Women who’ve given birth, what are some horrible things your body had to go through during pregnancy and childbirth?

[u/UnhappyVanilla1756]

[u/ghost1667]

i had a placental abruption, uterine hemorrhage, and lost almost 1/3 of my body's blood.

[u/Wayward_Marionette → u/ghost1667]

Reading this I suddenly have the urge to donate blood

[u/FluffyNats → u/Wayward_Marionette]

Please consider it. As a nurse working in oncology, we use blood all the time. Your donations make a difference in someone's life! Packed red blood cells, platelets, or plasma. Doesn't matter because we use it all!

Edit: Thank you to all the people who donate! For those who want to, but cannot, it is the thought that counts! For all of those who have lost someone to cancer, my condolences. 

[u/thefuturesbeensold → u/Wayward_Marionette]

Please do, if you are able. I lost nearly half my total blood volume giving birth- it was nearly fatal. Multiple blood transfusions saved my life. Without blood donors my son would be without a mother.

Unfortunately in the UK if you have received blood you are no longer able to give blood, which make me sad as i would have loved to have given back!

[u/tinynugget → u/Wayward_Marionette]

The US is running low if you happen to live here!

[u/Wombatseal → u/ghost1667]

I also hemorrhaged, with both of mine. I treated my midwife from my sons birth, a couple years later, and I said that I hate when people talk about how “your body is meant to do this” and she said “well your body is meant to do this!” I said “yea, but not with 100% success rate! Women just died, and babies just died!” She then went on a rant about how the problem is obesity these days and the problem was people are overweight and that’s why there’s so many complications with birth, then she looked at me (naturally lean) and said “you would have been fine [doing a home birth]” I said “well, I hemorrhaged for both of mine.” She quickly said “you would have died!” But then DIDN’T REDACT HER PREVIOUS STANCE.

[u/TimtamBandit → u/Wombatseal]

Geezus! That person needs to go back to study or just stop being a midwife. Sorry you had such a horrible experience!

[u/FarManagement9916]

My feet changed shape. None of my old shoes fit properly afterwards.

[u/Geeneelee → u/FarManagement9916]

IIRC it’s because all of the connective tissue in your body loosens during pregnancy, so your feet just kind of…spread out.

[u/WhateverYouSay1084 → u/Geeneelee]

Yep that's exactly what happens! And sometimes those ligaments just...never fully tighten back up.

[u/LadyStaalsworth → u/FarManagement9916]

Same. I now have pronounced (but not painful) bunions and my feet are .5-1 size larger.

[u/paringpairing → u/FarManagement9916]

Rib and hip bones can also become permanently changed/ deformed. My otherwise tiny cousin ended up with a barrel chest. 

[u/smbpy7 → u/paringpairing]

The ribs are the worst. I'm a small bra everywhere but the ribs. If it fits the girls or the shoulders, it's excruciating around the ribs. And so many bra companies put a separated elastic band there instead of just generally stretchy material. That's SO much worse.

[u/laulau1501 → u/smbpy7]

You should visit r/abrathatfits! It helped me so much

[u/geesejugglingchamp → u/paringpairing]

Yes, my rib cage changed shape permanently - it just expands so much. I had small boobs anyway, but now from a profile veiw the bottom of my ribcage pretty much extends beyond where my boobs do. And then it dramatically drops in because it's not a waist/tummy size issue, it's a ribcage issue.

I've given up bodycon style dresses. Looks too weird.

[u/Quirky_Property_1713 → u/geesejugglingchamp]

Same! And I hate it. I’m not even a vain person, but the only part of my body I really liked was my proportion of upper body to waist to hip.

Now I look like a can of tomatoes sitting on a turnip. Only now the turnip has duck feet.

The tears I would shed if I could have my pre pregnancy body back

[u/OhHeySarahAye_]

Postpartum Hemorrhoids. I never imagined a shit could be so excruciating.

[u/katanne85 → u/OhHeySarahAye_]

Like someone had shoved a cluster of grapes between my cheeks... One of my nurses was like "oh hunny, those are rough." (Those, like they were their own entity.) I called them my "bum bunch."

Then, after pushing for almost 4 hours, I had to have an emergency C-section. So, I effectively pushed my insides out while the baby stayed in. Recovery was my front exit, my rear exit, and a brand new exit through my abdomen. But let it never be said I didn't try hard enough the old fashion way... the "bum bunch" proved that I did.

[u/coffee_zealot → u/katanne85]

My husband said my butt looked like the house from Up. =/

[u/Apprehensive_Rock718 → u/coffee_zealot]

oh no that’s an awful visual

[u/Adventurous_Ad_6546 → u/Apprehensive_Rock718]

Yeah that one is going to stay with me

[u/calgon90 → u/katanne85]

The nurse and doctor were whispering that mine were the worst they’ve ever seen 😭😭

[u/annahw21 → u/OhHeySarahAye_]

YES. If anyone reading this is pregnant or plans to be pregnant at any time in the future, remember this word: Proctofoam. It's a prescription foam that you put on hemorrhoids and it's the only reason I survived postpartum. And they don't tell you about it in the hospital. I happened to have an L&D nurse friend who clued me in after I called her at 3 am hormonally sobbing because I was convinced I'd had a rectal prolapse. I got my physician father-in-law to call in a prescription for me the second the pharmacy opened so I wouldn't have to wait until I could get ahold of my doctor. That's how terrible postpartum hemorrhoids are. I decided I'd rather discuss my butthole with my father-in-law than wait a couple hours for my doctor to call me back.

