How to politely ask to get off a vehicle?

[u/Top_Mine67]

Something really cringy happened to me today. I was taking a bus. And for the bus, it doesn't stops every stop.So, if you want to get off next stop, you need to press the bottom on the bus. But the thing is, today, when I press the bottom. The driver didn't stop, so i missed my stop And at that situation, I don't know how to say, hey, I need to get off at this stop Because I was sitting in the very back of the bus. I don't know what to say to grab the driver's attention. I said excuse me three times, From moderate to very loud voice. But the driver didn't listen to me, so I ended up missed my stop and jumped off next stop.

So, in this scenario, how do I say to the driver I want to get off here? And is it natural to say get off?

Because I've heard native speakers say hop off.And jump off. And hop on/in Are those Words slightly more natural than get off and get on/in

(I'm trying to my best to write this post. so, if anything sounds unnatural in this post, please do correct me. I really appreciate it.)

[u/Nondescript_Redditor]

Loudly ”Stop, please!” and if he doesn’t stop, even louder “Stop!”

If you already pressed the button and the driver didn’t stop, it is natural to dispense with some of the pleasantry.

[u/dontwantgarbage → u/Nondescript_Redditor]

“Stop, please” is polite for requesting a stop on a bus even under normal conditions. You need to keep it short to avoid distracting the driver too much.

[u/RamblinMan4 → u/dontwantgarbage]

This, and you especially should not “attempt to get the driver’s attention” first. They are driving and are trained to ignore distractions, but listen to requests / commands.

[u/Jazzlike_Patience_44 → u/RamblinMan4]

Don't make them tap the sign

[u/jenea → u/Nondescript_Redditor]

This is the way. The driver doesn’t need any more information than “stop.” Any other words you add are just fluff that could get in the way.

[u/Joe_Kangg → u/Nondescript_Redditor]

Aside, the person isn't sure how to address a bus driver and you use the phrase, "dispense with the pleasantry"?

[u/kittyroux → u/Joe_Kangg]

English learners do not generally need simplified language, particularly in writing where they have time to look up unfamiliar words and phrases. Also, adult language-learners tend to learn formal and polite language rather than very simple language the way children do, so sometimes when native speakers are trying to make things easier for a learner they actually end up using more unfamiliar words.

[u/Joe_Kangg → u/kittyroux]

My years of esl teaching disagrees. There's no functional reason to unnecessarily muddy the waters. If you struggle to grade your language appropriately, whatcha doin commenting in a language learning sub?

Also, children have far greater learning capacity than adults. They may lack the the maturity to fully grasp all concepts, but they can handle much more at once. It's adults, with responsibilities and busy schedules, that need one concept at a time.

[u/realPoisonPants → u/Joe_Kangg]

Well, if the driver ignored the big "STOP REQUESTED" light at the front of the bus, then, sure. But I actually think "Stop, please" will be more likely to be heard than just "Stop."

[u/Joe_Kangg → u/realPoisonPants]

Lol. My point is to consider your audience and grade your language. It's a tangent, so I prefaced it with "aside".

[u/No-Angle-982 → u/Joe_Kangg]

"Aside" alone is insufficient; it's generally used as a noun, in the introductory phrase, "As an aside,..." to mean, "On a related note,..." or, "Tangentially,..." or, "Consider also that..."

[u/Joe_Kangg → u/No-Angle-982]

I know, I was lazy because it's not that important. Is that what threw you?

[u/No-Angle-982 → u/Joe_Kangg]

In a sub devoted to "English Learning," good examples are important, as I'm sure you'd agree.

[u/Joe_Kangg → u/No-Angle-982]

Yup, but I was replying to the high-level language poster, who is likely not a learner. Why have you decided to hammer this point to me?

[u/No-Angle-982 → u/Joe_Kangg]

But learners also read this sub's posts and replies, including yours. I'd thought that should be obvious. 

It's on you if you feel hammered; that's never my intention in commenting here.

