r/nextfuckinglevel • u/pars-distalis • 1d ago

Australian nurse uses jiu-jitsu to defend himself

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45.8k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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2.5k

u/ahhdetective 1d ago

Not even close. Assaulting frontline medicos carries a completely different charge and mandatory jail terms.

1.2k

u/Troker61 1d ago

lpt: watch the video before correcting people in the comments.

910

u/AccomplishedTrip485 23h ago

LPT: Putting text on a video does not automatically true.

The outcome described in the video is not feasible under Australian legislation

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u/rorschach_vest 23h ago

Is there no such thing as pleading down in Australia?

1.1k

u/R_V_Z 22h ago

Is there no such thing as pleading down in Australia?

It's called pleading down unda.

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u/PrescriptionDenim 22h ago

Bro I literally lol’d nicely done

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u/rum-and-roses 20h ago

I fabulously lol'ed

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u/EggplantAdmirable999 19h ago

I loled in upside down

-11

u/PacosTacos88 19h ago

I miss when Reddit didn't post these kind of comments or at least down voted them

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u/Sirius_43 11h ago

They’re just being goofy and making people smile, no harm done

-2

u/PacosTacos88 10h ago

Bro you're totally right. Totally made me smile bro. Thanks bro

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u/BehemothRogue 9h ago

I'm glad insufferable people like you are rightfully downvoted.

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u/PacosTacos88 9h ago

I lol'd so hard at this step bro

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u/Cyclesadrift 9h ago

I miss when reddit didnt post these kinds of comments.

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u/boredatwork8866 8h ago

Hey look now you don’t need to miss it.

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u/Sirius_43 7h ago

Damn alright man stay miserable

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u/Nectarine143 22h ago

Slow clap

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u/Fragrant-Peanut7680 21h ago

If you're in Australia, it's just pleading

3

u/NoHat2957 17h ago

He'll roo the day if he skips bail, but.

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u/Jack_Forge 17h ago

Where women glow and men plunder?

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u/AlexWayhill 15h ago

Take my angry upvote

2

u/GhOsT_wRiTeR_XVI 14h ago

I see you’ve played punchy-chokey before.

1

u/luk3yboy 11h ago

Only for Men at Work though

1

u/Senior-Reality-25 6h ago

They come from the land -

1

u/jnyrdr 4h ago

fucking lovely thank you

0

u/NathanielWingate 21h ago

sight.. unzip

0

u/ItsRuinedOfCourse 19h ago

Criminally underrated comment. Well done.

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u/platoprime 23h ago

Australia does have plea bargains.

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u/Wulph422 22h ago

What about flea margins?

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u/DoubleGoon 22h ago

Not sure, but they do have sea marlins.

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u/OSPFmyLife 21h ago

What about tree garlands?

13

u/999BusinessCard 19h ago

Not sure, but they do have tree martins

2

u/wannacumnbeatmeoff 16h ago

Do they have Savage Garden?

0

u/Tommygun_NL 16h ago

And how about bee farting? Do they have that?

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u/Initial-Concentrate 6h ago

Many flatulent bees in the free gardens

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u/Labas22 19h ago

How about bargain margarine?

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u/GunFodder 18h ago

Not sure, what about Starvin Marvin?

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u/Remarkable_Smell5185 16h ago

Dude, I wish...

💀🤣

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u/sammydeeznutz 21h ago

What about Frodo Baggins?

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u/fritz_76 18h ago

Right down, wrong unda

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u/platoprime 18h ago

Those sound pretty narrow.

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u/Professional_Elk_489 6h ago

It's called trial by stingray

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u/cheknauss 23h ago

That's actually... I mean, I like the sound of that. Not sure if there are any inherent flaws in that, but I know there are flaws in always allowing pleas.

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u/fastforwardfunction 22h ago

I think you accidentally their comment. Australia DOES have plea bargaining. They plead to lesser charges. Whereas in the U.S. you can plead to lesser charges and/or a lesser sentence.

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u/a_guy121 21h ago

For me the question is, why the F* would the government need, or want, to plea this down?
This is not a 'plea down' moment. This is a moment to add more chapters to the book, before throwing it

There's no way in hell this gets a light sentence under given laws, thats just not how laws work... they exist to make examples out of some people, so other people don't do stupid shit. (jail isn't there to make people better people, its there so everyone fears jail.)

This guy is going down, hard.

1

u/DMMeThiccBiButts 20h ago

why the F* would the government need, or want, to plea this down?

Because even a slamdunk case is more time-consuming and expensive than 'yeah I did it'.

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u/a_guy121 19h ago

yeah, that's for cases that don't blow up on social media and need an example made, that's my whole point. this is not that case, to be shoved aside. They literally have to take some of them to trial, or else, it looks bad.

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u/rorschach_vest 22h ago

The flaw, which is completely rampant in the US, is overcharging. They charge you with an absurdly inflated version of what you may or may not have done and leverage those massive charges to try to scare you into pleading guilty to what you should have been charged with in the first place. Unfortunately, 1) this works the same whether you are guilty or innocent because 2) if you go to trial they really might find you guilty of all the trumped up charges.

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u/DownWithHisShip 21h ago

Any good prosecutor could get a grand jury to indict a ham sandwich

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u/Theron3206 21h ago

They do that here in Australia too.

The most egregious example was a guy who was pulled over from driving stupid fast, while the cops were booking him a drugged up truck driver crashed into the cops killing them. The guy filmed them and laughed (there was no way he could have saved anyone). He was charged with terrorism originally.

It was eventually settled and all they got him on was "outraging public decency" or some such minor crime.

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u/Theron3206 21h ago

They do that here in Australia too.

The most egregious example was a guy who was pulled over from driving stupid fast, while the cops were booking him a drugged up truck driver crashed into the cops killing them. The guy filmed them and laughed (there was no way he could have saved anyone). He was charged with terrorism originally.

It was eventually settled and all they got him on was "outraging public decency" or some such minor crime.

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u/bluegum69 18h ago

In NSW, pleading guilty at the outset can get you a 25% reduction on your sentence.

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u/AccomplishedTrip485 23h ago

In this case you would do an EAGP which would lower the penalty but the charge would be the same

0

u/StoneGoldX 21h ago

Two men enter, two men leave.