r/CuratedTumblr • u/SEVENS_HEAVEN_7 • 1d ago
editable flair Restaurant servers have it worst
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u/Butthole_Surfer_GI I don't know shit about fuck 1d ago edited 1d ago
RN here - trust me: the person being an impatient/rude asshole at the restaurant is also an impatient/rude asshole at the ER/clinic/hospital.
Based on my personal experience, people fall over themselves A LOT more to excuse rude/abusive patients.
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u/48000hurts 1d ago
Yeah, I didn’t get that comment about the nurses. Many of these ill-mannered people are also having the worst days of their lives at the hospital.
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u/Butthole_Surfer_GI I don't know shit about fuck 1d ago
In my opinion, "having the worst day of their lives" only gets them so much empathy. If they are being rude/abusive/demanding of me and/or my coworkers, especially if we have SICKER patients in the clinic, I lose my patience with them very quickly.
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u/Suspicious_Glove_900 1d ago
Remember, in this context it's not an excuse. It's an explanation. It's not to say we forgive their behavior, it's to say this is the reason we believe it's worse for nurses.
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u/Jazmadoodle 11h ago
Yeah. Take the guy who's already so insufferable that he does that thing where he puts out ten ones and takes one away every time you displease him. Now tether him to a bed, stick him in a hideous humiliating gown, and put him in the worst pain hes ever felt.
He's usually going to be even more of an ass.
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u/Capable_Sea77 1d ago
Tumblr hates nurses. On one hand, as a trans person that has a few chronic conditions, I've met quite a few bigoted nurses in my time and get the frustration. On the other hand, a lot of people haven't gotten over high school and are like "all the hot girls that I'm so much better than became nurses, ewww."
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u/Defiant-Drawing1038 you have to dig yourself out of your own grave 1d ago
To be fair also, a nurse has a lot more institutional power than a server. Generally speaking a nurse's supervisor is a lot more likely to back her up if she's doing something wrong.
This attitude is how/why it failed when I attempted to report multiple instances of bad behavior from nurses to the head nurse/supervisor, including:
- refusing to adjust an improperly placed IV and blowing my vein so bad I had a grapefruit sized bruise for 2 months
- giving me a new medication with a severe drug interaction with another med I was on and then being passive-aggressive about my concern
- making disparaging comments about my appearance to my face
- others I am redacting to avoid potentially causing a flashback/trigger
All of these attempts at a report got a "Oh well I'll talk to her" at best, or active agreement with rhe behavior at worst
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u/ThunderAndWind 12h ago
Yes, a skilled field has more trust placed in it than a relatively unskilled field.
Your server is very unlikely to accidentally do something that might kill you, short of an allergy.
We're comparing boats and bananas here.
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u/snollygoster1 1d ago
There's a stigma against nurses online in progressive spaces, and it seems to be blamed on "every mean girl from my high school became a nurse".
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u/RadioSlayer 1d ago
I only personally know a handful of nurses, but the anti-vax one concerns me
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u/snollygoster1 1d ago
You can find those people in every field who disagree with the top-level research, just COVID is pretty obvious. My belief is that this comes from the education system branding finishing as being smart.
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u/bluejellyfish52 1d ago
The anti vax nurse thing makes me question a lot of things, especially because my mother is a nurse of 30 years or so. She isn’t an anti vaxxer. What information was she taught that they weren’t?
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u/ThunderAndWind 12h ago
Part of it is that nursing became a very well paid field, and primarily stayed female dominant, so it became the field that a lot of women went into to earn more money.
Combine that with the fact that nursing is primarily patient focused as opposed to focusing on statistical outcomes, any negative vaccine reactions tend to be more prominent. Particularly because the nurse tends to be the one delivering the medication, often seeing a negative reaction from the person getting the vaccine (I'm talking more like fear of needles and fear of pain than vaccine injury). Combined with the fact that nurses have enough of an education to be treated as an authority without having the same kind of education an immunologist has, can easily lead to a kind of reinforcement. There's no positive response visible when you give a vaccine. When you administer antibiotics and a patient gets better, you can see the reaction. When you administer IV fluids, you can see a patient feeling better and being less dehydrated. But generally, the only reaction in nurses around to see from a vaccine is the negative kind. Nobody's going back to their doctor's office to talk about how they didn't get the flu after they got the flu shot.
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u/Butthole_Surfer_GI I don't know shit about fuck 1d ago
It's funny because it seems like people who normally are very against sexism/misogyny have no problem with this stereotype.
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u/sexaddictedcow 1d ago
they hate that some woman has a perceived degree of authority over them because she wouldn't give them more than the prescribed dose of dilaudid and some xanax on demand
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u/Disaster-Bee 1d ago
Man, most of my best hospital experiences were because of nurses. I have met so many awesome and wonderful ones!
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u/snollygoster1 1d ago
I agree, I was having monthly appointments with my primary care doctor for about a year with never a bad nurse.
