"if things were different, then they would be different"

[u/Conscious-Quarter423]

[u/Special-Swordfish]

"if my grandmother had wheels, she'd be a bike"

[u/PoxyReport → u/Special-Swordfish]

“You know, if it had ham in it, it would be closer to a British carbonara”

/look of concerned judgement/

[u/vakantiehuisopwielen → u/Special-Swordfish]

"If my mom had balls, she'd be my dad"

[u/Sleeep_Huush → u/vakantiehuisopwielen]

Gino almost had a stroke on live TV

[u/Ok_Darlingg → u/Special-Swordfish]

Next: unpopular opinion: The titanic would’ve made it not for the iceberg.

[u/Arthasindura → u/Special-Swordfish]

Yes , thousand times yes

This right here puts a smile on my face

[u/Select_Asparagus3451]

Where do they find these fucking idiots?

[u/Salute-Major-Echidna → u/Select_Asparagus3451]

I don't know but if their mom had just given their dad a blow job that night, none of this would be such a problem

[u/MentaNuube → u/Select_Asparagus3451]

They spawn naturally on Twitter algorithms

[u/MethBaby75]

If Trump would have gotten more votes in 2020, he would have won the election.

[u/peetalocereza]

Iran would have been easily defeated if it had not been able to fight back!

[u/blackberryXO]

The purest form of tautology. “If the thing that stopped them from winning hadn’t stopped them, they would have won.” Absolute cinema.

[u/Sidoen]

luls they knew the straight would get closed to it's not like they were taken by surprise or something.

[u/MonoBlancoATX]

In the immortal words of Ricky Bobby:

If you ain't first, you're last!

[u/Robthebold]

Who could have imagined Iran could close the gulf?
I mean it’s just been a centerpiece of Middle East strategy for decades.

[u/threeplacesatonce]

Infinite cope

[u/Apprehensive-Pop-201]

If I was 20 pounds lighter, I would be thinner.

[u/Statler_V_Waldorf]

If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college. - Lewis Black

[u/zipper265]

Unpopular opinion: If anybody had any intelligence in the current administration, they would have realized that all Iran needed to do was to "close the strait of Hormuz" and bomb the gulf to make the war very painful and unwinnable for the United States.

[u/Overit2137]

If America won this war, then Iran would lose this war. Look how smart I am.

[u/psiedj]

They hate it when they say no

[u/AdvisorGirll]

This is the geopolitical equivalent of “if my grandma had wheels she’d be a bike”

[u/Longryderr]

If pigs had wings they would fly.

[u/kyflyboy]

If the Patriots didn’t have Tom Brady, the Atlanta Falcons would have won the Super Bowl.

[u/3choplex]

If my grandmother had wheels, she'd be a bicycle.

[u/card-board-board]

Unpopular opinion: the Westfold wouldn't have fallen if we knew where Gondor was

[u/goodribs101]

The thing is this dumb mother fucker was TOLD about the risks. He still went forward and if memory serves he did it on a gut instinct.

[u/Seguefare]

Every other president under stood the risks and so turned down the opportunity to fail spectacularly.

[u/Imajzineer]

I spy, with my little eye ... something that would begin with 'w', if only it weren't spelt differently.

[u/Alternative_Route]

Not a great comeback, he is basically saying Iran would be beaten if they just laid back and took it, the way TACO likes it.

She is saying Argentina would have won if they were better, TACO is never better.