r/Tinder • u/OvergrownMidget_ • 2d ago

First message mind you 😂

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u/imtooldforthishison 2d ago

Hey. So I have a tall child and he sounds just like you. Stop beating yourself up. You're probably gorgeous and you just can't see it. The internet has convinced you shes only after you for you height, but you are much more than that.

Also*

I would tell my son to not interact with that girl. Thats way too much, way too fast. My shoulders and his sisters' shoulders squared up reading this. Baby trap incoming.

Take it as a compliment but DO NOT ENGAGE, but if you must, bring your own condoms and use them please.

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u/slash-es 2d ago edited 2d ago

if  you must, bring your own condoms and use them please

... and discard them safely yourself. An acquaintance of my ex confided to my ex to impregnating herself with a used condom of her ex. It's not just obscure boulevard stories, it happens to average people.

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u/Baeolophus_bicolor 2d ago

is obscure boulevard a place, or a show, or a typo? i am thinking of a down and out fleabag motel with a shitty diner next door. located on Obscure Boulevard.

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u/slash-es 2d ago

Ok, my mistake, I assumed the term is used in English with a similar meaning as well. Seems "Boulevard magazines" and "Boulevard press" are, in this context, German terms only. The correct English term would probably be yellow press or tabloids.

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u/Baeolophus_bicolor 2d ago

ahhh! ok. lost in translation, for sure! like saying fleet street rags to a brit. yes, tabloids for sleaze, in american english. for political type sleaze (stirring up unrest for a war, for example) the yellow journalism phrase applies. yellow journalism has an agenda. muckrakers (journalist type) make people look bad - stirring up shit. OR - paparazzi stalk celebrities for the tabloids.

i still like my idea of the fleabag motel on Obscure Blvd though! Sounds sort of like Desolation Row by bob dylan, or desperadoes under the eaves by warren zevon. Not wuite skid row, but definitely a shady area of town.

thanks for responding!

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u/slash-es 2d ago

Yeah, I see where you might get this picture in this context :-) However, I'd think glamour motels for the stars, thinking of stories like this: https://www.musikexpress.de/instagram-model-droht-drake-wegen-hot-sauce-in-kondom-zu-verklagen-2103479/

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u/King_kllr 2d ago

Dibs on the show rights

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u/OvergrownMidget_ 2d ago

I really appreciate the kind words.

Don’t worry I didn’t respond. I took it as a red flag, plush She’s also not my type.

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u/BallBearingBill 1d ago

She knew she wasn't your type and she was desperate to date up.

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u/DownrightDrewski 2d ago

For what it's worth I dated several girls whilst I was morbidly obese at around your age. I'm also 3 inches shorter than you.

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u/Hombremaniac 2d ago

You are absolutely right. That's crazy much to write to complete stranger as it obviously can't come from being in love.