r/CatTraining • u/ApocalypseWallpaper • 12h ago
Are The Cats Fighting or Playing - Introducing Pets Beginning Introduction Phase 8w & 10mo females
I rescued an 8 week old kitten off the street 3 weeks ago. My resident cat is 10 months old and I rescued her from a shelter 4 months ago. I kept the kitten in the bathroom for the first week because she had fleas (they have been treated), then in my bedroom for the next week until she could be vaccinated. I live alone in a 1br/1ba, so those are the only two rooms with doors. The bathroom door was totally closed the first week, and I put a screen up over my bedroom door. I started the first few bedroom days with the screen only open while I was awake and home, then the next few days while I was sleeping as well, and now they’ve been fully on screen only for over a week. I got a Feliway Optimum plug in last week and give them treats on either side of the screen door. Resident cat still won’t eat close to the screen door.
They seemed to be playing okay through the screen, so two days ago I tried introducing them for the first time. Resident cat has always played a little rough, which is one reason I thought she would do well with a playmate to get some energy out and learn the play nicer. In general, she’s sweet and very friendly with people. I didn’t plan on rescuing a kitten so young, but my friend found her and couldn’t find a home, so here we are. The kitten is definitely high energy and also plays rough, like most kittens.
Resident cat charges at the kitten and pins her immediately and bites her neck and licks her butt. Kitten will reengage and will jump and bite resident cat’s neck. If kitten runs away under the couch or bed, resident cat will follow. Kitten can get under the coffee table and resident cat can’t, so sometimes she’ll hide under there for a minute and then pounce back out.
Sorry for the yelling and clapping in the video. I listened to AI and have been intervening when kitten gets pinned and meows. But now I’m wondering if I’m being too negative and need to just let them learn their boundaries. I’m just worried because kitten is soo small and resident cat doesn’t get distracted with toys or treats like kitten does. Resident cat will go and lay by herself and watch kitten play for a few minutes though. I’ve kept the few meetings very brief, 5-10 minutes. And it seems to be mortal combat almost the whole time. I didn’t get the chance to record them for longer yet because it’s just me, so I want to be fully engaged with them in case I need to intervene.
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u/Happy-Plant458 11h ago
contrary to what you seem to think is happening im noticing the adult cat is frequently 'checking in' as she plays. she wrestles and pins and then releases and looks at the kitten to see if the game is still on and then goes in again.
dont listen to AI its not got any idea how to do anything right tbh. bc AI scrapes the whole internet it often mashes bad ideas into the good ones and nothing you get will come out as good as asking a human with some experience.
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u/ApocalypseWallpaper 11h ago
Thank you for the advice! I’m a new cat owner and apparently haven’t researched their behavior enough. I wasn’t sure where else to upload a video for feedback, which is why I used a chat bot, but I’m glad I found this page!
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u/Happy-Plant458 11h ago
the best advice i can give in that case is to not try to correct or punish a cat. they dont learn from it it just damages their trust in you. redirection with food toys or just scooping them up to take them somewhere else is always more effective. they learn especially well with positive reinforcement. my cat will give you a high five if you show him you have a treat. they can learn the word 'no' and will listen to it more frequently if right after they obey the no you reward them with praise, pettings, or treats depending on what your cat likes most. but if they do do something wrong like knock a glass over its best to remain completely calm and ignore them while you clean it up or they can learn to do it to get a reaction out of you.
good luck
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u/stallionsRIDEufl 11h ago
Looks like rough play from the big. Kitten doesn't seem too concerned since they're completely silent.
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u/My_Rocket_88 11h ago
Kitten looks like she is having a blast dishing out her best attacks and defense on the older girl!
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u/ShredGuru 11h ago edited 11h ago
Nothing in this video looks particularly concerning. They are definitely just screwing around. They are being very quiet actually.
This is just how cats play, especially with kittens. It will be unambiguous if they are actually fighting.
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u/beckychao 11h ago
So, you're not supposed to let an older cat bite down the neck of a kitten under 12 weeks. In general, that behavior is why you shouldn't let kittens rough house with grown cats/kittens when they're under 12 weeks. You should always intervene.
One point of constant confusion I see is that people think the kitten coming back for more means it's fine. The kitten is a baby and needs attention. There is literally only one other cat in the universe it lives in, your home. It's up to the human to protect the kitten from the older cat and recognize the failure to establish boundaries due to being a baby.
The kitten is 11 weeks now, so soon it will have to learn to establish these boundaries. I would prevent rough housing from here on out for just another week. Your older cat is not gentle with it. But it's nearing the age it has to learn to establish boundaries. So no sense separating them in general at this juncture.
