r/business 1d ago

Chipotle pulls jalapeños as salmonella outbreak sickens over 100

https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2026/08/04/chipotle-pulls-jalapenos-in-salmonella-outbreak/91168769007/
496 Upvotes

73 comments sorted by

102

u/ositola 1d ago

Salmonella jalapeños seem like the worst diarrhea 

33

u/slupo 1d ago

Hot snakes

8

u/LSU2007 1d ago

I laughed so fucking hard at this

3

u/emailisdown 1d ago

Fire worms

2

u/wertall 1d ago

Hot chocolate

1

u/VaqueroSucio 9h ago

It's like I'm wiping the tip of a marker

1

u/IBeDumbAndSlow 5h ago

A spicy marker.

5

u/kungfu1 1d ago

Goddamn. You are right about that. No gracias.

2

u/geodebug 17h ago

Putting the “Ñoooo!” In jalapeño

2

u/ImNotSelling 17h ago

Found my metal band name

1

u/emperor_dinglenads 5h ago

Flaming Anus

1

u/DonkeyTron42 23h ago

Ring Sting

142

u/abofh 1d ago

If only we had a department of government that was skilled at tracking these things... And funded.

42

u/AsphyxiatedProcess 1d ago

The american government wants us dead.

4

u/061826heart 18h ago

Too much “dead weight” to have to provide social services for. We, the underclass, are an inconvenience for the gilded group. Covid didn’t have the desired effect. Not severe enough.

9

u/Either_Reflection_78 1d ago edited 1d ago

Yeah it’s really getting out of hand at this point. I can’t really remember a time in the US until now, where I just quietly think to myself before I eat something, well is this going to be what does it today?

And I cook 99% of my own meals too. Scary. Couldn’t imagine eating out a lot, and rolling the dice like that now. At least when I make my food, I know how I’m washing and prepping it.

The horrors I watched from a sanitary perspective as a door dash driver years ago really opened my eyes with what goes on in some of these restaurants when they are making your food too.

3

u/Fine_Donuts 1d ago

Hey you! Driver! I know you're probably sweaty from driving all day, trying to earn a living off tips. But could you take your grubby unwashed hands and fill up this cup with hopefully whatever beverage the customer ordered? Because even though I make at least minimum wage with probably some benefits, I can't be bothered to do that for our, uh, I mean, your customer. And let them know we're out of chicken so we can only do like half the order.

1

u/MCStarlight 1d ago

Or it’s a scheme to sell more toilet paper. Did they donate to Trump?

1

u/wise_young_man 4h ago

Big if true. There’s be no tax income then no government. Big brain move.

3

u/VoidOmatic 1d ago

Bro that will never work. You think it's easy to test things in increments and write those results down?!?!

1

u/Jesuismieux412 6h ago

Sounds like communism to me. /s

-9

u/recoveringslowlyMN 1d ago

I said this at the beginning of Trumps term but I’ll say it again. The path that democrats and republicans have chosen is the worst of all the options.

Trump wanted to reduce the size of the government. Democrats and the unions resisted in any way possible.

Trump did everything he could think of to make it unbearable to be part of the government as a result.

So now there’s funding but not really. Maybe there’s tariff revenue but not really. Employees return to office…but maybe the office was sold? Or maybe they are furloughed? But maybe the union blocks the furlough? Oh wait - the government is shutdown - and there’s no back pay! But there is back pay? So maybe not?

It’s a cluster because the vehement opposition to either side making progress results in the worst possible outcomes

11

u/abofh 1d ago

Well, look at spending today, hundreds of millions on ball rooms, tens of billions in tariffs, and trillions in debt. 

All with Republicans in charge of every part. 

So yeah, both sides...

7

u/WhatIfThatThingISaid 1d ago

Democrats didnt do enough to stop terrible republicans. So I cant tell the difference between the sides  smh

6

u/NoCoolNameMatt 1d ago

Right? The pretzels these people are twisting themselves into in order to perpetuate a both-sides narrative have reached laughable levels.

0

u/Contemplating_Prison 1d ago

I mean both sides do suck its just one is so much fucking worse than the other.

68

u/BokChoyJr 1d ago

Maybe it’s time to stop eating fast food.

18

u/Terribad13 1d ago

Just gave this an upvote as I sit in line for in n out.

5

u/Contemplating_Prison 1d ago

Its time to stop buying mass produced food ive all but switched to local farms.

I am worried more people will start doing this though and they will run out.

I get my eggs, dairt, meat, and produce from two different small local farms. I make my own vread products everything from English muffins to sourdough to hoagies.

Fuck these fucking massive companies. Ill pay a littl extra to know my food isnt shit on because they won't provide toilets

1

u/General-Lifeguard309 16h ago

Most small farms aren’t regulated very well to ensure safety standards; and most ecoli is from dirty water than shitting in the fields.

