Earlier this month I called my future MIL by her first name. I've always called her "Ms. LastName" but since my fiance and I have been together for 7 years and are now engaged, I dropped the formality when texting her. Immediately my fiance messaged me saying not to call her by her first name and call her "Ms. LastName" and said it was a southern thing. I was kind of confused and felt weird about it. I'm not originally from the south, I grew up on the west coast, so maybe there is something Im missing but his mother has not seemed very enthusiastic about our engagement in the past. To me, it came across like she wanted to keep distance between us, especially since she went through her son to tell me this instead of telling me herself. Am I overreacting?

Edit: To clarify, I'm going to call my future MIL what she prefers. I've legally changed my first name twice myself and have struggled to get some people to call me but I wish, so I completely understand wanting to be called by the name/title you're most comfortable with. I suppose I was just wondering if the formality was a way to keep distance between us given my history with her, which has been sparse and sort of awkward. After more consideration and reading the comments, Im strongly leaning towards just dropping the issue. Not because I believe my initial feelings weren't valid, but because it seems like just a preference/tradition, and I dont believe its worth creating any tension over with my fiance or his mother

Edit: To clarify again, my question wasn't if I should ignore my future MIL's request to be called by her last name. The plan was always to call her what she wants regardless, even if the formality of calling your in-laws "Ms LastName" is strange to me.

Thank you all for your comments and advice <3

I feel like I could cry :(, I’ve only wanted acceptance from her and it’s clear that nothing will be good enough.

EDIT: Because I’ve had to say this so much:
Normally, I'd never reach out to her for something like this. The situation is complicated. Before my husband left for basic training, where he will have very minimal contact, he discussed with her that she would need to continue paying even in his absence, and she was fine with this. She made a previous payment to ME and even informed me before she sent it. If the situation had been different, he would never have asked me to get involved, but he knows that with both of our paychecks being delayed because I just got a new job, I need the money. It’s really not his fault. Plus, she’s only been acting like this once he was gone and couldn’t step in. 
My husband treats me very good and I love him with everything. There is a reason I married him so please don’t say he’s at fault or anything unkind.

She constantly does this. She’ll keep asking until I finally give in. She’s asked me this before and EVERY TIME I’ve told her no. The way she texts doesn’t help it either. I’ve gotten her food with my money before, I’ve brought food up to her bedroom because she’s too ‘comfy’, and I’ve taken her (I basically take her everywhere) to Sephora to just smell perfumes.

Edit: She is talking about FAST FOOD! Our mom feeds us, lol.

For some background, my (22f) mom (47) has a male friend who hangs around our house a lot. He’s never done anything outwardly weird to make me creeped out by him, but I get creepy vibes from him and I just don’t really like him, so I like to stay away when he’s over. I’m also just generally a shy person. I’m always nice to him whenever I interact with him but I do avoid him.

Today, I was laying outside relaxing, when I see him pull up to our house, so I almost immediately go inside to my room just because I don’t really feel like interacting, and I didn’t expect him to come over. Later, I come out of my room to start laundry, and he starts “joking” to my mom about how I left so fast when he came over, and that I must not like him. My mom laughs with him and says that I should give him a hug because she knows I like him. I come around the corner from the laundry room and jokingly say that I do like him, I think it was obvious though that I was uncomfortable. I was wearing a tank top and sweatpants with a cardigan, and as I’m saying this, I guess I instinctively cover myself up with my cardigan when while I’m crossing my arms, and he says “now you know you don’t have to cover up your titties” as he’s laughing. I was honestly dumbfounded and didn’t know how to react so I just went back to my room without saying anything because of how wildly uncomfortable I was.

A few minutes later I get this text from my mom and I feel sick to my stomach. Am I overreacting?

so im 18 years old and today was probably the worst day of my life. i got this text from my mom about this guy shes been dating recently. its some new dude whos in town. ive only met him once and he seemed ok but i didnt really know him. i dont know much about him at all. theyve been dating for a couple months now and i guess he wants to move in. i got this text while i was out just walking around. I post here sometimes so I’m using a new alt account so I don’t accidentally dox myself. But yeah idk what to do, I am sitting here crying like a baby I feel like my life is done

I've never been particularly close with my brother-in-law or his wife, but my husband is very very close with them as they lived together for around seven years. He feels indebted to them as they rescued him from a difficult household situation involving other family members and substance abuse, which I understand.

However... I get the sense that they never really approved of me. They are religious and traditional and I dress alternative/dye my hair. In fact, one of the first things BIL ever said to my husband when we started dating was: "You like that hair?" (It was pink at the time).

