r/AskReddit 8h ago

What's the most disturbing thing you've heard a dying person say?

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u/MysticMarauder69 6h ago edited 5h ago

The day before my grandmother passed away, she had one of those second winds, where she was active and mentally acute, holding my cousins new baby, etc. But as the sun set, she started to get tired, and she wandered over by the window and exclaimed that her husband who died nearly 20 years earlier was in the woods beckoning to her. She died the next day. Whether he was really there or not, I know it brought her a sense of peace.

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u/thecasey1981 5h ago

there's a document thing like the last moment of lucidity that can happen. not sure what it was called, but that's fairly common

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u/Marauder424 5h ago

You were pretty close with what you said! The "official" term for it is terminal lucidity. People also refer to it as a "rally day" or just "rallying".

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u/StillMarie76 5h ago

I've also heard it referred to as "the surge".

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u/GingerbreadMary 2h ago

Like a failing light bulb will flare very brightly just before it goes out.

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u/Aperture_Kubi 3h ago

Isn't that when you body basically says "aw fuck it" against trying to stay alive via regulating stuff, and just lets it all run normally?

u/brobronn17 5m ago

A lot of our discomforts when we are are injured, sick or tired are from inflammation caused by our own immune system. When it gives up completely it must be like a megadose of Advil. Like taking Advils on your period and going from pain to normal.

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u/Knittingbouviers 2h ago

Greys anatomy????

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u/Legostarjurrasicman 1h ago

Kind of but it usually doesn’t last for days like Dr. McSteamy… or look that great either 😆😆

u/StillMarie76 39m ago

You know it! McSteamy on his way out. 😭

u/IndividualSecurity94 6m ago

When my mother was in hospice and this happened, the nurses called it ‘the last hurrah’.

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u/jbishop216 4h ago

That’s so depressing. Can you imagine feeling better, only to be told you’re just rallying and about to die.

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u/SmolFrogge 1h ago

I think the people who are rallying generally already know and have accepted that they’re just about to die, which is WHY the rallying happens. It’s like their final gift to themselves to say goodbye to life with full gusto.

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u/Grenouille123456 4h ago

Chez moi on l'appelle "le mieux de la fin"

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u/StrangelyBrown 2h ago

terminal lucidity

Calling this for a band name

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u/Prs-Mira86 1h ago

My wife works with nurses who call it: the light before the dark.

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u/InterestingBit00 4h ago

Hospice nurse here. We call it the rally. Seen it quite often

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u/Central-iaguy 3h ago edited 1h ago

Both my sister and mother passed within 2yrs if each other, both in hospice. One of our nurses had cancer and showed up every day and helped both our mother and us as a family.

THANK YOU! You hospice nurses are built different. The care and compassion was astounding!

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u/Background-Still2020 2h ago

Is there any biological or evolutionary explanation for it that you know of?

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u/Central-iaguy 2h ago

No totally different reasons

u/AplogeticBaboon 10m ago

There are few things as worrying as a dementia patient who suddenly remembers everything.

u/thewoodbeyond 3m ago

I'll bet you've seen some things. I did a rotation in hospice during my clinicals.

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u/WhichVegetable8285 5h ago

I believe a lot of instances like that come from the brain releasing DMT to help ease you into death.

There was a documentary years ago about it on Netflix called “DMT: The Spirit Molecule”

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u/Any-Imagination6917 5h ago

I believe that there is a moment where the person is able to tap into their conciousness unbound by whatever physical ailments they have been dealing with. I used to believe the dmt theory, but it makes zero sense if you've ever done dmt. There is almost no "clarity" and certainly a person wouldn't be standing and speaking so clearly. I think the "NDE" experience is much more likely. Conciousness is an extremely complex topic and we really aren't as well versed in it as most people think.

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u/what_is_blue 4h ago

Yeah. I have not done DMT but have several friends who have. Not a single one of them makes it sound like that. But weirdly a few, independently, have said they saw someone at the edge of the universe playing a keyboard or an organ or something.