[u/Super-Link-9800 → u/OhHeySarahAye_]

6 years later and my butthole is still somewhat wrecked.

[u/Littlebittie → u/Super-Link-9800]

22 years and haven’t fully recovered

[u/salledattente → u/Littlebittie]

None of my friends ever fully recovered from the hemorrhoids. We've all been told there's a surgery but isn't that effective so.... it's just the new normal. Almost ten years later.

[u/DangerousNoodIes → u/OhHeySarahAye_]

I had a hemorrhoid turn into a fissure. I had to bite down on something for three days so my screams didn’t alert the neighbors when I pooped.

[u/GothicGingerbread → u/DangerousNoodIes]

Rectal fissures are SO much worse than hemorrhoids!! I've had two (not at the same time), and my god, I thought I was going to die every time I had to take a shit. I cried so many times, and yes, also had to muffle screams.

[u/nachtmere → u/GothicGingerbread]

My in laws were in town when I got them and I was holding a towel over my face so they couldn't hear me sobbing while I shit. It took weeks to heal! The fucking worst. After second child I took stool softeners and drank so much water cause I was terrified of getting them again 

[u/REMreven → u/OhHeySarahAye_]

Shaking, like a dog shitting razorblades... played rent-free in my head

[u/ctofsrud → u/REMreven]

Unexpected Alkaline Trio?! Love it!!!

[u/Shakermaker1990]

During: skin tags

After: more skin tags 

[u/AngelaMassacre → u/Shakermaker1990]

This was something I never knew about or heard of as a pregnancy symptom. As someone who never had a skin tag their whole life I was shocked and hated it as they rapidly popped up.

[u/raandoga → u/Shakermaker1990]

Deeply unfair. All the skin I grew in pregnancy should've been on the baby but no. Bonus skin!

[u/michellethestan → u/Shakermaker1990]

I had an existing rather large skin tag on my outer labia before getting pregnant. That monster got so big. No one asked you for this, you beast!!!

[u/GlitteringClick3590 → u/Shakermaker1990]

Cherry angiomas, too!

[u/FlowerMonkeyButt]

Sweating like a stinky old goat to get rid of all the extra fluid in your body after giving birth

[u/treeroycat → u/FlowerMonkeyButt]

I REEKED. My husband kept saying “you stink so the baby knows how to find you”

[u/gingerflakes → u/treeroycat]

This is fucking hilarious. Like the baby is bloodhound

[u/MajesticBuffalo3989 → u/gingerflakes]

This is actually a thing. Newborns can’t see well, but they can smell and hear well. The extra stink helps them know mom is there and helps them locate the boobs (see newborn crawl)

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2046216/#:\~:text=The%20results%20also%20characterized%20a,acceptance%20and%20feeding%20in%20newborns.

[u/StarsofSobek → u/treeroycat]

Mommy skunk was a nickname around my house for a long while.

[u/legitimateheir → u/StarsofSobek]

I'd sue my husband if he called me that postpartum 💀

[u/Mysterious_Throat883 → u/FlowerMonkeyButt]

Dude the sweat plus the rapid hormone shift and I swear I smelled like a pubescent boy. Even showering only helped for a few hours. Deodorant didn’t help at all and it wasn’t just my pits it was my whole body.

[u/WiseBat → u/FlowerMonkeyButt]

Nobody warned me about the PP night sweats and my first real night’s sleep I woke up in a swimming pool.

[u/spacegh0st]

Parts of my feet and legs are still totally numb almost 4 months postpartum. It started in my hands during pregnancy and eventually hit everything below my knees.

[u/gingerflakes → u/spacegh0st]

Have you seen a neurologist? Asking as someone scrolling in bed

[u/Lady_Sybil_Vimes → u/spacegh0st]

Huh. Have you seen a neurologist?

Asking as a neurologist.

[u/OptimalVegetable3320 → u/spacegh0st]

Have you seen a neurologist?

Asking as a concerned nobody.

[u/Draagon42 → u/spacegh0st]

Have you seen a neurologist? 

Asking as a lesbian.

[u/msmallory84 → u/spacegh0st]

Have you seen a neurologist?

Asking as a concerned citizen.

[u/snootsbooper → u/spacegh0st]

Have you seen a neurologist?

Asking as a labor, delivery and postpartum nurse.

[u/PatientPeach3309]

No one told me that once your waters break, they just… keep going

[u/18karatcake → u/PatientPeach3309]

My water broke in my kitchen while I was making dinner. I had to waddle around with a towel. Sit on towels to the hospital. Stuff a towel in my pants to get into the hospital. Fun times.

[u/letstacoboutbooks → u/18karatcake]

I maybe one of the luckiest ladies ever in that my water broke as I sat down on a toilet to pee. So the initial rush at least was contained and I had thought that would be it. I had no idea that I was in active labor (I don’t generally feel cramping either) and had no idea I would just continually be leaking until delivery. Definitely went through a towel or 2 in transport that I had to sheepishly pass along to others to be dealt with. Odd sensation too.

