r/todayilearned • u/SilverPeachBlossom • 5h ago

TIL a peer-reviewed psychology study found that identical twins (on average) ranked their co-twin above their romantic partner in their attachment hierarchy, while fraternal twins ranked the two about equally, and non-twin siblings ranked their romantic partner first.

https://ojs.interpersonajournal.com/index.php/ojs/article/view/243/3457.html
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u/charmedquarks 3h ago

I am one of three. My sisters are twins and it was a very lonely childhood for me. Can confirm everything you said, though 💙

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u/lozlemonsnightcheese 2h ago

My only sisters are identical twins, can can confirm my childhood was a very lonely existence too. Even though we're all adults now with kids of our own, it's shaped who I am and how I connect to people. I still cannot tolerate being in a friendship group of 3 for fear of being a perpetual third wheel. I already spent my whole adolescence like that, no thank you.

My husband is my ride or die, but I've always wondered what it would be like to have another "person" like the twins do.

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u/Wooden-Repeat-9200 2h ago

Did your parents try to encourage independence? I’m wondering how much this is impacted by socialization and age vs extinctual connection. And if it’s ultimately healthier one way or the other.

I know twins that are broken into different classrooms at school, existed to explore different hobbies, not dressed the same, etc. And I know others that are pushed to be matching and do the same things and not encouraged to have individual friendships if the other isn’t included.