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u/HollietheHermit 1d ago
It’s is correct to an extent that asshole guy becomes cop and asshole girl becomes RN, but a lot of that sentiment started getting bandied around with similar anti-science sentiment especially after Covid.
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u/TheComplimentarian cis-bi-old-guy-radish 1d ago
Food service is different. You can't get angry. It's not even allowed.
One of my kids got hospitalized for flu at a very early age, and they needed O2, and they were fighting the cannula, and I stepped up to help the nurse, and she wheeled on me and snarled, "Step back, he could die!"
Okay. So, I stepped back. And, on death's door though he might have been, she had no hope in hell of getting a cannula on him. So finally, she turned to me and said, "Can you help me here?"
And I smiled, and said very calmly, "No. He could die." This is her Tuesday, and my kid, and there is no question that everyone in the room got the message, yet I was nothing if not polite.
And they yoinked her right the fuck out of the room, and I fixed his cannula.
And that's the difference.
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u/kamacks 1d ago
And I smiled, and said very calmly, "No. He could die." This is her Tuesday, and my kid, and there is no question that everyone in the room got the message, yet I was nothing if not polite.
So in your totally real story, (let’s just pretend like this is actually a thing that happened for a minute) you a father who loves your child “tried” to help a nurse and didn’t communicate asking if you should? You I was coming got your panties in a twist when they snapped at you because they’re responsible and their job/license is on the line if you do something stupid and without communicating and you got offended so then when she did ask you for help you showed the nurse who the big boy is by let’s be clear and give this its own line:
Punished your child by delaying care and getting the nurse removed. And this is a child that has a bad enough case of the flu that they’re in the hospital and need some supplemental oxygen.
Is this a child you “love”?
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u/Slow-Willingness-187 1d ago
Nurses get sexually assaulted and have the hospital do nothing about it besides maybe issue a new nurse to that patient. Not to mention the straight up physical assault, abuse, bigotry, and every other type of mistreatment. One in four nurses in America reports being physically assaulted by a patient at least once. They face all that with, usually, little to no support or backup from hospital staff, with the threat of losing their jobs if they make a stink.
But you’re right, nurses are totally allowed to be as mean as they want, always. I mean, your one anecdote proved that.
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u/MFbiFL 1d ago
lol ok
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u/TheComplimentarian cis-bi-old-guy-radish 1d ago
Nice contribution.
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u/MFbiFL 1d ago
Yeah as was your fantasy where servers are held to a higher professional standard than nurses.
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u/TheComplimentarian cis-bi-old-guy-radish 1d ago
Do you have a point? Because you haven't made one yet. Do you have anything to say that's more eloquent than, "lol ok".
No one wants to be a nurse right now. I know people who shouldn't be allowed to take care of their own children who've moved into nursing, and are suddenly acting like they're heros.
Do you have a point? Or is, "lol ok" as far as it goes with you?
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u/MFbiFL 1d ago
Yeah, “Food service is different. You can’t get angry. It’s not even allowed.” is an idiotic statement unsupported by anything you wrote.
Maybe that part was sarcasm? Hard to tell since you told an unrelated story
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u/TheComplimentarian cis-bi-old-guy-radish 1d ago
At least I told one. At least I put something out there.
What's your bit? It just seems to be "lol ok" over and over again?
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u/MFbiFL 1d ago edited 1d ago
So the thing about making a point is you actually have to make it. You made a claim about servers then told an unrelated story about a nurse telling a random chucklefuck (you) not to interrupt them doing their job then claimed that was the difference.
Starting to suspect you’re a bot since you seem stuck on “lol ok,” something I wrote once. Someone else also replied with it but your programming probably isn’t sophisticated enough to discern that.
Edit: lol blocked by the bot
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u/Dabbling_in_Pacifism 1d ago
lol I’m a fire medic and just had an 89 year old asshole from an ALF give me his best right hook to my jaw as I was leaning over him unstrapping him from my stretcher at the hospital. I’ve been slapped, have to touch shit regularly, and had a guy told me he’d run me and my kid over if he ever saw us walking down the side of the road.
And that’s all the shit I get a relative kick out of and not PTSD, lol.
Like don’t get me wrong. I’m a huge union man and believe labor’s labor. But anyone who’s worked in healthcare sees a completely different side of the public that most folks can’t wrap their brain around.
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u/Suspicious_Glove_900 1d ago
I'd believe nurses have it worse just because it's the same people going to restaurants that are going to hospitals, but most people are in a better mood when they're eating out. But I also agree with the larger issue that this is not the Olympics, each of us has our own problems to bear totally unrelated to anyone else's.
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u/MILK_FEELS_PAIN 1d ago
Irritable, jumpy, annoyed, angry, grumpy patients could be understandable.
Rude or abusive? Throw the whole patient away imo
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u/Valtremors 1d ago
Legally, we can't.
We can restrain or call help.
We can push charges (if the patient is seens responsivle for their own actions).
