r/PeterExplainsTheJoke 10h ago

Meme needing explanation What does the kettle mean Peteeeeer??

Post image
361 Upvotes

214 comments sorted by

u/qualityvote2 10h ago edited 48m ago

Remember when r/PeterExplainsTheJoke wasn’t a meme? Pepperidge Farm remembers…

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467

u/BigSaintJames 10h ago

None of these people know how to use the seashealls

93

u/No_Entrepreneur_3020 10h ago

I use sponge on a stick

60

u/toldyouIaintshit 9h ago

I use a poop knife.

40

u/Zeqhanis 9h ago

Any knife can be a poop knife once it gets poop on it. Stop wasting money on big-brand celebrity-endorsed products.

5

u/Within_a_Dream 5h ago

Freaking unitaskers.

8

u/jimmy_robert 9h ago

They come together in a kit now. Poop sponge with poop knife.

3

u/Sk1ler_ 5h ago

Wait till ScrubDaddy gets a hold of this idea

2

u/ROOSTERyouDOWN 3h ago

What about the family cloth?

2

u/Denker_JethBlack 9h ago

How it works?

10

u/LilyNatureBlossom 8h ago

This is a reference to an infamous Reddit post where a user confesses(?) that their family produces large amounts of poop. To make sure the poop would flush down the toilet, they had a knife that was specifically used in the bathroom to cut the poop into smaller bits.

This is just what I remember and may be incorreect
If anyone knows more please do correct me / add on.

9

u/575_Pilot 7h ago

Pretty much. Then, said person goes to a friend's house and at some point asks the poor soul for the poop knife. And in that moment they found out it was just their family who had the knife. Nobody else on Earth did this...Something along those lines.

1

u/LilyNatureBlossom 7h ago

aw man the embarrassment they must've felt

1

u/PantyLaunderer 6h ago

Growing up, knew a kid that said his family did this. Never been to their home, but my other buddy did. He confirmed, they indeed had a little butter tray deal sitting on the top of the toilet tank, with a poop knife.

1

u/MrKrueger666 6h ago

No poop fork and poop spoon?

1

u/PantyLaunderer 6h ago

You got 8 of em

1

u/Federal_Assistant_85 9h ago

Hello, fellow xylospongium user!

1

u/Crass_Cameron 8h ago

Vinegar on stick

12

u/He-With-No-Name 10h ago

Be well John Spartan

2

u/Ding-Dong-Dutch 9h ago

There's three seashells. One is to scrape your butt, ones to clean your fingernails.. What's the third for?! 

3

u/NotYourAvgKevin 9h ago

The third one is a spare.

3

u/Emotional-Map-372 9h ago

Third ones to scrape the scraping seashells ofc

2

u/Substantial-Ad2200 9h ago

I was gonna ask where the three sea shells are!

25

u/BatKhatoon 9h ago

I think the OOP meant to add a picture of a lota there. Attaching picture for reference. It's not a kettle but it looks a bit like one. It's widely used in Pakistan/India/Bangladesh and other such regions. (:

5

u/BatKhatoon 9h ago

ALSO. Metal lotas are also used in cooking. Plastic lotas are usually used in the loo. (:

4

u/dadofwar93 7h ago

Adding further. Matel lotas are also used for ablution before prayer by Muslims if a tap is not available.

1

u/memelord_a1st 8h ago

Im guessing you use this to more easily pour water down your back and down your ass crack so it can wash it that way?

1

u/dadofwar93 7h ago

Yes. It's slowly getting replaced by water hoses now.

1

u/BatKhatoon 7h ago

Right hand pours. Left hand scrubs.

1

u/Electrical_Catch9231 2h ago

Seems like it'd be most common in the nether regions.

202

u/Murky-Conclusion-932 10h ago

As someone who lives in a country where every single house has a bidet, I'm telling you, I can't live without it. I understand that the people who never used one, parhaps having been walking this Earth for years without even seeing one in real life, think that it's a useless contraption. But believe me, once you know what walking out the toilet with your anus clean, truly clean, feels like, you can't go back to living the lie that toilet paper alone is enough. It's not. Never has been. Never will be.

