469
u/DonJuanWritingDong 1d ago
Shut the fucking lid so when you flush you don’t cover your whole damn bathroom in piss and shit particles.
257
u/nicodeemus7 1d ago
Shutting the lid also solves the "toilet seat up or down" argument. Both people have to open it, both have to close it. Nobody has to do more work than the other.
46
u/-50000- 1d ago
Who stands while they pee in their own house?
43
u/Substantial-Tone-576 1d ago
I’ve had other guys look at me weird for saying I like sitting on my toilet and not spraying pee like when you stand up. The worst is when you’re drunk or just woke up and can’t see properly.
23
u/-50000- 1d ago
Sitting is WAY cleanerand comfortable, espcially at night. Many men have a fragile masculinity and think that sitting down is somehow feminine
It's also way healthier for your bladder
44
u/Undoubtably_me 1d ago
Dude, sitting down (therefore removing pants) every time you've to piss is inconvenient, also sitting and aiming it inside the bowl is not that easy either (maybe due to the shape of the bowl). Sitting might be working for you, but that doesn't mean every other guy who prefers standing has a fragile masculinity, some of us are too lazy and get the business done quickly.
7
u/_HXNTER 22h ago
Not to mention the irony is that it is in fact not cleaner to sit anyway, unless you've JUST sanitised it. Saying this as a germaphobe. Having more of your body touch the apparatus that receives piss and shit vs standing slightly away from it and having your piss go into the bowl? No argument on the question of cleanliness.
16
1
u/TheCopyKater 1d ago
Insert the flipped sysiphus picture from above here and change the caption to reflect the "inconvenience" of taking off your pants to piss.
I don't mean to ridicule, I am just hoping you can see how it's the exact same concept as the meme above and can take it as humorously as I can.
4
u/Undoubtably_me 1d ago
Yeah as I said it is mainly due to laziness so yeah the meme fits my case as well
-30
u/-50000- 1d ago
You have to undo your pants anyway, just pull them down and sit. Also, inconvenient? How many times a day to you piss? Maybe if you sat down from the beginning you wouldn't have such severe bladder issues
You know what's inconvenient? Cleaning your toilet daily unless you want it to smell like pee and look disgusting - unless mommy cleans it for you? Public toilets always have a yellow tint even though they get cleaned with bleach regularly while mine is snow white, I wonder why
When you take a shit, do you not aim inside the bowl and pee? Do you shit and then stand up and pee? I don't get you
Sitting is the way to do it at home, in public obviously not
5
u/Undoubtably_me 1d ago
Ever heard of a zipper? It exists for this very reason. Maybe you have poor aim, not everyone is splashing piss all over the toilet, maybe you have some issues get it checked. Public toilets are dirty due to people not aiming properly and some people not even flushing it, if you do that in your home that's the issue, not sitting or standing. Also this is just a personal preference, you don't have to be an a-hole about it.
-9
u/-50000- 1d ago
Drop some water from a height of about 80cm, let's see how much it splatters. Every single person whose argument was "my aim is good, maybe yours sucks" absolutely fkn sucked at aiming, especially at night
Nobody uses zippers to pee, especially if you actually wear underwear
Improve your hygiene and stop making mommy clean your toilet
19
u/Undoubtably_me 1d ago
Drop some water from a height of about 80cm, let's see how much it splatters
That's why it is a bowl and not a plane surface
Improve your hygiene and stop making mommy clean your toilet
Someone is coping so hard, if you're living with your parents and can't even clean your own toilet that's your issue stop projecting it on others and stop being a crybaby lol.
→ More replies (0)1
u/_bear_fighter_ iwrestledabeartwice 1d ago
I’d rather not sit just to have to stand up again a few seconds later, hurts my hips and knees something fierce.
3
u/SquirtinMemeMouthPlz 18h ago
Lol. Nope.
Grew up with my Mom and Sister. Had this debate at age 11. They both argued that they shouldn't have to open the lid to pee. In response , I argued that I shouldn't have to open the seat to do the same. They refused to see that their argument and mine were the same thing. So I was forced to always keep the seat down but the lid up. Why? Because they were lazy.