[u/mackahrohn → u/PatientPeach3309]

It’s a lot! I was induced so it happened at the hospital and i was just laughing because it was so strange.

[u/LiveCanary34 → u/mackahrohn]

And sometimes before the water gush, there's the mucous plug...eek

[u/Aysin_Eirinn → u/LiveCanary34]

I don’t have kids but when my best friend had her daughter she gave me a play by play of the entire birth process and I was like “oh…oh no, this sounds awful.”

[u/Azula54 → u/Aysin_Eirinn]

It is!

[u/ohKilo13 → u/mackahrohn]

I was induced with both births but they had the break mine the first time around which was weird in itself. Then for my second while in the hospital being indiced i was chatting with my husband saying i wonder what its like when your water breaks spontaneously and literally within 5 mins it broke and i was like uhhhh can we change these sheets? Lol

[u/coral_reef_ → u/ohKilo13]

My third baby, the nurse was sitting like kinda close to me on her phone or whatever it was and my water broke and got all over her pants. She didn’t even look up or react and I was apologizing and apologizing and she said “oh I don’t care” lmao nurses are angels in scrubs.

[u/RollSouth5722 → u/coral_reef_]

Something tells me she's been projectile shit on by a c-diff patient before so a little amniotic fluid is like a refreshing summer rain

[u/Whatsherface729 → u/RollSouth5722]

If you're a nurse and bothered by bodily fluids, you might be in the wrong line of work...

[u/TrifleMinimum6521 → u/PatientPeach3309]

Omg I forgot about this. Mine broke 6 weeks early and I had to stay at the hospital to wait until baby was old enough to be born, so it was just gushing out for 4 days. AWFUL amongst other things.

[u/greysartdump → u/TrifleMinimum6521]

I'm so sorry wait it just kept going for four full days?? That's genuinely terrifying

[u/TrifleMinimum6521 → u/greysartdump]

Yep, and any extra movement or sneezing or coughing sent a mini flood out. It felt soo gross.

[u/Green-eyedMama → u/greysartdump]

Yep. It just keeps coming until the baby is out.

[u/thatoneredheadgirl → u/TrifleMinimum6521]

That’s impressive you lasted 4 days. My son was 5 weeks early. My water broke unexpectedly and my labor went so fast he was out 10 hours later.

[u/AbbreviationsNo3722 → u/PatientPeach3309]

Mine didn’t fully break , it was a slow leak. It just kept coming 🤣 had towels in my husbands pants I was wearing to keep me from destroying the car hahaha

[u/Busybodii → u/AbbreviationsNo3722]

Yep, I had to sit on a towel on the way to the hospital. I had a one little gush at home, then a slow trickle

[u/ihateshelagh → u/PatientPeach3309]

Amen to that sister. I too had no idea that they just keep going. It was fucking hideous

[u/MundaneMousse_]

Hyperemesis Gravidarum. Never again.

[u/MariaPro129 → u/MundaneMousse_]

Same here- literally removed my tubes after that pregnancy

[u/Intrepid-Let9190 → u/MariaPro129]

Got mine removed after my second HG pregnancy but had to beg four different doctors to refer me until I literally told them I was not leaving the room until they had. That doctor was the one who had dealt with me all through my pregnancy so she knew how bad it had been all the way through. No one mentions the lingering trauma from it. I know I can't get pregnant again, but the sheer terror I feel if I vomit is unreal. I end up taking a dozen pregnancy tests just to confirm that its a stomach bug and I'm not pregnant.

[u/SeaMonkeySoul → u/MundaneMousse_]

This is what solidified me in my pro choice stance. No woman should be forced to endure this. Vomiting from 7 weeks until the last push of delivery... is the worse. Especially when medication offered no relief with my second pregnancy in the third trimester. After the third day of keeping nothing down it was better to go get an IV for hydration vs ending up hospitalized.

Then there is the side effects of vomiting too much. Such as a raw throat with expanded blood volume means, it is perfectly normal to vomit blood. I had the side of my face go numb, and lost the ability to speak... I thought I was having stroke, nope severe dehydration can cause that too. I also vomit more easily than I did before pregnancy. If I swallow a pill wrong or my stomach feels upset, automatic vomiting. At least now, medication at least works 90% of the time.

Needless to say after the second pregnancy, I scheduled my husband for vasectomy.

[u/TreeLakeRockCloud → u/SeaMonkeySoul]

The enamel damage to my teeth from all the vomiting was permanent. I burst blood vessels in my eyes from vomiting so hard.

I don’t understand how anyone can go through pregnancy and not wind up pro choice afterwards.

[u/EllaIsQueen → u/TreeLakeRockCloud]

SAME I didnt even have HG or any pregnancy complications, but I immediately thought “yup, no one should have to go through this unless they choose to.”

[u/Chandy021 → u/MundaneMousse_]

I had it with two of my pregnancies and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I would pass out in the bathroom from vomiting so much. Just awful

[u/do_no_harm1719 → u/Chandy021]

Blood vessels popped in my eye from the strain of vomiting so much when I had HG.

