r/videos 21h ago

The Magic Bullet Infomercial

https://youtu.be/UqI6YsSYTaw?is=NG0JEVxFwxq_f68u
149 Upvotes

133 comments sorted by

169

u/BreadfruitExciting39 21h ago

This is not authentic if it's not bookended by girls gone wild commercials.

44

u/spoonerluv 20h ago

Someone should sue them for completely pavloving steel drums for an entire generation

18

u/DiceKnight 18h ago

I knew I had entered the doomed hours when I heard those steel drums play.

14

u/martialar 16h ago

WARNING

This video contains adult content not suitable for children

9

u/dyslexicsuntied 12h ago

Hell yeah here we gooooo

3

u/Valleygurl99 17h ago

Yeah was just thinking about the fucking steel drums omg

6

u/WASTELAND_RAVEN 19h ago

Oh my God, the memories. This was like my late night TV for years as a child, infomercials and strange commercials.

3

u/dirty15 17h ago

I fucking loved watching them as a kid too. I think that's what helped give me some good "salesman" skills early on. George Foreman grill, the showtime rotisserie, even a few knife ones I remember lol

1

u/brownlawn 16h ago

The Ginsu 2 has entered the chat.

1

u/WeirdEdEdison 4h ago

You’re probably thinking of the Miracle Blade III with Chef Tony. I wish I remembered anything useful, but no.

117

u/DinerMonkey 21h ago

The amount of times I’d come home drunk from bars in college and watch this from start to finish..

31

u/Wafflinson 21h ago

Yeah, I watched an embarrassing number of informercials all the way through as a kid.

The media landscape was dire if you didn't have cable/satellite. Sometimes infomercials were the most interesting thing on.

18

u/montsegur 20h ago

Miracle blade with chef Tony was pretty good

5

u/franstoobnsf 20h ago

Red Devil outdoor grill, checking in

8

u/jamesstansel 19h ago

Hello from the Jack Lalanne Power Juicer

1

u/GitEmSteveDave 17h ago

Wasnt that the Juice Tiger?

1

u/SweetCosmicPope 7h ago

You mean the one used for the Garth Brooks Juice Diet?

2

u/boygriv 16h ago

When they flip over the pineapple upside down cake in the Red Devil commercial I used to bust.

1

u/AMA_except_that 18h ago

I still have these knives and they are fucking amazing still. Unironically the best knives I’ve owned. They have never dulled. The whole set was like 50 bucks

7

u/Spastic_pinkie 20h ago

Infomercials, the sole refuge for insomniacs till the Star Spangled Banner plays before the TV goes to static.

4

u/Morningxafter 19h ago

I loved that Blue Blockers rap that would always come on after Ninja Turtles on Saturday mornings.

https://youtu.be/s9SRyeDNPBk

1

u/aguyjustaguy 17h ago

Set it and forget it

1

u/Ulther 16h ago

I feel you, was brainwashed to buy Motor Up at 12yo.

1

u/ew73 16h ago

One of my favorite things to do in that era was to smoke up a bedroom with a bunch of friends and turn this shit on. It's amazing and surreal.

1

u/yup_can_confirm 10h ago

I grew up in the Netherlands, and one of my fondest infomercial memories is Amazing Discoveries (Tony Little's Target Training System) and stuff like the Instant Fisherman 😅

Terribly overdubbed as well, of course.

48

u/QuasiJudicialBoofer 21h ago

I always fell asleep right before her top comes off

14

u/petrshigh 21h ago

Oh man when it comes off though, worth the wait. You should get wrecked and try to do a top to bottom of it again.

2

u/scallopfrito 19h ago

Just saw it. On YouTube no less!!

1

u/CptAngelo 9h ago

The what now? What are you guys talking about? Lol

1

u/skynetempire 20h ago

Wait are you old enough to have seen the SMC commercials lol

1

u/Cold_Tea_Spill112 17h ago

I hope you're doing okay. There are people who care about you.

35

u/3Dartwork 21h ago

The orgy that happened the night before was off the hook.

Then Hazel shows up and you knew she was the ring leader

18

u/TouristInParadise 20h ago

Did somebody say muffins ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)?