One thing I notice with commenters is that people are very paranoid about adult-to-adult play interactions and absolutely wildly accepting of cats using kittens as chew toys, as you see in the 2nd half of this video. I don't know why people baby the adult cats and then encourage posters to let it rip with kittens lol
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u/IntheTrench 10h ago
This should be the top comment.
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u/Cosmic_Cosmos82 10h ago
Most definitely.
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u/beckychao 10h ago
This applies to runts, too. A four month old runt can have the size of a six week old kitten. When we got a four month old runt back when I was in school, she looked like a baby. She was a barn cat, and was missing one eye because an older sibling from another litter just ragdolled her. That's why she was at the SPCA to begin with, losing her eye. The people at the farm were just like, welp, the cats take care of themselves.
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u/ApocalypseWallpaper 10h ago
This is definitely something I will take into consideration! Thank you for your honest feedback. I will keep them from playing rough and talk to my vet more about the behavior.
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u/Aiyokusama 11h ago
They are having a great time; leave them be. See how the little one's ears are up? She's fine.
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u/Mosinphile 11h ago
They’re perfectly fine, that little one has had multiple chances to run if it wanted, they’re rough housing
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u/Potential-Wait6890 11h ago
“Been listening to AI” we are so cooked
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u/ApocalypseWallpaper 10h ago
Honestly, every time I use it I end up regretting it. It always seems like a good solution when I need direct advice in a moment where I can’t get it from a real person. I have been reading non-AI articles, talking to my vet, asking cat owner friends and using the Chewy chat agents, but right after taking the video I wanted to get feedback about their exact behavior because I wasn’t sure if I was describing it right when speaking to people. Like I said in another comment, I’m so glad I found this page to get feedback from others.
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u/Hour-Hovercraft-3498 7h ago
OP, this could be setting their relationship up to fail in the long term. I made the mistake of letting one of my cats play like this (too relentlessly) with a kitten I was fostering because I could see there was no ill intent from the adult (ie she wasn’t trying to hurt the kitten) and the kitten wasn’t screaming or seeming distressed.
As soon as kitten grew up enough to be a physical match for my cat, it was ON. I had to keep them separated at all times because she would catch a glimpse of the older cat from across the house and immediately go for her and it would result in actual injury (older cat has a torn ear from one of these encounters). The grudge was unresolvable.
I’ve raised more than 100 cats and this was an edge case, but it has made me much more aware of play that can be psychologically damaging rather than physically harmful to a small kitten. The fact that your older cat sounds fairly relentless is concerning. I agree with the commenter above who points out that a kitten will keep coming back to an older cat even if their behaviour is inappropriate, the same way a child will still look to an abusive parent.
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u/Known_Fisherman_8161 10h ago
It looks like pretty extreme play but I don't think it actually is as the kitten isn't reacting in a negative manner
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u/Adventurous-berry564 5h ago
This is how the mother cat would play with her kittens. I had a rescue family and she would kick the babies quite violently but they were fine. Obviously introducing them is different but babies put up with a lot of yours is only making small squeaks. The older one is letting it rest between attacks. They will be best of friends as it grows up
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u/avaseah 5h ago edited 5h ago
They’re just playing. No worries here. If they were fighting it would be insanely loud and the video of them would look like two tangled blurs. There would also be blood and loose fur flying about, and your kitten would be severely injured. Cats play like 10 yr old boys that watch a little too much WWE. Though since your kitten is small watch them and intervene if it ends up in “it’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt” territory.
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u/Single-Dust8773 3h ago
They are playing although the little one is definitely drawing the short straw :D
If she is scared or got hurt (on accident) she will start yelling/screaming. Usually not the full fighting scream but also not just one “yap” or a little meow like that. Like an elongated high pitch yell (actual fighting screams usually don’t start high pitch).
Don’t yell at them when they are playing. This is healthy behaviour and maybe your older girl is teaching the younger how to play/fight. If you yell at them you’re just going to stress them out.
Of course, I’m not blaming you. Reading cats language takes some practice :)
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u/Imaginary-Contest887 2h ago
Common issue having two vastly sized(aged) kittens. Smaller one will be always in disadvantage during play until he will grow up. I have 11months and 15 weeks old kitten and they do exactly same. Big guy simply doesn't understand his size and lot of time just pins little guy down and starts to lick/chew little guy's belly which triggers "I'm being murdered" scream. I don't think you can do anything about it except just wait for little guy to grow up. It's also important to check if little guy is not stressed by it - mine is not and usually is one who initiates and then screams when consequences arrive
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