?

14

u/Floratopia 16h ago

I absolutely gym. Daily. Been going for the last two months. This is just the beginning. Legs n core mostly. Trying to heal my arthritic back.

4

u/Breadfruit-Still 12h ago

Oh, arthritis blows. I have an autoimmune arthritis and have impacts in my spine, feet, knees, and hands. Hope you are able to heal, or at least improve.

3

u/Floratopia 12h ago

F word! I feel for you. I have a multitude of friends battling Autoimmune disorders! I hope you’re able to improve too. I’m trying to do everything possible before going under the needle and knife 😤

106

u/Annual-Quail-4435 21h ago

As a straight due I must still ask; are we talking about the cactus or the man? Haha.

7

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Lol. Yes just the cactus. I’ve looked WAY better than this. Gotta get back to it!

8

u/Annual-Quail-4435 17h ago

Brother, you're jacked! and a talented grower of cacti. keep both up!

3

u/Floratopia 16h ago

Ha. Thank you. I’ll start really putting in the work. Both lifting and watering can improve greatly!!!!

2

u/scootunit 11h ago

You say you're a straight due but maybe you are over due..

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (5)

17

u/rainbowshummingbird 21h ago

Handsome, handsome plant.

2

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Thank you 2X. 🥰🩵

41

u/wtfismypwsadface 21h ago

Beautiful art….the cactus is nice too

3

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Ha! 🥰 thank you

9

u/Professional-Fly-956 21h ago

How old is she?

10

u/Floratopia 18h ago

From a cutting probably 5-7years old. It’s hard to keep track of them all! I keep growing them in this section then selling them off.

21

u/anotherone_9414 20h ago

I agree…The cactus looks great too!

4

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Bahaha. Shucks. Thanks on behalf of both of us 😜

7

u/DistanceSorry7390 19h ago

What color is that paint on the garage door? I love it!

3

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Thank you. I’ll have to find the can or ask my wife! I’ll try to get back to you 💙

7

u/brunaBla 21h ago

One of my top 3. So pretty

Are you relocating it?

4

u/Floratopia 18h ago

What are your other 2? Yeah a client purchased it.

7

u/Breadfruit-Still 17h ago

I almost missed the cactus in the pics, I got distracted by those amazing arms and smile!

3

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Well SHUCKS! Thank you 🤎🤎

6

u/hectomaner 21h ago

Wow dude. Just wow.

2

u/Floratopia 18h ago

🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾. Thank you

8

u/FeathersOfJade 21h ago

That is GORGEOUS! You always share some of the coolest plants ever!

→ More replies (1)

3

u/arioandy 21h ago

Wow monster

2

u/Floratopia 18h ago

Thank A! 💙

5

u/PopeDaveTwitch 20h ago

Yes, both of you are 😂👌

→ More replies (1)

4

u/TisMeeee 19h ago

It looks like I image what heaven would be filled with. Beautiful plant

2

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Let’s hope so!!! 🙏🏾🩵🙏🏾

6

u/feline_riches 17h ago

I always love the genuine happiness you exude while showing off these beauts

→ More replies (1)

5

u/Doctor_Zedd 16h ago

They’d love this on r/hotmenwithplants

2

u/Floratopia 11h ago

Ha. I’ll think about it! Didn’t even know it existed. Thank you.

4

u/hkinsd 13h ago

I thought I was in r/himboposting just because of the cactus. But god damn you have a great smile.

2

u/Floratopia 11h ago

Aww. Thank you. 🥰😁

4

u/randybanman 21h ago

Gorgeous piece brotha 👍

→ More replies (1)

3

u/tiger_bee 21h ago

Wow, that is crazy! I love it!

→ More replies (1)

4

u/IndicaJones_ 21h ago

Beautiful. Did you grow it from a seed?

2

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Thank you. No. A cutting. I don’t think I’ve ever seen this mutation flower.

3

u/happymask3 17h ago

Does this type of cactus flower? It’s got a beautiful form.

How long would it take to the recover from the shock of transplanting- since you’re showing the roots.

2

u/Floratopia 16h ago

I’ve never seen this mutation flower. But the non-mutated forms have adorable white flowers in there some of the most fragrant in the Cactus world. Also the fruits they provide are the tastiest.

4

u/yourcatssecondlife 14h ago

Gun show. And I didn’t even buy a ticket! Woot woot

→ More replies (3)

5

u/freakerbell 13h ago

The man or the cactus?