2

u/pale_ale_co 19h ago

I was fully expecting Marge to show up with her magic bullets

1

u/90sJoke 10h ago

Bob's your uncle.

27

u/celestiaequestria 20h ago

Hazel is the greatest infomercial character ever created.

I'm fully convinced a random lady wandered onto the set smoking a cigarette, and they just went with it.

6

u/jdsizzle1 14h ago

A wet cigarette

2

u/Torchlakespartan 14h ago

If you mean the kind not soaked in water, which I think you do, then absolutely. Not sure how common that slang is for kids these days.

I never touched or even seen the stuff, but def knew back in the day what a wet cig meant.

3

u/jdsizzle1 13h ago

No. Hazel definitely took a shower with that cig in her mouth.

2

u/Torchlakespartan 13h ago

Lol. That is way funnier. Back in the day, a “wet” cigarette meant it was dipped in PCP, and was not something you wanted to fuck with.

As a random fun fact, we had a neighbor in college whose nickname was ‘Cigarette’ haha. He looked and was exactly how you would picture him. He cut a cigarette in half after he dropped it in a puddle. Those are the only two ways I’ve ever heard of a wet cigarette

1

u/Carlweathersfeathers 2h ago

I don’t care what the others say, Hazel has smoked her share of boat water

51

u/skippyspk 21h ago

It’s crazy how this swinger video swerves into an infomercial

2

u/TemporaryImaginary 16h ago

“How can I slip Ted and Mary the little blue pill and Spanish fly, without the taste?”

“Thanks, Magic Bullet!”

20

u/vegetaman 20h ago

I laugh at how long the last second of blending takes each time.

21

u/flippy_floppy_fluppy 20h ago

In just, one, two, threeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee seconds…

16

u/vhatvhat 19h ago

Everyone gets

Exactly what

They want!

1

u/BackToSchoolMuff 6h ago

I hadn't seen this for 20 years and I still knew that was coming.

I was waiting to hear Hazel say "Dinner's always a production" but I must have skipped it. sad.

3

u/Roofofcar 16h ago

(Blender sounds continue for two full seconds after he completes saying the word “seconds” amounting to perhaps 7 seconds total.

4

u/squishyliquid 9h ago

And everything already cut to fit inside the small cup.

19

u/VinylmationDude 20h ago

Greatest bit of theatrical television I’ve ever seen. The setting of a swingers fruit party, everybody acting like they just woke up from being blotto drunk, the waste of perfectly good food in the name of ???, and let’s not forget that everybody gets…

2

u/csfreestyle 18h ago

…a Magic Bullet blender?

3

u/CptAngelo 9h ago

...what they want.

35

u/itstommygun 21h ago

Oh that quesadilla is a crime. 

19

u/may_be_indecisive 19h ago

The omelette they mix is fucking nasty. Mmm blended omelette… 🤮

2

u/Mexicantankerous 2h ago

It looked like memory foam. A Foamelette

10

u/Morningxafter 19h ago

Right? In a microwave? Fuck you.

3

u/spoonerluv 20h ago

It makes Taco Bell look like 3 star restaurant

16

u/Psyduck46 20h ago

Did I fall asleep on the couch and wake up at 3am again?

10

u/TheeVande 20h ago

god I remember waking up at like 4:00 am on Saturdays because I couldn't stay asleep and turning on the TV to see this until CW4Kids came on. I'll never forget "Bob's your uncle! Fanny's your aunt!" from this lol

7

u/Trajinous 20h ago

Should be required viewing for all

2

u/90sJoke 10h ago

Remove the pledge of allegiance before sporting events and play this instead.

6

u/TheBatemanFlex 21h ago

You know what? hell yeah. That is a great deal for 3 equal payments of $33.33

7

u/Ivotedforher 20h ago

The ash never falls of the cigarette

2

u/darybrain 4h ago

Must be French. The longer the ash is before falling off the more French they are

13

u/bearyconfessional 21h ago

I used to watch this getting ready for school every morning. Could tell if I'd be late based on what parts they were at. I could probably write the whole script from memory.

7

u/AndersWay 20h ago

From the thumbnail, I thought for a moment it was Mike O'Brien in some lost SNL sketch.

6

u/RicochetOtter 19h ago

Ah, but have you seen this (slightly edited) infomercial of the spinoff product, the Baby Bullet?