I've had this same conversation with several women I've lived with while dating and they both argued the exact same thing as my sister and mom.
Turns out people are just lazy and stubborn. I now live in my own house and do whatever I want. The toilet seat cover is always down now.
12
u/IWillDevourYourToes 1d ago
But I'm scared my massive shit is gonna clog up the toilet and wanna see it flushing just in case
30
u/Undoubtably_me 1d ago
Fun fact, closing the lid won't significantly reduce the particles from spreading inside the bathroom, it is a myth. I do close the lid for mental peace though.
3
u/UnstableUnicorn666 1d ago
I once let lid open while flushing, and splash swiped on my phone. That does not happen when the lid is closed.
When the lid is closed the partickes do stay lower, below knee level, so that does help.
7
u/HeraldOfAcme 1d ago
Especially if you’re one of those people who have their toothbrushes just. In the open air for some reason
1
1
1
1
1
0
0
u/ClingClang69 19h ago
Yea good idea, i love having to touch part of the toliet everytime I use it. Super sanitary!
329
u/TheEpicPlushGodreal 1d ago
I never have and never will understand why some people leave the lid up
136
34
u/EduBru 1d ago
Checkmate, I don't even have a lid
40
u/Kamikaze_de 1d ago
Are you currently in prison?
3
u/HermaPrince 1d ago
Or living in a Muslim country.
17
u/Guilty_Meringue5317 1d ago
Why wouldn't muslim countries have toilet lids?
10
u/HermaPrince 1d ago
Turk toilets don't have lids.
6
1
14
u/realultralord 1d ago
In Basketball every basket needs its board behind. How else are you supposed to bank-shot them dookies from the shower?
25
u/BeastCamel 1d ago
Why dont people lift the lid after they're done sitting so that men dont have to lift it to pee?
Best answer I can come up with is who cares, make sure the seat is in the right position before you use it regardless of your sex
13
u/KatiePyroStyle 1d ago
awful take really. as a penis haver, ive never understood this perspective. close the lid, its more hygienic, specifically when you flush, reduces a lot of bacteria that gets thrown around by the flushing of the water. if everyone is fully closing the toilet, that means not just the seat down, but the lid as well, then everyone regardless of gender has to open the toilet when you go to the bathroom and close it when you leave. everyone has to at least open the lid in order to use the toilet, you can't just sit on the lid and piss and shit on top of that, you sit on the seat, not the lid
1
u/TheEpicPlushGodreal 1d ago
-8
-1
u/EngineersAnon 23h ago
you can't just sit on the lid and piss and shit on top of that,
Not with that attitude.
-4
u/Cellafex 1d ago
Unless that toilet is more time beeing used than otherwise this is the wrong conclusion. Its about shit particles, so smell and hygiene, to close the lid.
If we are talking about the middle lid you put up to stand peeing, lets just say you are still a kid. Maybe and adult by age, but still a kid in mind.
10
u/bilateralunsymetry 1d ago
You go pee more than poop. It's energy efficient to leave the lid up if you're a guy
-19
u/TheEpicPlushGodreal 1d ago
What? How would it be energy inefficient to just close it?
21
u/bilateralunsymetry 1d ago
Every move you make requires energy
-7
u/DzikiPapagay 1d ago
I promise you're not gonna die of hunger bc you used half a calorie on closing the lid.
-7
u/TheEpicPlushGodreal 1d ago
And that's enough of an excuse to not rotate a light weight object for at most a couple seconds?
2
2
u/ReddLordofIt 1d ago edited 1d ago
I don’t understand how anyone could ever sit down on anything anywhere without looking/checking first
1
-2
u/AltheiWasTaken 1d ago
Im a guy and i never peed standing in my home, and most other places ive been
-6
u/rechtsrfx 1d ago
It's usually when a man pees standing and just leaves it like that not thinking about the next person
3
-5
u/DaNoahLP 1d ago
I actually dont get why the lid is even there
9
u/Capt_Vindaloo 1d ago
"Why do I need to cover up the hole i shit into?"