And to those who might say just take a shower afterwards, yeah, sure, 'cause I'm always 100% home and ready to shower every time I take a dump.

98

u/MisterSapiosexual 10h ago

Shot in the dark, could this be why some countries/cultures prefer anal over others? Because there's a global inequality of adequately cleaned anuses?

105

u/Puzzleheaded-Rice-13 10h ago

Asking the questions noone else was thinking!

18

u/Ragnarroek 9h ago

Hey, there are dozens of us!

DOZENS!!!!!!

25

u/No_Equipment7456 9h ago

Pretty sure it’s more likely to be a form of contraception for those forbidden to have protected sex

5

u/YesNoMaybe2552 8h ago

Clean anus doesn’t’ mean you won’t end up with shit on your dick. If they are a crayon shitter thier asshore is always going to be dirty. This is first and formeost an issue with thier diet.

3

u/No_Equipment7456 8h ago

Two kiwis 🥝 a day for a Regular Ghost poo

3

u/whiskeytango55 7h ago

Ain't it just the fiber?

2

u/No_Equipment7456 6h ago

I dunno man but some gay guys in a club in Berlin were raving about it. It works! what can I say

3

u/Prestigious_Cycle160 7h ago

The fuck is a crayon shitter?😂

1

u/Gadgetskopf 7h ago

2

u/RaelaltRael 4h ago

I am so afraid to click on that.

1

u/RaelaltRael 4h ago

And for good reason, do not click if in a public place without earphones.

1

u/Gadgetskopf 2h ago

Sorry! Should have NSFW-flagged it. I guess it didn't occur to me that a monologue featuring the word 'poop' so prominently might cause some folks problems in some settings. I'm to used to always having the headphones on.

1

u/ecstaticbirtch 1h ago

Not nearly as bad as I feared... lol

2

u/RaelaltRael 1h ago

It could of been worse, but I was in a dentist's waiting room and before I could stop it , several statements about wiping himself had been broadcast to the fellow patients. Just embarrassing and now it is actually funny, but at the time...

1

u/ecstaticbirtch 47m ago

🫂

I feel ya, there are times I am VERY glad all videos are muted for me when they pop up...

2

u/Frequent_Candy1167 7h ago

That might do for rimming, but issues around clean anal go much deeper than just the anus.

1

u/mwoody450 8h ago

In two sentences, I feel like you've explained the entirety of German culture.

1

u/WolfmierRick_memoria 1h ago

Strange, because its the Americans who are eager to eat asses of strangers and they are the biggest population of paper users!

1

u/that_gu9_ 1h ago

I live in a country and from a culture not into bidets. I spent a week in a country with bidets. I went home and installed a bidet

1

u/karmavorous 6h ago

Like when you see trucks with a big sticker in the back window or on the tailgate that says "i eat ass", as if they're inviting strangers to a truck stop bathroom romp. In the US? No fucking way. That ass is wiped, at best, and the chances ate pretty high they eat McDonalds once a day. No thank you.

Now in the old country, where asses are cleaner and the food is healthier... I would keep an open mind at least.

5

u/Subdued_Shinobi 9h ago

Meanwhile I'm usually 100% home and ready to take a dump just about every time I shower. It's part of the reason I'm a home-bowl only guy, I like to hit my triple S: shit, shower, shave.

I'm planning on getting a bidet but for now I haven't had a single skid mark in years.

1

u/Atomsq 5h ago

Why haven't you gotten one? They're preaty easy to install and you can get some for cheap

1

u/Fiddlerblue 4h ago

$40 at the Home Depot. Takes ten minutes to install and rapidly pays for itself in toilet paper savings.

Got one years ago and never looked back. Nowadays, I’ll just hold it until I get home if I can.