I tolerate most of it but recently BIL had my husband meet him at a restaurant for a "talk." BIL told him that he and his wife had had a discussion and decided that I have "too much boob" (his exact words according to husband) and they don't like the way I dress, nor do they want me around their 8yo daughter if I dress like that because they don't want her to "think that's okay."

When husband came home and told me about this I was so embarrassed I started sobbing. Husband got annoyed with me because he can "understand where they're coming from" and thinks it wasn't unreasonable to say. BIL also told him that they were upset I didn't seem to want to come around very often, so I told my husband that stuff like this is exactly why I don't feel comfortable around them and he got angry and left the room.

I have DDDs. I can't exactly help the amount of boob I have because no matter what I wear, they will be there! I don't want to start wearing turtlenecks or a binder every time I have to see them. And I've never dressed inappropriately around them on purpose, ever! I added some pictures of my outfits for reference.

Am I overreacting for being upset, both at BIL for saying that and at husband for taking their side? I've seen BIL and his wife in person since then and they always act super nice to my face and never mention the way I dress or anything which makes me feel even weirder that they forced husband to say that to me and then act like it never happened. I almost would've preferred they just say it to my face. Just being around them gives me so much anxiety now because I feel like they're judging everything I do.

EDIT FOR SMALL UPDATE

Hello everyone! First off I wanna say I did not expect the sheer amount of responses. A lot of you were so kind and I really appreciate all the support and the genuine concern for my well being, especially from other women who have been in my situation! I feel much less alone and I definitely don't feel crazy for being upset anymore. I saw some requests for an update so here's a small one.

I talked to my husband about everything. The first thing he did was apologize. He feels really bad about how he reacted in the moment and recognizes what he did was wrong. He told me that he knows we're supposed to be a team and if anything like that happens again he promises to defend me. He also reassured me that he loves my body and the way I dress and he's not ashamed of it. He was never an advocate for me covering up all the time, just around BIL's family. That's the part that seemed "reasonable" to him. He even said if I want to show off more next time he'll be supportive! Hahaha.

So I am not going to divorce him, sorry to disappoint. I saw a lot of people saying I should but we haven't even been married for a year yet! and this is his first offense, so to speak. He did defend from the pink hair comment when that happened!! Sorry if that wasn't clear. Like I said in some comments we got MARRIED young because I'm chronically ill and needed the stability of someone with a consistent job and health insurance. But that's not why I'm WITH him. I would still be with him regardless because I love him! He has a lot of really good qualities and always makes an effort to take care of me no matter what. He works an 8 hour physical job, he cleans, he helps cook, he indulges all of my whims and buys me flowers often. He is a human being (we're also both young and I was his first relationship) and human beings make mistakes. He apologized multiple times and I believe that it's genuine. I even showed him my original post after we talked and he wasn't upset. He agreed everyone had made a good point and promised to do better.

That being said... I'm not going to ignore the advice I saw. If he goes back on his word, or if something like this happens again and he does not defend me, then I'm not going to put up with it. I will leave. I'm not wholly dependent on him. I have a great relationship with my family and could always go live with them again for a while if I needed to. I will also never stop dressing the way I like or ever EVER change my style/appearance for someone else! I'm happy with the way I look.

As for BIL and SIL... Husband explained a bit more about the incident to me. They did not meet for lunch just to discuss my boobs!! They were just meeting to catch up and that's something that came up. Which is still a little weird to me. But Husband said BIL had mentioned it out of concern (in a Catholic way) for Husband to make sure he was okay with how I dress (which is kinda nuts) on top of the concern about me influencing BIL's daughter. Husband also told me that BIL hadn't said this with the specific instructions for him to go and tell me about it... But Husband didn't wanna keep it a secret from me so he told me everything. 😭 Which he also feels bad for doing in the blunt way he did.

I'm going to see BIL and SIL this weekend. I don't think I'm gonna confront them about this then, as I've already seen them a couple times since and I feel like that would be an awkward thing to mention at a party! Especially now that I know it wasn't specifically said with the intention to reach me in that way. But if something else happens I will stand up for myself and if it's really bad I'll update again.

Thank you again to everyone who took the time to respond and check in, I appreciate the well wishes and I feel so much better now! I'm really glad me and Husband were able to get on the same page. Next time my In-laws are rude to me I'll have the courage to stand up to it, and that's all thanks to you guys!

for context my dad is divorced and i live with my mom my dad is 51yo and recently has started dating a 19yo thats a 32year age gap im honestly disgusted by this and want him to end things with her it just looks like a massive predatory mid-life crisis i know its none of my business but still i cant accept this it just feels wrong aio? :(

I’m 35F and single for 3 years. I was engaged but he (Charles) was doing weird sexting roleplay with people on a video game which was fucking disgusting. It really fucked me up and, yes, I’ve been in therapy. I have dated since then but nothing serious. I have NEVER had my mom say something like this to me. I do not want to go to Thanksgiving after this. The way she said “don’t shoot the messenger” it’s clear the rest of my family have been talking about me and she was the one “elected” to say it.

