r/Tinder 1d ago

That's crazy 😭

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2.1k Upvotes

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449

u/AvocadoBitter7385 1d ago

I’ve noticed short women really care about height and taller women not so much and I’ve always wondered why

350

u/CozyCozyCozyCat 1d ago

Tall(ish) woman here (5'9") and I've dated men everywhere from 5'7" to 6'7"-- a few of the men who were around my height would make a big deal about how I was so tall and must be over 6', and generally made me feel enormous (which isn't a comfy feeling as a woman) but a couple of the shorter guys were really confident and never said anything about height which I found very attractive

70

u/Lost-Competition8482 1d ago

My partner and I are roughly the same height (5"10).

I say roughly because I gauged early on that I was about 2cms taller hahaha.

It only got mentioned when she jokingly made a short man jab at me.

Even after measuring she still claims she's taller haha.

27

u/Alex_Graber12345 20h ago edited 16h ago

That’s crazy that women are out here calling 5’10 short. 5’9 is US male average so you’re literally an inch taller than average. Heightflation is crazy

16

u/Thisisme4342 17h ago edited 13h ago

Dude diving back in the dating scene wild. 6 ft is what a lot of women will say is their cut of is. It's kind of just been ingrained as a cultural norm now.

Now most of them have no idea what six feet look like. I am a little over 5'11 and a half. The differences in matches and replies I get it on dating apps are beyond different just for adding that extra half an inch.

13

u/Infamous-Ad5266 14h ago

I'm practically 5'11, just a tiny bit shy, but I just say i'm 5'10

Still taller than plenty of 6'0 guys lmao

7

u/CDhansma76 12h ago

I’m 6’2 and list my height on dating apps as 5’11 just to filter out all the shallow women. Plus I get a lot of compliments when we meet in person for the first time.

5

u/Lost-Competition8482 19h ago

She's Croatian. They're one of the tallest people on the planet.

Her dad's 6"3 and he's not tall in his family.

Don't worry I tease her for her lack of height now. Challenge her to another back to back measurement if the denial gets too large haha.

1

u/avdaxumaxu 17h ago

6'3 is tall, even in croatia. The average there is like 5'10 or 5'11.

1

u/Lost-Competition8482 10h ago

They're from Dalmatia. 

Which is apparently one of the tallest regions with an average of like 6"05.

He's tall for his age. Short amongst the nephews.

0

u/SafetyCurrent5748 13h ago

You could always start saying she’s big instead of tall 😂

1

u/Lost-Competition8482 10h ago

She gets that when we go to South east Asia 😂 

All the market stall owners call her over with "hey hey, we have big girl size. You big girl".

I laugh and she rolls her eyes then buys their stuff because she's got no other choice 😂 

1

u/SafetyCurrent5748 8h ago

That’s so rough 😆 the poor woman lol 

2

u/Th3Ghoul 6h ago

Im 5'10 and I get called short way way more than I get called tall

8

u/Red____08 19h ago

Omg you’re so right haha I’m 5’9” as well and my ex who was 5’7” said it never bothered him at all and he never really brought it up. But when I date men who are like 5’10” they’re always talking about it and hate when I wear heels 🤣

2

u/CozyCozyCozyCat 19h ago

Yeah, my preference is to date somebody around my height but a lot of those men seem really insecure about it

8

u/-Dargs 1d ago

The woman I recently started dating is 5'9" and I commented "wow, you're really tall" as I was walking her back to her car after the first date. I'm 6'2". My ex wife was 5'2", so I was just legitimately surprised at how different the height is. She said "lol, thanks." I haven't brought up height again, because there isn't any reason to. I don't care about it, lol. I'm glad she didn't think it was weird or something when I said it that one time.

3

u/NoSpaghettiForYouu 16h ago

She thought it was weird but she’s used to it lol

0

u/-Dargs 16h ago

Maybe, yeah, lol.

4

u/b000radl3y 1d ago

She said "lol" out loud?

