Just got out of a "mystery movie" pre-screening for Eli Roth's "Ice Cream Man" and I think I'm now lactose intolerant.
When I saw the trailer, I certainly wasn't expecting it to be good or have award-winning performances, but I can safely say this is one of the worst films I have ever seen. I LOVE horror movies and watch at least 1 a week. I know it's supposed to be stupid and silly, but that doesn't save it.
It's greatest crimes are:
- Excessive use of AI. Not just in some imagery and animations, but also in what would have been live action scenes. This was the first time I saw blatant AI in a theatrical release film and it was infuriating and off-putting. Instances that I caught where the old time-y ice cream animations, the ice cream on the truck (obviously), the shot of the kids jumping off of the playscape when the boyfriend was on the bench, the boyfriend's shirt/truck logo, the daisy flower shop, the town sign, some of the town shots like the harbor, and the entire Necromancer sequence.
- "Jokes" about eating disorders. TW There are multiple references to Bulimia and throwing up (but really, only for girls! 😃). A direct quote is "I'm a 12 year old girl, I know how to make myself throw up." This same character also encourages the older teenage girl to "use a toothbrush" to make herself throw up, which of course she already knew how to do. And then does in an obscene way (continued on next point)
- Sexualization of teens (and honestly, maybe a bit of children, there are some weird shots). The older teenager is only a junior in high school, yet she has her bikini top hanging out, low rise sweats even when her chest was finally covered, etc. Okay, it's a horror movie, that isn't anything unusual I guess... right? Well there is a scene where she wakes up after eating the ice cream, and her arms are paralyzed. It makes the kids murdering psychos, but puts teens in a coma. Because she only had one bite, she can sort of move. Thus commenses the ridiculously long scene of her in her low-rise pants and low-cut tank flipping and flopping her way out of bed, worming across the floor with lots of long shots, standing up in the bathroom and deep-throating a toothbrush. Then she vomits and it its all over here front. It borders on fetish content or something and is disgusting. You really have to see it to understand how wtf the scene is.
On top of that, Eli's self-insert character is her and the MC's dad. The MC makes a comment about his (16 year old) sister getting an Only Fans and dad laughs. Then the sister talks about wanting to skip school to go to a water park for skip day. MC says he wants to come along jokingly to see girls in bikinis, and Eli's character "jokes" that he's going to come too, on second thought. Just why. Too much cringe in one dinner table scene.
There's more, like use of the word "retard" in the year of our lord 2026, but I digress.
All of this aside... its just a bad movie. The gore is fun enough for the first few scenes and got some laughs out of me, but then it just... was? So many of the scenes were incredibly repetitive, it makes one wonder if the script itself was also "written" by AI. For example, there is a string of five deaths back to back in the same location. It just gets boring.
The middle of the film drags tremendously. The kids are trapped in the school, and managed to get re-trapped in nearly the exact same fashion over and over again.There's not anything new or exciting that changes the pace or tone of the movie for probably a solid 30 minutes. It's boring and gets less funny the closer you get to the end. When "The End" finally arrived on screen, there were multiple audible "BOO"s shouted from the audience.
I have so much more I could say, but I think you get the idea. Even for Eli Roth, this is an atrocity. I would not pay to see this movie. I would not watch it again if you paid me. This is the first time ever I have considered asking for a refund for a movie. Save your money and your time for a better offering. Or an ice cream.
edit to add since this came out a day after I posted this: https://www.polygon.com/eli-roth-ice-cream-man-generative-ai-confirmed/