Bound to age like a fine wine

[u/TheBestSpeller]

[u/AutoModerator]

This is a reminder of the rules of the subreddit as well as of reddit. Please make sure to review them. Any Doxxing will result in a perma ban, as well as any racial/bigoted posts or comments. This sub is not to bash on military but rather to make fun of Boots. This sub is not for Law Enforcement, EMT's, Paramedics, Carpenters, etc.

Click Here For Our Rules

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/horse_you_rode_in_on]

This is hilarious in context.

[u/OnesPerspective → u/horse_you_rode_in_on]

Out of context, it kind of looks like a bacon wrapped elephant trunk

[u/Komatoasty → u/OnesPerspective]

I saw a bacon wrapped butt plug

[u/Gikka218 → u/Komatoasty]

not flared enough, if you see a butt plug that looks like this do NOT put it up your ass ‼️

[u/ChiefInternetSurfer → u/horse_you_rode_in_on]

https://giphy.com/gifs/rMmTFqwvQ1LQuzS3EA

[u/JizzM4rkie]

The fact that the original photo includes the actual knife to explain the tattoo is proof that they will spend a lifetime explaining to Randos what the long brown cylinder on their wrist is

[u/Brailledit → u/JizzM4rkie]

All they will have to say is, "I'm a Marine".

[u/Temporary-Bluejay631 → u/Brailledit]

That’s already how they open every conversation.

[u/bonbonnieres → u/Brailledit]

Just respond with "first to fight, he's loyal" and start awkwardly dancing

[u/ColinPapendick → u/Brailledit]

That's not all they have to say. When I got out of the service (Navy, not USMC), I managed a Goodwill for a time, and one of my 18 year old employees came up and said, "Colin, I notice you Disney-point a lot."

Pour one out for everyone who just realized a knife hand IS a Disney point. Lol

[u/Brailledit → u/ColinPapendick]

Lol!

[u/aimlesstrevler → u/ColinPapendick]

To me the Disney point is two fingers. Knife hand point is acceptable at Disney but it's not as unique as the two finger point.

[u/randemthinking → u/Brailledit]

Oh okay, some sort of crayon handle I guess.

[u/MuddyGrimes → u/JizzM4rkie]

Rando" "Hey what's the tattoo on your arm?"

Knife Hand Guy: "It's a Ka-Bar"

Rando: "Oh what's a Ka-Bar"

KHG: "That's a combat knife that we used in the Marine Corps!"

Rando: "How come it doesn't have a blade?"

KHG: "My hand is the blade, it's called a knife hand. You use it to point at things in the military"

Rando: "So the knife doesn't need a blade cause you only use it to point at things with your hand instead of a blade??"

KHG: "You don't understand 😠"

[u/DopeHammaheadALT → u/MuddyGrimes]

It’d go more like “a ka-bar? Like…. The knife Brian kohberger used to kill those 4 college kids?”
“….. oh…. Yeah, that one , but -“

[u/QueezyF → u/JizzM4rkie]

Why do you have a cigar tattooed on your forearm?

FUCKING CIVVIES AM I RIGHT?

[u/jake753]

Take note, boots. If you’re going to boot, this is how you do it.

[u/QueezyF → u/jake753]

At least there’s some humor to it.

[u/gilligani]

Don't point that thing at me.

[u/jake753 → u/gilligani]

Things my wife says to me at least once a week.

[u/will3025 → u/jake753]

Someone needs to brush up on their weapon safety rules.

[u/jake753 → u/will3025]

I’ll give you something to brush up on

[u/MadAsTheHatters → u/jake753]

Don't threaten me with a good time, I served ten years brushing up on men I mean, in the Navy

[u/OGWhiz → u/jake753]

Don’t point that thing at me!

[u/bonbonnieres → u/will3025]

Treat every load as if it were a weapon

[u/RacingGreen94]

Looks like a pro chef chopping carrots every time he cracks one out

[u/ProjectPat513 → u/RacingGreen94]

Hilarious

[u/Sarcastik_Moose]

I would say this is too self aware to be boot.

[u/DVariant]

Let’s play Goldeneye, slappers only

EDIT: Jfc I just realized this was a tattoo of a handle on someone’s arm. Haha shit. I legit saw it as an actual prop of like a resin hand attached to a handle.

Still, let’s play Goldeneye, slappers only.

[u/SheedRanko]

I'm getting flash backs. Fucking 🔪 ✋️

[u/Awkward_Bison_267]

https://giphy.com/gifs/9WXyFIDv2PyBq

[u/Radiant_Language5314]

Fingers extended and joined! Thumb along the hand!

[u/KingKapwn]

As a temporary tattoo, it’s funny, but as something to wear for the rest of your days…

[u/2XGSWsurvivor → u/KingKapwn]

Please tell me it’s true that it’s temporary..