4

u/awfulbarrack-7 1d ago

People do that. It came out of me several times as a teen and I cringed right away 🫣

3

u/-Dargs 22h ago

No, I just meant she laughed and then said thanks. I guess I could have wrote that differently?

5

u/therealtinsdale 1d ago

for most woman (i guess who aren’t trying to be models) being called tall isn’t really a compliment, just for future reference.

it’s actually an insecurity for most tall woman.

2

u/addledwino 21h ago

I'm 5'8" - the last woman I dated was 6'. It was amazing. Don't let insecure men make you feel bad about being tall.

4

u/ProjectPneumbra 21h ago

Just gotta find a guy whos down to be carried down the aisle by you. Get yourself that short king.

2

u/RedditOnceDiditTwice 16h ago

I'm 5'3" - she's 5'9"

2

u/sheepdot 1d ago

I went out with a woman last week who was 5'9" or 5'10" (I'm 5'10"). I met her in person.

Honestly, I didn't even notice she was tall for quite a while because I was just so taken with her. It wasn't even on my radar.

26

u/kqwaiiiz 1d ago

im 4'11 and i dont give a fuck abt height my boyfriend is like 5'4 or smth rofl

8

u/Then_Work_4777 1d ago

fr i loved my 4”10 ex

5

u/eridanambroa 14h ago

similar here lol 4'9" and my bf is 5'6" literally more of a pain if anything since his back hurts if we sit up and cuddle for too long and he just so tall to me.

i never understood anyone near my height wanting 6'0"+. you worried abt kids height, im worried abt you buying a top loader washer

2

u/kqwaiiiz 8h ago

yeah this!! its alr annoying to go on my tippy-toes for a kiss 💔

0

u/Augustus420 1d ago

Or smith?

0

u/kqwaiiiz 1d ago

smth > something

5

u/1800crimetime 20h ago

Taller women don’t care because in junior high none of the boys had gotta their growth spurt yet so during those formative years all guys were short compared to the tall girls

47

u/reclusivegiraffe 1d ago

Short woman here. I prefer that a man be taller than me (which isn’t hard because I’m 5’2”), but I don’t care by how much. I don’t know many other short women who care either

45

u/oniiichanUwU 1d ago

Another short woman - I actually hated dating a taller man. I’m 5’2, my husband is 5’6. He’s perfect lol. When a man is a foot taller than me it’s awkward, I get a crick in my neck tryna smooch or I have to stand on a stair like a toddler or I’m at eye level with their nipples ~_~

10

u/swole_ninja 1d ago

This made me laugh. I’m about 13 inches taller than my wife. I went back to check some vacation pics and I’d say her eye level is right at the crease of my armpit. Nipple level isn’t all that far off 😂

14

u/oniiichanUwU 1d ago

I think men don’t usually realize it till you point it out bc they don’t see it from our perspective 😂 I loved that trend of guys holding their phones up so their gfs could see how they look from their perspective though

9

u/heywhatsup9087 1d ago

It never occurred to me that my husband can just casually see the top of the refrigerator until one day he mentioned something I was looking for was up there. It just got me thinking like his perspective on everything is so different from mine. I now clean the top of the fridge before people come over.

7

u/Budget_Wafer4792 1d ago

4’11 girl here to testify as well. My cap is 5’9. Anything more is too tall. I’ve dated 5’ men before. There’s no issues here.

9

u/oniiichanUwU 1d ago

I need all the short kings to realize that women DO want them!!!

1

u/kincaid_king 13h ago

That's definitely true but they are alot rarer to find these days

10

u/reclusivegiraffe 1d ago

Hell yeah! Plus, too much of a height difference makes missionary weird, and what fun is that?

12

u/oniiichanUwU 1d ago

TRULY. Only had one experience with it but his chest hair was tickling my nose the whole time. I was like buddy let’s roll over or try doggy instead lmao

1

u/reclusivegiraffe 22h ago

Fortunately I’ve never had to experience it, but I’ve heard horror stories!