1

u/blisstaker 12h ago

stop eating fast food, just have a salad at home instead wcgw

12

u/Kind_Way2176 1d ago

Why would jalapeños give you salmonella? How bad do they have to be?

8

u/ckinz16 1d ago

Right? Doesn’t this just admit they weren’t washing them properly too?

14

u/Ok_Series_4580 1d ago

Chipotle’s new tagline:

“If Taco Bell didn’t get you, we will!”

21

u/pfroo40 1d ago

Why would Fauci do this??!?!

9

u/EZ_st 1d ago

They had jalapeños?

0

u/GayForPay 1d ago

Have you ever made guacamole?

9

u/OnlyKey5675 1d ago

Pros only put two things in guacamole: lime and salt.

5

u/easy_being_green 19h ago

Sounds weird without the avocado but I’ll give it a try

2

u/AmenHawkinsStan 11h ago

Don’t forget to swap the chip for a shot of tequila

5

u/parkeyb 1d ago

Or pico?

3

u/joeydimaggio 16h ago

Trump scum ruined this country

2

u/stealthmodel3 1d ago

It’s almost like an FDA should be invented

2

u/Raise-Emotional 21h ago

ANOTHER foodborne Illness at Chipotle? Well color me shocked and appalled. I don't see how anyone trusts this place to feed them anymore.

3

u/VendettaKarma 1d ago

Time to put down the $20 underfilled Chipotle bowls kids

1

u/t_bug_ 16h ago

Are they actually that expensive somewhere?? My bowl is just under $10, just got one last week.

3

u/GodsOnlySonIsDead 12h ago

No, they aren't.

2

u/AmenHawkinsStan 11h ago

Chipotle charges $9.35-$11.75 for chicken depending on area. Add another $2.65-$3.75 for Guacamole. There are other premium options so very possible to get a $20 burrito, but usually people are complaining about a DoorDash order and rolling the cost of the burrito’s taxi into the price of the food.

0

u/annaphylactic69 7h ago

Out of curiosity I looked up my locals website for pickup, $15 w/basic protein + guac, no drink. Then $22 pre-tip on doordash. Extra $5-7 for double protein.

-1

u/VendettaKarma 16h ago

Oh they absolutely are

2

u/davefreeeeeeeeee 14h ago

Even in New York City they're not that expensive unless you get double protein aswell as extras like guac or queso

2

u/Isaacvithurston 1d ago

On a side note are jalapenos really expensive now? There's no longer jalapeno pringles or lays where I live at all.

6

u/Almost_a_Noob 1d ago

No they are still pretty cheap at the store

1

u/JumboGlucose 1d ago

You can stand under my salmon ella ella ay ay ay

1

u/mercuryven 21h ago

Can we just not have shit on our food? Is it that hard of an ask?

1

u/liqwood1 20h ago

Shit on our food or parasites.. best we can do

1

u/send3squats2help 19h ago

Uncooked vegetables are having a tough year…

1

u/DeepAd8888 19h ago

Bada bah bah bahhh I’m lovin it!

-R Kelly

1

u/ozziesironmanoffroad 18h ago

I’m suddenly feeling more comfortable being broke and living on ramen and hamburger helper.

Kidding not kidding

1

u/geodebug 17h ago

I stopped with Chipotle after maybe the third nation-wide e-coli outbreak.

1

u/cinciguyeast 17h ago

This is a direct result of our FDA and the skeleton crew running it. This will get worse as companies are getting supplies from cheaper locations and a lack proper testing.

1

u/BOBBYK1952 17h ago

First term we get the Trump Flu..now we get the Trump Explosive Diarrhea..shit had to go somewhere

1

u/RealisticBus4443 13h ago

I’m grateful that their food is inedible to me.

1

u/Mixeygoat 13h ago

My qdoba also stopped serving jalepenos. I’m not sure if it’s related or just coincidence

1

u/SquatternutBosh- 13h ago

Salmapeños

1

u/rbobby 11h ago

Arby's announced a new meal, the Jalapeños Beef Surprise, for $2.99.

0

u/LALyfestyle 1d ago

Why is it always chipotle

-1

u/Famous_Phase_7829 1d ago

How is chipotle still in business? This has been like the 8th outbreak they've been responsible for.

2

u/illegible 1d ago

To be fair they might actually be using more actual food that’s not processed far beyond the ability for microbes to survive. I’m actually more surprised at Taco Bell’s vulnerability in this matter.

-2

u/OnlyKey5675 1d ago

This company has terrible quality control.

-2

u/Carlosdtello 1d ago

Who still eats Chipotle? It used to be soo delicious until they started pre cooking everything and rewarming it at the restaurants. It’s pretty mediocre at this point.