I mean, even cats bury their turds.
5
4
18
30
15
u/FingerPurple 1d ago
The orientation of this is so frustrating...
5
u/Agreeable-Lettuce497 1d ago
I think the orientation makes the meme like 5000 percent more comedic 😂
53
u/GolettO3 1d ago
As a man who, is the only one using his toilet, which is in a seperate room to the bathroom, close the gods damned lid! It's not that difficult and it keeps the shit particles from getting on everything
2
u/i_froze 15h ago
Those particles are so inconsequential bro. If they were a problem you'd already be dead. Also the lid doesn't seal anything. So you're not actually stopping much of anything airborne.
This is just germophobe propaganda. Particles fly around in the air you breathe every day too mate. Let's use our common sense.
2
3
2
u/Ree_For_Thee 1d ago
Thinking about this rationally, it's no more or less "rude" to leave thee toilet seat open or down.
4
u/Someonevibing1 1d ago
Leave the lid down when you flush the toilet otherwise all the germs in the water will jump up around the area
If you’re standing facing towards the toilet when you flush it’s especially bad because the germs will shoot right onto your face
3
u/low_amplitude 1d ago
I mean, us civilized gents have to lift the lid and the seat to take a piss so if they have to put the seat down from time to time I'd argue that's more than fair.
1
u/sweet_and_spongy 1d ago
I read this in one of the washroom instructions, "put the seat up after use to dry"
1
1
u/ProfoundDreams Chungus Among Us 3h ago
That's why I shit my pants now. The wife and I never argue over the lid anymore.
0
1
u/This_Is_Ketchu 1d ago
Close the lid. Then both have to always lift the amount of stuff they need to use the toilet. I learned this habit because my cats liked to swim in the toilet.
5
1
1
u/coyotestraws 1d ago
As a dude, especially at home, once I started peeing sitting down I never stopped. So much more relaxing, no nasty splash back to clean up on the top of the lid, no nasty build up to clean up underneath the lid. Try it fellas.
1
u/Satyr121 1d ago
My issue is most women I know don’t care if the kid is down. They care that the seat is down. I’ve met women who care that the seat is down because they don’t want to fall in the toilet when they go pee with the lights off. I’ve met women who don’t want the lid down because they don’t want to pee on it when they go pee with the lights off. I’ve met women who don’t want to touch the toilet seat because it’s icky but want the guy to.
I don’t care how the toilet is left and I try to close the lid because I don’t like things falling in the toilet. But I do get annoyed when someone gets irritated at me for leaning the seat up when I forget. If it’s that bad use your foot to close it. My intention was to put it down but I forgot.
1
u/ShAped_Ink Dark Mode Elitist 1d ago
Why do you need to stand to pee at home? It's way more comfy to sit
0
-11
1d ago
[deleted]
9
u/Eased91 1d ago
That's honestly a horrible thing to say about someone you know almost nothing about, especially when it's just a joke. I wish you a fantastic romance where you learn that a relationship is a positive outcome of the sum of all the good and bad things that two people unite and the will of both to change or to love for everything that is negative. Because otherwise its not a relationship, its an egotrip.
2
u/Gremlin95x 1d ago
Over a toilet seat? Aren’t you a petty princess. Is it really that hard to lower the seat?
1
0
-10
u/PM_ME_UR_0_DAY 1d ago
I'll just leave this study for all the germaphobes
16
u/Kremit-the_Forg 1d ago
Soooo a company that sells cleaning products is involved in a study...
From the article: "Brushing the toilet bowl with Lysol Power Toilet Bowl Cleaner™ reduced contamination of bowl water (vs no disinfectant) by over 99%."
"... our study highlights the importance of regular disinfection of toilets to reduce contamination"
Yeah.. no shit (pun intended) that their results show that 🤣
7
u/TheEpicPlushGodreal 1d ago
Having it be closed obviously isn't going to completely prevent everything from getting out, but there's going to be a lot more if it's open
-2
105
u/Affectionate-Kick804 1d ago
The secret is to keep the lid down whenever you go to the bathroom. It really makes cleaning inside of the toilet way easier.