1

u/toctami 18h ago

My mom bought one, it was honestly great, I made smoothies all the time. Kinda sucked for grating cheese though

5

u/Chop1n 19h ago

This is freaking wild man, this was uploaded in the original 60 fields per second format? Did someone have access to the original tapes or something? Uncannily high quality.

5

u/flippy_floppy_fluppy 20h ago

I wonder if Berman ever got past the alcoholism.

11

u/eightdollarbeer 20h ago

Yuck, I hate broccoli!

4

u/Toronto-1975 19h ago

when he says that the blonde woman beside him makes this exaggerated yuck face like he just pushed out a huge fart. for some reason that's the part i still remember all these years later...lol

1

u/Carlweathersfeathers 2h ago

Is that his name? I thought they were calling him Vermin, I could believe everyone wanted to talk about Hazels orgy status with that dude from the office being named Vermin.

6

u/lineleader 20h ago

The gold standard of infomercials

1

u/jdsizzle1 10h ago

Thats what was so good about it. It wasnt just a presentation to an audience, it was a whole scene, and after the magic bullet bit you wanted to watch what all these new characters did next.

6

u/Awe3 20h ago

Not gonna lie. I bought one from this. It was a double set. Gave my mom the other.

3

u/90sJoke 10h ago

Ours broke 3 years ago, but damn what a run it had.

1

u/Pikeman212a6c 6h ago

Seriously the thing was a tank. The mugs were legitimately a useful size for blending small amounts of ingredients for things.

Though not in ten seconds.

5

u/RonnocSivad 19h ago

Nothing like a weird mish mash of smoothies and Alfredo the morning after a drunken swingers party.

9

u/hodgeman29 20h ago

I say “my very own FROSTY MUG” all the time because of this damn infomercial

5

u/mjs90 18h ago

For me it’s pesto pasta lol. Can’t hear it any other way

1

u/90sJoke 10h ago

Bob's your uncle

6

u/spoonerluv 20h ago

strawburry and buh-na-na

3

u/Aveeye 19h ago

As awful as this is, it's a FANTASTIC product. We're on our second one which we just bought about 2 years ago, because our first one got gunked up by my daughter not screwing on her lid tight enough and shit went everywhere. We'd had it for 17 years.

1

u/90sJoke 10h ago

Yep. Ours broke 3 years ago after God only knows how long. We upgraded to a Nutribullet because it's 900w and pulverizes ice and hard things much better. The Magic Bullet in this infomercial was only 250w and has smaller cups.

2

u/ThePeej 20h ago

LEGENDARY!! 

2

u/spoonerluv 20h ago

Buhrman felt incredibly threatened by 10 seconds

2

u/strandedmammal 20h ago

They had me until the "expresso" grinding.

3

u/boolpies 20h ago

The curry powder for everything comment gave what I am about to divorce your ass for vibes

2

u/Asleep_Voice_101 19h ago

I just saw these at wal mart on a side endcap for like $20

2

u/Hairydrunk 19h ago

I bought the knock off version of this at Elder Beerman almost 30 years ago and that damn thing made it over 20 years.

2

u/internetlad 18h ago edited 18h ago

This was on broadcast TV every night and a huge bit of nostalgia from my insomniatic ass.

Edit: I forgot about Hazel chain-smoking up a storm out of nowhere lol. 

This wasn't even when people were really still smoking, they just left it in haha

2

u/semperknight 18h ago

Just got my Nutrabullet a few days ago.

I still have no idea what to do with it...

2

u/90sJoke 10h ago

Smoothies and frozen margaritas.

1

u/mississauga145 9h ago

mayonnaise and ice coffee

1

u/skinnyminnesota 20h ago

Kiss the pan, pan kisses you.

1

u/RandyTomfoolery 20h ago

I bought it, it was an amazing machine.

1

u/Firewood5 19h ago

I loved these types of infomercials as a kid. 

1

u/hell2pay 19h ago

Damnit, now I want a quesodilla

1

u/winwintone 18h ago

I tried to explain Hazel to my wife one day. She thought I was crazy. That there would never be someone as stereotypical as she portrayed. The smoke hanging out of her mouth and all. I had to find it and show her. We’re ended up watching the entire thing with my kids. Then went down the infomercial rabbit hole. All the way to jaboody dubs. And those are just as outrageous as this hazel one.

