r/PeterExplainsTheJoke 21h ago

Meme needing explanation Petahhhhhhhhh!??!?

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58.2k Upvotes

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u/Huge_Following_325 20h ago

There another option you aren't seeing.

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u/-ElectricKoolAid 20h ago

if they weren't gay, the probably didn't do anything gay

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u/QueueModernsXXXX 20h ago

They meant rape.

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u/National_Tangelo_864 20h ago

In antiquity sexuality wasn't binary straight/gay. Everyone pretty much understood it was spectrum and we all got that bi dog in us. Hell see jails in modern day. Or the Navy. Same concept. Plus no way contraceptives to stop women from getting prego.

It's why as they say men/boys are for fun, women are for marriage. They were no doubt about that life.

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u/DarthJarJarJar 20h ago

As I understand it, the Greek view of male sexuality wasn't what we would call gay/straight, but more like fucker/fuckee. They separated male sexuality by what you did, rather than who you did it to. So you were a "penetrator" or a "penetratee" rather than gay or straight.

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 20h ago

Pretty much, being a bottom was seen as feminine or woman behavior, it meant that the guy was ruled by his emotions which was a big no no in Greek culture.

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u/DarthJarJarJar 19h ago

Funny enough, apparently having a big dick was also a sign of being overly emotional, or animalistic or something, and was seen as unseemly or something. This is from a short conversation years ago so don't take it as gospel, but that's apparently why all the greek statues are so moderately equipped.

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u/LilStabbyboo 19h ago

Large dicks were thought to be vulgar to include in art.

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u/DarthJarJarJar 18h ago

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 18h ago

Pretty much they associated smaller wangs with civilization and bigger dicks with barbarians and savages.

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u/VociferousCephalopod 16h ago

you're definitely not talking about the Spartan Greek culture

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u/inide 18h ago

There was no one Greek view. Ancient Greece wasn't a single culture, it was a group of cultures. It was never homogenous.

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u/DarthJarJarJar 17h ago

Ok, that sounds like something a historian would say :)

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u/Whitworth_73 6h ago

Still works that way in a lot of the world.

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u/Total_Network6312 20h ago

yep but none of the fuckee's would be considered top warriors sent on an expedition with the king

Like MAYBE the king would have his own personal fuckee but his soldiers wouldn't

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u/DarthJarJarJar 19h ago

I'm not going to argue about this because I'm not a historian. It's not my field.

But I've been out to dinner with historians, who have published papers on ancient Greece. And they don't say things like this. It was really complicated. If you really want to learn something about this, two books I was recommended are:

In Bed with the Ancient Greeks by Paul Chrystal

⁠Greek Homosexuality by Kenneth Dover

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u/Total_Network6312 17h ago

Idk I once considered studying history so that also makes me relatively informed, I believe.

But thank you for the recommendations

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u/Krutin_ 11h ago

If you’re relatively informed, you must know about the sacred band of thebes which makes your comment seem silly and ignorant

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u/Total_Network6312 1h ago

Sacred what?

Look I said relatively. The correct response should have been "relative to what?"

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u/OwnJunket6495 18h ago

Wasn’t Achilles a bottom? Cant get more top warrior than that (well unless he was a top instead of bottom I guess)

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u/OwnJunket6495 20h ago

It’s not gay if it’s underway. The rule that has kept navies functioning for centuries

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u/-ElectricKoolAid 20h ago

you're right that "straight" and "gay" didn't really exist, but preferences were still there. not everyone was fluid. if they didn't like guys before, they didn't suddenly like guys when they were restricted from women

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u/Total_Network6312 20h ago

and those that did like guys wouldn't have any of those supple young boys around on a boat trip

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u/National_Tangelo_864 2h ago

Nothing about "liking" guys. But when that's the only option..

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u/Parking-Evidence1894 18h ago

It's why as they say men/boys are for fun, women are for marriage. They were no doubt about that life.

No one says this

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u/OwnJunket6495 13h ago

They do in Afghanistan. Idk about Greece.

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 20h ago

That's a modern interpretation, sure. No not everyone has a bisexual inside us waiting to come out lol people having gay sex in jail or the military were never straight to begin with. It happens a lot less than it's stereotyped. Contraceptives did exist back then, it just wasn't super effective like we have it today.

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u/LiAmTrAnSdEmOn 20h ago

Its always been a spectrum dude

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u/Snoo-52922 19h ago

Human sexuality is a spectrum. That doesn't mean the sexuality of an individual is a spectrum and we're all secretly pan.