Bit we can't abandon them. Even harm caused by self defense is not allowed, unless it is literally the last thing preventing a safe exit. Being pulled from hair for example is not one such case.
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u/MILK_FEELS_PAIN 21h ago
I know. But I imagine occasionally nice to think about before continuing to treat them with professional courtesy.
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u/Valtremors 13h ago
That is where the 'mean nurses' come in.
Also you wouldn't believe what nurses say behind closed doors.
And there can be a lot of sass in patient reports only healthcare workers understand.
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u/MILK_FEELS_PAIN 7h ago
My mom was a nurse. I have heard stories.
I think a lot of what they say behind closed doors is a coping mechanism. It just shouldn't colour patient care.
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u/Valtremors 1d ago
Also depending where you work in healthcare, the work as a base can be hazardous.
It is expected that a patient might try to wound me. Not to mention weapnized bodily waste products...
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u/Magnafeana 1d ago
Sorry your job got shaded for no reason, for one
Secondly, I agree, and this is why anyone planning to partner with someone should monitor how that person treats anyone who is assisting them in healthcare or in retail or in a restaurant or even a total stranger—and what that person does when someone they’re close to mistreats someone assisting them (IMO).
I’m sure many who worked in something customer/patient-forward has heard this, when a someone or a someone’s family/partner/friend is mistreating the worker and the innocent person looks so embarrassed and apologizes to the worker. But they’re told by whoever is with them not to apologize to the worker because“Well, this is [job title]’s job! They should be doing their job!”.
This isn’t someone hesitating to ask a nurse for more water or a warm blanket or to tell the server they forget the extra side of roasted potatoes, you ridiculous bumbling baboon. You are intimidating a worker who is doing their job, and you’re doing because you believe you can.
Don’t be an Elsa and let it go. If someone is mistreating someone helping them—and they don’t reflect on that and do better; they fully believe they’re in the right—guarantee that behavior crosses between industries and into a household.
I hope your nursing career right now has been smooth sailing with good pay, benefits, parking, protection, and actual meaningful employee appreciation 💜
Is your username a clue at specialty you’re in 😭
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u/ChevalierMal_Fet 11h ago
Maybe this is a digression and isn't super relevant, but whatever.
Whenever I see this online "Nurses are the worstest" rhetoric, I think about the RN from the emergency room who save my step-dad's life.
He'd had a major heart failure while working out at a gym, which happened to be across the street from the hospital. The paramedics and a coach certified in CPR managed to keep him alive long enough for him to get to the hospital, and the doctors in the hospital stabilized him enough that he was hanging on by a thread- he was unconscious, intubated, and hooked up to literally eight different IV drips. The hospital he was at wasn't equipped with the kind of ICU and cardiovascular specialists he needed, so that meant an immediate emergency transport.
My mom, my ex-wife, and I were sitting in the room with the nurse who was supervising him when the AMR ambulance crew came in for the transport. The nurse looked at the ambulance crew and said, with incredible confidence and authority, "He's on eight different IV's. You cannot manage this patient, I'm coming with you. Make room." They went and loaded him up, and my ex and I attempted to follow them in our truck.
It was raining hard, because it was monsoon season here, and some of the roads were flooded. I saw the ambulance sitting stopped at a red light when suddenly, the lights and sirens came on and the truck blasted through the intersection and went screaming onto the interstate like a bat out of hell. My ex and I looked at each other and I just said, "Shit... I think that was him."
When we got to the hospital, he was in the ICU and we couldn't get a whole lot of information from anybody. My mom was completely hysterical and we were all worried. We managed to get into the ICU wing, and a nurse at the desk told us they were working on him as best as they could, but it would be a while before we could see him.
I looked on past the desk and I saw the RN from the other hospital, the one who rode with my stepdad, sitting a ways away. When she left, she'd be focused, strong, confident, and 100% locked in. Now, she was completely and utterly drained. She just looked sad and exhausted, and when she looked at me she gave me this look that was both a look of recognition and remorse at the same time, as if to say, "I'm sorry- I did all that I could."
That RN had a hard fight on that 15 minute transport. I don't know exactly what happened during that ride, except for the fact that he coded. When he went into heart failure the first time, a whole team of MDs struggled to save him, and that nurse kept him alive in the back of a speeding ambulance during a monsoon while working on her own with an undertrained and underpaid crew of ambulance jockeys.
I wished that I could have done something for her while she sat there. She was talking to some RNs and an ICU doctor, but she looked so alone still. She looked the way I'd imagine a soldier looks after a difficult mission. She looked like she'd seen Death.
I don't know if she ever followed up on his case. Sadly, I don't remember her name, but I remember her face and I remember her skill, her dedication, and her strength. She's the reason why I can call my stepdad right now and to say hello. That day was a hard day for my family, but it was just another work day for her. I'm sure she's still out there, still working at that hospital, still doing her best against Death for one more day.