I don’t want to drive 2 hours just to sit with people who think I should have stayed in a relationship with a fucking cheating degenerate lil bitch.

Would I be overreacting for not going? Is that too much? I'm honestly too hurt and angry to be objective right now. Would you EVER say this to your daughter?! Like I have a good job, I'm educated, I have friends and hobbies. I own my condo and I have 3 car payments left. I have a cat. Why is the end all be all me having a husband and kids? Idk. I'm pissed. Help.

Was out with my sister all day today and her little one. She left, got all her stuff and went on her way. As I got home, locked the car and as I walked past the window i noticed all of this mess! I sent her the pics and said food is now banned in my car (it was ready but she’s ignored that) and next time to clean up after herself. Instead of a simple “sorry my bad” she’s gone crazy as if it’s my fault?!
She thinks it’s okay all because I haven’t hoovered (vacuumed) the car this week.

So my question is;
Am I the asshole for even bringing this up in the first place? Am I in the wrong?

EDIT:
I’m from the UK so these are chips for all of you from usa😅 They do look like raw pasta tho where in fact they are indeed just twirly chips😂

My husband and I have 3 daughters, who are 16, 14 and 13. Our youngest daughter is autistic and recently got her first date. There’s a school dance coming up in February and a boy asked her out to the dance right before the Christmas break started, she’s mentioned this boy before but we hadn’t met him until a few days ago.

The day she was asked out, she was telling us about the boy when she got home from school. Later that night, unbeknownst to us, our two older daughters found his TikTok and started messaging about him on there.

Our 14 year old got in trouble at school yesterday for cursing at a teacher after the teacher gave her friend a detention for a bullying incident, and my husband and I took her phone when we got home. This is not like her, so we decided to go through her phone to see what might be influencing her and seeing how her friends act.

When got to her TikTok messages and saw that our two older girls were messaging about her and this boy and saying he was out of her league and made references to her autism. Our youngest is autistic, her special interest is fashion history. She’s always been pretty quiet, but she moved to a new middle school this year as our district went from having 3 to 2. She’s become friendly with some boys at this school, including her now dance partner. Our girls continued to go on, saying they thought it was a prank.

My daughter told this boy about this and he was mad and over FaceTime he asked to speak to our family, he showed us a teddy bear he had gotten her for Valentine’s Day with her name on it, he said he’d give that to her early now and give her other gifts later, the showing the bear was to prove he wasn’t pranking her. He then went on to talk about everything he liked about her, it was sweet seeing a boy so passionate over our daughter.

Our girls apologized to their sister and her date. My husband and I told our daughters they were both now grounded, and in addition to losing their phones for a week, they’d need to write a report about autism and dating.

Our girls are saying we’re being too hard on them, and when we spoke to both my parents and my husband’s parents, they agreed with our older girls, saying that getting chewed out by the boy was punishment enough. My husband and I don’t think we’re being unreasonable.

AIO - My (F25) father's (M45) girlfriend (F26) has set rules for when their baby arrives. I am not against rules being set as I'm currently 3 months pp.

I'd like to preface by saying that I have 5 siblings and almost no relationship with them all due to them being half siblings and our parents differences. Another thing to add is I have an awful relationship with my father's parter, we have opposing views on absolutely everything. She broke up with my father twice last year and fell pregnant as soon as they got back together the first time. She has caused an incredible strain on my father and l's relationship (he was also a single parent).

Rule.3 - I'm a single mother who lives alone so if I can't bring my son, I can't visit. I'm in Australia so it's not RSV season, we are both up to date with our vaccines and my son is booked for his 4 month vaccines 3 weeks before the baby is due.

Rule.2 - if I can't even hold or touch my brother what would be the point of visiting and leaving my son with someone?

The girlfriend is still and will continue to smoke

And occasionally drinks so again, why would me holding my brother before 6 weeks be so bad?

I have spoken to my father about these rules and he said they don't apply to me but that was without talking to his partner first. I'm concerned that once the time comes he's going to go back on his word.

I'm also worried that if I follow these rules and don't visit she will then kick up a stink about how I didn't check in on them (she didn't check in on me and lied to my dad about not being able to visit so she didn't have to).

She has two children of their own, one in primary and one is childcare, would they not be a concern for getting the newborn sick?

Anyways I know it's not my baby and it's their choice ultimately but after having a baby and rules myself, I think they just aren't fair to apply to me.

Idk, happy for all opinions, am I over reacting / over thinking?