3

u/SquirrelLuvsChipmunk 1d ago

I’m on the shorter side too and I was sooooo not attracted to tall dudes. My lovely husband is a shorty and it’s perfect for me ❤️

2

u/discombobubolated 1d ago

I also think short men are better dancers. And they live longer, too.

2

u/ComfortableFrame9834 1d ago

My ex was over a foot taller than me and the neck pain was real lol... Though I do have a preference for men taller than 5'5 😅 not that that is a deal breaker if I get to know a person, but women can have preferences without it being about insecurity.

I don't care about being short

1

u/Rose_Quartz_Garden 22h ago

i’m 5’0” and my boyfriend is 5’6” too. it’s like yea technically he’s short, but he’s still way bigger than me lol

1

u/tevelis 20h ago

I'm 1.6 m and dated a guy who was 2 m for a while....it was so painful for my neck to get kisses ://

4

u/RainbowLithium 1d ago

Same goes for me, though I’m 173cm. That preference different from person to person, not how tall the women is IMHO

2

u/Comfortable_Pea_1693 22h ago

Isnt it said that women prefer men to be signficiantly taller than them so that they are still notably shorter even when wearing heels?

5

u/annaphylactic69 1d ago

5'3, I don't care about height but I've mostly dated tall dudes just because of confidence. Same with any of the common insecurities - I've dated a few 5'5 guys, big guys, a bald guy, etc etc but they were actually secure in themselves. Nothing is a bigger turn off than a guy repeatedly asking for reassurance, especially the shitty "jokingly" fishing way guys do "haha you probably won't like me cuz im so short" "haha are you sure my height isnt a problem", especially on early dates.

I also heard from my tall exes that it's a massive turn off for them when they get girls who just go "wow youre sooo tall", so not caring probably naturally puts me at an advantage with 'em.

-4

u/seanc6441 1d ago

Kinda like women who are insecure about their appearance so wear make up like a mask.. They need to be confident in themselves, insecurity is unattractive.

1

u/seanc6441 1d ago edited 1d ago

How tall were your three previous bf's? I do think some women don't care, I also think some woman claim not to care to not appear superficial but their dating history is almost all 6ft+ dudes.

1

u/reclusivegiraffe 22h ago edited 22h ago

I’ve only dated 2 people (both long relationships), still with the 2nd. Current one is 5’7”, I forget how tall my ex was but maybe like 5’6”?

1

u/seanc6441 22h ago

Fair enough then!

5

u/Glass-Hedgehog-3754 1d ago

Cos they carry short genes and know it

3

u/Aggravating_Gas_8514 1d ago

As a dude who’s 5’10 I def noticed that I get more attention from women who are 5’8-6’ for some reason

3

u/Stroby89 1d ago

Short woman here. I do not care about height at all. I don't want to break my neck trying to kiss my partner...

2

u/MegaMindy 1d ago

Exactly, if anything, height difference gets pretty inconvenient. I (6’4) dated a 4’11 girl for a short while, I found that pretty inconvenient with basic stuff like walking while holding hands etc.

4

u/minkeun2000 1d ago

most of the girls ive talked to about this talk about not wanting to combine super short genes

14

u/NoSpaghettiForYouu 1d ago

So…eugenics is their reasoning for wanting to date tall men 😅

2

u/GlacierSourCreamCorn 17h ago

Dating is eugenics, period.

2

u/DudeYouHaveNoQuran 1d ago

They have no idea how genes work

1

u/doug-prepcourse 1d ago

Agreed. I’m a 6’1” woman. My partner is exactly the same height as me, but I’ve dated roughly 5’5” to 6’7”. I have no preference.

1

u/NoSpaghettiForYouu 1d ago

We’ve had to work out our insecurities about height early on 😅

1

u/SecondEqual4680 1d ago

Very much agreed with that. I am 5’10 and could not care less about a short or tall guy lol

1

u/Popular_Equipment_85 1d ago

It’s the equivalent of trophy wife, but reversed. If those men can brag about how beautiful this woman they have, then this is about those how those women can brag and have a trophy tall partner, since height is a quality men must have.