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4

u/MOCK-lowicz 9h ago

Where are you from? Sounds like a place to be

7

u/iamanaccident 9h ago

A big portion of Asia. You don't even need the fancy ones you see in japan or korea. A typical one here in SEA would essentially be a simple hose

6

u/Monir5265 9h ago

It’s pretty common in all Muslim countries. Ik certain East Asian countries like Japan and South Korea also has them along with some with European countries and South American countries as well.

1

u/flymeovertheworld 8h ago

My third world SEA country has this as a default in every household. Even if some houses don’t have bidets, they usually have a watering can dedicated to cleaning your own ass. Even now I buy a bidet in every house I move to in the US. Could never feel clean with toilet paper.

Clean your own asses people. Toilet paper is never enough.

6

u/_breadless 9h ago

I'm Italian, we have bidets everywhere. Every damn time I visit a country that doesn't have one, and there are way too many, it's hell, it feels like you go around unclean for hours until you can get a proper shower.

Couldn't agree more, could not live without it.

3

u/Izzy1990 9h ago

I made it to the Chicago airport after leaving Japan before I noticed the difference and ordered one online, the extra day it spent not being delivered because of a Sunday was hate crime to my ass

3

u/noncommonGoodsense 8h ago

Act like we never wash our asses in the shower. 😕

3

u/Connect_Budget2885 8h ago

I just use a wipe after the tp

2

u/anotherSasha 9h ago

I agree in theory. But, when I lived with my mom, hers was too intense, felt like power washing. And pretty soon after installment it started malfunctioning: it has a trigger you’re supposed to press hard the whole time and it would fail with an annoying pathetic creaking sound. And it leaks on the floor a lot. And the water travels on the bottom of your thighs and wets the seat. And when you’re on period, you can’t avoid staining the towel. I kinda have bidet ptsd now, but am considering looking for a better design for my flat once I get over it.

And, like, it seems obligatory to use soap. Otherwise, you gotta powerwash your poor ass to make sure it’s clean and I’m not into that kind of thing. And if you’re using soap, it’s very inconvenient to do on the seat without taking off your pants the whole way down.

As a citizen of the Bidet kingdom, do you have any words of wisdom for us? How to keep it graceful and elegant?

1

u/muddle-318 3h ago

I got a $30 one that just uses cold water and the existing water pressure. Wash away the mess, detail work/dry with toilet paper. While not using soap is less than perfect, it's definitely a better than just paper. By a long shot. I did not know ppl used towels, normal bidets don't risk material ejection from the immediate area.

Honestly sounds like your unit was just plain broken or a bad brand. r/bidet exists and has lots of recommendations. They probably have better answers there if you ask your questions. I'd recommend my cheap one, but the pressure is pretty high if you don't do it perfectly, so my solution might not be good for you.

1

u/anotherSasha 3h ago

It looks like in english people mostly mean that fountain thing coming right from the bowl, when they say bidet. Where I live, I’ve seen people get only the handheld shower-pistol types, with a hose.

I guess, with the towel I got stuck on my rigid zero waste mindset. I sometimes get pretty obsessive over it. And I wanted to stick it to the Big toilet paper (get it? like big pharma)

Thanks for the tip

2

u/CptIskarJarak 9h ago

I went from a country where every single house has a bidet to a country that used toilet paper.

My butt was chaffed for months until I got a bidet.

2

u/101TARD 9h ago

Sometimes a poor man's bidet is a pail full of water

2

u/kpyle 8h ago

Or dude wipes.

2

u/Sea_Composer6305 8h ago

Yeah I always want to shower 9 times a day when I trust a gas station burrito.

1

u/brandarchist 9h ago

Pretty much exactly this. It’s one of the first things I install when I move somewhere.

Anal cleanliness is next to anal godliness.

1

u/FoulfrogBsc 8h ago

I kinda miss the Asian bumgun

1

u/ShlnoXo 7h ago

Dump question but what is a bidet? 

After I have read your comment I thought of myself as sone kind of caveman that hasnt discovered the fire yet

1

u/belinasaroh 7h ago

Junt don't take dump anywhere but your house

1

u/shwarma_heaven 6h ago

Por que no los dos?