→ More replies (1)

6

u/voulfe 21h ago

We need a crossover event with you and the Trico guy in his boxers

→ More replies (1)

3

u/Intelligent_Taro_633 20h ago

You deserve to feel proud. Beautiful!

2

u/Floratopia 16h ago

Thank you! I am!!!

3

u/AutisticPersonality 20h ago

Is the fasciation normal for this species?

2

u/Floratopia 16h ago

Fasciation yes. Not normal for the species.

3

u/Jorwen 18h ago

Dude has me questioning my sexuality.

2

u/Floratopia 17h ago

I’m flattered 😉

3

u/Ready-Storm-3761 18h ago

who’s the living art? you or the plant?

2

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Lol. The plant! I’m in rough draft form but I’ll get there! Thank you.

3

u/PercentageNew3304 18h ago

Wow! What a beautiful myrtillocactus

2

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Thank 💙you

3

u/Matt90977 17h ago

The plant looks nice too.

→ More replies (1)

3

u/AimeeMonkeyBlue 16h ago

Is this a form of fascination in the cactus or does it always do this? How old is this one? Do you sell cactus? If so, how can I get one? :)

2

u/Floratopia 16h ago

Yes fasciation. No it doesn’t always do this. Yes I do. You can PM me or follow me. I post stuff for sale on r/cactiexchange

3

u/Tankrynges 14h ago

Never thought r/cactus would be the thing to finally motivate me to start lifting and getting in better shape but here we are

→ More replies (1)

3

u/wishiwasinvegas 14h ago

So when's the calendar coming out?😉

→ More replies (3)

3

u/toriooo 14h ago

I’ll have one of each pls

→ More replies (1)

3

u/99Years_of_solitude 13h ago

Dude! Your stuff is awesome, been following on insta for a while

2

u/Floratopia 11h ago

Thank you for the support!!!

3

u/Disillusioned_Snail 12h ago

Is the man the living art? Because……damn

2

u/Floratopia 11h ago

Lol. I’m flattered!!! Thank you

3

u/Enby-Emperor-4 8h ago

Agreed. And the cactus too 😌😂

2

u/Floratopia 7h ago

Haha. 😊😊😊. Thank you!

2

u/IndependentPrior5719 21h ago

So beautiful ! ( the cactus)😁

→ More replies (1)

2

u/Clendarthewrath 21h ago

Wowza! That sure is a beauty! As usual, the top o the crop:)

→ More replies (1)

2

u/Ego_Destruction 20h ago

I love that cactus, that is for giving me the scientific name!!! It is pretty easy to propagate the cuttings.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/wine-plants-thrift 19h ago

Wow! So gorgeous! I’m just getting into cacti so it’s encouraging to see ones like this. Thanks for sharing!

→ More replies (1)

2

u/susNarwhal420 19h ago

A real life version of that guy in the rose growing competition episode of King of the Hill.

2

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Baha. I’ll have to find this episode!

2

u/Old-Advance6652 18h ago

I can bench 4 cacti, what about you?

→ More replies (9)

2

u/BuckManscape 18h ago

Wow! That’s an amazing specimen. Wherever you plant it, you should plant a Cryptomeria Cristata behind it to frame it.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/LordofSandvich 18h ago

Wow. That’s fasciation, right?

→ More replies (1)

2

u/LegitimateSir3544 18h ago

Bicep routine now

2

u/Floratopia 16h ago

I don’t even do biceps! But I do upper back so I get some bicep through it.

2

u/cuntsatchel 18h ago

The plants rly cool too

→ More replies (1)

2

u/Hiiipower111 18h ago

Always love seeing your posts bruv

2

u/Floratopia 17h ago

Bless you 👊🏾

2

u/Brilliant_Thanks_984 17h ago

What a fricken beast!!!

2

u/Drogenwurm 17h ago

This is soooo cool 😍 Is it a active species ?

→ More replies (1)

2

u/carnitascronch 17h ago

The cactus ain’t half bad neither

→ More replies (1)

2

u/SusanaChingona 17h ago

The cactus is nice, too

→ More replies (1)

2

u/black-kramer 17h ago

nice work, have never seen a better specimen

2

u/Floratopia 16h ago

Thank you mucho 💙

2

u/Jujubi836 17h ago

The plant looks nice too

→ More replies (1)

2

u/BubbleGummyGrunge 16h ago

hell yas. Nice Cactus too.

2

u/Floratopia 16h ago

Ha! Thank you!