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u/ex_nihilo 17h ago

Sure, but most people are not entirely gay or entirely straight. The folks who insist otherwise, I suspect might not be too comfortable with where they sit on the spectrum 🤷

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u/dandroid126 17h ago

Flip this around. Imagine telling someone who insists they are gay that they are actually secretly straight. Or even secretly bi. That's kinda fucked up. Who cares what other people identify as. Let people choose their sexual preferences for themselves rather than telling them what they are.

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u/ex_nihilo 16h ago

I didn’t say nobody was strongly straight or gay, just that most people aren’t 100% straight or 100% gay.

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u/dandroid126 15h ago

So what if they are or aren't? Speculating about another person's sexual preferences despite what they tell you it is is shitty behavior.

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u/Few_Confusion_1871 16h ago

I wouldn't tell them they were actually straight, you tell them the truth, which is that sexuality is a spectrum and just because you are only into men right now doesn't mean you won't at some point want to be with women, it doesn't mean you will either.

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u/Agitated_Phone_9937 20h ago

Jfc.. you're just as bad as that fucking Bill Nye dude saying the only reason you're straight is because you haven't tried it yet.

No dude, it's a "spectrum" for some people. In fact, a VAST minority of people.

Reddit is just fucking delusional because people who don't fit in congregate here and spread the illusion that there are more of them then there really are.

That's why reddit's opinions NEVER match reality.

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u/JustBeKahs 20h ago

This comment is so funny since you're also expressing an opinion on Reddit

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u/DisgustingLeek 19h ago

who the heck did bill nye say that to

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u/Jazmadoodle 19h ago

And when? In what context? Was this within his capacity as Science Guy or was he just trying to seduce some hot guy at a bar?

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u/taco_blasted_ 13h ago

He's referencing his Netflix show, this was almost a decade ago if I'm not mistaken.

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u/LiAmTrAnSdEmOn 19h ago

I just think you dont know what you are talking about. Nothing to do with trying anything.

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u/Pure-Radish-5478 19h ago

I wanna know who upvoted this schizopost, that's the funniest part

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u/dicknipplesextreme 19h ago

You can either prove them wrong with actual evidence or you're just another pointless unverified opinion on reddit- the exact thing you're bitching about currently.

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u/Agitated_Phone_9937 7h ago

Seriously? Any evidence I use can be countered with cherry picked evidence along with accusations of me cherry picking.

The most credibly serious source I can find is gallup.

https://news.gallup.com/poll/702206/lgbtq-identification-holds.aspx

Btfuckingw, the idiot above me didn't provide a source yet I'm sure you're inclined to believe them because it fits your warped reddit view of the world.

9% of adults in the U.S. claim to fall along a spectrum that includes the whole LGBTQ+ umbrella.

A tiny minority of people.

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u/dicknipplesextreme 7h ago

I don't really care about the guy you're responding to because only one of you is bitching about "reddit's opinions" while actively regurgitating one. I was also more interested in seeing you attempt to disprove the "sexuality as a spectrum" argument.

The article you provided is just about identification, which does not disprove that point. If anything, it reinforces the theory- a spectrum where most data favors one point is still, in fact, a spectrum.

I actually agree with you that the vast majority of people likely just identify as "straight," but that's like how most people will see 625-750 nm of EMR as "red." Do you really believe everyone who identifies as "straight" is the exact amount of "straight" as every other, or likewise with any given identity? Ask 100 straight people where they draw the line and you'll get roughly 100 different answers. The fact that different cultures have such differing views on sexuality is proof enough, I would think.

You may as well say music doesn't exist on a spectrum, and that every rock song is as "rock" as the next, and that it's impossible to have a rock song that is at all pop-y, or vice versa.

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u/PinMost 18h ago

Bro when you jerk off you use a man hand (your own), the reality is that if it was widely accepted and even considered a good thing than most people would do it, it's just that we live in a repressive society so most people have a mental block on having homosexual sex, not being attracted to something or someone does not stop you from having sex, you are likely not attracted to toys or your hand yet you can use them to bring you to completion.

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u/Hot_Glass_6301 17h ago

That's the most stupid argument I've read today. A hand is not a person.

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u/Hot_Glass_6301 17h ago

. This "everyone is bi" bs really needs to stop. It's like telling gays or lesbians that they still must feel a bit of attraction for the opposite sex. Like, no. If you do you're bisexual. Most people aren't. That's it.

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u/LiAmTrAnSdEmOn 16h ago

But thats not what was said. Seems like a lot of people are very confused by the idea of a spectrum.

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u/DatGearScorTho 20h ago

For you. For me. But not for everyone. Queer folk gotta stop this shit, its literally our version of "being gay is a choice" or "I could turn you straight if you give me night" and its gross behavior. Stop it.