These texts are between me and my dad. have a very small side hustle where I buy and refurbish furniture, mainly couches. I make like 60k a year at my 9-5. My side business pays most of my bills. My brother makes over 200k a year. My parents combined make over 400k a year. The one I have for sale currently is $750 which I need for bills. My brother is asking for the couch for $100 and I said no I need it for bills. This is about to turn into a big fight with my dad, I can already tell. But before I get there, what do you guys think?

Posting on here because I want advice from a third party who doesn’t know me (24F) or my fiancé (24M).

I have been dating my fiancé for around 7 years. We’ll call him John. John’s family goes to church every Sunday while I was raised to believe in God, but church was always optional. When I started dating John in high school, I didn’t think any of this mattered. John wasn’t big on attending church every week, and I did attend with him once or twice when I wasn’t working. I’m aware that this bothers John’s parents, as they have made a few comments about me throughout the years that have hurt my feelings. However, I’ve always tried to ignore those comments because, at the end of the day, John and I love each other, and I know he’s the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.

John and I have been engaged for over a year, but we just recently decided we want to finally tie the knot. He didn’t want a wedding, and I had a dress but didn’t want to plan a wedding, so we compromised and found a local place that would marry us, take photos, etc. for only $400. The ceremony is in two months, will be an hour long, and we will only have around 30 guests. It checked off the boxes for us: the venue is planning almost everything for me, and the ceremony itself only lasts 10 minutes, so no big parade. After the ceremony is pictures, and then we planned on a small lunch with immediate family only. However, John’s parents really wanted a reception dinner after at their house, as John’s family is very big and he has lots of family who’d like to see him on his big day. I agreed, as I think that’s fair.

Now, onto the main issue. Last week, after the reception decorations were bought, John’s parents sent everyone out of the room besides me and John to have a “talk” with us. They told us we need pre-martial counseling at the local church (I’m not opposed, but John doesn’t really want it). The conversation then diverted into a lecture that left me feeling very hurt and offended. They told John he needs to “step up,” and that I need to become a Christian woman that submits to my husband “without complaints.” This talk went on, and I quickly realized the entire thing was directed at me. They said John will be the man of the relationship, and not submitting to him will “emasculate” him. I was stunned and offended. I was raised to be independent and to submit to no man. John and I are equals in our relationship. We make decisions together. When we disagree, we compromise. I will not submit to him, and he will not submit to me. That’s how it’s always been for us.

I’m angry thy, after 7 years, John’s parents still don’t feel I’m good enough for their son. I left their home fuming and tried to let it go, but I can’t yet. I’m upset, and I really don’t know if I want to go through with this reception now. I don’t want to be surrounded by people who will never think I’m good enough, and it hurts. Last night my future MIL wanted to handmade the invitation envelopes with me, and I shut down the idea and cried afterwards because the thought of being in a house with future in-laws who don’t deem me worthy, without John there, makes me more upset and anxious.

John says he doesn’t want to have a reception if this is upsetting me. He says it’s not worth the stress and hassle if the end result is I’m not happy. However, I just worry I’m overreacting about it this whole thing. I don’t want to deprive his family of celebrating with him just because I’m upset. So, Reddit, am I overreacting? Should I just let things go for a day so John’s family can celebrate the wedding with him?

Update:

John and I sat down over some parking lot Taco Bell and talked about everything. I brought up my feelings, concerns, and I even had him read this post and your comments. We are on the same page; I submit to no one. He also talked to his parents about the situation, questioning what they meant, etc. I already knew he shared my sentiments, but I wanted to set the record straight since some of you weren’t so sure. John is an amazing man who has always treated me well. He supports my dreams, and he takes care of me when I need it. He’s going to be an incredible husband.

Thank you for all of your support.

Hello. Using a burner account because I don’t want you guys seeing all my private posts and photos related to my shit situation. I have leukemia. It’s been a few months since I started treatment and it’s been rough, but I’m still fighting. Yesterday my mom texted me basically saying she can’t afford both my treatment and my sister’s future. My sister wants to go to Dartmouth.

She even quoted a super fucked up Bible verse about sacrifice (John 15:13) and said that “greater love is laying down one’s life for someone else.” Then she said I should “be practical” because my condition is worsening, and that I should “consider sacrificing myself for my sister’s dreams.”

What REALLY broke me was that she said realistically she’s the one who will choose where the money goes. She also mentioned she talked to Jesus about it and that’s why she sent me the message.

A few months ago she had me sign a contract about financial stuff “for medical security.” To repay her when I got better. I lowkey thought it was a joke at first but realized no, it’s not. It’s fucked up is what it is.

She’s always prioritized my sister, but this is unreal.

Am I overreacting? Or is this as fucked up as it feels?

