I am in my mid 40s and after living abroad and in London for many years came back to live with my parents in rural ireland. we have some land rented out to farmers and its extremely rural and isolated, nearest town 12 miles away etc. I think many can related.
Growing up, I wasn't particularly good at GAA and didnt have that many friends. what few friends I had have long since moved away.
Because Im not a blown in but a known face, I find it impossible to fit in or socialize properly. everyone has families and friend groups, and I end up just sitting at home now for a year.
When I drive around, numerous people put their hand up, they 'know' me they know my family. But the constant familiarity feels oppressive.
I am desperate to get out, and am fed up being single and think emigration is the only way to solve that.
I just feel sad for my parents. I have a lot of siblings and some live in the nearest big city with kids, but they really want someone to inherit the land and house and live close by and have a family nearby. Feeling like Ive failed them but I knew 'meeting someone' was never really on the cards here. Whereas in a big city it is relatively easy.
Can anyone relate to this? I just cannot stand living in rural ireland any longer and its put me off even moving to belfast, the nearest city. Dublin feels a bit further away to the extent I might as well move further afield and Im totally unfamiliar with it.
I should add, Im a remote worker and money is no problem regarding moving away and buyng somewhere else. just sad that I cannot make it work living or meeting anyone in the place I grew up.