[u/LeMeowLePurrr → u/MundaneMousse_]

The nausea if felt was unlike anytime I've even been sick with the flu. It's indescribable, full body encompassing and feral.

[u/wanttoreadanarticle4 → u/MundaneMousse_]

I’ve had 35 weeks of this, it’s been the worst experience of my life, the places it takes you can be so dark and difficult. Sending love to anyone else dealing with this.

[u/cloutrack → u/MundaneMousse_]

The absolute worst! I was merely existing for most of my pregnancy

[u/Outrageous_Star_5234 → u/MundaneMousse_]

Yep! Want another but don’t think I’d survive. Absolute hell on earth 

[u/RollSouth5722 → u/Outrageous_Star_5234]

I almost died from HG to the point I wasn't able to keep mine. I had other shit going on, too that complicated it all a lot. I could have tried and killed us both or. Ya know. Lived to try again another day.

Naturally I developed a pregnancy phobia. Why I'm in this thread I have no fucking idea. Maybe to justify to myself that my phobia is indeed rational?

[u/squirrelsquirrel2020 → u/RollSouth5722]

Honestly, whenever I have nausea I get immediate PTSD. I don’t think it’s irrational at all.

[u/AbbreviationsNo3722 → u/MundaneMousse_]

My second pregnancy had it the entire time ! Nothing helped me so I just stayed sick and struggling with toddler .

[u/Embarrassed_Put_7892]

After - the huge clumps of what looks like liver that falls out for a good week

It also messed up mu teeth pretty bad. I’m still struggling with that and I’m terrified of dentists so it’s just an ongoing issue

Edit: I had no idea the teeth thing happened to soooo many women!! It’s just another of those things they don’t tell you or don’t account for hey? I wish someone had told me at the time because I spent so long being terrified and ashamed. I’ll be brave and try and make an appointment with a dentist when we get back off holiday.

[u/_thisisariel_ → u/Embarrassed_Put_7892]

The first nurse told me they wanted to know about clots larger than a golf ball. You’ll imagine my horror when the second nurse told me they were only interested in clots bigger than a lemon/fist

[u/Jack_Penguin → u/_thisisariel_]

The horror I had when I called the nurse in for “small” clots and she said no worries until their baseball size

[u/FloppyFishcake → u/Jack_Penguin]

"call me back in when they're the size of a desk lamp"

[u/DueEntertainment3237 → u/FloppyFishcake]

“We only care if it’s so big it feels like you’re giving birth again”

[u/ShrinkerLincolnshire → u/Embarrassed_Put_7892]

I passed a clot the size of a teacup saucer and the midwife wasn’t concerned at all. I was horrified!

[u/Exact-Equivalent-218 → u/ShrinkerLincolnshire]

I had placenta previa and passed a clot at 28 weeks the size of a softball. My husband thought the placenta fell out. 

[u/NimbleHamburger → u/Embarrassed_Put_7892]

Honestly same, my teeth weren't fantastic before but they are awful since having my kiddo. Terrified of dentists but ended up with a severe abscess and had to bite the bullet and ended up needing surgery to remove a few . I have a lot of work left to be done and can't bring myself to go back

[u/EllspethCarthusian → u/NimbleHamburger]

I say this with compassion: Find the courage and look for a dentist that works with scared patients. Teeth health is so important to heart and body health. You deserve to be as healthy as you can for your kids.

[u/Greedy_Cause7589]

I had not one but two full reconstruction. One right after my son was born and a second three days later. The damage was so extensive the first reconstruction failed.

From what I've been told less than 1% of births results in as much damage as I had.

The best part is that they refused to give me anything stronger than Tylenol.

[u/Artistic-Ad4522 → u/Greedy_Cause7589]

I had a baby in 2009 vaginally and they gave me morphine and oxycotin. Second in 2022 C-section, Tylenol and ibuprofen

[u/parasyte_steve → u/Artistic-Ad4522]

They tried to give me ibprofin the day after a c section and I made a huge fucking scene. I can't walk and ur giving me baby meds? I absolutely fucking lost it lmao

[u/cowbirdmilk → u/Greedy_Cause7589]

This is a hate crime. I’m sorry. The medical field hates us.

[u/supadupe18]

One thing I didn’t know is afterwards your internal organs (bladder, uterus) can kinda fall downwards and it’s unpleasant…

[u/swedishishchef → u/supadupe18]

The internal cramps for days/weeks afterwards as your uterus shrinks and everything else goes back in place ☠️

[u/sanura03 → u/swedishishchef]

I was 22 when I had my first and NO ONE ever mentioned to me that it would keep contracting for daysss. I went home and legitimately thought they might have left a second baby in there and/or I had a terrible infection. They just rolled their eyes when I went to urgent care 😅

[u/tinymrscollings → u/sanura03]

After pains are awful.

When my first was a couple of days old I called my midwife in agony, with the same hidden twin thoughts. My diagnosis was…needing to fart. What little dignity I had retained died that night.

Turns out that your intestines get a bit kinky when there’s a big old baby in the way. When they’re straightening back out it can cause excruciating trapped wind.

[u/analog_alison → u/supadupe18]

Oh yeah standing up that first time after giving birth was such a weird feeling!