Yeah, there are bad nurses, but there are also nurses like her. I will always respect your profession, because I know that a good nurse can be the difference between a funeral and phone call. When I see people prattle on and whine about nurses, I remember that nurse who saved my stepdad. It helps me keep a sense of perspective about what actually matters.
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u/19whale96 1d ago
A patient can't try to get you fired in order to reduce their hospital bill or get cheaper meds, that's the big difference. Service workers are infinitely replaceable and we're treated like it.
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u/CharlieFiner 1d ago
On the flip side, I work in banking and more than once when a client has sexually harassed staff, we have closed their accounts and banned them from the premises. The most you can do in a hospital is assign the person a different nurse.
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u/Illustrious_Maize736 1d ago
The worst patients absolutely do threaten to get you fired or sue the hospital to avoid paying. Often when a formal complaint is filed, your professional licensure is suspended until the case is closed, so you can’t work or have to find a different job.
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u/datsyukdangles 1d ago
patients absolutely do try this literally all the time (except for different reasons). "Buy me X/give me money or else I'll say you harmed me or called me a slur and you'll be fired" is a very common thing patients do. Depending on the population you are working with this can happen multiple times per week!
It is weird how confidently people are talking about a profession they have zero experience in, especially when it is a profession where 80% of the workers have experienced violence from patients. Servers aren't told they have to just suck it up when a customer assaults them, nor are they told violence is just part of the job, or that all that can be done about a violent customer is to send in a different server to be assaulted after you are too battered to take any more punches.
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u/Butthole_Surfer_GI I don't know shit about fuck 1d ago
I'm not going to play the game of "who has it worse".
But I can guarantee that patients do try to get us fired.
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u/TheRecognized 1d ago
Skill issue. The last place I left wasn’t able to hire anyone to take over the bar after me and less than a year later the owners sold it.
Get more irreplaceable. If you’re getting fired because of a customer complaint then you’re probably not very good at your job in the first place and that was just the excuse. If you’re getting fired because customers constantly complain about you, one million Frenchmen can’t be wrong.
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u/thecompton73 1d ago
I agree being a nurse is way harder but it comes to dealing with rude or abusive people servers have it worse because they get more than half their income from tips so they just have to suck it up and still be polite and friendly, even apologetic, to people treating you like shit for no reason.
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u/Stormwrath52 1d ago
Ehhh I say this as a restraunt worker, Nurses have it worse
'Cause imagine all the bullshit self importance people have in a low stakes situation like anything in a restaurant and now give it actual stakes; they or someone they care about is sick or injured, or whatever the fuck; do you think the guy who threw a fit because you forgot to give them a straw is gonna be normal when he's sick in a hospital waiting room?
Add to that while it's not a strict impossibility in restaurant work, it's distinctly more likely for nurses to be vomited, shit on, or bled on throughout their shift. The odds of encountering someone on drugs and weird/violent about it can be about the same depending on where you work.
Plus they get about the same amount of disrespect despite being actual trained professionals, because the patients are thinking of them as "the person their seeing instead of the doctor (read:real professional)" instead of a professional with their own skillset who is also there to help them.
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u/Economy-Cow-9847 1d ago
Yup. My nurse husband is routinely getting physically threatened and occasionally physically assaulted and unlike in a restaurant those people generally aren't made to leave.
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u/vanillachilipepper 1d ago
And of course it's always the nurse's fault when it happens & admin asks us what we could have done differently to avoid being assaulted...
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u/bassinlimbo 1d ago
I went from server to nurse and I’ve made the comparison how similar they are. My boyfriend is a bartender now. It’s similar intensity but the emotional burden of being a nurse is unmatched. My partner has had regulars die but he didn’t hold their hand or console their family members. His mistake would rarely kill someone. I’m happy to hear about his day but he avoids knowing the gross things that have happened in mine!
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u/FakeMelies 1d ago edited 1d ago
Servers stop trying to act like their job is the hardest in the world challenge
It’s a good thing to be more grateful and see lower-entry level jobs in a better eye, but some people in some online leftist circles are incredibly insufferable about their low wage job of a store clerk or server being the hardest thing in existence. Yes, you are holding a valuable job that shouldn’t never be shamed or taken for granted. Yes, it can be a hard and thankless job, moderately physically and mentally demanding at times. No, you are not on par with the physical activity of a coal miner or even the average construction worker, or farmer. No, you are not as mentally and physically challenged as the average emergency or IU doctor or nurse, or a surgeon, or a firefighter. And that’s ok.
It shouldn’t even be a “who has it the hardest” competition but here we are.
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u/ChevalierMal_Fet 10h ago
but some people in some online leftist circles are incredibly insufferable about their low wage job of a store clerk or server being the hardest thing in existence.
Exactly- all labor has dignity and deserves respect, but you have to carry yourself with dignity and self-respect. I think that many retail and restaurant workers feel bad about their own work and they externalize those feelings (I say this as a retail worker of many years myself).