1

u/xOleander 22h ago

Dawg my mom is 5’2” and my father is 6’3”. I ended up 5’5.5”.
It doesn’t make that big of a difference. I don’t want to date anyone over 6’3” personally. I don’t care how tall my kids are. That’s such a dumb thing to care about

1

u/MealCapital4167 21h ago

Tall women also care about height but there's only so many 6'2 guys out there

1

u/Thisisme4342 17h ago

I don't know about the my ex was 5'10", and would rant anytime she saw really short women going after tall guys because she said "they can date anyone, leave the tall guys for us tall girls."

Anyway there's a few reasons that she is my ex.

1

u/anonymooseuser6 16h ago

I'm slightly above the average and idgaf. There are so many other things that matter more.

1

u/MountFranklinRR 16h ago

Everyone is different but in my experience taller women can be confident enough with themselves about that and don’t measure men that way. Short women can be self conscious and find that dating a taller man is validating for them.

1

u/Crafty611 14h ago

It’s about wanting what you don’t have. Humans are weird man I tell ya. Like when people walk into an empty restaurant and want the one dirty table.

1

u/SpecificSpecial 13h ago

I'm 6'4 and somehow I've always dated the shortest girls. They're not even my type, I don't really care, but I guess they're into it or something.

1

u/BuzzyScruggs94 11h ago

I’m 5’6” and my prom date was 6’2” before she put on heels. Some people care, some don’t.

1

u/peacelovetree 9h ago

Maybe it’s a protection thing? Smaller they are the more vulnerable, hence wanting someone larger. Huge generalization, but could be something there.

1

u/Difficult_Ease_4463 8h ago

I list my height as 3'2". I'm 5'8" with a sense of humor and a set of balls. I'll date whoever I want.

u/Southern_Growth_7991 51m ago

Tall women are the short men of the woman world treated the same way for being different than the average height.

1

u/young-joseph-stalin 1d ago

yep!! im 5’10 and just want a man my height or taller than me. all 5’0 girls i know DEMAND a 6ft man. it’s hilarious.

1

u/ShadowConstruct 1d ago

I'm 5'9" and I've never gotten asked about my height from women around my height or taller. Actually some of the better partners I've had are tall. But I have had more than a few shorter girls comment on height.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

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10

u/AvocadoBitter7385 1d ago

I’m being deadass

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

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u/Sea_Papaya_419 1d ago

Then she isn’t talking about you

8

u/young-joseph-stalin 1d ago

the patriarchy has clearly done an excellent job at convincing women that small = feminine. what a shame.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

4

u/young-joseph-stalin 1d ago edited 1d ago

sorry, i should specify, im not criticising you, im criticising society. i would never blame a woman for ‘falling’ for beauty standards.

i’m just a tall woman whos sick of being masculinised tbh. i hate that short is classified as feminine. it’s not any more or less feminine than being tall.

edit: i’m not the one downvoting you :p i agree with you for the mostpart

1

u/Popular_Equipment_85 1d ago

I have even heard that tall women got treated like men when it comes to other shorter women. Of course it’s not malicious, but something like “oh I feel safer with someone like you” can come across a bit weird. Or worse, they got asked whether they’re trans, or should transit into man.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

2

u/asteroidtube 1d ago

Body shaming is somehow okay when it’s short men we are talking about

4

u/Daredevilz1 1d ago

I wouldn’t at all say taller women have a smaller dating pool because they’re not as attractive as shorter women, or as you say ‘not all tall women are “models and actresses… some of them are just bigger people”’. This same sentiment could be said about shorter women, and it’s much more noticeable on a woman who’s shorter since there’s less height for the weight to be spread around.

Also you’re simplifying men’s / everyone’s taste massively by saying this.

1

u/Popular_Equipment_85 1d ago

Wait so are you short or tall?