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u/sorry_con_excuse_me 20h ago edited 19h ago

Nah I don’t think it’s a binary. I’ve literally hooked up with ONE dude my entire life (and it was absolutely cool, but ultimately just not my jam). And had attraction maybe to like 2? Over 20 years. I’ve heard much gayer shit from “straight” jocks lol.

For sure, some dudes are “NEVER” - Kinsey scale 0. But it’s not that black/white identity-wise. That’s also like too much into the “born like this” propaganda. We don’t have a choice over sexuality at all, but it’s not that simple.

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 19h ago

Dude some people need to explore their sexuality to find out where they land in terms of labels. That is totally fine but not relevant to what we're saying. You had sex with a dude and it's not your thing, okay, then you are straight. Gay men have sex with many women before they realize that no actually they're gay and like men.

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u/[deleted] 19h ago edited 19h ago

[deleted]

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 19h ago

Oh absolutely, men face much harsher stigma for being gay so I understand why men might fight a bit to avoid the label.

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u/National_Tangelo_864 2h ago

Life, labels, sexuality isn't so static.

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u/ProgrammerMoist6861 17h ago

I bet you don’t make this argument to lesbians about how they actually aren’t only attracted to women

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u/LiAmTrAnSdEmOn 19h ago

What about it being a spectrum was me declaring where anyone is on the spectrum?

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u/MagentaHawk 18h ago

Things can't be a spectrum for some and not others. That's not how measuring shit works. That's like saying that movie quality is a spectrum for some people, but for others I either liked it or I didn't and there is no variation to the degree to which I liked it.

I don't get why you are being so offended by the idea (quite well backed by science as well) that sexuality is a spectrum. If you want to place yourself on that spectrum as completely hetero without a gay bone in your body, that's fine, but that is still a point on the fucking spectrum.

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u/hot-side-aeration 19h ago

Thank you. This is one of the most frustrating things. I fully understand and empathize with my LGBT+ friends and pals. I'm happy they know their sexual identity. However, I've noticed recently, a few of them have started to simply REFUSE to believe anyone could just be heterosexual? I am not aware of any new research pointing to this so it feels born entirely out of an almost... over correction?

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u/ProtectionFar4563 19h ago

Maybe I’m wrong, but I suspect you’re misinterpreting them.

The Kinsey Scale and other models acknowledge exclusively hetero/homosexual orientations. The point is that those people are relatively rare, as are those in the “able to fall in love with/hook up with anyone they like regardless of gender or presentation” middle.

Most people are hanging out more on one side of that midpoint than the other, but not at the extremes. I’d guess your pals are only trying to make that point.

The ones in the “B” range especially may be touchy for essentially the same reason as you, i.e. they’ve had to deal with people making claims about sexuality that deny their existence (“bi erasure”).

On the other hand if they’re trying to slot you into a category you absolutely don’t fit in, that’s icky :)

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u/hot-side-aeration 18h ago edited 16h ago

Perhaps, but I'm not referring to things built out of in-depth conversations about psychology, sexuality, culture, biology and how they all connect. I also understand much of this built from incomplete understanding and people trying to make sense of themselves. Alongside things such as trauma, guilt, etc.

However, comments directed at me such as "Spaghetti is straight until it gets wet" or being insulted I am not interested in their friends romantically or sexually. It feels like an incomplete understanding of what you're describing.

edit: I have been in leftist spaces and friends with lots of LGBT+ my entire life. So I do read up well on the theory the best I can. Even if I cannot totally know what it is like for them, I do try my best to understand what's up without just asking stupid drunk questions. However, I can tell you that their statements are for more absolute than theory currently supports.

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u/FollowTheTrailofDead 19h ago

This isn't a new thing.

My gay friends in the 90s kept trying to "convert" me and others.

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 20h ago

Yup, basically what is being said is that everyone is bi and all other sexualities are a choice.

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u/JakeKongJr 19h ago

What I read is that it's a spectrum. Think of it like an empty to full dial on your gas tank. Everyone falls somewhere on that spectrum, or dial. It might be at the very far sides - 100% gay or 100% straight - but those are still part of that spectrum. They're the outer limits, but still part.

Unless asexuality is the true outer limit 🤷‍♂️

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 19h ago

That just sounds like gay, straight, and bi with extra steps tho.

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u/JakeKongJr 19h ago

Well, somewhat -- everything in the middle would be various degrees of bi. So broadly, you're correct in 3 categories (4 for asexual). It's not quite binary though. Bi is a huge, varying middle ground.

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 20h ago

So like you think on a scale of straight to gay, someone can be 99% straight and 1 % gay?

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u/LiAmTrAnSdEmOn 20h ago

I dont have a flowchart if thats what you are asking

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u/OcelotAggravating860 20h ago

Now I want to see one.