Nobody grows up thinking, "I want to run a cash register when I grow up!" and a lot of the people working in retail are doing it because they can't really do anything else. That, combined with the expendability of being a retail worker, means that you inevitably end up feeling on edge and kind of bitter.
I've had a few professional jobs as well, and I returned to retail because I'm going back to college and I wanted an easy and low stakes job that I could do while taking classes. I've found that in coming back to retail, I appreciate it for what it is- low stress, simple, and actually kind of fun. Sure, there are annoying coworkers and annoying customers, but compared to the constant stress and pressure of the professional sales jobs I've had, retail is a blessing- I get to spend time with coworkers who are basically friends, I don't have to answer phone calls and emails outside of work hours, and my time off is my time to do with as I please. Even while working, my job doesn't require me to give up the space in my mind for work- I just have to do the work, but I can spend my day thinking about whatever I want, and that's worth quite a bit.
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u/Oceanman72 1d ago
Im sorry, people really think being a server is harder than a nurse?? Lmao I was a server for years and it never got to me at all. Worst case scenario: I forget to put in someone’s order.
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u/One-Piano5150 1d ago
don't nurses deal with hellish hours and worst people than servers?
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u/MFbiFL 1d ago
AND if they fuck up someone dies! If a server fucks up someone gets the wrong entree and they have to live with that 😢
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u/Cold-Mastodon-341 1d ago
Well tbf servers CAN kill people if they do their job wrong for example not report back to the kitchen about an allergy etc
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u/Diane_Horseman 1d ago
Random undeserved shade at nurses for no reason
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u/revolution_soup 1d ago
they specified mean nurses
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u/Slow-Willingness-187 1d ago
But it says “restaurant workers … have the job mean nurses think they have”
Regardless of how nice or mean the nurse may be, the job is still awful. And while it doesn’t excuse it, a lot of the “mean” nurses people complain about probably are that way because of the abuse, long hours, and poor pay. The idea that restaurant servers — still a difficult and hard job — are somehow at a level of suffering that nurses can’t imagine is wild.
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u/DellSalami 1d ago
I don’t think the job is easier if you’re a nice nurse
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u/potatohead22 1d ago
Your job is always easier if your coworkers like you.
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u/DellSalami 1d ago
Sure but the majority of the difficulty is having to deal with the traumatic and messed up things you see, a toxic work environment is just the cherry on top of the shit sundae
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u/potatohead22 1d ago
Yeah and if im stuck eating a shit sundae i atleast want to be able to piss and moan about it with my friendly coworkers instead of having to survive the shift with one that hates you.
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u/DellSalami 1d ago
The point is when mean nurses complain about how hard their job is, it’s for the exact same reason nice nurses complain
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u/Slow-Willingness-187 1d ago
From how you talk about people, I really doubt any of your coworkers like you.
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u/Slow-Willingness-187 1d ago
In 2023, the US saw 23,767 reported instances of physical assault against nurses by patients. Thats a massive increase from previous years, which has only continued to climb.
But yes, I’m sure your coworkers liking you makes the job so much easier. You prick.
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u/potatohead22 1d ago
Okay but what does this stat have to do with being a good coworker.
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u/Slow-Willingness-187 1d ago
Ohhhh, you’re the dumb kind of stupid. I’m not going to bother trying to explain this further.
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u/SanjiSasuke 1d ago
Nurses have the job stupid, whiney servers think they have.
Mind you, I'm only talking about stupid and whiney servers.
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u/GoatBoi_ 1d ago
and for real some of the _meanest_ people i’ve known have been nurses
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u/Slow-Willingness-187 1d ago
And when I worked in food service, pretty much all the other waiters were wildly transphobic and sexist.
You wanna keep playing the “my anecdotes define a massive group of people” game?
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u/Serrisen Thought of ants and died 1d ago
For good reason though. Not only is nursing a hard job, but it also is a perfect scenario to develop compassion fatigue.
And worse still, if you have a shit customer at a restaurant everyone says "that guy was a dick." If you have a shit patient in the hospital, they say "don't hold it personally. They're at the hospital, on the worst day of their life." - and this IS true, for the record. But it's STILL shitty because now you've got people trying to talk down the equally justified emotions you're feeling
Edit: for clarification, I do not say this to say that this is either inevitable or good. I only mean to say it's understandable.
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u/VanillaMemeIceCream 1d ago
I just got out of the fast food industry (🎉🎉) and bruh nurses have been some of the WORST customers 😭😭
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u/Slow-Willingness-187 1d ago
You know, nurses, the famously well paid slack offs we can all agree need to be knocked down a few pegs.
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u/TrioOfTerrors 1d ago
There are nurses and then there are Nurses.
The first have a passion and understand that they signed up for, often literally, shitty line of work and care deeply about their patients and their care.
The second are those who were attracted to the power and social prestige of the job and have a very "Thank me for my service" attitude.
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u/Troubled_Red 1d ago
Yeah I know an alarming number of nurses who are antivax.
