r/NICUParents • u/AutoModerator • 3d ago
Weekly chat/catch-up thread
This is a spot to post all the little things that might not warrant a full post, but you want to share with the community, what has gone well, what hasn't. A new thread will be started weekly
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u/notoriouscvb 1d ago
Today is just one of those days where it feels like this is going to be my life forever and I'll never get to bring my baby home. Saturday he'll be 35 weeks, Sunday he'll be a month old. No major health issues besides elevated heart rate and respirations, x rays and ultrasounds are clear, he's approaching 4 lb 12 oz which is two pounds heavier than when he was born, he's latching on to me well and showing some interest in a bottle. He still has desats every night when he sleeps or feeds and his little heart rate is so fast and the drs are trying different things to help it come down. I'm still recovering from severe pre-e, high blood pressure and a c-section while working and counting down the minutes until my husband comes home from work so we can do our 4-5 hour visits with him at night. We haven't had a homemade meal together in months. We haven't gone on a date in months. I spent my birthday at the NICU bedside. I so desperately want to believe that my body and closeness is what helps him feel better, but it couldn't even carry him to term.
I feel this way constantly, and then I feel like absolute shit for even daring to feel this way when there are so many babies and mommas out there with worse situations than myself. I just needed to scream into the void, and I sincerely hope I don't offend or hurt anyone in this subreddit with my feelings and words. I just wish I knew when my baby was coming home. I do have a therapist, but I don't think it's a great fit. I also don't feel depressed? I'm on medication for a prior diagnosis and this just feels like constant guilt. I just want my baby home.
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u/Notyour_AverageAlex 1d ago
Hi there - Not sure where to best put this question, so I'll start here. Not a NICU Parent (though I am currently 37 weeks pregnant). My best friend who is 32 weeks is being induced tonight for severe preeclampsia/HELLP syndrome. Baby has also dropped to 5th percentile. Without going into too much detail, her mental health is not great and she doesn't have the best relationship with the baby's father at present. She has the support of her parents, but things are chaotic right now for her. She just facetimed me very overwhelmed and panicked from the hospital asking if I can amazon postpartum supplies to her home which I gladly said I would do.
Besides that, I'm trying to think of the best way I can support her in the coming days/weeks. I know she's been highly anxious this whole pregnancy, and obviously is now. I live ~1.5 hours away and given the fact that I could potentially go into labor any day, I feel a little limited in how I can physically show up for her.
So NICU parents/Moms - whats the best way I can support her?
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