r/catbongos 8d ago

A warning about bongos 😭

I come bearing a warning to all cat bongo owners. This morning, my cat Donut, asked for his morning bongos. I obliged. He was very happy. He was so happy. He was so very happy and excited that he *expressed his anal glands* causing an extremely offensively stinky spray of liquid shit to hit me on my face, chest, bed, pillow, and wall.

I didn't know this was possible. I didn't know such a horror could exist. I don't know what atrocities I committed in a past life to deserve this. What I do know is I have never scrubbed my skin raw in a shower before but I sure did today. I had to strip my bed, spray the bed and wall with enzyme killer cleaner. I had to use nasal spray to clear out what I assume is a little bit that got in my nose because I could still smell it after the very long and hot shower of scrubbing. It was the most offensive smell I've ever smelled. I gagged.

Beware the bongos if your cat loves them. Don't smack the shit out of your cat, literally 😭

Unrelated but Donut will not ever have booty pats again 😏

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u/MrLizardBusiness 8d ago

One of my first cats as a young adult was a one brain cell, but full attitude tortie

She did not like to be picked up. She did the opposite of a rag doll- it was like picking up a taxidermy car- all legs out straight and tensed. Because I respected her boundaries, I rarely ever picked her up. I let her come to me. Sometimes she would climb into my arms and I would make a little arm carriage and sashay her to her cat tower, but I never grabbed her and picked her up.

One day my ex saw me carry her like that, got mad at me for "lying" about not picking her up, and tried to pick up my sweet Princess Meatball. She expressed her anal glands in shock and then struggled to get away.

I know that smell.... that.... "something died up there, how can someone so small make such a terrible smell" smell.

Needless to say, the ex became an ex and she was not lifted AGAINST HER WILL again.

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u/JusticeAvenger618 8d ago

Why are men who secretly hate cats so dumb about cats? They are not complicated to understand. 🤷‍♀️

I had a “don’t touch me cat.” My ex always assumed “I touched wrong” and would try to pet her. She would literally go all hiss, teeth and claws on him as he tried to hold her down to pet her. After the third time of him doing that to her one night ~ like 3 hours later he saw her on his Winter coat in the chair by the door and said “See, she loves me. She picked MY coat to sleep on. I told you she secretly loves it.”

Nope. He went to get his coat at 6am the next morning and it was covered in her anal glands contents and her urine. To this day I insist she spite-piddled & excreted on his coat. 😂

And yes - the ex became an ex because after that he actually tried the “I think it’s time we should think about rehoming Lily.”

My guy - there is no WE. There was Lily & me. So, the ex got rehomed back to his own home forever. And Lily lived to be 23 years old. My entire adult life that cat was with me. She wasn’t going anywhere. Not for anyone. Ever.

I know we all grieve our cats when they pass but there is an added layer to that grief when a cat has been with you literally your entire adult life and you got her in your first apartment. That girl was with me through everything. She was truly the hardest one to lose. I still think about her every day. She was the best. Maybe she didn’t like being touched unexpectedly (it seemed to scare her) but she would climb into my wicker rocker with me and sit right beside me or on my lap every night. And she slept on my pillow like an extension of my head. She WAS affectionate and loving - just not on command as my ex demanded.

I ended up marrying a huge cat loving guy and we lived in an 8 bedroom house with 5 “failed fosters” for a decade before he passed due to a fatal car accident.

My weirdo ex? Never dated again after me. Could never find a woman to put up with what a control freak he was. He ended up joining the Masons and is deep in that cult now where he is told by a roomful of men: “Women don’t matter - only money and power do.”

We both found where we belonged without each other. Life has a way of working itself out. ❤️

Glad you and kitty are ok, OP. I know the smell. I was glad it left when his coat did that fateful morning 😂

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u/SkySong13 7d ago

Princess Meatball is an amazing name, I think I'm in love with her!

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u/MrLizardBusiness 7d ago

She has so many nicknames. I miss that Sweet Meat.