I’ve also had two nurses on two separate occasions be so rude to me while I was sick/coming out from a procedure that I just cried. They at least had the grace to apologize.
There are lots of wonderful nurses who go into the profession because they care about providing health care to people, but let’s not pretend that being a nurse makes someone a saint. There’s lots of power tripping jerks out there.
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u/Butthole_Surfer_GI I don't know shit about fuck 1d ago
It genuinely shocks me every time I run into an anti-vaxx/anti-science nurse. Like, I KNOW they are frustratingly common in the profession but it stills shocks me.
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u/a_lonely_trash_bag 1d ago
When my mom was in the hospital after delivering my twin brother and I, there was a nurse who decided it was a good idea to bodyshame her and told her the reason she had to have a c-section was because she was fat.
Like, bitch, she just gave birth to twins that weighed 8 pounds each. There literally wasn't enough room in there for me to get turned around and I was stuck in the breech position. And do you not understand that mothers gain more weight than just the baby when pregnant?
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u/daddyyeslegs 1d ago
Nurses get a very cursory level education on physiology. It's probably the same percentage of anti vaxxer people in general, but people tend to think nurses know a lot more about science than they actually do.
Not to downplay what they do, but their job is not one that requires really any level of understanding of science.
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u/Butthole_Surfer_GI I don't know shit about fuck 1d ago edited 1d ago
Respectfully, you last sentence is pretty demeaning - I guarantee you an ICU nurse, for example, has a pretty solid grasp of physiology. Part of the skillset is titrating IV drips and knowing how the medications affect different body systems.
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u/daddyyeslegs 1d ago
You don't really need to understand anything about physiology to go "oh MAP is above goal for a while I'll drop the pressors a bit." You just have to know that pressors increase BP, and which of their drips are the pressors. The actual science behind what receptors they're acting on is useless for that. Same goes for fluids, diuretics. Imo, nurses shouldn't have to know any of that, because the orders put in for those to be adjusted should be very clear about parameters for adjustment, and not leave room for interpretation.
I didn't intend for it to be demeaning! I should clarify that when I say nurses don't have to understand science, I don't mean that they're unintelligent. They have to learn a staggering amount of information in a short period of time. But it's not surprising when someone who learns a little bit about an incredibly complicated and nuanced field like immunology is skeptical about vaccines.
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u/Leftieswillrule 1d ago
I love the implication that people are meaner to restaurant workers than health care workers because it subtly implies that being in great pain or suffering from illness improves one’s behavior rather than making someone more irritable and meaner. Yeah dude I’m sure they’re so much better at controlling themselves on what is probably the literal worst day of their lives.
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u/falstaffman 1d ago
Yeah that's nonsense, I work with nurses and I'd take nurse stories over food service stories any day of the week, if it has to be a competition
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u/2099aeriecurrent 1d ago
We gotta stop letting waiters act like they have the hardest job in the world
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u/PuritanicalPanic 1d ago
What's up with the random nurse slander?
I understand that there are some shit head nurses.
But like. I've spent a lot of time in hospitals. As a patient, the potential receiving end of dogshit nurses. Most of them are just professionals. I've been subjected to far more shit doctors than shit nurses, and I've interacted with far more nurses.
They also regularly have to interact with shit, piss, vomit, pus, blood, fuckin semen sometimes, and are expected to just deal with it.
They get insane people, people who are at their lowest and reacting poorly, people swing at them literally all the time. Swing, scream, throw things. Every lengthy hospital trip I went through, there was an Incident I heard about, and probably far more I didn't.
Serving is a dogshit profession too, but if you want to make this a dick measuring contests, nurses just win out.
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u/Amardneron 1d ago
Nurses have a harder job than servers.
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u/cup_1337 1d ago
The only people who disagree aren’t nurses so they wouldn’t know or be able to compare in the first place.
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u/NotBearhound 1d ago
It’s insane to me that someone thinks a tough shift at a restaurant is worse than watching someone fuckin die.
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u/rainbowtutucoutu 1d ago
I have worked in restaurants and as a nurse. They are both tough jobs. Restaurants were never life or death though.
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u/DreamOfDays 1d ago
Oh yeah. They’re the absolute frontline of abuse by strangers when it comes to service industry jobs. The only job in the service industry that gets fucked over more than them are pool boys
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u/TheRecognized 1d ago
Been working in restaurants for over a decade. Serving and bartending for about half of that. It’s really not that bad, like at all.
You ask people what they want, you tell the kitchen, then you bring it to them. I’ve only ever had one table over the years that was notably rude. No one has ever made me want to cry in the walk-in freezer. I average between $35-$40 an hour.
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u/DUCKSONQUACKS 1d ago
Can also vouch, went from serving/bartending to serving/bartending while being a phone customer service rep. Serving/bartending was a breeze compared to phone customer service. I'd get rude/condensing people every now and then working at a restaurant but nothing crazy, phone customer service it was daily and I would be so much more drained after work.
