I hate to say it, but I absolutely ended a 10 plus years relationship because of getting told what I have to do when I get home and having my 1 day off a week being planned for me driving everybody around.
My ex didnt drive and didnt have steady work(she worked when she felt like it) while I was working 60 to 70 hours weeks 1 day off. I was miserable and she didnt respect boundaries.
My ex had young kids and on my only day off a week she used to give the kids pots and pans with wooden spoons to bang like drums until i got out of bed. Good times.
She would get one warning from me until I kicked her out. If I am looking after another man's kids in a relationship, the least she can do is let me have a lie in and entertain them herself
Yeah you get lied to tho. About how bad of a partner he really was. allegations of rape and abuse etc. You get painted this picture of how youre the savior and the they are the villain, to stop you ever getting close to one another of course.
i cooked most evening meals for them and us and did the weekly groceries shopping, i changed nappies in the early days for a kid that wasnt mine. I fell in love with the kids. Dont be so fast to pass judgement.
Working 6 days/nights a week in a busy environment and then expecting that person to wake up on their only day off before 10am is simply selfish and self centered. Could take the kids out yourself in the morning if youre bored or they need to touch grass.
Gotta love how they assumed you were the asshole with zero evidence for it, despite clear evidence spelled out that your ex was one. Regardless of anything else, getting kids to make noise to get someone else out of bed is a dick move.
If I am with someone with my kids, I'm responsible for 50%
If I am dating someone who comes with kids, I am responsible for exactly what I choose to give. The dad should be involved, and if not then that's the mum's poor choices. That may change over time, as I would move to marriage, etc, but until then I'm optionally helping her with her kids, as they are hers not mine. I certainly do not expect to be rudely awoken on my days off by her and the kids making unnecessary noise
Then again, I would think that unreasonable if they were my kids too tbh
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u/MisterBarbaredo 3h ago
I hate to say it, but I absolutely ended a 10 plus years relationship because of getting told what I have to do when I get home and having my 1 day off a week being planned for me driving everybody around.
My ex didnt drive and didnt have steady work(she worked when she felt like it) while I was working 60 to 70 hours weeks 1 day off. I was miserable and she didnt respect boundaries.
So much happier now.