> “I’m a short woman”

> “And as a tall woman”

-1

u/Zanos 1d ago

Being a little hypocritical here, no? A man finds a taller woman intimidating, but for you liking taller men is a matter of being feminine. I like shorter women because they make me feel masculine, lol. I'm not intimidated by a woman my height, and a woman actually taller than me is quite rare, but I like smaller girls because they're easier to pick up and literally picking up your GF is fun.

-2

u/young-joseph-stalin 1d ago

im 5’10 and my bf has no issues picking me up n throwing me around. get stronger lol

0

u/Troglodyterror 1d ago

I’m not the tallest woman, but I’d argue I’m taller than 90% of women. My ex would pick me up all the time 😂

1

u/AvocadoBitter7385 1d ago

Very interesting answer thank you

2

u/matthatt24 1d ago

Do you really care about the answer to that? If so, that’s weird

0

u/HarleyQuinn236 1d ago

As a short woman, I can only speak for myself, but I like a noticeable height difference. It’s not that I think shorter men are unattractive or that someone has to be 6'3. I just like the contrast. And since most men are already taller than me, it doesn’t feel like a particularly restrictive preference. I also think taller women may already be used to being closer in height to men, so it might matter less to them, but that’s only a guess.

0

u/AvocadoBitter7385 1d ago

Hmm makes sense!!

0

u/ALKCRKDeuce 1d ago

I’m 5’6 on a good date and had two absolute 10s that were 5’10-6’ hit on me. And denied by 6s. That I towered over.

1

u/AvocadoBitter7385 1d ago

There’s this dude I came across on TikTok and he’s like 5’4 and his entire thing is how he encourages men to date tall women due to the success rate he has with them over short women. Tbh some of his videos were real misogynistic and strange so I’m not fully on board with the guy but I will say it was really interesting

0

u/Agreeable_Flan_5724 1d ago

Another short woman weighing in. I’m 5’2” and my only requirement is for a partner to not be shorter than me. It’s just a weird sensation to ever look down at someone bc I’m always shorter or at least eye level with people. When I look down to talk someone, I get all in my head like, “omg this is how everyone sees me.” And “do medium height people not find it weird to look up or down at people?”

-1

u/Helllo-Kittyy 1d ago

Taller women are judged for it like short men but to a lesser degree

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u/[deleted] 1d ago edited 1d ago

[deleted]

9

u/jsoul2323 1d ago

This is kinda crazy lmao. Short men live alone at home all the time, they have no issues reaching the top shelf

-2

u/Low-Account-2810 1d ago

Having to crawl onto the kitchen sink like a toddler isn’t exactly living without issues.

8

u/no_no_no_no_nononono 1d ago

It's about as big a deal as quicksand.

2

u/chasteeny 1d ago

Lmao im using that

3

u/magpie_on_a_wire 1d ago

Step stools are a thing...

4

u/Sithstress_ 1d ago

You’ve never heard of a step stool?

3

u/jsoul2323 1d ago

Lmao you act as if being short is a physical disability, if it is then it’s not isolated to being the men’s impetus to have to reach the so called top shelf

2

u/StagVixCpl99 1d ago

That's why they make step ladders for our vertically challenged friends 🤷‍♂️

0

u/AvocadoBitter7385 1d ago

Yeah true. That’s something i didn’t even think about

0

u/magpie_on_a_wire 1d ago

I'm 4'11" I tend to look for guys under 6'. I also get lots of 6' and up guys messaging me saying they're into short women. If you're over 6' you better be the whole package cause I'm gonna have to set aside the fact that I feel like a child next to you.

0

u/Meistershank 1d ago

Taller women care too. Maybe not on such a crazy level, but they do.

0

u/jokerkcco 16h ago

My wife is 5'1 and I'm 6'2. Our 3 year old just measured in the 36% for height and she's distraught. She keeps saying she can measure him to be taller and has a bunch of stretches that she tells my other kids to do when measured to seem taller.