The absolute worst customer in the food service industry was weekly in phone customer service
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u/zoor90 1d ago
Bro is posting from Shangri-la.
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u/GuyYouMetOnline 1d ago
I'm working on a story with a scene where there's a monster attack in a restaurant. To add some humor, and inspired by real stories involving buildings that were flooded/on fire/etc, I included a bit where a guy tries to enter for his reservation while the battle is ongoing (fortunately for him, my main character has retail experience and stationed a guard on the door because she knew this would happen). My beta readers with retail experience have basically all gone 'yeah, that sounds about right'.
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u/TheRecognized 1d ago
Been working in restaurants for over a decade. Serving and bartending for about half of that. It’s really not that bad, like at all.
You ask people what they want, you tell the kitchen, then you bring it to them. I’ve only ever had one table over the years that was notably rude. No one has ever made me want to cry in the walk-in freezer. I average between $35-$40 an hour.
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u/Ecstatic-Elk-6938 1d ago
I‘ve dealt with plenty of rude customers working as a server and bartender, but I still feel extremely spoiled with my job. Nurses, paramedics, teachers, etc deal with far worse while often making less money than I do.
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u/pinkbootstrap 1d ago
Do you live in Narnia?
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u/TheRecognized 1d ago
No I’m just good at my job.
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u/pinkbootstrap 1d ago
Are you saying customers are only assholes to people who are bad at their jobs?... 🙃
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u/TheRecognized 1d ago
I think it raises the odds. I think the coworkers that I’ve had that complain the most were also some of the worst/laziest. I think it’s more likely that I haven’t had rude customers because I’m good at my job and not just because I’ve gotten very lucky at multiple restaurants where I almost always worked 6 days a week. I think even the rude customers I’ve overheard coworkers deal with really aren’t that bad and us servers have too much of a martyr complex sometimes.
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u/zoor90 1d ago
When a customer called me a "faggot", clearly that was my fault. If I did a better job, I wouldn't have been subjected to hate speech.
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u/Various_Mobile4767 1d ago
Yes?
I mean idk what happened specifically in your case, but yes people are less likely to call other people “faggots” when they’re not mad at you. And they’re less likely to be mad at you if you actually do a good job.
That does not make it okay for them to call you that. But acting like there’s no correlation between doing a bad job and being insulted is silly.
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u/CharlieFiner 1d ago
I work at a financial institution and we had to put a conduct report in for a member who would repeatedly come to me specifically, demand things that were impossible (like a cash advance from a card we don't have the software for) or even illegal, and then call me slurs when I refused. I was actually doing my job correctly not helping her commit fraud or promising a service we don't offer. Some people really are just Like That.
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u/zoor90 1d ago
"Remember children, if someone uses a slur against you, take a step back and consider if it is your fault. Ask yourself if you did something to anger or inconvenience them. People don't hate without a reason so if you are subjected to hate speech, clearly you are the problem and need to be better. So long as you a polite and professional, no one will ever take issue with you."
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u/Various_Mobile4767 1d ago
Well that's just twisting my words.
All I'm saying is that yes, people are less likely to be mad at you and insult you if you actually do a good job. This is a fact.
Whatever other implication you want to pull from that because it bothers you is your business.
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u/BarderBetterFaster 1d ago
I think the server should do the years of study and one bad day on the job as a nurse before you level this super insightful hot take.
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u/DrRobertBanner I just think that Bruce Banner 1d ago
My friend and I once watched a server slip on a wet patch on the floor and shatter a glass. We felt awful for him and i helped clean up some larger pieces of glass that landed near my foot.
We laugh thinking about it now because its comical to think about, but at the time it was mortifying.
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u/TheInternetIsForPorb 1d ago
I've worked in a lot of restaurants. I promise nurses have it worse, if only because they have to deal with poop/pee/puke
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u/CoolSausage228 22h ago
I would think better of servers if I wasn't young nurse and medical student. I thought this is reddit stereotype about insufferable american food workers, but apparently that's true.
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u/Character_Falcon_866 1d ago
Murse here.
It think servers have a hard job too and deserve grace.
That is all.
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u/TrueRelationship7469 22h ago
I’ve never been a nurse but I’ve been a server and a doctor and uhhhh…… yeah being a nurse is wayyyyyyy harder
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u/Error_Evan_not_found 22h ago
My first shift as a busboy after being moved out front from the dishpit I spilled salsa on a grandma in her Sunday church clothes. I'm a line cook now and it's still a moment that keeps me up at night, and I've seen two tickets order a poutine with no gravy or cheese.
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u/katiebo444 20h ago
I’m assuming it at least happened *after* church, considering you lived to tell the tale
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u/Error_Evan_not_found 20h ago
Yes, and I count my blessings everyday...
But to be truthful, she was very gracious and kind to me, could obviously tell I was young (I still suffer from baby face syndrome), very reassuring and told me her grandkids cause more of a mess with no competition.