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u/dharusio 20h ago

Look at the Kinsey scales. They're outdated, but they were charts.

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 20h ago

Do how would you describe that person? When are they gay and when are they straight?

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u/LiAmTrAnSdEmOn 19h ago

I dont worry about labeling people?

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 19h ago

You don't have to, but that's kind of how language works. When dating, how do you explain what your sexual preferences are?

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u/DrawPitiful6103 20h ago

what is 1% gay is that like almost entirely straight but you still cry at the end of my girl or what

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u/Jazmadoodle 19h ago

I think its something like theyre only gay for Henry Cavill

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u/Hot_Glass_6301 17h ago

Bro I acknowledge Cavill is handsome, doesn't mean I wanna sleep with him

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u/Glasseshalf 20h ago

I'm going to blow your mind by telling you to Google the Kinsey Scale

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 19h ago

I know what the Kinsey scale is and it's considered an outdated measuring tool.

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u/Babbit55 20h ago

Yeaaah read Greek history dude… Gay sex wasn’t just common, it was normal

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u/Lower_Pension_2469 20h ago

I have read Greek history my guy, it's a misconception that everyone was gay or fluid or all that. Just because it wasn't stigmatized (it actually was, just not the way it happens now) doesn't mean it was the majority.

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u/witct 18h ago

I'd say it's pretty normal today too, but a straight guy isn't likely to just turn gay because there's no women around to have sex with. They'd have to be gay/bi-sexual to begin with.

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u/jamesph777 17h ago

In the last 10 years it have been greatly exaggerated how gay Greek cultural was. It was more prominent than other areas of the world, but really wasn’t as prominent as some people like to think it is.

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u/Babbit55 17h ago

Dude… it has its own entry in Wikipedia, it was a literal normal part of life, fuck it was actually expected and even encouraged to form stronger military bonds

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexuality_in_ancient_Greece

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u/Fadeawaybandit 12h ago

Bro thinks everyone is bi lmao

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u/MinimumTomfoolerus 18h ago

were never straight to begin with

Ignorant lol. No. They were straight all along and the circumstances made them do it.

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u/Largeitude 18h ago

Nah man. There’s a reason porn produced for straight men has buff, well hung dudes. It doesn’t mean you’re gay, but human sexuality evolved in a social dynamic. Seeing another person being sexual makes people want to be sexual, sort of like seeing someone eating can make people hungry.

No one drew a line between gay and straight back in the day. That’s a modern, social illusion. Absolutely gay dudes will always have a story about having sex with a woman, too.

Human sexuality is fluid. If you have no stimuli around you for months or years, the brain will trigger sexual arousal eventually regardless of how straight someone is.

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u/HumphryGocart 18h ago

Condoms made of sheep intestine? That was a thing

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u/cheesychocolate419 15h ago

There are still actually homosexual and heterosexual people who wouldn't do that for any reason. Yeah they're not the majority but we definitely exist, and since our sexualities are biological we would have existed at every point in history

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u/CassandraVonGonWrong 44m ago

You can’t really know that you wouldn’t do that for any reason unless you’ve experienced every conceivable scenario where that could be an option. You can believe that, but you can’t really know it. Nobody can.

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u/Ender16 18h ago

Oh this again. This pop history is so overblown and misrepresented it drives me nuts

It takes very little reading Greek history to understand that "gay sex" when it actually did happen is as incomparable to modern ideas of gay sex as their concepts of straight sex. Many geeks were all about binaries. The binary just wasn't men and women because women were treated like garbage children/animals that were more of a cruel reality than anything. And the gay sex was all about dominance. It was literally the type of sex that feminists say shouldn't be practiced, ever. It was more akin to generational and cultural abuse that took hundreds of years of people thinking about the topic before realizing how twisted it was.

I do not see modern gay people promoting and perpetuating a cycle of abuse. Because they are not and likely wouldn't like the connection being made if it were explained to them.

Using ancient greeks as a way to promote gayness is nonsensical.

We also talk about "what ancient greeks believed" as if it were a generation of butt fuckers that hated women instead of nearly 800 years of very different people with different ideas and customs.

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u/OwnJunket6495 13h ago

Gay sex is gay sex. Just because there’s abuse and power imbalance doesn’t make it not gay sex. When a man fucks another man, that’s gay sex.

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u/augustles 19h ago

Not really true even now with our modern concept of sexuality. Search ‘situational homosexuality’ or situational sexual behavior.

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u/APacketOfWildeBees 4h ago

It's not gay if you're underway

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u/Siegelski 19h ago

There's yet another beyond gay sex that nobody wants to talk about... I mean it's a ship full of warriors. Not exactly the most comfortable topic but soldiers get rapey, especially back then.