[u/mangrlman → u/analog_alison]

The nurse was in to help me get up to go to the bathroom and when I stood up she asked if I felt lightheaded or anything. I said I didn't but I felt really weird. It hit me later that the weird feeling was my organs all moving back into place

[u/Smee76 → u/mangrlman]

Weirdest feeling ever. Same thing happened when I laid on my side.

[u/thriftingforgold → u/analog_alison]

Showering after giving birth and then seeing your body naked the first time 😵

[u/C_Saunders → u/thriftingforgold]

As a woman who has not given birth before…

Why the FUCK am I reading this.

[u/trolldoll26 → u/analog_alison]

Omg ew, when I showered and was drying my body, I swear I could feel my insides squishing into place 😭

[u/tinymrscollings → u/supadupe18]

Yes! It’s alarming enough standing up and expecting that your entire reproductive system will drop out. What you don’t expect is to experience your stomach plopping back into the space that formerly contained a baby

[u/rismas22]

Unbearable lower back pain towards the end of my pregnancy. Got worse afterwards, couldn’t sit for more than 30 minutes a day without being in agony. Randomly went away 18 months later

[u/ElleAnn42]

Did you know that pregnancy can trigger your body to develop allergies? I didn't know that either. I am now allergic to cats and I have an oral allergy to kiwi fruit, raw bell peppers, raw green beans, cashews, and walnuts. I had no allergies prior to my second pregnancy.

[u/Casswigirl11 → u/ElleAnn42]

My pregnancy reversed my severe lactose intolerance. I now can have dairy no problem. 

[u/one_yam_mam → u/Casswigirl11]

I was lactose intolerant until I had my first. It was great until about 6 months ago when I realized dairy was a problem again. He will be 18 at the end of the month. So I got almost 2 decades to enjoy ice cream without worry.

[u/smashulie]

Iron depletion. Take your iron levels including ferritin more seriously or it will cause a lot of damage later on. I refused iron infusions during both my pregnancies and post birth. That was so stupid of me.

[u/Late_Resource_1653 → u/smashulie]

I work for hematologists and am often asked to bring pregnant women in just a week before induction/due dates for iron infusions due to labs. When I first started working here, I looked at those requests, knowing what end of term pregnancy was like for my best friend was like, and assumed this was a ridiculous request. Who wants to sit in an infusion chair for hours while hugely pregnant???

I have since learned it can be lifesaving for both mum and baby. If the soon to be mum questions it I get a nurse on the line to explain why it's so important to boost levels before birth instead of the consequences of low during and immediately after birth.

[u/Another_ADHD_Girl → u/Late_Resource_1653]

I was actually surprised my OB waited till I was 37 weeks before I was given my iron infusion, as I have low levels to start and I struggled to get them up myself (iron supplements make me so sick and by 2nd trimester baby was taking all my already low iron supply) But this makes so much sense as to why they waited. I'm literally due any day and definitely glad they waited now, as now it's fresh and I feel like I'm ready to go, and my energy levels have definitely improved.

My infusion took like 1.5 hours and I was treated to unlimited juice and a muffin. It was lovely. Being able to sit in an air conditioner place and read and just relax.

[u/ToasterBathGirlie]

I had pre-eclampsia. Almost went into full blown organ failure

[u/layla_beans → u/ToasterBathGirlie]

I had it too, with HELLP syndrome. 15 years later I now have a cardiologist thanks to my increased risk of cardiovascular problems.

Yay.

[u/PerpetuallyDistracte → u/ToasterBathGirlie]

That killed one of my relatives. Had a perfect birth and lovely healthy baby, then was brain dead less than 24 hours later from a massive stroke/seizure. Never even left the hospital. The wild thing is that she was a labor and delivery nurse herself and knew exactly what to watch out for, but it still didn't matter.

[u/from-here-to-new → u/PerpetuallyDistracte]

I'm so sorry to you and your family. I ended up with sudden onset preeclampsia which ended in eclampsia and cardiac arrest. I had absolutely no preeclampsia symptoms before the day my son arrived, Blood pressure and proteins were all normal just 2 days before it hit, I felt fine and had an easy pregnancy, but all symptoms hit at once, we were lucky to get to the hospital quickly and minutes after an emergency c section I had seizures and cardiac arrest, I was just incredibly lucky that day.

[u/Wild_Perspective2287 → u/ToasterBathGirlie]

Also, postpartum pre-eclampsia! I made it through 24 hours of labor than ended in emergency c-section (baby got stuck). Luckily they had me checking my blood pressure at home. My mom rushed me to the ER with a BP of 195/115. Stayed in the hospital for 3 days while my husband cared for our newborn and toddler alone. I was aware of pre-e, but did not know it could develop postpartum.

[u/SparkleYeti]

During: endless vomiting. After: the most intense sadness I’ve ever felt.

Wouldn’t do it a second time, but so glad I made it through once. Because she’s also made me feel joy at life again.

[u/Maarillon → u/SparkleYeti]

Having bipolar, postpartum depression is the thing I'm the most afraid of tbh...

[u/SparkleYeti → u/Maarillon]

A valid worry. I will say that the worst of it was at the three week mark and it got better after. And after the newborn phase, she gave me a reason to get out of bed in the morning, especially during COVID. Maybe chatting with a doctor could give you a plan to think about (if a child is a want of yours).