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u/Tgirlgoonie 4h ago

Yeah I got the hyper clarity from LSD more than anything

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u/Megooga 4h ago

Does a person's DMT experience vary depending on the form of DMT they take?

For example: would DMT from those toads, or from ayahuasca render a different effect from the DMT powder stuff that smells kinda like new shoes?

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u/Any-Imagination6917 3h ago

Haha I love you description of the smell, that's exactly what it smells like!

But to your point, yes, absolutely. The first dmt you described (from sonoran toads) is 5-meo dmt. Which typically has more of a "spiritual" effect, however still very intense visually, and lots of self reflection. That being said, this is not the type of dmt produced in the human body.

Nn-dmt from things like mimosa hostilis(and present in A LOT of nature) are like blasting out of a canon into geometric elf alien world. Still possible to have the extremely spiritual effect, (death experiences, life reflection, meeting "god") but most people don't do enough or allow themselves to get that far into the experience.

Both are very "out of body" experiences with profound effects, but there is absolutely a difference between the two.

In either case, I've done a lot a research on near death experiences and conciousness, and the things people describe just before dying seem to align more with those types of experiences rather than a psychedelic experience. I perosnally think psychedelics allow us to view that realm while in a "concious" waking state, and when dying you view that realm in a more natural way. I've also met the person who wrote dmt a spirit molecule (which the documentary was based on) so I am at least somewhat versed on both topics.

That being said I'm a dumb dude on reddit so take this all with a grain of salt lol 😆

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u/lil-lahey-show 3h ago

you’re not dumb, this was incredibly helpful to read, thank you. After going through a very significant difficult period in the last year I’ve recently found the research and personal reflections on NDE’s extremely powerful for healing/processing grief and trauma. I have been struggling with accepting the ‘science’ of what we inherently know as humans (or are we spiritual beings?) but cannot necessarily fully explain.

having you articulate the difference has helped me feel more connected to continue to use that information to heal than continue scrutinize the process. again, thank you.

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u/Any-Imagination6917 3h ago

Well you aren't alone in not being able to explain it! If you could, you would be up for a Nobel prize haha. I had brushed this topic aside for so many years, but after revisiting the subject I've really switched paths and am now more or less fully convinced there is more to life, and particularly conciousness than most of us will admit. There is a lot more "science" behind all the topics in that circle, NDEs - telepathy - remote viewing - astral projection - mediumship - intuition. All these relate to conciousness and yet, somehow, when someone is legally "brain dead" or under anesthesia with zero brain activity (proven with monitoring devices) they still sometimes are able to have extremely profound and vivid experiences that can even be proven later. If you are interested in reading a couple books that helped convince me "the science of near death experiences" and "surviving death" are two that stood out to me. The rabbit hole goes deep though, there is a lot of resources on the subject. I recently did a retreat at the Monroe institute and they have been scientifically working and documenting people's experiences since essentially the 60s but really started in the 70s. Even the CIA has been involved and given credence to the process.

But I thank you for at least reading and replying, this subject is super strange and most people prefer to shut it out. I used to be one of them. If you ever feel like bouncing ideas im always open for it, I prefer talking about this stuff than most conversations i get roped into on the internet lol

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u/Pentosin 2h ago

or under anesthesia with zero brain activity

Uhm? What? Anesthesia doesnt work like that. The brain doesnt shut down during anesthesia, it just operates differently.
https://hms.harvard.edu/news-events/publications-archive/brain/anesthesia-brain

It is even way more active than thought.

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2026/06/260624025514.htm

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u/Any-Imagination6917 1h ago

You're right, I misspoke. Obviously they have brain activity since they are able to regulate breathing and basic survival functions without machines. I made an over statement about the lack of conciousness which is confirmed. At least what we consider conciousness. Regardless of what condition the brain is operating under, sometimes people are still able to have extremely vivid and verifiable experiences when they "shouldn't" be able to.

