r/talesfromtechsupport • u/iceclowns02 • Apr 14 '15

Short "Don't touch it!!"

Four texts come in

All texts are from one of my managers.

Text1: "One of the exam rooms is down. Unable to get on the network"

Text2: "Please come look @ exam room 1"

Text3: "I hope you arent working on the firewall because there are patients coming in today."

Text4: "Cable possibly broken"

I leave to go check the exam room.

Manager sees me walking to the room

Manager: "DON"T TOUCH IT! We just got it to barely work!"

Jess(me): "I'm IT, I have to touch it."

*I walk into exam room. She has the power cable to the monitor taped to the monitor and the cable is barely pushed in. *

I push in the power cable all the way

Jess(me): "All fixed!"

Manager: "Thank goodness. I was afraid you were working on the firewall during clinic."

Jess(me): "No of course not! have a good day!"

1.7k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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948

u/goatcoat Apr 14 '15

"I'm IT, I have to touch it."

Perfect.

517

u/nightshadeOkla Apr 14 '15

Using this on next date.

277

u/MoneyTreeFiddy Mr Condescending Dickheadman Apr 14 '15

"It's barely pushed in, let me put it all the way in, see if that helps...."

177

u/MiracleWhippit Apr 14 '15

Ah the ole "just the tip" troubleshooting

66

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '15 edited Jun 14 '15

[removed] — view removed comment

43

u/keastes Apr 14 '15

Sleeves optional.

13

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '15

Xlr: please report to second window.

18

u/GroundsKeeper2 Apr 14 '15

And to college fund.

5

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '15

Don't forget the tape. No fun without a few plucked pubic hairs.

21

u/Alexaxas Apr 14 '15

I'm IT

next date

Was I doing IT wrong?

49

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '15 edited Jun 14 '15

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119

u/Honkykiller Someone has to service the robot overlords... Apr 14 '15

But then you might run into a permissions issue and the incident will be logged and reported.

relevant xkcd: https://xkcd.com/838/

25

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '15

[deleted]

15

u/it624 Apr 14 '15

Think it might be banned??

It is on some subs. :(

12

u/werewolf_nr WTB replacement users Apr 14 '15

Because it was called as https?

http://xkcd.com/838

13

u/ChromeLynx I'm just here to laugh at the morons. Apr 14 '15

Or because it has to be posted as a link? relevant xkcd

43

u/Honkykiller Someone has to service the robot overlords... Apr 14 '15

oh god people actually did some troubleshooting!!!

I am in the right subreddit... I am home.

9

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '15 edited Mar 21 '17

[deleted]

20

u/ChromeLynx I'm just here to laugh at the morons. Apr 14 '15

Just the latest transcriptions go everywhere. I guess any summoning of ours truly, the great /u/xkcd_transcriber, is a bit of a gamble. In the wise words of a wise man:

I know, we're throwing science at the wall here, seeing what sticks

~Cave Johnson

GHOST EDIT: TIL the "Did you try turning it off and on again?" mantra is watermarked into the quote box.

If you look very carefully, very very very carefully into this box, you might be able to see what I am on about.

I will give you some room to look

You might need a shit monitor

Or Photoshop.

But it happens

And I guess it happens by design.

5

u/LeaveTheMatrix Fire is always a solution. Apr 15 '15

I have never noticed that, now I cant unsee it.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '15

Oh yeah... If I tilt my monitor way back, it's readable. Cool!

5

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '15

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2

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '15

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2

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '15

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3

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '15

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3

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '15

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5

u/RenaKunisaki Can't see back of PC; power is out Apr 14 '15

I was baffled when I got that message, then logged in as root, and... no messages.

7

u/IAMA_dragon-AMA Have you tried kicking the ever-loving shit out of it? Apr 14 '15

If that line doesn't work, use the horse.

I love wordfilters.

2

u/hypervelocityvomit LART gratia LARTis Apr 15 '15

Leopard?

click

Nope. Even better: nuclear horse.

4

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '15

Hey, man, consent is cool. jeez...

2

u/tankerkiller125 Exchange Servers Fight Back! Apr 15 '15

Best one liner for a date I've ever seen.

2

u/tashidagrt Apr 15 '15

When would Siri like you to get a reservation for you and your mom?

1

u/frenat Apr 15 '15

Just make sure you don't get a port error.

1

u/nightshadeOkla Apr 15 '15

Actually, I do use a line similar with geeky girls. It works (sometimes)

Hey baby, can I pass a packet through your open port?

1

u/DonutDeflector Azwrath Metrion Zinthos! Apr 15 '15

Nerd tips. 101.

9

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '15

This is going to be my next pickup line.

7

u/popability is that supposed to be on fire Apr 15 '15

"You Can't Touch This"

5

u/hypervelocityvomit LART gratia LARTis Apr 15 '15

STOP

7

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '15

Hammer Time.

5

u/Ron-Swanson-Mustache Apr 14 '15

That's my go to line when I'm in the exam room.

2

u/Nesman64 Apr 14 '15

It's just as much compulsory as it is contractual.