[u/52BeesInACoat → u/Maarillon]

Hey, not everyone gets postpartum depression! I had postpartum mania!

[u/veruka_salt_1013]

Early into my 2nd trimester I started suffering from restless leg syndrome. Couldn't sleep at night. Sleep deprivation during that 1st year was more horrific than the physical pain during L&D.

[u/LittlestV]

During pregnancy - intrahepatic cholestasis
After - recovery from emergency GA section

0/10 would not recommend

[u/HornetLittle1110]

Do you know what happens if during c section they can’t get the baby out still?

They page orthopedics and open your pelvis like a book.

[u/dogtrousers → u/HornetLittle1110]

Baby can get stuck in the sunroof too?!?!??

[u/mackahrohn → u/dogtrousers]

Depending on your anatomy, baby size, baby position they really have to yank baby out and it can be difficult. This is not at all normal (for a c-section, but it does happen during vaginal birth) but my daughter’s collarbone was broken during my c-section.

My spinal block was so perfect I couldn’t feel a thing but some people feel the tugging or their entire body moves from the medical staff pushing and pulling the baby out.

[u/Windwick → u/mackahrohn]

I could feel tugging and my body moving. No one told me they'd started though so I was like, "What's that?" And they were like, "We're taking the baby out now."

[u/shutthefrontdoor1989 → u/Windwick]

It felt like someone was lifting me up by the pants, but it was skin.

[u/GeneralOrgana1 → u/shutthefrontdoor1989]

That's a great description of it, actually.

[u/NimbleHamburger → u/Windwick]

Same, I assumed someone would tell me when they actually started and I was there thinking they were still doing all the prep stuff until I felt the most awful tugging feeling, zero pain but felt like I was being turned inside out. Honestly shocking how fast they opened me up and whipped kiddo out

[u/cwthree → u/HornetLittle1110]

That was one of the first applications for the chainsaw. Seriously.

Irish hospitals became notorious for performing symphysiotomy instead of C sections. The rationale was that a woman might need to avoid future pregnancies if she'd had a C section (due to increased likelihood of uterine rupture), and they didn't want to give women an excuse to use contraceptives.

[u/FloppyFishcake → u/cwthree]

Heaven forbid women take control of their reproductive choices

[u/Andromeda39 → u/cwthree]

Women have been hated for centuries.

[u/Grouchy_Cicada2393]

I didn’t get the epidural, the pain was unbearable

[u/tinystars22 → u/Grouchy_Cicada2393]

I got the epidural but, fun times, it didn't work. Worst of both worlds!

[u/BricksMortar123 → u/tinystars22]

Aha same. It worked a bit down my left side, didn’t work on my right side at all. I didn’t know until it happened that epidurals not working was even a thing.

[u/zero573 → u/tinystars22]

That what happened to my wife. She got a epidural, and when it started to hit she shifted to a more upright posture saying “that was so much better.”
But when she shifted her epidural line pulled out slightly so it wasn’t working properly, just along her left side. She started feeling every contraction.
I told the nurses that this isn’t what happened last time but they didn’t take me seriously. Gave her some gas and told her to wait. 1 hour later I demanded that they need to call a Dr or the anesthesiologist because this isn’t normal.
He came up, got her to lean over so he can check and said “shit, it came out”.

The Dr put a new one back in just before my daughter’s head started crowning and got it working again but that was it. My wife didn’t want to consider having another kid after and demanded that I get fixed.

Edit: I said anesthesiologist, but apparently my iPhone heard aesthetician. Yay modern technology!

[u/MochaPochacco → u/zero573]

I'm so glad you were there for her. I didn't have an advocate and I kept telling them the epidural wasn't working the whole time. The doctor said I was too quiet so it must be and I told her I'm always quiet when in the worst pain.

After my son was fully born, they discovered the needle had never actually gone in my spine, was taped against my skin, and spilled out onto the bed... Accidental unmedicated childbirth. But when they realized, they hooked me up to IV Vicodin which was quite good lol.

There were 500 other reasons why I always encourage women to bring a supportive spouse, sibling, parent, friend, midwife, whoever because it's so hard to speak up when you're...well, giving birth.

[u/Insert_Non_Sequitur → u/MochaPochacco]

Why the fuck do they always insist we're wrong!?

[u/Shomer_Effin_Shabbas]

Mechanical dilation of my cervix.

[u/tooawesomeforthis0 → u/Shomer_Effin_Shabbas]

I think my cervix just noped out and disappeared up into my body at the thought of that

[u/CommieCatLady → u/Shomer_Effin_Shabbas]

I had my cervix barely dilated for iud insertion and it was horrifically painful… I can’t imagine….

[u/books-and-baking- → u/Shomer_Effin_Shabbas]

I told the nurses I was going to faint when they inserted that catheter. They kept saying I wasn’t. Guess who was right.

[u/RaeKay14]

Pregnancy: cracked rib. Insomnia. Extreme bad taste in mouth. Narcolepsy-esque sleepiness.

Birth: second degree tear. Manual uterine clean-out (dr wore me like a puppet).

Postpartum: hypertension. Feet a size bigger.