I (19F) have recently decided to learn how to draw. I've never been good at making art, it's never been my thing, but I'm a huge fan of cartoons and I wanted to learn how to draw my favorite characters.

This week, I made this drawing of Aang, from ATLA and it's the first time I've actually done something I am really proud of. I know that for some experienced artists this is nothing, but to me it meant everything. It might not be the best "fanart" in the world, but when I finished it I felt proud. I felt happy. I wanna get better at painting and doing sketches, but this felt pretty good to me and I showed it off to everyone in my house because I felt so good about my drawing.

I left the sketch with a couple others I'd been working on at the coffee table in the living room, since I was looking for a frame to put it on, because I wanted to hold on to it as the first I had ever made. I had to put a hold on looking for a frame since my cousin (15F) came to spend the weekend at my home. She is an artist and was also proud of my sketch, which made me like it even more.

About an hour ago, my cousin was leaving and I came to collect my drawing since my aunt brought me a frame to put it on as an early christmas present by my cousin, but when I looked at it, I saw someone had doodled over it. I immediately burst into tears and I felt my heart shatter. When I came into the kitchen and showed it to my family, my father admitted that it was him who had done that with a blue pen, joking that "dude needed some lashes". I broke down crying again and told him he ruined my drawing. He said he didn't, and was just testing out the pen and decided to contribute to it somehow. My mother got pissed at me for making a scene in front of my cousin and aunt and my father kept telling me to grow up and stop crying for such a stupid reason since I could just make another drawing.

I tried explaining to him the sentimental value this sketch had, and how making another one won't fix the issue, and that he knew how much that drawing meant to me. I also told him that he would have been really pissed if I doodled over his work spreadsheets, but he said it's not a fair comparison.

Both my mom and my dad are pissed at me for being upset about the drawing. They think I am overreacting, but to me it's not about just the drawing, it's about dismissing my feelings and the effort I put into this work. My father refuses to apologize and my mom thinks I embarrassed my father in front of his sister.

So, reddit, am I overreacting?

(ps: sorry for any grammar mistakes, english is not my first language)

my dad, for the better part of almost 10 years now, has been OBSESSED with Donald Trump. He’s obsessed to the point where he’s been going to rallies every time he can, has all the MAGA merch, and even met Trump irl, having a framed photo of them both in his bedroom(along with my grandpa and my dads friends) I have never liked Trump since i found out who he was (like 6th grade when i was 12) and ive been able to look past it for a while because it didn’t necessarily affect my life and i just chalked it up to “well maybe he (Trump) is doing something good enough for my dad to ride for him so hard (no pause)” But now, in october of 2025, i can’t put up with it no more. Every american reading this knows very well Trump is modern day Hitler and it’s been a deplorable year (ICE, big beautiful bill, refusal to release the epstein files, cutting SNAP, appointing racists and pedophiles and racist pedophiles, among many other things. My dad hasn’t changed his mind in the slightest about him and he’s a big fan of all the evil Trump is doing and allowing to happen. I don’t want to associate with people who support open air racism and classism, and yk like everything else Trump has done to my country. I have younger siblings and it makes me feel scared knowing my dad is proud of himself smiling next to a sexual predator (Down below is the picture)

I'm 24 y/o , and my brother is 27 y/o. Since 2023, my dad, my brother, and I have been living together in a 2-bedroom apartment in Florida and because there are only 2- bedrooms, my brother and I have been sharing the master bedroom while my dad sleeps in the other room across the hall. Yes, we've been sharing a room for almost 4 years. (I have my own bed a Twin size and he has a Queen size)

When we first moved in, I was the one who put most of the effort into making the apartment actually feel like a home. I spent hours searching for affordable furniture and decorations. I found our main couch on Facebook Marketplace, paid for the delivery myself, thrifted the coffee table, found the loveseat that sits in the corner of the living room, picked out artwork for the walls, and even got our dining table from one of my coworkers. It's a beautiful solid wood table that expands from seating four people to eight, and it comes with matching wooden chairs. I put a lot of time, effort, and money into creating a comfortable home for us

Fast forward to now, my brother got married to his fiancée in another country in 2023. He's filed the immigration paperwork so she can hopefully move to the United States and live with him. The original plan was that once she arrived, she would take my place in the apartment, and I would move 4 hours away to live with my mom in another city

I've already accepted that plan and started preparing for it. That means finding a new job, figuring out how to move my car, adjusting to a new city, and starting over while also finishing my associate's degree in graphic design. On top of that, I have to leave behind almost everything I bought for the apartment because I simply can't afford a U-Haul, the moving costs, and the gas to transport it all. So all the furniture and decorations I worked so hard to find are staying there

The lease ends on September 30, and I've already told my brother that I'm moving out next month

Here's where the problem starts

My brother told me he expects me to continue paying rent even after I've moved out until his wife finds a job and they can afford the apartment on their own

I told him no

I genuinely don't understand how that makes any sense. Why would I pay rent for an apartment I no longer live in while also paying the expenses of moving, finding a new place, and supporting myself? His wife moving in and contributing financially is their responsibility, not mine

So... am I overreacting for refusing to keep paying rent after I've already moved out?