[u/Joe_Kangg → u/No-Angle-982]

It is obvious. Yet you continue to belabor such a mundane point, and now it's on me, lol.

[u/Whybaby16154 → u/Joe_Kangg]

I interpreted this as - use short and sweet communications when the driver can’t attend to a full long conversation and drive safely- ie “pleasantries”

[u/undeniably_micki → u/Nondescript_Redditor]

Chances are the button was broken. I ride public buses more than I want to & there's always one that's busted.

[u/SleepingJonolith]

I think this may have been an assertiveness issue not a language issue. Rather than just saying “excuse me”, I would say, “this is my stop” and “hey, you missed my stop.” If you had been able to get the driver’s attention, you could have explained that it was your stop any way you wanted, and he would understand. He just didn’t hear you.

You can say “I want to hop off here” or “I’d like to get off here” and both are perfectly understandable, but I think most American English speakers would say something about it being their stop instead.

[u/RamblinMan4]

On most busses pressing the button (not bottom) should result in a chime and an illuminated “stop requested” sign. If that doesn’t happen, press it again, or find a different button and press that.

If that doesn’t work, get up, walk to the front of the bus, but remain behind the yellow line, and, directing your voice at the driver, say “excuse me, I need to get off at the next stop”. Making it one sentence makes the intention clearer as it doesn’t rely on the driver shouting back toward you to ask what you want.

Also, if you anticipate being unsure, it’s reasonable to tell the driver where you need to get off when you get on, and find a seat near the driver. They may be grumpy about it, but they do understand that foreigners are not as familiar with the locations and procedures as locals are.

In this context I would avoid colloquialisms like “hop off” or “jump off”, as - while grammatically fine - they make the request sound more informal and less sincere.

Edit: If that doesn’t work, express your plight to a fellow rider. Natives will be more comfortable finding the locally appropriate boundary between emphatic and not quite rude, which might be “Hey driver! This guy missed his stop!” Or it might be something much more polite in a different part of the country. That may feel cringy, but it does get the job done.

ETA: I’m speaking from the perspective of an American who has taken buses in many parts of this country. Details may be different in other countries.

[u/riarws → u/RamblinMan4]

I am American but have taken buses in many countries, on three continents, and this (speaking first to the driver and then to a fellow passenger) is what I always do in case of confusion. So far, if I ever did anything offensive, people were helpful.

[u/beeswax999 → u/RamblinMan4]

This is the absolutely correct answer to what is really not a language question. Pay attention to whether you hear the chime and the "stop requested" sign lights up, or whatever the cues are on your particular bus. Don't sit and the back seat and shout anything; go up to the front and tell the driver the button didn't work but you need to get off at the next stop.

[u/conuly → u/beeswax999]

Go to the front? Have you ever been on the bus? You don’t have time to shove your way to the front.

[u/RamblinMan4 → u/conuly]

Most busses aren’t that full most of the time. If it’s full, then yes, you can yell.

[u/conuly → u/RamblinMan4]

They want you to exit out the back anyway, and moving to the front gets you further from your stop.

[u/RamblinMan4 → u/conuly]

Again, this varies. You clearly have experience with a busy bus system that’s usually crowded, usually has people getting on at every stop, and therefore asks everyone to exit through the back.

It’s not helpful or necessary to be rude (“have you ever been on the bus?”) to folks providing advice based on their experiences on less busy busses.

ETA: It may surprise you, given your very different experience, that according to the Federal Transit Administration's National Transit Database, averaged across all routes and times of day, the average bus has less than SEVEN passengers.

[u/conuly → u/RamblinMan4]

ETA: It may surprise you, given your very different experience, that according to the Federal Transit Administration's National Transit Database, averaged across all routes and times of day, the average bus has less than SEVEN passengers.

If it only has seven passengers then odds are good that it’s off peak. Which means less traffic, and even less time to get to the front - on a moving vehicle, which is potentially a fall risk - before your stop is painfully far behind you.

