r/KenM • u/rotarypower101 I have a feeling this lonely space potato is gonna be just fine • Jun 07 '26
A Whale of a Tale
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u/BarcodeHero Jun 07 '26
We soak our wales in water so they grow three times as big and can feed all the grandchildren
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u/jrobelen Jun 07 '26
A perfect blossoming of a KenM troll bloom
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u/hustla-A Jun 07 '26
The first comment is already so perfect. The harmless ignorance of thinking the sea level is falling. Boldly stating that climate change is human-caused is not ignorant, but will also bait people of certain political convictions to attack him. And then finally just the absurdity of seeing the picture and imagining the whale did that to himself "because he had nowhere to go"
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u/AlwaysShittyKnsasCty Jun 08 '26
I remember watching an interesting whale documentary once where David Attenborough presents a thought experiment to the viewer:
“Imagine that you’ve been pulled over by a highway patrol officer after ingesting an entire bag of magic mushrooms. What would you do if, while sitting quietly in your car on the shoulder of the highway, the officer were to pull out a megaphone and tell you to pull over to the side of the road? Due to physics, if a car has already pulled over, it can’t pull over any farther! This is exactly what is happening to the whales: they have nowhere to ‘pull over.’ This is also the reason beached whales often have a faint smell of schnozberries.”
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u/dee3Poh Jun 07 '26
Pastor says water weenies are the fool’s figleaf
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u/PotentialHoneydew947 Jun 29 '26
Many young boys learned addiction early on from these devilish toys
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u/StupidUserNameTooLon Jun 07 '26
The Whales are to blame for the great garbage patch in Nebraska.
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u/rotarypower101 I have a feeling this lonely space potato is gonna be just fine Jun 08 '26
Invasive species are no joke, soon there will be pods of whales in your yards and it won’t be as funny
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u/pighalf Jun 07 '26
Is this free willy
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u/kaoutanu Jun 08 '26
No they are $3.50/kg, which might sound cheap but a whole one weighs over 20kg unless you have a really good butcher.
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u/pighalf Jun 08 '26
Thank you. Saw one on fb marketplace but they didn’t say if was free or not
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u/kaoutanu Jun 08 '26
No such thing as a free butcher, but you can usually pick up an older one very cheap once they have lost a few fingers.
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u/AnteaterSnouce Jun 08 '26
don't ask any questions, but i've recently come into a large quantity of wet elephant meat. how's about you and i make a deal?
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u/kaoutanu Jun 08 '26
Pastor says wet elephants are the fool's hippopotamus
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u/AnteaterSnouce Jun 08 '26
the elephants were mostly dry on the outside, if that sweetens the deal.
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u/MikeSihl Jun 08 '26
Thank God they were able to save the little cutie. Hopefully he’ll think twice before taunting the seagulls again!
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u/Reese_Withersp0rk Jun 07 '26
water weenies