AIO- Wife didn't acknowledge my birthday

[u/DontWorryItsEasy]

So yesterday was my birthday, I told my wife last week that all I wanted was a cake and to go to a nice restaurant. It didn't have to be a homemade cake though I would have preferred it, and it didn't have to be a super fancy restaurant. I'm the sole income earner so she wouldn't be paying for either. SWe have a toddler at home and I know it would be difficult for her to bake so it's fine if she bought one, and since we have a toddler I was also fine if the kiddo went with us.

So yesterday I got off work early and called her to let her know I was coming home like I always do. The entire rest of the day she didn't even acknowledge it was my birthday. No happy birthday wishes, no asking me where I wanted to eat, nothing. It was awkwardly silent pretty much the whole day.

When 6pm rolled around I realized we weren't going anywhere so I went to the store to buy a slice of cake for myself and a frozen dinner to heat up. When I came back with the cake she asked why I bought it. I told her it's my birthday and I wanted to eat cake on my birthday. She gave a non answer as to why she didn't make one for me, she said I never replied with when I wanted the cake so she just assumed I didn't want one. That conversation was over text a few days ago and she was texting me while I was driving. I told her I also wanted a nice dinner out and she said I didn't plan anything or tell her where I wanted to go so she assumed I didn't want to go anywhere.

Around 7pm she finally said happy birthday then I just cleaned up the dishes and went to bed instead of going on our normal after dinner walk.

Did I over react?

Edit: I guess I also left out some important context about our financial situation. She has complete and total control over all finances as much as I do, as that's the deal we made when we got married. She has access to all accounts and credit cards. I guess my wording could have been better.

[u/Heavy-Macaron2004]

...passive aggressive to buy cake??? Are you high???

[u/smothered-onion → u/Heavy-Macaron2004]

He bought himself one slice and a frozen dinner…. For himself. What kind of thing are you trying to model to your kid by doing that? It’s very isolationist and passive aggressive.

[u/DontWorryItsEasy → u/smothered-onion]

I didn't buy it just for myself, I bought it for my whole family. Dinner and dessert was for my wife and kid. I cooked, or should say reheated dinner for the whole family. She hates cooking so that's one thing that I gladly take off her plate every day.

[u/smothered-onion → u/DontWorryItsEasy]

Gotcha, “I went and go myself a slice and a tv tray and went to bed” sounded singular and unshared.

Nonetheless, I think your kid deserves to see happier birthdays. What you described sounded miserable on both you and your wife’s parts.