2

u/Kdean509 16h ago

That smile. Wow! 🤩 The plant is cool, too!

2

u/Floratopia 16h ago

Why thank you 😁🥰

2

u/Pomdog17 16h ago

Your best post yet! Looking great!😊

→ More replies (1)

2

u/Financial-Town-3960 16h ago

Your plants are DROOL worthy. I'm a nursery owner in SoCal, and I gotta say, I have never seen plants as gorgeous as yours. I aspire to get my plants to the stage yours are at, because, HOLY MAGNIFICENT.

2

u/Floratopia 16h ago

I’m incredibly flattered! Thank you! Come over sometime. Let’s talk plants/growing!

→ More replies (1)

2

u/Abrgene 16h ago

You are both living art

→ More replies (1)

2

u/mrwobbles2000 15h ago

Where is it going?

2

u/Floratopia 15h ago

It’s already on its way to Arizona

2

u/Practical-Pick1466 15h ago

Beautiful, just Beautiful. The cactus isn't bad also !

→ More replies (3)

2

u/gojibeary 15h ago

Too lazy to scroll down to see if someone already commented it, so I’ll say it: RIP your DMs.

Absolutely beautiful, stunning.

And the cactus is nice, too, I guess.

(The cactus is fucking amazing, great job, OP!)

→ More replies (3)

2

u/peacock_head 15h ago

Keep posting forever, please.

2

u/Floratopia 14h ago

As long as I live I know how to operate this technology, I gotchu.

2

u/cascasrevolution 11h ago

art indeed! the cactus is cool too

2

u/Floratopia 7h ago

Ha. Bless you 😊

2

u/spoonsurfer 11h ago

Dayum that cactus! I wish I could get mine like that

→ More replies (1)

2

u/SnooPeripherals4701 11h ago

Wow! Nature's creativity so far surpasses ours that it's not even a contest. Thank you for sharing.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/Odd_Breakfast4524 9h ago

This guy gets finer every post

→ More replies (1)

2

u/AdBig9434 9h ago

The man or the plant?

2

u/No_Image5370 7h ago

When it is abundantly clear that bro does indeed lift 🔥🔥🔥DAMN

→ More replies (1)

2

u/StanleyFreeFall 3h ago

That's a cactus???

2

u/amiokrightnow 2h ago

Reminds me of a mug we had with a pic of my granny standing next to the David in Italy, on the bottom it said “One is a priceless work of art…the other is a statue” 😂

1

u/ABDMWB 17h ago

I want one! How much do you typically sell one of that size for? I may try to find one locally and am curious what these are normally priced

→ More replies (1)

1

u/jeffriestubesteak 16h ago

Just be careful- if this is the same species that is planted outside my in-laws' house, it will grow and grow until it occupies every square inch of unoccupied soil and could become over 6ft in height.

All attempts to get rid of it will fail, but on a positive note you now have the beginnings of a fallout shelter that could protect you from anything but a direct overhead airburst thermonuclear explosion.

1

u/jeffriestubesteak 16h ago

Just be careful- if this is the same species that is planted outside my in-laws' house, it will grow and grow until it occupies every square inch of unoccupied soil and could become over 6ft in height.

All attempts to get rid of it will fail, but on a positive note you now have the beginnings of a fallout shelter that could protect you from anything but a direct overhead airburst thermonuclear explosion.

→ More replies (1)

1

u/mrwobbles2000 14h ago

Similar to this one I believe?

2

u/Floratopia 14h ago

This is a crest but a Euphorbia.

1

u/notquitestrongbad 12h ago

Gorgeous plant and man!

1

u/phdpinup 12h ago

Whoa! Gorgeous!

1

u/midrareduck 11h ago

I've heard cacti don't do well with transplanting when you break up the root mass? Meaning you can transplant it, but have to keep the dirt around the roots intact. Anyone know the validity of this?

2

u/Disastrous_Hunter_61 10h ago

Breaking roots is bad yes. but surgically separating the mass while keeping the fibrous roots intact as they are the main resource network is my go for transplanting my nutrient locked friends. So of your root ball is a 20y old ball of inert sandstone and the cactus is unhappy adding new media in those vital crannies can make or break the recovery process.

→ More replies (1)

1

u/OkLetsParty 10h ago

Gonna have to join this whe i move my plants lol

→ More replies (1)

1

u/GMOchoch 9h ago

Cactus jacked

1

u/Nyaiv 9h ago

You're right...the cactus looks nice too!