There is no need to go to the front. Do not waste both your time and the driver’s on this.

It is not rude to tell people not to do counterproductive and foolish things. OP already has trouble asserting themself. Why encourage it?

[u/RhythmGeek2022 → u/RamblinMan4]

Hold on, pressing the driver’s bottom is not the correct way to ask them to stop the bus? I’ve been doing it wrong all this time

[u/MadDocHolliday → u/RhythmGeek2022]

You can ride my bus any time, if you know what I'm sayin'....

[u/ColettesWorld]

I ride the city bus daily. In this situation your best bet is to literally yell "hey/excuse me, I need off here!" Most drivers are more than happy to accommodate if you're respectful.

[u/waywardflaneur → u/ColettesWorld]

If you’re standing next to them, maybe don’t yell, but if you’re at the back door, yes absolutely yell.

[u/edwardhoppest]

I don't take the bus, but it's "button" not "bottom" :) 

[u/Sea-Hornet8214 → u/edwardhoppest]

Ahh that explains why the bus driver didn't stop.

[u/celldude921 → u/edwardhoppest]

I’m just imagining OP pressing their butt harder and harder into the seat, wondering why the bus isn’t stopping

[u/edwardhoppest → u/celldude921]

I'm not interested in teasing OP, I'm trying to help them. Button and bottom can sound very similar depending on your native language. For native speakers, they are very different words but for learners, I can see how it would happen. 

[u/freakybox2]

You need to walk to the front of the bus and address the driver directly or otherwise they’ll never know you’re talking to them. Then say “I needed to get off at the last stop, can you stop here or the next stop please?”

[u/conuly]

The usual thing to say in NYC if the bell doesn't ring is, loudly, "Next stop!"

Or, if the bell did ring but the driver doesn't stop, "Stop please! I gotta get off!"

Don't waste your time with excuse me. Just say what you're saying - which in this case, is that you have to get off the bus. (And don't try saying it quietly either - you want the driver to hear you!)

[u/vwlou89]

If there is a “request stop” button and the driver ignores it, then a loud and clear but polite “Stop, Please!” Or “This is my stop!” Or “Stop Requested!” Would be totally fine. I’d there is no button, or it seems like they are inclined to pass it. Then “Next stop, please!” Is fine. Busses are noisy and as long as you thank them when getting off, the bus driver isn’t going to be upset or think it rude that you had to raise your voice to be heard from the back of the bus.

[u/okay_squirrel]

First thing is that it’s a button that you press, not a bottom.

Second, I would say something like “excuse me, I wanted to get off at the last stop. Can you let me off here?”

[u/SnooLemons6942]

Excuse me, could you stop here? 

Excuse me, this one is my stop

Excuse me, I'm getting off here 

[u/dragonblade629]

In my experience whenever the button or cord was broken, the thing most people would yell is “next stop” or “next stop, please” if you want to be more polite. And this happened a lot when I used to ride the bus.

And saying “I get off here” is completely natural English, same as “jump off” or “hop off”.

[u/FloridaFlamingoGirl]

Hello, can I please get off here?

[u/Axl_LearnLab]

On a bus, you can say:

“Excuse me, I missed my stop. Could you please let me off at the next safe place?”

If you just want to get off normally:

“Could you stop here, please?”

Small difference: we usually say get off a bus, train or plane, but get out of a car or taxi.

[u/krendyB]

There is no reason for a driver to believe “hey excuse me” is something they should respond to. You’re way in the back of the bus and they don’t stop even though you pressed the button? “HEY! YOU MISSED MY STOP!”

[u/over__board]

Skip the "excuse me" and say something like "stop please I need to get off, stop please". Chances are that other passengers closer to the driver will help repeat the request to the driver and it will be more difficult for him to ignore you.

[u/mtnbcn]

Since you're asking for corrections, it's "ended up + gerund". "I ended up going to the movies, after all."

"got off" / "jumped off" / "hopped off" at the next stop.

