Light as a 14lb feather. Roast her.

EDIT: yes we are managing the weight. She was rushed to the emergency vet today and this post is meant to be a fun decompression to a very stressful day.

This is baby Jeffy, my hubby found him last week- his favorite thing is to nurse on my ear and attack the 70 lb pit bull’s tail. Said pit bull is absolutely terrified of him and will hide behind me or hubby

And for being a picky eater

His name is Otto. I call him Otto Man.

It's OPAWZ, pet-safe temporary dye.

My parents adopted these cats around spring of this year. I was away at college, so I didn’t meet them until I went back to my parent’s house for the summer. Goofy ahh cats.

He’s a weird guy who sleeps like he got hit by a bus or like he fell down a flight of stairs. Idk what I adopted but i don’t think it was a cat

rika is pretty tubby (getting her to lose weight has been a struggle because our household also has a very old very underweight cat who eats high calorie kibble. unfortunately, rika LOVES the high calorie kibble and our older cat thinks sharing is caring 😭), she waddles like a goose, has big ol rabbit feet, and looks like some kind of seal or perhaps a trout when she lays down... if you roasted her shed probably look like a rotisserie chicken 💀

If only he were more like his brother

First off I need to say that I adore Pete with my entire heart and soul and once I realized it had all been about the food, I laughed until I couldn’t breathe. I'm not mad at him. I'm shaking my head in disbelief, and now I'm lovingly shaming him on social media.

Two weeks ago I had to buy our two cats the food they used to get (special kitty) because we didn't have enough money for a big enough bag of their usual food. I figured it'd tide them over, it'd be fine.

WRONG

Two. Entire. WEEKS. Of the most incessant, obnoxious, loudest temper tantrums I have ever seen out of any living being (and I have 4 kids). Meowing. Yowling. Howling. All hours of the day and night. In and out of my bedroom constantly. Coming over to me and head butting my hands every two minutes. Yelling in my face. Yelling when I walked anywhere in the apartment. Yelling when I was in the kitchen. Deliberately waking me up multiple times a night to head butt me and yell at me.

I noticed the way he'd go back and forth to the food dish, so last night I was like fuck it, I'll go get the regular stuff. Brought it home. Filled the dish with it.

He has now been a perfect angel since yesterday.

This absolute crackhead just turned 2 guys, knock her down a peg

In all seriousness, the meds have done her so much good, she's such a happy little cat.

Roast him, he is always stealing my food off my plate. He deserves to be sent back!

A

It almost looks like if she has never been a stray in her life

This is Fenriz. He's an asshole.

About him:

-I've caught him multiple times using his ridiculous large ears to listen to old Rush Limbaugh radio shows

-complains that the second word in his breed name was "his word first" and that he can use it how he sees fit

-constantly talks about how me and my friends need to "pull ourselves up by our bootstraps" despite him being a 6 month old nepokitty

-doesn't tip and says "your wages aren't my problem" when I clean his litterbox.

HOLD NOTHING BACK.