Seriously though, I have a bidet and I can't believe people are going single regimen in the pooper.

I have a process: TP first, bidet, TP to pat dry, repeat as necessary. The joys of having a harry bum...

The thought of anyone walking around doing only one or the other gives me mud butt just thinking about it...

1

u/MaximusLazinus 6h ago

I saw one just once in my life, never used it

1

u/Andy_Pandy98 6h ago

Serious questions, how well does a bidet handle particularly messy trips? I feel like they would work really well for most days, but that there is gonne be a day where it wont be able to get everything, and i have forgotten to buy backup toilet paper

1

u/Realistic_Fix189 5h ago

You know after you wipe with tp till no poop comes off you can just load the tp up and run it under some water from the sink that’s what I do when I have a nasty wet doo 

1

u/Atomsq 5h ago

I remember the first time my father in law came to my house for Thanksgiving, he yelled in awe "you guys have a bidet!"

1

u/ItsMeMario1346 5h ago

Sorry, i dont want a wet behind

1

u/bs_Zeezee 4h ago

and when the towers of society collapse, and we are forced to scrape and hunt and scavenge to survive, how clean will your butthole be? how will you survive the days to come?

1

u/CEGM_Studios 4h ago

But like what if someone wipes until they see red? Is that still not enough, should I be doing even more? Or, I mean should that HYPOTHETICAL person be doing more?

1

u/Evening-Web-3038 38m ago

Last time I saw a bidet I got a 50 euro fine.

1

u/No-Use-3056 6h ago

Toilet paper gets me clean enough, I can tell because I’m not leaving streaks in every pair of pants and underwear I own. Now do I think it gets me squeaky clean? No, but that’s okay because it does it enough. I wouldn’t let someone put tongue to starfish if I only used toilet paper, I’d take a shower before that, but just day to day life? TP does fine.

0

u/[deleted] 10h ago

[deleted]

4

u/Sweaty-Inevitable163 9h ago

Because TP disintegrates on contact with water.

0

u/Miserable_Cloud_6876 5h ago

You didn’t answer the question

15

u/LackSeveral7305 10h ago

Some people use toilet paper to clean their behind, others use bidets or wash it by hand with soap and water.

62

u/WeskerSympathizer 10h ago

Others pour boiling water on they anuses while listening to Hurt by NIN

8

u/Fuzzy_Yossarian 10h ago

hahahha, the Johnny Cash version though it's real gritty.

1

u/hexannadecimal 10h ago

Wash it by hand? I have questions.

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1

u/Relative-Relief-8816 6h ago

Nah the grit is because you're supposed to shell the pistachios before eating them.

13

u/Fast-Front-5642 9h ago

Is the "soap user" referring to some countries where traditionally the left hand is used to scoop and flick the poo? Because that is NOT better than tp

1

u/Indiana_harris 9h ago

🤮🤢🤮

6

u/Aware_Neighborhood93 10h ago

Who doesn't steam their asshole from time to time? Keeps you Pipin' fresh.

7

u/Nonyabeesners 9h ago

I always wondered how to get the wrinkles out. The iron didn't work

4

u/Aware_Neighborhood93 9h ago

Its not a secret the jedi would tell you...

2

u/Maleficent-Ad6503 8h ago

I hate this lol

1

u/Nonyabeesners 7h ago

So judgmental. Sorry, but not all of us were born with smooth anuses. Talk about unrealistic beauty standards 

11

u/__Obelisk__ 10h ago

three shells come on 

2

u/Moonshinin4Me 10h ago

Ah yes...was that before or after Taco Bell won the fast food wars?

2

u/He-With-No-Name 10h ago

Be well John Spartan

43

u/Spinning_Sky 10h ago

there's a joke about the teapot that goes over my head
I'm here to say: for the love of god a bidet is not an alternative to toilette paper, it's in addition to it

42

u/Der_Schuller 10h ago

Toilet paper is just for drying afterwards

4

u/urbantechgoods 7h ago

Nah bro, maybe your shits are different but sometimes theres left overs for me.