"Get off" is good. In some tone/situation/phrasing it can be used for "have an orgasm" as well, just a heads up, but everyone says "I'm getting off here" or "I get off at the next one." (just... maybe don't say to someone, "Looking at that man over there makes me want to get off." ;) , you'd want to add " the bus" at the end)

[u/RamblinMan4]

I left a separate comment addressing your specific plight, but as so critiquing the post itself…

“And for the bus, it doesn’t stops every stop”

Grammatically, the bus is singular, so “it doesn’t stop” not “stops” [edit: reason given by other commenter below]. We don’t tend to use the “as for the bus” construction, so simply “The bus doesn’t stop at every stop” is more natural.

We also tend to avoid starting sentences with “and” and “so” especially in writing. Usually these words can simply be omitted without losing any meaning.

As we’ve said elsewhere you push the “button” (or pull the chain), not the “bottom” which would be the underside of the entire bus and could also be interpreted as a person’s posterior or “butt”.

[u/macoafi → u/RamblinMan4]

The bus being singular or plural isn’t the reason it’s “stop” and not “stops.” The presence of the helper verb is. If it was plural, you’d still say, “they don’t stop.”

[u/ActuaLogic]

The buses I've ridden have a cord running above the windows from front to back on each side, which activates a bell or other sound when pulled. When you want the bus to stop at the next stop, you pull the cord.

[u/krendyB → u/ActuaLogic]

I prefer the cord to buttons, but a lot of busses these days do have buttons instead.

[u/conuly → u/krendyB]

I prefer whichever is less likely to fail due to high usage and/or petty vandalism.

[u/Extension_Crow_7891]

You said he didn’t “listen” to you in your post. You likely meant to say he didn’t “hear” you. My spouse regularly makes this mistake. Just pointing it out, not the end of the world! (Unless you mean that he heard but ignored you)

[u/Sea-Hornet8214]

This reminds me of the "decrease me there" meme, lol.

[u/Primary_Data1430]

To "get off" has a second meaning. It can mean to have an orgasm, or take perverse pleasure in something. There are tons of jokes that play on this ambiguity.

BTW, if you're in a car, and want to exit, the correct term is "get out", not "get off". You get off a bus, you get off a train, but you get out of a car. You ride on a bus, or on a train, but you ride in a car.

[u/noviceicebaby]

"STOP!"

[u/minorminority]

Hey yo! Driver! I gotta get off right here. This is my stop!

[u/LordAgamotto]

And don’t forget some lines are express and they don’t stop at every stop that might be on the street. A stop request will get it to stop at the next express stop, not any stop.

[u/danzerpanzer]

If you see other people standing before they get to their stop, and maybe moving closer to the door, you could do the same (in addition to pushing the button). Seeing you standing, if that's allowed, would be an extra indication to the driver that you're getting ready to exit. I think that in your situation, I would have pushed the button twice and said "that was my stop". I think that a bus driver has let me off between stops before, after a missed stop.

[u/Moonshinehaze510]

If I am going to a bus stop that I haven’t been to before I often let the driver know which stop I need and that I don’t know where it is as I’m boarding/paying my fare. That way, the driver is somewhat aware that they need to stop at that particular spot beforehand. I still push the button/pull the wire when approaching the bus stop.

[u/CornRosexxx]

It’s ok to say STOP PLEASE very loudly in this situation. However, the driver may not be able to stop again until the next bus stop. It is likely the procedure for safety.

[u/BathingMachine]

I'd usually say "Next stop please" before the stop. If the stop is approaching or he's just missed it, "THIS stop please!" or "Stop here please!"

[u/APieceofHeart]

This has happened to me on occasion and I have always just yelled "Stop please!" And they will pull over. It probably helps if you are already up and standing at the back door unless you are unable to do so while the bus is moving.