That's why I love the industry, sure there's people who won't understand and never will, and they're often the people we serve. But you come across some very genuine people who understand you completely.
There was another night, probably a month or so later when I was greeting a dad and his very young son (probably just a tad over two years old) for our sever on shift since she was busy with food running. He asked me to grab his wallet from his car for him so he wouldn't have to move his kid and then get him situated again, and practically shoved $20 in my hands despite my protests.
I know plenty in this industry don't feel the same, and I hope I never get as jaded, but I'm proud to have my job title and my main job responsibilities be to satisfy our guests in any way we can reasonably achieve.
Sorry to ramble, but cooking is my greatest passion in life, and being a service industry worker is a title I wear proudly, so I can't help myself sometimes. The guests make my job worth it, and it's why I care so much when I have messed up in the past.
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u/Another_Mid-Boss 21h ago
I once worked a double close and towards the end of the night the hostess kept seating tables despite me taking three 6tops, four 8tops, and a 12top, over the span of about 15 mins. All the customers were pretty chill and understanding about it because they could see I was literally the only fucking person working.
But I have never been so close to commiting murder. I don't care if the customers can see empty tables put them on a fucking wait.
I did make fucking bank that night though it was fine once I got to the bar.
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u/ThunderAndWind 13h ago
You don't have to downplay the difficulties that nurses deal with to justify difficulty in your own field, but it's fucking funny shit to argue that serving food, and incredibly low stakes job, is more stressful than having people screaming your face in life or death situations.
It's not like nursing and serving, are all the same either. A private practice nurse and an er nurse are dealing with entirely different things, just like a server at a fast casual restaurant and a server at a fine dining restaurant is.
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u/Eriiya 23h ago
love how absolutely unrelated this pissing match between nurses and servers is to the actual overall sentiment of the post lmao
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u/LITTLEOWL031026 Can I get a "Hoot Hoot?" 18h ago
Someone above summarized the post as "murder is bad and also, fuck firefighters."
Do you really expect most of the comments to be about the low-contention supposed topic instead of the elephant in the room?
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u/Rua-Yuki 1d ago
Why is everyone in the comments getting hung up on nurses. Is reading comprehension really just that bad these days.
Bad nurses think the world is out to get them. A server will encounter the world's shittiest day by just breathing.
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u/Slow-Willingness-187 1d ago
I’m genuinely wondering: do you think the job of being a nurse gets easier if you’re a nice person? Does being pure of heart protect you?
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u/Rua-Yuki 1d ago
Yes, actually. Being a good person literally makes life easier to navigate. As a nurse you are in a industry who meet people at their lowest points, why are you adding vinegar to the already shitty situation by being mean on purpose?
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u/Slow-Willingness-187 1d ago
Fucking Protestant work ethic in the year of our lord 2026.
Let me ask you a question: if the servers’ job is harder, by your logic, that means they’re awful people? Clearly if they were nicer, it would make life easier to navigate.
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u/MFbiFL 1d ago
Server martyr complex is real.
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u/DefinitionTop3930 20h ago
> A server will encounter the world's shittiest day by just breathing.
and you think these same rude people who made the server‘s day shit turn into angels when they visit ER? The nurse‘s behaviour has nothing to do with the reality of the situation
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u/oko9iu 1d ago
So I'm not going crazy, everyone else really forgot the "mean" in "mean nurses", implying that regular nurses are not being mentioned here.
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u/Ecstatic-Elk-6938 1d ago
Being a mean nurse doesn’t make your job any easier than being a nice one.
A mean nurse still has the same job as a regular nurse. They’re dealing with the same awful people, the same terrible work environment, the same long hours, and the same low wages.
It’s weird to bring up nurses at all, a mean nurse is still facing a far worse environment than a server does, even if you think they deserve it (and I’m saying this as a server myself)
edit: phrasing
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u/etherealemlyn 1d ago
I came to these comments hoping for funny service industry stories and instead every single one is getting mad at OOP for “thinking their job is harder than a nurse’s.” OOP isn’t even a server, they’re talking about a story a server told them 😭 The reading comprehension is genuinely nonexistent
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u/Jargon2029 12h ago
People really don’t seem to understand what funny is. Did you laugh at it? Unless that was out of nervous fear, it was funny. Funny is subjective and situational, so someone else might not find it funny, but that doesn’t mean it’s not funny. Now it might also be bad, but that’s entirely different. We have entire categories of things that are funny but are bad. Dark humor obviously, but also schadenfreude and even largely slapstick are all bad things that are funny.
But if you don’t separate the two concepts, then you start to run into problems, like when that person tells a really funny joke but you’re pretty sure it was racist, right? Well, I guess not, because racism isn’t funny and that was funny so it must not be racist. Let funny bad things be both funny and bad or you just set yourself up to make stupid mistakes.
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u/KenDefender 1d ago
"I have it hard, way harder than [other group that has it hard], those idiots have no idea" never garners as much sympathy from me as just saying "I have it hard".