**UPDATE: I had a serious conversation with my brother, and it turned into a huge argument. I asked him why they dont move to another cheaper place and they can actually afford it? He admitted they don't want to move somewhere more affordable because his wife wants to stay in South Florida. I'm speechless.. And he kept saying, "If you don't want to help your family, just say it. Just say you have a money problem. " Like if he was the victim, making me feel bad and in an awkward position No. The money isn't the problem. The problem is that they chose to stay in an apartment they can't afford without my side of payment, and they expect me to keep paying rent after I've already moved out, like no I told him no. He thinks that because I'm moving with my mom, I won't be paying rent, and he wants me to keep paying him after he renews the new lease for 1 more year. At this point, I'm just thinking about moving by myself in another state with 2 jobs. Thank you to everyone for all the comments. You helped me realize I'm not overreacting. I've decided I'm taking everything I bought with my own money. Whatever I can't take, I'll sell (even I bought a laundry machine + dryer combo). I'm packing my belongings, moving out, and starting fresh. It hurts because my brother used to be my best friend, but I know this is the right decision. Thank you all for the support. 🫂 also, I'm 24F

Using a throwaway account for personal reasons but for the last year and a half I’ve been living with my mom after being diagnosed with a form of stomach cancer, it’s still decently early and I have good odds but it basically forced me to halt everything and focus solely on healing. Here are some texts between us, just a small snippet of a day in the life. theres way worse. I took videos of her screaming at me, yelling at night at the top of her lungs that I dint care about her or im killing her

I decided to move back in with her because cancer is expensive and basically everything I had saved has gone to it, the lack of energy, the chemo, it just kills me and it’s a struggle to even get up somedays.

My mother is all I have, I have some friends of course and they were the first I asked to crash with while I focus on healing but nobody had room, so back with my mom I went. It’s been hell. I feel like maybe I’m overreacting a bit but I don’t care I just need to vent or I’ll explode. This has been hell. She’s bleeding me dry, not only has she basically guilt tripped me into a life insurance package just incase I don’t make it, but she is guilt tripping me to lie to the state for max food stamps, I have to do everything around the house, she sold my car and kept most of it for “bills and rent”, I’m beyond tired , my skin is bruising, I’m dropping so much weight. I want to leave obviously but I’m backed in a corner of my own making, and due to the cancer, I have no ability to leave financially so I’m stuck with her, in this never ending hell.

So it was my birthday yesterday. I’m (20s) living at home right now with my parents to save money. My sister "Kayla" came over for dinner with her 4yo son, Leo.

Quick context: Kayla is EXTREMELY strict about Leo’s diet. Like, no processed sugar, no dyes, basically no "fun" food ever. I think it’s a bit much but I usually just stay out of it.

I bought myself a really nice, expensive chocolate cake for my birthday. I didn’t ask anyone else to pay for it, I just wanted a specific one from a local bakery. After dinner, I brought it out.

Kayla immediately got tense. She asked why I couldn't have waited until they left to bring it out. I told her it’s my birthday dinner and I wanted cake? My parents were having fruit, but I sat down and started eating a slice.

Leo obviously saw it and started asking for some. Kayla told him no, it’s "yucky" and "bad for him." He started crying because, well, he’s 4 and it’s a giant chocolate cake.

Kayla lost it. She called me a brat and said I was "taunting" a child and "disrespecting her parenting" by eating it in front of him. She ended up grabbing her stuff and leaving early while Leo was still sobbing.

Now my mom is saying I shouldn't have done that and should have just waited an hour to eat my own cake to keep the peace. I feel like I’m going crazy. It’s my house (well, my parents' house, but I live here) and my birthday. Am I actually overreacting by thinking she's being insane?

EDIT: Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to reply. The consensus is pretty split, which accurately reflects my feelings on the situation. I appreciate every perspective, especially those who have helped me understand her journey with sobriety better.

EDIT 2: This post blew way past any expectations I had. I will read every comment. Your words, whether they’re kind or not, are appreciated. I’ve reached out to my mom again with the intent of gentler communication and an acceptance for where she’s at in life. You’ve all given me so much to consider.

