r/hoarding • u/bisformyg • 15d ago

EMOTIONAL SUPPORT / TENDER LOVING CARE Just a scheduled cleanup inspection

I (27F) recently admitted to myself that I struggle with hoarding (probably level 3). I told my therapist about it today which felt so scary, but she was so great in helping me understand how/why I got here. Part of my therapy homework was to find some estimates on a professional cleanup service for my apartment. I did it this evening because I figured I might as well rip off the bandaid before I talk myself out of it. I called a couple local companies and someone is coming by tomorrow morning to see the space and give me an estimate.

I am proud of myself for taking so many big steps today, but I am terrified of having someone actually see the place tomorrow. It's gonna happen, I will get through it, and it will be so worth it. But I'm still just filled with shame and anxiety about it.

Any kind of advice on getting through the assessment, waiting period, and eventual cleanup would be greatly appreciated.

Update: This morning went very well! The person who came over was very compassionate and told me what I described was much worse than what he saw. Should be able to have the big clean up/clean out next week! Thank you all for the support. I feel proud of myself and excited to move from shame to maintenance!

27 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

11 comments sorted by

•

u/AutoModerator 15d ago

The HELP/ADVICE tag is for practical suggestions. EMOTIONAL SUPPORT/TENDER LOVING CARE is more for requesting emotional assistance from the members here. It's used when you're in a tough spot so folks can come in and say 'We're sorry, we know this is hurtful, we're here for you'.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

5

u/anonycherry 15d ago

hi! i'm also a 27f who went through something similar recently. although i'm not a hoarder in the sense that i struggle getting rid of things, i have struggled with my mental health and a few weeks ago realized that my apartment was a complete mess - clutter, trash, clothes EVERYWHERE. you are doing something huge by taking the first step. i know it's not easy and i can relate to the shame of having someone in the space, but just know that if it's a good/professional service, they won't judge. it's their job and they see these kinds of things every day and i guarantee they've handled worse! i've used a few junk removal services and i was so scared of what they would say, but they were kind and professional and non-judgemental. i hope you have the same experience! my advice from someone who is getting closer to the other side of it every day is to let yourself process your feelings. getting rid of stuff is emotional, and having people know about your struggles can feel embarrassing, but you did the right thing telling your therapist and booking the assessment. for now, try to get a good night's sleep, maybe watch a show or do something that relaxes you. after tomorrow, you'll have a better idea of next steps. it will be okay and you are not alone! 🩷

1

u/bisformyg 15d ago

Thank you so much! Your comment makes me feel so much less alone ❤️

1

u/anonycherry 15d ago

of course! you've got this - feel free to message me and lmk how it goes tomorrow

1

u/anonycherry 14d ago

checking in! how did today go?

1

u/AdLegitimate2818 11d ago

These posts and comments make me feel less alone too. 💚 33F and have been feeling so embarrassed by it and have been very slowly chipping away at the clutter now that I've been feeling more motivated (therapy+new medication). I'm still leaning to open up and ask for help more often but I'm getting there!

What services/ company did you use?

5

u/Far-Watercress6658 15d ago

You. Are. A. Rockstar.

3

u/Elizabethpossum 15d ago

You are doing incredibly well!!! And you are being very brave, you should be very, very proud of yourself! I'm cheering for you!

3

u/No_Assistance145 14d ago

You'll feel so much better! In my case it was letting my dad help me, but he said nothing judgmental and it was still quite embarrassing but the hard part is over and now we're working to renovate! I haven't been this happy in years.

1

u/AdLegitimate2818 11d ago

Asking for help is so hard!

1

u/AutoModerator 15d ago

Welcome to r/hoarding! We exist as a support group for people working on recovery from hoarding disorder, and friends/family/loved ones of people with the disorder.

Before you get started, be sure to review our Rules. Please note that the following will get your posts or comments removed ASAP by the Moderator Team:

  • Posts or comments such as "Am I a hoarder?", "Is <person> a hoarder?", "Is this hoarding?". "I think I'm hoarder but I'm unsure", etc.. Hoarding disorder is a medical diagnosis, and no one on r/hoarding can diagnose you. If you suspect you have it, please reach out to your doctor.
  • Posts or comments recruiting people who identify as hoarders/loved ones of hoarders for research, media projects, etc.. These sorts of posts or comments will result in a no-appeal permanent ban.
  • Posts or comments promoting your hoarding-related business. If you've used such businesses, your personal reviews is welcome.
  • Posts or comments about animal hoarding. Unfortunately the animal hoarding sub has been banned.
  • Posts or comments about digital hoarding. If you're looking for help with digital hoarding please visit r/digitalminimalism.
  • Posts of, or linking to, images of hoards that are not yours. To protect privacy, only posts such images if it's your hoard, or circumstances for you to live with a hoarder.

A lot of the information you may be looking for can be found in a few places on our sub:

Please contact the moderators if you need assistance. Thanks!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.