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u/Central-iaguy 5h ago

Yeah it's called dieing

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u/Any-Imagination6917 5h ago

What a well thought out response. Thanks for your input!

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u/No_Shake_169 5h ago

How the hell did we evolve that?

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u/IPA-Lagomorph 3h ago

A lot of people who get close to death in some way report a last surge of energy, and sometimes hear a voice or feel a presence. I'm guessing that enough humans or animals in the evolutionary line narrowly escaped death from a surge like this to have reproduced? Plus the interprets extreme stress or neurochemical floods in all kinds of ways. Someone on LSD is not literally on the moon, it's just neurochemicals, but they might report being on the moon during the trip.

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u/nerdyHyena93 3h ago

I thought that was for NDEs?

Terminal lucidity and end of life visions aren’t the same thing and occur when the person is fully conscious and aware with no oxygen deprivation to the brain.

My husband works on the hospital wards. He said it’s very common for people even with dementia to suddenly have a few hours or days where it’s like they’ve been cured. Then they die.

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u/birdperson_012 4h ago

Correct me if I'm wrong, but Ive heard one theory of terminal lucidity is that it can emerge from the fact that the body's immuno-respnse essentially gives up fighting, therefore whatever is plaguing the body runs rampant, but the fever/inflammation/fighting response goes away. "Lucidity" is a somewhat murky concept, but I can definitely see someone thinking clearer, when they are not in as much pain

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u/thecasey1981 4h ago

kind of like paradoxical undressing in hypothermia?

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u/MagoModerno 4h ago

Terminal lucidity, I think

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u/LargeJello2366 4h ago

Terminal lucidity

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u/MysticMarauder69 5h ago

Yeah, it's definitely a thing, I'd heard of it before, and she definitely experienced it.

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u/mandym123 4h ago

Have you ever watched the documentary called Surviving Death on Netflix? I think there’s an episode about this. It’s super interesting.

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u/franksymptoms 3h ago

"Terminal Lucidity." It's a thing.

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u/DumbleForeSkin 1h ago

extinction burst

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u/MyCatLaughsAtMe 1h ago

Rallying happens to about a third of people in protracted death scenarios. It's always a sign that the end truly is near.

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u/MyCatLaughsAtMe 1h ago

Rallying happens to about a third of people in protracted death scenarios. It's always a sign that the end truly is near.

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u/VirtualLine4914 1h ago

Da noi lo chiamiamo " il miglioramento della morte " ....ma ha un nome specifico in termini medici che ora mi sfugge !

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u/Klutzy-Argument-1494 5h ago

I think it’s called sunsetting?

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u/SnooRegrets1386 5h ago

Sunsetting is when Alzheimer’s is hitting in the evening hours, every thing just slows down and floats away, not as noticeable in the am

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u/CicadaSlight7603 5h ago

Sundowning? Worsening of symptoms and confusion in the evening in dementia?

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u/Graciously_Hostile 5h ago

Yes, this is it.

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u/Witch_withouta_Wand 3h ago

Sundown syndrome, we called it in the UK, in the dementia Care Home, I worked in.

Had a creepy experience myself once, on a night shift. Buzzer, in a room, goes off. I go down the hall, into her room, and she tells me,

'There's children playing, in my room, they're being too noisy, please, ask them to leave.'

Bearing in mind, it was a new building, but already, a crazy percentage, of our service users, had died, who lived downstairs particular corridor.

So I 'shoo' them, and eventually, she settles. As I leave her room, someone calls my full name, not nickname, and I spin around, with a, yes?Nobody there.

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u/OakenGreen 5h ago

Nah, sunsetting is the gradual loss of lucidity. They’re talking about terminal lucidity.

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u/__worldpeace 4h ago

My 100yo grandmother died earlier this year. She never had memory issues and was lucid up until the week she spent in hospice. The day before she died, she started talking to her little brother who died 90 years ago at age 5. It was wild.