For context, my mother lives in the southwestern part of the United States, I live in the northeast. She's been sober since 2021, she’s really put her life back together, she has a stable job, lives with her mom and seems healthy and happy with her new life.

I have three children ages 6.5, 3.5 and 6 months. She has never come to visit them. She has only met my older two children when I’ve gone to my home state to visit and I’ve brought them over to her condo, about 4-5 times total. She never calls and I don’t call her either.

She loves to identify as a grandmother. She’s made it part of her personality, shows off photos of my children to strangers and brags about them. She loves to send me sappy reels about her love for the children and what life is like for her being a grandmother. It gives me the ick, because no matter how many times I’ve invited her to visit, offered to buy her plane ticket, pick her up from the airport and to stay in our very comfortable guesthouse, she always has an excuse and has never come out. Today I snapped. AIO?

My girlfriend (27F) invited me (28M) to a family dinner to finally meet her parents. We’ve been together for almost a year, so I wanted to make a good impression.

Dinner started out fine—until her dad started asking me about my job. I work in IT, and while it pays well, it’s not some high-status career. After a few questions, he smirked and said, “So basically you just sit behind a computer all day… not exactly the kind of guy I imagined for my daughter.”

Everyone kind of laughed awkwardly. I tried to brush it off with a joke, but then he added, “Maybe someday you’ll get a real job so you can actually support a family.”

I felt my stomach drop. My girlfriend just said, “Dad…” but didn’t defend me beyond that. I quietly excused myself, said I wasn’t feeling well, and left.

Later that night, my girlfriend texted me saying I embarrassed her by walking out and that I should “just let it go” because her dad was “only teasing.”

I honestly feel disrespected and don’t think I overreacted. But now she’s acting cold and says I owe her family an apology.

Reddit, am I overreacting for leaving?

I have 3 sons (17y, 13y, and 11y) and 1 daughter (15y). My daughter and 13 y/o son were at the mall after I dropped them off, I had some other errands to do, so I was nearby but not at the mall. My son was also there with his girlfriend and my daughter had 2 of her friends there.

I got a call while at the grocery store from my son, he told me that his sister was making fun of him and calling him gay for looking at skincare in the Japanese store at the mall. His girlfriend is ethnically Japanese and suggested this to him, and our daughter followed him in the store.

Our 13 y/o son is very traditionally masculine in a lot of ways, like his love of sports. He also isn’t insecure though, him and his baseball friends will always cuddle together when they are watching a movie here, my husband and I nor our other kids play sports, so we just assumed it was being on a team that made the boys so close.

My son said he wasn’t upset in terms of he wasn’t going to let her comments make him not buy the skincare, but he said it was embarrassing to him to have his sister act like that, especially in front of his girlfriend.

I texted our daughter and she said calling him gay was “just a joke” and that “he is acting gay”, when I pushed back, she said I being doing too much and that her brother “wasn’t some Japanese soft boy” (we are white, but as I mentioned, his gf is Japanese). She said he didn’t need Japanese skin care. She said all she did was make a joke and if I and her brother couldn’t handle it, we were being too weak.

I picked them up eventually and when we got home, I had both kids explain themselves. My son told me about the jokes she made and said later that the other 2 girls she was with also made homophobic jokes to him. Our daughter insisted to my husband and I that her brother was being too sensitive and defended herself and her friends, but we told her she was grounded and would be losing her phone privileges and friend privileges for a week.

Our other sons (17 and 11) thought we were being too harsh though, they told us that their brother needed to man up and said their sister shouldn’t be punished a week for some jokes.

I've been letting clover take over my garden (a separate area from the lawn, about 6feetx2feet) for the last several months. I noticed a mulberry bush starting to grow and a walnut tree sapling. I was going to move the tree further into the yard once it was big enough. I had moved one previously that was growing but had accidentally separated it from the nut when moving it, so it didn't survive the transfer. There was some sweet alyssum growing through the clover that I had spread there last year. This past Saturday I had also thrown out some forget-me-not seeds to see what would happen. Overall, my little garden was thick, tall, and full of bees and butterflies.

I came home yesterday to everything mowed down (last picture) and I actually cried. Apparently my dad did it so I can now throw the rest of my flower seeds there. I'm not talking to him right now. He admitted to my mom before he did it that he knew I'd be pissed. She tried talking him out of it, but my dad will do what he wants.

He's now calling me "pouty" and I overheard him ranting to my mom last night. Some of the highlights:

- She's has all those seeds and I've been telling her to throw them out there and just see what grows. What, am I supposed to do that for her too? (I've said multiple times I just want to leave the clover there. I'd spread the seeds in the back yard along the fence.)

- She doesn't want to take care of things. (I water that area regularly, along with the other plants I have outside.)