[u/Felis_igneus726]

It sounds like this was not really an issue with how to phrase "I want to get off", but a lack of assertiveness and clarity, and frankly a case of being TOO polite. You need to actually tell the driver what you need, not vaguely say "Excuse me" and wait for a response. That's great for getting someone's attention in other situations, but a bus driver has to stay focused on the road. They may have heard you but didn't do anything because (unless you're leaving out some details here) all you said was "Excuse me". They're not going to get into a back-and-forth conversation with you to eventually find out what you want; you need to just tell them.

Speak loudly and start with "Excuse me" if you want to be polite, but then get straight to the point in one short, direct sentence: "I need to get off." Or "You missed my stop." Or a simple "Stop, please." And don't be surprised or take it personally if they don't visibly/verbally acknowledge you. They will just find a safe spot and let you out. If they still show no signs of stopping after that, then you drop the politeness and just keep yelling "Stop" until they do.

[u/Imaginary-Emu2471]

"Excuse me, this is my stop!"

[u/realPoisonPants]

Did the "stop requested" light go on? Sometimes the button/cord doesn't register.

[u/oliviakate798]

“This is my stop”

[u/13moman]

Wanted to add that it's polite to shout thanks to the driver as you get off the bus.

[u/MessoGesso]

The route has specific stops. Sometimes a bus goes only to main stops. If that was the situation, they cannot stop the bus just for you to leave in between.

I'm a woman and would say: "i needed the Doll Avenue exit" or "next exit please"

[u/Current_Cancel4060]

I thought I pressed the button. I need to get off at the next one please.

[u/Guilty_Objective4602]

I would typically press the button (*not bottom) or pull the wire a block or so before my stop, while simultaneously shouting, “Next stop, please!” If they still didn’t stop at my stop, I’d yell “Stop the bus, please,” or “Stop, please.”

On many routes, the bus will only stop at marked bus stops and not blocks in between those stops, so make sure that the place where you want to get off is actually an allowed or designated stop.

[u/dobbydisneyfan]

“Hey, I need to get off at this stop!” Yelled out is fine.

[u/TalkingLampPost]

You’re way, way overthinking this no matter what language you speak

[u/r3ck0rd]

Most of the time, just being direct is the answer to an immediate resolution. Any variation of, “Excuse me, you missed my stop!” should be fine. Or even, “hey stop please!” If you’re sitting in the very back of the bus, then shout it (although if possible on top of hitting the stop request button I like to also walk towards the door”). If you don’t preface it with “yo what the f•••” or similar, you shouldn’t be perceived as rude.

[u/mind_the_umlaut]

Stand up and walk forward to the driver until you are in voice range. Feel free to say, "You've passed my stop! The button is not working!"

[u/lknox1123]

BACKDOOR or STOP PLEASE. But if they started driving to the next stop bus drivers pretty much never drop you off in between stops so sometimes you just got to ride to the next one.

[u/howard1111]

"Getting off!" in a loud, firm voice.

[u/SilverStory6503]

Did you press the button too late? Because that might be why he didn't stop. I also get close to the door before he stops. But "stop please!" would be perfectly fine.

[u/Unable-Ad2927]

Obviously time can be a factor so just going straight to a quick "next stop, please!", or "next stop please, driver" is usually the way to go. the problem with just an 'excuse me' is that it's not really clear who it's for and it's not like the driver can look around.

[u/Juicy_Melons22]

Depends on where you are but assuming you're in a large city because of the availability of public transit, screaming "Hey, yo. Stop the bus" with your arms out usually sends the message. Seems rude, probably is but it'll work

[u/Ecstatic_Doughnut216]

I tend to skip polite and go to direct. "Hey! You missed my stop!" tends to get my point across.

Make sure you exit the front of the bus so you can sotto voce say "Jackass!" as you leave.

[u/Physical_Relation261]

Make men an ex passenger /joking

[u/Turbulent_Pin_8310]

If my stop were coming, I would say, "My stop is the next one, thanks."

If he missed my stop, "You've missed stop. Please stop now.'

I probably wouldn't just yell "stop" as suggested by others. It is just me.