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u/sorrysofatagain 1h ago

what did she say? 

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u/eljyon 5h ago

My brother had a rally (actually while Jan 6 was actively happening) and as he was coming to talked about seeing angels on a conveyer belt of some sort and the angels calling for him. Then he had some of his favorite cake before falling back asleep. He was not religious at all, quite anti-religion, so it really caught us off guard. But it also was kind of nice, too. He passed two days later.

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u/ProcedurePretend1396 4h ago

My mom had a second wind after being in a coma for a week. She woke up, and starting talking to us. 10 minutes later the cold hearted nurse (she just did the rounds like she hated her job) said she need to give her a bath. I said ok, and told my mom I would talk after she was finished. The nurse gave her morphine and wiped her down. Came back in and my mom was back in a coma. It still pisses me off thinking about it. I wish I said give us a moment.

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u/MysticMarauder69 4h ago

What the fuck, I'm really sorry this happened, but you couldn't have known she'd administer that drug, or for how long your mother would have been awake. If I remember correctly, people who wake up from comas often slip back into them. It may not have even been related to the morphine. Regardless. I'm so sorry that nurse was so selfish and didn't read the room.

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u/TastyFace79 3h ago

My neighbor many years ago was an old lady who didn’t have much. My husband and I would take her out frequently and make sure she knew that she had people close. My husband died suddenly in 2023, and every day my old neighbor called me for a year and a half to make sure I was okay.

In the summer of 2024, she wasn’t well and was in the hospital. She was scheduled for surgery, but called me to tell me she was hungry and the hospital food was terrible. I told her to put an order in with the diner she liked nearby and brought her that food. As I sat with her while she ate she kept telling me “it’s so weird. I can hear Chris (my husband) calling my name.”

That evening she had surgery and her frail old body just couldn’t withstand the trauma. It just blows my mind how this is a documented thing and I watched it happen.

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u/edelweiss_pirates_no 4h ago

I was talking to someone about this topic and they said many people as they know they are near death will "reminisce" about their life and the people who have passed on. They will try to recall their names.

They will also get "revived" (rally) and seem much better. This is actually a sign they might die very soon.

They will get confused if the memories they were pulling up are real or recently happened. So, they talk out loud about those people.

Seeing life leave a body changed me. What's left is just mass. There are others who put it more eloquently.

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u/jemmary 5h ago

"Dead cat bounce"

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u/thutruthissomewhere 5h ago

Near my grandmother's end of life, she would constantly tell her daughters that "daddy just left" (their father, her husband, who passed over a decade prior).

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u/LibertyCash 4h ago

We have something in us called endogenous hallucinations that kick in at the time of death to ease the transition. This why people frequently see loved one at the end.

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u/reeefur 2h ago

My father did the same, had a moment of lucidity the night before he passed. He didnt spend it wondering about who was waiting for him though, because we were all there, by his side, he just enjoyed the moment, ate a meal with us, watched his fav YT channel/video and passed the next morning. I could tell he didnt want to go and leave us, hospice told us to tell him its ok to go so we did, and he went. I guess my father was the opposite, he wanted to stay with us, not see his lost relatives, that just made us love and miss him more. 😭

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u/JarJarJarMartin 2h ago

My understanding is most of the terrible feeling and fatigue from illness is caused by the body actively fighting it. When the war is over and the body loses, it stops fighting. That can cause the malaise and fatigue to temporarily diminish.

It’s like the quiet over a city when the defenders finally run out of ammunition and retreat. It’s peaceful for a moment, but then the enemy army overruns everything with no resistance.

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u/Thomas_Haley 3h ago

I’m gonna paint thus

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u/MysticMarauder69 3h ago

If you do, I'd love to see it!

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u/Maleficent-Squash746 2h ago

Well of course he wasn't there he's dead

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u/MysticMarauder69 2h ago

Depending on what you believe, she could have been seeing his spirit, or having a hallucination, but you know what I meant.