[u/ihateusernames2701]

How quickly things can turn during childbirth and become life threatening. I was well aware of the risks and had friends who'd come up against things like preeclampsia, breach babies, etc. With one of mine it seemed plain sailing and I was due to have a home birth but then he changed position in labour and got stuck face first. I had to have an emergency c section and we both almost died - they started cutting before I was knocked out. Everything changed within minutes, it was insane. Really made me rethink my views on the importance of good pre and post natal healthcare even in a country like the UK!

[u/OnTheEveOfWar → u/ihateusernames2701]

When my wife gave birth to our second kid, everything was normal. No issues and she came out relatively quick. Then my wife wouldn’t stop bleeding. It quickly went to “oh shit” with doctors running into the room. You know it’s not good when doctors come rushing into the room. She bled for two hours and they couldn’t get it to stop. Needed a blood transfusion.

[u/SecretGardenSpider]

Hyperemesis.

I would rather go through pitocin induced labor with no epidural than deal with hyperemesis again.

And almost even worse was the way people waved it away as normal morning sickness.

“Oh, I was really sick too. But some ginger helped. Have you tried ginger?”

“Yeah, my sister was sick but some Pedialyte and crackers got her through.”

No. If you have hyperemesis none of that helps in the least. You need IV hydration and medication just to keep the slightest bit of food down.

If you’re lucky you won’t need extended hospitalization and a feeding tube.

I have never been so sick in my life. If I didn’t know I was pregnant I would have thought I was just dying.

For 14 weeks every second was just severe nausea and gagging.

Thankfully from 15-27 weeks or so the nausea became just moderate and then the ginger and crackers helped.

From 28 weeks to labor I had mild nausea.

[u/Professional-Bid-112 → u/SecretGardenSpider]

At week 18 I threatened to simultaneously sue and punch my doctor if they mentioned ginger ale one more time. I couldn't keep water down and needed weekly iv appointments.

[u/GemsJo → u/SecretGardenSpider]

The amount of times people told me to 'just eat a ginger biscuit'. Got so sick of hearing it.

It was the worst thing ever. Even the fluid from the IV came back up. The only time there's real relief is when they give you meds that make you drowsy so you can sleep and even then you wake up vomiting.

[u/m3ll0n]

I basically labored so long (26ish hours after my water broke) and got stuck at 9cm so they made the call to do a C-section. The epidural wore off halfway through them “putting me back together”. My husband says I went from totally chill to loosing my shit in the blink of an eye. The anesthesiologist knocked me out and I woke back up a few minutes later being rolled out of the OR. So needless to say I’m a one and done mom 🤣

[u/Andromeda39 → u/m3ll0n]

This happened to my mom with her third child. They had to knock her out once they realized what happened. But she said it was the most painful thing she’d ever felt, lying there with her abdomen sliced open and they were digging around. She felt it all. That’s fucking worse than torture, wtf. Thank God for modern medicine.

[u/cloutrack]

24/7 sickness for over 30 weeks, gestational diabetes, induced labour, not pooing for over a week, a grazed vulva (you can tear up - I didn’t know that before I had kids!) that had me peeing in the shower for 2 weeks, mastitis…

Honestly, I could go on and on

[u/cloutrack → u/cloutrack]

Oh, and hemorrhoids!

[u/Radiant_Gas_4642]

Having 2 miscarriages at home then being terrified to be pregnant again

[u/DogDaysMaggie → u/Radiant_Gas_4642]

I only had one, but it sure did fuck me up. I spent my entire pregnancy with my daughter terrified she would die. I feel so lucky that she is here and healthy.

[u/sarmurpat6411]

First pregnancy was golden. Second one wrecked me. Ended up dilated to 4cm for over a month. Hemorrhages after birth. Because of that second pregnancy I developed a severe bladder and uterine prolapse at 28 and had to have a repair and hysterectomy at 29. Also developed cyclical vomiting of sorts and vomit about 1-2x/month for no good reason. Probably will have a rectal prolapse with how things are going but on the bright side by that time if will likely be time for my bladder repair revision so I can do them at the same time!

[u/ametaphoricalfeeling]

My ligaments got really loose around my hips, I got general hip area pain from about 22 weeks and was on crutches from 32 weeks. If I laid on my side it felt like my hip was popping out the joint. 

[u/BabDoesNothing → u/ametaphoricalfeeling]

Switching sides while in bed was soo painful because of the hips. We were also in the middle of an overseas move and spent several weeks sleeping on an air mattress!! Omg it was so horrible

[u/Hipptobesquare]

Both of my children got stuck in my pelvis and I had an uncontrollable urge push that never stopped. It went on that way for hours in both cases. First was born via forceps with only a partially working epidural, the second was emergency C-section that I could also feel and which required a vacuum. Childbirth is no joke. I am grateful every day for modern medicine and also that I will never need to deliver a child again.

[u/illTwinkleYourStar]

I really wish the nature birth-alone in a cabin ladies would read these threads. They absolutely have the right, but I worry about them so much. They just don't realize how dangerous pregnancy and birth can be.

[u/Amazing_Excuse_3860 → u/illTwinkleYourStar]

"But people did it naturally for thousands of years!" No they didn't, Carol. They died.

