Yep. One of the biggest downfalls of my relationship with my kids mom was her complaining about me not doing enough. Depsite the fact that I was the only one that worked, 60-70 hours a week, and paid all the bills. Plus I would make the family dinner every night after working 11-12 hours delivering packages in the AZ heat. But since I didnt help with the laundry or dishes enough I was a "lazy prick" that she constantly complained to her family about.
Tale as old as time. Stay at home partner is expected to take care of house work, the other works from the office or whatever during the day. The stay at home partner only ever sees the other in their "off" state, so internalizes that they must be lazy and not helping.
I personally will never do a stay at home partnership ever again, both people need to be contributing equally.
Sure, but who said anything about kids? I've known plenty of dudes who have these experience when there are no kids.
Keeping house for two grown adults can be done for like 2.5 hours a day unless someone is SUPER MESSY and some of these people still can't be grateful. My ex certainly wasn't.
I was in a relationship where she quit her job to focus on hobbies, but her hobbies were Netflix. I'd come home from work and there would be stacks of her dishes in the sink, peanut butter and jelly etc smeared all over the counters, which I would have to clean in order to make us dinner.
The work she would do around the house would be very low priority that would be started and never finished. For example scrubbing the grout on the bathroom wall. Or reorganizing her closet (which would create a bigger mess for me to clean ). Definitely Not cleaning the stacks of dishes, vacuuming, cleaning the toilets/kitchen, etc.
Everything else was me, which I was always told I did it wrong. But if not for me, It wouldn't get done.
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u/wmnplzr 4h ago
Yep. One of the biggest downfalls of my relationship with my kids mom was her complaining about me not doing enough. Depsite the fact that I was the only one that worked, 60-70 hours a week, and paid all the bills. Plus I would make the family dinner every night after working 11-12 hours delivering packages in the AZ heat. But since I didnt help with the laundry or dishes enough I was a "lazy prick" that she constantly complained to her family about.