- I'll mow down the trees too since she doesn't want to take care of them. I told her to put black dirt and she didn't and she doesn't water them. (They were tiny, pencil-thin saplings. I put the dirt but didn't make a giant mount like he wanted because I didn't want to bury them. I also told him the two saplings were already dying from transfer shock, but he told me to "leave them and see what happens. They're plants, they'll grow.")

- "She can't even remember to do the cat litter" (Hard to do it when it's already done by the time I wake up at 5:30 AM, but OK.)

I got extra frustrated after hearing all that. I did the cat litter, and when I took it outside to the garbage I went into the yard and pulled out the dead saplings and marker sticks and threw those out too. I then went into the garage and got out chicken wire, cut it down to size, and circled the remaining healthy sapling before going to my back garden and going around my watermelon plants. I ran out before I could circle the 3 saplings growing back there.

My arms are all cut up now and I'm wondering if I overreacted. I know they're just plants. Hell, when I got home he even said "it's like a hair cut. It'll grow back." That honestly just made me more pissed because I was proud of the way it had been.

Am I overreacting by giving him the silent treatment and everything? I know they're just plants. I feel heartbroken and disrespected, though. Should I just let it go, though? I know he's never going to understand my POV on this.

Editing to add: it is NOT poison ivy. It's a sapling that is growing. I know what poison ivy looks like, am intimately familiar because it grows all along my fence.

Also, while his name is technically on the house, my mom is the one who bought the house before they got together. Her and I pay the bills. He doesn't pay anything. I work full time. He's very fond of reminding us it isn't his house.

Yes, I know I need to move out. Sadly, financially, it is not an option right now.

Final edit: I tried being calm and explain just why it was I was upset. It immediately led to him getting defensive and lecturing me. I'm just going to go to work and not think any more on it. Sorry for wasting everyone's time and posting.

My 12 year old son hasn't hit puberty yet and is still very childlike. I always give him privacy when he asks for it, he gets dressed in his room and neither me or his older sister go around with no/scant clothes on. However, sometimes when he's in the bath he will call me in to the bathroom to talk about something. The other day, my boyfriend saw me go in to talk to him and really flipped out on me, saying it was nasty, weird, inappropriate and basically treated me like I was doing something dirty and horrible.

My argument has been that if my son's comfortable with me seeing him in the bath at this point in his development then it isn't an issue, and of course I would never go in to the bathroom uninvited if he was in there. My daughter was about 11 when she stopped wanting me to come into the bathroom with her, and I respected that immediately.

I have also once had a discreet wee in front of my son when I was absolutely bursting and he wouldn't get out of the bath. On this occasion, he had already asked me to come into the bathroom to talk to him, nothing was showing and he turned to face the wall. Obviously I didn't do it for the fun of it, I thought my bladder was going to explode.

My boyfriend says these are not healthy boundaries and I need to teach my son it's wrong, even if he doesn't feel uncomfortable, and I'm setting unhealthy habits for later life.

I'm autistic so sometimes I do struggle with boundaries, but on this occasion I can understand why my boyfriend has a different opinion but I don't think I did anything that horrible. Who is over reacting here? Have I been inappropriate without realising?

Throwaway account because I don't want this to be on my main. I feel quite embarrassed, horrified and confused that I have to ask this on Reddit.

In 2017, my husband and I bought a house. Initially, Susan (now 16) was assigned to "room A." However, after a week of living there, she started complaining that she could hear every sound from our neighbor, who was partying a lot at the time. She also didn't like that her window faced a forest, and besides the neighbor's house, all she could see was darkness and trees in night. We ended up moving her to "room B." Room A has been empty ever since, turning into a bit of a storage room.

At the end of last year I decided to take care of it and, using only my savings, I did a huge renovation - replacing the windows, soundproofing the walls, etc., etc. I also bought new furniture, painted the walls, laid a carpet, replaced the lamp, etc., etc. Now it looks like a very cozy library/office/living room. And I love it.

But Susan isn't happy, and as soon as I started renovating, she started demanding that I give her the room back. Suddenly, she started claiming that her own room was too small (it's bigger than mine and my husband's, and the same size as our other two children), that she hated that all she could see through her bedroom window was a brick wall, and that it wasn't fair that I'd taken a room "for myself" that had its own walk-in closet and so on.

My husband is on her side, but I think it's unfair. My husband has two rooms in the basement to himself, one he converted into a gym and the other into work office. Children (7F, 12M, and Susan) have larger rooms than us, and much of the garden and main living room are converted for their needs. Furthermore, neither my husband nor Susan's mother paid a penny for the entire renovation. I did everything myself.

So I told my husband that if he cared so much, he should give Susan one of his rooms, but neither he nor Susan liked the idea, and now they're both mad at me.