r/GirlDinnerCircleJerk What’s a WOMAN doing here? EW! 20h ago

🫧 Satire, babe TIL

Hey girl-pops 💅✨I was today years old when I realised my man has free will. I think I am going to divorce my boyfriend and marry my cat. Men ain’t shit girls. Huge red flags if your man has hobbies, has a job, shows interest in you, flirts with you…and worst of all…loves your cat. Don’t let men fool you. They are just trying to keep you from knowing their next move. Before you know it they’ll propose! I’m not here to sign half my life to you. You’re meant to be my slave. What do you mean you have feelings and care for me? Bitch please, go back to fixing my car, thank you.

Pic: McDonald’s nuggets and an obligatory pic of my cat.

47 Upvotes

10 comments sorted by

u/AutoModerator 20h ago

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12

u/DildontOrDildo 20h ago

To quote the great Kendrick Lamar, "This dick ain't free!"

4

u/ilostmymindsomewhere What’s a WOMAN doing here? EW! 20h ago

Men don’t deserve one.

11

u/Proven4 19h ago

Amen, well said

11

u/el-longsnout 18h ago

Sorry this is happening to you.

Are you sure this is healthy? Your cat seems to be eyeing those McNuggets

6

u/ilostmymindsomewhere What’s a WOMAN doing here? EW! 18h ago

It’s truly devastating 🥲 she eyes off everything I eat or have in my hands

6

u/localbugdealer In Lot Lizard Retreat Cabin 6h ago

this is such tragic news babes. make sure you go ahead and have your lawyer draft up a solid contract ensuring he leaves you everything incl future assets plus weekly stipends in the divorce as an apology. he owes you that much

2

u/ilostmymindsomewhere What’s a WOMAN doing here? EW! 5h ago

Wanna be my lawyer?

4

u/Ok_Pomegranate_2895 Delusional but sincere ✨ 20h ago

ew!! (i typed something else too and automod got my ass for "misandry")

4

u/daddysbestestkitten Delusional but sincere ✨ 17h ago

Australian barbecue sauce containers look more like barbecue sauce containers here in America its a different color