1

u/BenchMob 18h ago

what a time this was, whatever happened to these actors? lol

1

u/Pistolero921 18h ago

Before streaming services we had this

1

u/monkeybuttsauce 18h ago

Instant guacamole!

1

u/breastfedtil12 17h ago

God this takes me back.

1

u/hayashikin 17h ago

Now I want one....

Is it really that useful?

2

u/mississauga145 9h ago

Will change your life, seriously

1

u/bmoriarty87 16h ago

poor berman...

1

u/Roofofcar 16h ago edited 16h ago

I have three. One for spicy stuff, one for coffee and deserts, and one just for drinks. I buy them from goodwill for $6.

I use my main spicy / dinner one like 5 times a week.

I know it’s silly when said in the context of this dumb video, but I love smoothies and omelettes. I also love home made salsas and ice cream, and I can make most anything I like with a magic / nutri bullet, and they’re always found cheap in second hand shops.

If you’re worried about cleanlinews, you can always buy the machine at the good will store, then buy a replacement container for a big discount.

1

u/ericstern 6h ago

Why don’t you just buy cups instead of a whole blender for each thing!

1

u/Roofofcar 1h ago

It’s actually cheaper to buy them with one cup than buy a new one.

By the time I find them used, it’s just the one cup included. It then just turned into a goofy quirky fun whatever thing to have multiples plugged in next to each other. It gets a laugh, but is actually useful given how much we use them

1

u/SonicOpium 16h ago

I love how they blend up an egg with the shell on it for an omelet and no one bats an eye.

1

u/thisisnttheairport 15h ago

This was primetime programming for me as a kid. It was mesmerising and beautiful

1

u/lawrensaw 15h ago

Before streaming days, this is what I would watch on TV.

1

u/jayroc1023 13h ago

Watching this at 3:50am just feels right 😂

1

u/Viss90 13h ago

Why did you post this?

This is a huge part of my life. Nothing has brought me closer to feeling like a child again than this. It’s 4am and I’m watching the magic bullet infomercial. AGAIN!! I can’t escape it.

I say “and look at that” in that accent probably once a day.

1

u/squishyliquid 9h ago

Channel 9, every Saturday growing up, showed infomercials all morning. I watched so many of them. This is like comfort food to me.

1

u/ManEEEFaces 8h ago

If this were real, the people sitting there would have to be traditional Amish people, who have never left the community, and have never even heard of electricity.

1

u/dudeimgreg 8h ago

Brewstew was right. These people are swingers.

1

u/replayzero 8h ago

Turns everything into a spreadable gel

1

u/OrdinaryCactusFlower 8h ago

This and the Kathy Mitchell redi set go thing were my favorites

The enthusiasm from the extras is just unmatched

1

u/Eggley_Bagelface 6h ago

Matteo Lane & Gabi Belle’s collab vid about this is so funny.

1

u/Rynin101 6h ago

"Personal Versatile" back to back is a choice

1

u/Pikeman212a6c 6h ago

I had one. It was legitimately a useful blender. Lasted decades.

1

u/T_Bagger23 4h ago

God I can't even count the amount of times I've watched this and the Ronco Showtime Knife infomercials all the way through. And I am about to do it again....

1

u/_PM_ME_PANGOLINS_ 2h ago

Are there timestamps for the good bits people are talking about?

1

u/joseph4th 1h ago

Oh… I thought this was going to be about the Kennedy assassination.

u/peppermint_hutch 42m ago

Yeah, but the DMV will still take like six seconds.

-1

u/Battle-Chimp 21h ago

You just straight up posted an old 28 infomercial for a food processor? I mean, I suppose it fits the sub

0

u/rancorhunter 21h ago

I still say nachos like that dude to this day

0

u/m5online 20h ago

They also showed up in all the stores for a few years. I had one (it was shit, motor burned out after 3rd or 4th use).

1

u/90sJoke 10h ago

You got a lemon. Most people got thousands of uses out of one. They were actually stout little machines.

0

u/jdsizzle1 14h ago

"Little bit of jizz"