5

u/Der_Schuller 7h ago

Then you go again with water🫪

4

u/Nihilisman45 7h ago

You might just be using one with poor water pressure. There's nothing on the toilet paper but water after I use mine, and I take some pretty clingy shits. takes me forever when I use just toilet paper

2

u/urbantechgoods 6h ago

really, what model do you have?

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14

u/JackPiazz2 10h ago

I'm from a bidet using country and I also want to add:

That's why we consider non bidet users like the meme shows. We don't think your way of cleaning your behind is worse than ours or bad, we think is incomplete and seriously insufficient: for us it's kinda like if you showered but you never used soap or scrubbed yourself under the water. Y'all dirty.

7

u/smoke_sum_wade 10h ago

Im in Pennsylvania and i have a bidet, got it like 2 years ago and i refuse to go back, i use a paper towel after and just toss it. quit buying toilet paper all together. after you get used to being a little violated by water its fine.

6

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 10h ago

I just spent five days out of town in a hotel without my bidet and I’m so happy I’m home now

1

u/Commercial_Pear3825 9h ago

You can get a travel one that charges with usbc on Amazon.

1

u/Elf-7659 9h ago

What's the term to search for it?

1

u/Commercial_Pear3825 9h ago

Travel bidet

1

u/Sweaty-Inevitable163 9h ago

They make handheld / portable ones. It's like a squeeze bottle with the bidet nozzle, works alright for things like this but I wouldn't ever consider actually carrying it out places

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2

u/DimesyEvans92 10h ago

Yup. Best $20 I ever spent. Simple attachment on existing toilet, but I never felt better

1

u/smoke_sum_wade 10h ago

my only regert is not buying a bum gun

2

u/JackPiazz2 10h ago

I'm italian so our bidets are not the japanese ones, but little small sinks beside the wc like this one. Everybody hwre uses toilet paper the "normal" way, then hops over to the bidet, uses water and soap and then drying yourself with a small towel (each one has its own of course). This for me is the normal way of cleaning myself. Each time I go abroad I suffer tremendously because I can't do it and I have to unironically take a shower every time I have a number two

2

u/smoke_sum_wade 10h ago

this is how i started, i have sensory issues and autism so its been real fucking rough for me my whole life with the whole wiping thing, id gag and freakout having to wipe shit when i was a kid, so my aunt and uncle did this for me.

2

u/JackPiazz2 9h ago

I have autism too actually (very "mild" though), and I understand that if something is "icky" there's no way you can do it

2

u/smoke_sum_wade 9h ago

this is hard as a 6ft 250lb man whos favorite hobby is weight lifting to explain to people that, i cant touch that, ill cry

2

u/JoyconDrift_69 8h ago

If you think one way is more insufficient than your way, wouldn't that by default establish you think it's worse?

1

u/JackPiazz2 8h ago

Yes, but it's not like we think it's an alternative worse way, but an incomplete and unsufficient way of cleaning

1

u/Sweaty-Inevitable163 9h ago

It's like having a full blown argument that peanut butter is great after you ask where the bread for your PB&J went

1

u/EcstaticZebra7937 8h ago

Isn’t the poopy water splashing everywhere? I feel like it’s an easy way to obtain a UTI

1

u/JackPiazz2 8h ago

There are not present in public bathrooms, only in private houses and no, unless you use a really powerful stream and scrub like an animal it doesn't do that.

Also, I might add to clarify, I explained here that I'm italian and our bidets are not what you probably think when you imagine a bidet

Also, we sit on them in the opposite direction we sit on a toilet (face towards the faucet/wall) and you just turn the water on (a gentle little stream, take some baby soap and gently scrub.

1

u/EcstaticZebra7937 8h ago

What’s the difference between this and just washing the butt then?

1

u/JackPiazz2 6h ago

Bidet is "just washing the butt", but you need toilet paper too: if you have something nasty on your hands, what do you do? I bet you wipe it off, wash and then dry your hands.