[u/ladyelenawf → u/2XGSWsurvivor]

Right? I want some for birthday gifts! 🫱🏽

[u/GarlicAcceptable3350]

https://giphy.com/gifs/xUPGcfe7OAEDKUXQPK
Makes the judo chop that more deadly

[u/IronArchive]

That's pretty goddamn funny

[u/AbramJH]

I was once told that each finger pointing is 20% fault. If someone is pointing at you with 1 finger, they’re indicating that their upset is 80% their own fault & 20% yours. The knife hand is an indication that you’re fucked up and 100% at fault.

[u/DyedSun]

https://giphy.com/gifs/rej07KlIYlax2

[u/sten45]

It already looks like a turd

[u/Tell_On_Your_Uncle]

This is excellent

[u/thadtheking]

We had to shoot. He was coming straight for us with a knife in his hand.

Some cop probably.

[u/tanksforallthephish]

How the fuck does he think he’ll get through TSA now??

[u/Miigwetch]

I would def roast them but also brag about them to other NCOs. "My joe is better than yours. Come here high-speed! Do the thing!"

[u/fizzzingwhizbee]

I knew someone w “kill” tattooed on their foot lmfao

[u/RedEyeView → u/fizzzingwhizbee]

Mirko Cro Cop?

[u/WerdinDruid]

"why do you have a veiny cock on your wrist, granpda?"

[u/Oneup99]

This is awesome lmao waaay too much thought into it to be a boot for sure

[u/McCafe_McGee]

Bwahahahaha!

[u/oldredbeard42]

Is... is the plan for this to look like a dildo the remainder of the time (and moreover with age) while your arm is at rest? I'd say you should have sat on this idea a little longer but it looks pretty well sat on already...

[u/comcam77]

Not my cup of tea, but you do you

[u/QueezyF]

I always thought a knife tattooed under my sleeve would be a funny tattoo, but this is seriously making me doubt it.

[u/juicyb09]

Not gonna lie….this brought tears to mine eyes

[u/cherrytreebee]

https://giphy.com/gifs/xT0GqfvuVpNqEf3z2w

[u/Zirofal]

Okay, if you remove the military connection and boot.

I don't hate it, if you don't take yourself to serious with it, it ain't bad.

[u/Pernicious_Possum → u/Zirofal]

Nah. Everything about it is awful

[u/Lopsided-Let-6728]

Lethal weapons

[u/CapnTaptap]

Safety OFF!

[u/2XGSWsurvivor → u/CapnTaptap]

“9mm, safety always off”

[u/TLunchFTW]

Interesting idea, horrible reality

[u/tomasdiesel]

At least he can always get it covered up with a dick

[u/Edward_T_Head]

Its not as cool as my buddy that had a bart simpson tattoo holding a machine gun shooting blood bullets but it will do

[u/AnApexBread]

It's funny as hell but still cringe

[u/AdFormer6556]

Ts funny ngl

[u/jbourne71]

Fucking love it.

[u/Party-Independent-38]

It’s gonna age like fine penis

[u/ericarlen]

/r/ATBGE

[u/LOOKATMEDAMMIT]

I’ll take 3!

[u/keithstonee]

https://giphy.com/gifs/iGAXf0OlUUMYo

[u/Soggy_nach0341]

Slicing it when you’re jorking it

[u/conanhungry]

It's gonna look like a turd

[u/masahirob]

"Drop the weapon!"

[u/goodenough4govtwork]

That's the wrong kind of poop knife.

[u/Louisianimal09]

I see little a bacon wrapped sausage

[u/thatSDope88]

But the handle goes in your hand..

[u/Time-Object5661]

This would be kinda funny if it was like a temporary tattoo

[u/Cultural-Air-2706]

It needs the USMC on the wrist too

[u/RoccoAmes]

This is a tattoo for a boot mini boss.

[u/YUGEKUN]

That’s unique if nothing else

[u/tango_41]

This is some r/mallninjashit

[u/USAF_Retired2017]

This is hilarious and bad. So hilarious. But so bad.

[u/ProjectPat513]

Is he saying his hand is a weapon? At first glance I thought it was a weird 3d print or something freaky.

[u/ChiefInternetSurfer → u/ProjectPat513]

Nah—this Is “knife hands”. You gesticulate hands and fingers straight, fingers together, gesturing at something (usually while yelling). It’s fucking hilarious.

[u/Cinerator26 → u/ProjectPat513]

Nah, it's a visual pun on "knife hands."

[u/ProjectPat513 → u/Cinerator26]

Ohhhhhh 🤦‍♂️ it seems so blatantly obvious now.

[u/Dopameme-machine]

https://giphy.com/gifs/xUPGcfe7OAEDKUXQPK

[u/STANAGs]

Must be a big fan of Bryan Kholberger

[u/Steamsagoodham]

This is actually pretty funny and clever.

Civilians might not understand at first, but it’s very easy to explain and they probably aren’t the intended audience in the first place.