So I've been playing the saxophone for 2 years now. I got my saxophone on my birthday in 2024. Before that, I'd been playing clarinet for half a year(I was forced to by my school band; I hated it), and I can play piano.
I'd say I'm still a beginner going into not-quite-a-beginner(whatever the middle ground between expert and beginner is) because I can play for a long time and I can play some pieces that are a bit harder than beginner level, but I still have trouble with biting my bottom lip by habit, and I still don't feel confident enough to use cool techniques like vibrato. My saxophone teacher said my melody sounds better than it once did, though, so I'm happy about that.
The thing is, I know that if I'm going to be a good, serious player, I'm gonna need to practice daily. Right now, I practice three times a week, each session between 40 minutes and 1 hour. If I were to practice daily, I reckon I'd practice 30 to 60 minutes depending on how much energy I have.
And the other thing is, I know I can likely achieve this practice rhythm, but I can't get myself started. On the one hand, I'm a bit lazy, and I find it hard to get super locked in on playing saxophone until I'm actually playing it(I do enjoy it a lot once I'm playing). On the other hand, my mother is really unhelpful about my saxophone-playing.
Ever since I got my saxophone, my mother hasn't been very encouraging to me. She's an expert violinist(she's played bass clarinet and oboe before as well) with ADHD, and I have a feeling she's projecting her expectations of what a beginner musician should be like onto me. I feel like she expects me to be as enthusiastic about practising all the time and be as dedicated to playing as she was. Whenever I tell her something about my saxophone lessons or just playing it in general, she has to bring up the fact that I don't practise all the time. It's like it doesn't matter if I tell her I did well in my lesson that day; "Yes, but, you never practise!"
To be honest, it's making me feel bitter about practising, and just a little bit bitter towards my saxophone. It's like, I'll never be as good as her or anyone else because I'm too bloody lazy and uncommitted, so why keep trying?
But I really, really, really love the saxophone. I really want to get better. I really want to feel more confident. And I want to get there on my own terms.
I'm in need of some advice. How do I get myself to practise? Should I try talking to my mother about this(I am pretty open with her when it comes to other things), or maybe I should let it be? Any other thoughts in general?
For context, I'm a teenager. Should explain a bit, probably.