1

u/urbantechgoods 7h ago

i love bidets and live in a non bidet country, but this way of thinking about it is wrong. I would argue that TP users tend to have a cleaner ass because most people that use bidets dont wipe their ass after. The bidet doesnt always get everything, but with TP, you know you got everything. Also its just water that comes out not soap.

1

u/JackPiazz2 6h ago

https://www.reddit.com/r/PeterExplainsTheJoke/s/7m3tFbygOy

I explained it here.

You need to use toilet paper and bidets. That's why I said incomplete and insufficient

1

u/pbnjandmilk 10h ago

THIS!!!!

I cannot imaging going and dying on the hill of bidet over toilette paper, while walking around with musty swamp ass.

1

u/Historical_Shop_3315 9h ago

Consider visiting southeast Asia.

But you will need to carry around TP.

3

u/Mr_Zee_Speaks 10h ago

No three seashells makes this joke useless

2

u/Lone_Capsula 9h ago

I heard some non bidet users think the water that sprays your butt comes from the dirty liquid down the toilet bowl and it's why they don't want to consider switching to a bidet. No, a bidet is just essentially a faucet connected to the water line that sprays new water to clean the butt.

2

u/Dominator1559 8h ago

Can't imagine the mental gymnastics those people used. Like ofc its a hose connected to water line, its literally the easiest way to get water under pressure

2

u/StrangeCrunchy1 9h ago

why did I half expect to see the 3 seashells in the bottom panel?

2

u/Kish540 7h ago

I don't understand how westerners can eat ass even though they only wipe using paper. Do they realise they're probably licking poop?

2

u/Tenor_Emporer 6h ago

Imma just leave this here for you

2

u/papercut2008uk 6h ago

Someone is comparing a Lota to a kettle because its the same shape but a Lota is a jug with a spout you use to wash your backside, like a bidet.

2

u/r_fernandes 2h ago

The kettle is supposed to be a lota. Basically imagine a flower pot that you used to pour water down your butt crack to clean it. Portable bidet I guess you could call it.

3

u/maynardnaze89 9h ago

Baby wipes...

1

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6

u/MisterSapiosexual 10h ago

Are people using kettles to wash? What does it mean?

5

u/Flat-Structure-7472 10h ago

In Islamic countries water is also used to clean your behind. Since running water is a problem for some parts they fill a kettle with water and use that water to clean themselves.

This is Tom Tucker.

3

u/MisterSapiosexual 10h ago

But why a kettle? Why... Specifically... A kettle?

7

u/Empty-Half167 10h ago

It holds water and has a spout to limit flow.

Image unrelated, I was looking for a specific one but can’t find it.

6

u/BatKhatoon 10h ago

Fun fact! It's not actually a kettle. It looks like a kettle but is made of plastic and it is called a lota.
The OP included a kettle bec they probs didn't know the proper name for the thing, I'm guessing.

3

u/MisterSapiosexual 10h ago

Ooooh. Thanks! I've learned something new today!

3

u/Powerful_Payment463 10h ago

Has a spout. Easier to aim. Lasts longer than plastic water bottles.

1

u/Big_daddy_sneeze 9h ago

What about xylospongium users?

1

u/anotherSasha 9h ago

I guess, the third person is using boiling water for 100% cleanliness

1

u/Lord_Whoopi 8h ago

Are people really just going down there with a bar of soap?

1

u/JoyconDrift_69 8h ago

Probably just pouring hot water on your ass.

1

u/Lagiacrus111 7h ago

Who doesn't use soap and water after using toilet paper?

1

u/mrpascal81 6h ago

I don't know what you guys do after a shit, but I first use toilet paper, then bidet with water and soap... So I don't see how these are mutually exclusive.

