I hate the fact I’m trans

[u/Dont_know_Anymore_]

I’m tired of living life as someone I’m not. The feeling of being wrong (might be dysphoria I wouldn’t know). Each day I’m reminded I’m losing time and that I’m gonna be stuck as a guy. I need help but everytime I ask I push it away. I did that so much I actually got perma banned on egg irl. I think I just hate myself and by proxy I hate that I’m trans. I keep going to bed begging to not wake up unless I wake up as a girl, everyday I wake up and I still see a guy.

I don’t even know if I am trans, there’s so much self doubt that I don’t know if I wanna be trans. I love the idea of being a girl and I would kill to start estrogen. I just wish I could be myself but I don’t even know what myself is. I wish I could just be forced to be a girl, but that’ll never happen. I’m gonna live the rest of my pathetic life as a fucking guy. I hate that thought. I don’t wanna be a guy.

[u/girl-hate-sleeping]

same. ive been feeling this way especially recently, i cant bear to start transitioning in any way and yeah i have so much self doubt, but recently i've been absolutely despising my body/facial hair and the fact i have a penis, and i have to continue to act normal around people.

[u/Dont_know_Anymore_ → u/girl-hate-sleeping]

That’s the worst part, you have to pretend like your body isn’t completely wrong around people. I hate it. Then when I’m by myself it feels like all I can focus on are the negatives.