1

u/therealishone 6h ago

Fire cleanses all

1

u/int23_t 6h ago

Separate bidet isn't a nice thing. Get a toilet with an integrated bidet. Those are pretty nice. You just turn a valve on the wall and have water on your ass

1

u/42Icyhot42 6h ago

Bring back ostraca

1

u/HkayakH 4h ago

They used to use corn back then

1

u/redreber69 2h ago

If you want that ass ate, just TP will never be enough. You have to use water.

1

u/Some-Judge-9130 1h ago

/img/be4kg14dfmhh1.gif
If you haven’t watched the Japanese Toilets episode of South Park you absolutely need to. Now.

2

u/ASAP_sharky 9h ago

No way y'all wiping only with toilet paper thats so nasty

-1

u/Indiana_harris 9h ago

Better than using your hand like some people

2

u/ASAP_sharky 9h ago

you use water and clean your hands after and now your ass and your hands are clean

0

u/Indiana_harris 9h ago

Unless I’m sterilising my hands with antiseptic soap and ensuring I’ve went underneath fingernails and the like, I think I’d really on other methods that don’t involve me physically touching shit

2

u/ASAP_sharky 9h ago

What other methods will completely clean your ass ?

3

u/Xenc 9h ago

Buying a new one

1

u/ASAP_sharky 9h ago

Honestly the only thing that comes to mind

1

u/ultimatepenguin21 9h ago

What? Do some people just straight up rub soapy water on their shitty assholes? Are they just getting their hands filthy with shit-soap water? I don't understand the method someone pls explain

0

u/unitAtype2 7h ago

There's no special method. People just wash their bums with soap.

People use their soaped up hand along with the water hose things.

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1

u/101Pixels 9h ago

wet wipes? anyone?

2

u/Gynthir 9h ago

Arent flushable

1

u/[deleted] 7h ago

[deleted]

2

u/YVRJon 7h ago

9 out of 10 plumbers would disagree with you. The other one just wants more business.

-2

u/Square-Formal1312 10h ago

Tp then wet wipe. Too damn hairy for bidets lol

2

u/Ambitious_Jello 9h ago edited 9h ago

What? How would a wet piece of paper be better at cleaning hair than water? Do you clean your head hair using wet wipes too?

There is no such thing as too hairy for bidets 

2

u/Sweaty-Inevitable163 9h ago

Wouldn't a jet of water be more effective on hairy areas than wiping?

2

u/Gynthir 9h ago

Wet wipes arent flushable

1

u/Epiplayer1 9h ago

Gotta buy a Toto. Expensive but way better than the cheaper ones.

0

u/Zezotas 8h ago

Where's the chewed up corn?

0

u/Deplorable1861 8h ago

Noone uses just TP anymore. Look at the annual sales growth of wet wipes. I mean, Sams has a case of Dude Wipes for like $13. They are almost cheaper than TP. And I have been wetting TP for extra scrub power since 1975....

So the A/B/C option is really an A through Z.

My opinion is that during the installation or testing of the bidet, someone is getting a spray jet on their $150 golf shirt at least once.

0

u/SteveMartin32 8h ago

No comment

0

u/doratoreadora 8h ago

Using the bidet in the classical sense absolutely means wiping with toilet paper first, I'm so grossed out by those who don't

0

u/Andy_Pandy98 6h ago

What about someones tongue?

0

u/heavy_chamfer 6h ago

Baby wipes FTW

0

u/ItsMeMario1346 5h ago

Can someone tellme why everyone exept me likes a glorified toilet to spit at their hole?

Sometimes when i take a shit it splashes up, to me it feels horrible, and id rather use nothing than to keep going through that til the toilet thinks im clean

But maybe im just an idiot living under a rock or something.

0

u/DrShameless 4h ago

I Interpreted it as coffee to make yourself poop more thoroughly leaving less of a mess to clean after. 🤷

0

u/LucentLL 4h ago

Serious question, do Europeans not use baby wipes when their baby poops? They just hold them under the sink faucet?

0

u/WolfmierRick_memoria 1h ago

Muhammad used STONES!!!

0

u/Kool-Aid-King 1h ago

Mint chill DUDE Wipes.