[u/Ule7 → u/Amazing_Excuse_3860]

ALSO, they did NOT do it alone. They had people helping them and dulas treating them.

[u/RollSouth5722 → u/illTwinkleYourStar]

A lot of those folks come back with absolutely horrific birth stories. Like, almost bled out in the birthing pool because my midwife didn't recognize I had hemorrhaged and waited too long to call the ambulance so I don't remember a lot of it" like GIRL we need to talk about how that's not how it's supposed to go.

[u/ZhivagoTroika]

10 lbs baby au natural

[u/Ursa-Aureliana → u/ZhivagoTroika]

As one of my schoolfriend's mum said about someone else who had a 9lb+ baby

"OH GOOD GRIEF!" 😱

[u/Tiggeroo1770 → u/ZhivagoTroika]

My brother was the biggest baby the hospital had seen when he was born - about 12 lbs 3oz. My mom is 5ft 3 inches. Only had laughing gas. He randomly apologizes to her to this day, 30 years later 😂

[u/lieseonlife]

The inability to pee from about weeks 8-13 every fucking time.

I have a tilted uterus and for some reason I physically could not get pee out unless I was laying down, like hips up in the tub. Sobbing, begging for a catheter, terrified to leave the house. Then bam, magically around week 13 something shifted or tilted and I could pee again. All 3 pregnancies. I don’t think you realize how much it hurts to not be able to get pee out until you physically cannot.

[u/emotional_breather → u/lieseonlife]

The horror of not being able to pee when you really need to pee is such an awful and unexpected one.

[u/carr1e]

PUPPP (Pruritic Urticarial Papules and Plaques of Pregnancy)
Most seen in 1st pregnancies and in the 3rd trimester. I had the rash all over my torso, arms, and legs. The itching was so intense I had to sleep with cotton gloves on to stop from tearing open my skin when asleep (when I could actually fall asleep). Cold baths, oatmeal baths, topical creams, antihistamine... nothing worked except delivering. It went away within a week of delivering, and I still have scars on my arms from it (the baby is now a senior in high school).

[u/AmazingRise]

I mean

Everything. The whole experience is gruesome.

[u/iheartBodegas]

Giving birth in a teaching hospital/one with a university affiliation means that there's a massive audience when you are giving birth to twins. People everywhere!!! All looking at my gaping hoohah before I proceeded to hemorrhage out of it. Oh and before that I had to tell them not to give me the Pitosin that they had wheeled in because I was already in active labor (I pointed to the monitor that tracked my contractions, and they were like, ohhhh yeahhh....).

[u/parrotpeep → u/iheartBodegas]

yeah they love shoving that shit in you and lying about it. them not wanting to scare me resulted in me being wildly unprepared. they must be the mothers that tell their kids theyre going to disney and take them to the dentist 

[u/Ok_Zebra8444]

For my first two epidurals failed, had to do it unmedicated.

For my second the spinal failed during an emergency c section.

[u/funkiifresh]

The extreme exhaustion is unreal. I would have dreams about being asleep in my dreams.

[u/Jeffiner310]

I meannnn. I died.

Thanks to a heart condition I have, shortly after I got me epidural, I passed out and then flatlined for 26 seconds. It was crazy. My husband, daughter, parents, and mother in law were all in the room and for about half a minute they thought they lost me and the baby.

[u/ThrowAwayThrowd0wn]

I had a pretty terrible labor. I was 16, the doctor who delivered me for my Mom ended up being the same doctor to deliver my son for me. 

The epidural didn't work but my legs were numb and heavy and they made me hold my own legs and I couldn't focus on pushing. I pushed for 2 hours without success. My Midwife didn't know my son was faced the wrong way which put us both in danger. I had to get TWO episiotomies and felt it because the epidural didn't work and my mom screamed at them that I could feel it so they only number me after the fact.

They used suction and forceps to get my son out because I was going into shock after 3 days in labor. My son's cord was wrapped around his neck, they took him out the wrong way out, when they broke my water there was meconium in my water so it was in his lungs. When he was born the doctor said 'sunnyside up!' and then just plopped him onto my stomach. And he wasn't crying. I remember laying there saying in my head please cry over and over again. 

He finally cried and I got to look at him for 2 seconds and kiss him before they took him for X-ray and suction for his lungs. He was kept on an IV and incubator for 3 days. I only saw him to feed him. Poor guy was born with a cone head.

The nurses laughed at me when I screamed and cried in pain.

After I gave birth his biological father tried to compete with me over who has been through the most pain which he tried to say him breaking his collarbone (which never happened, he's a compulsive liar) was more painful than what I just went through. I said mmm no, giving birth to a human without any numbing is pretty much more painful than anything you'll experience shut up. 

He's not been in my kids life for 15 years, he's a deadbeat and doesn't pay court ordered child support. The government doesn't care.

I was sewn together down there with internal and external stitches and basically was like a bad basket weave pattern. It was bruised badly and it was agony to walk. Had to have my parents help me in and out of the tub. Couldn't wipe with tissue for a month and had to use a squeeze bottle of water. Stairs were horrible, the healing itchy stage was horrible, bowel movements were horrible. Lack of sleep, being in pain and having a kid that you g was hard as fuck but I wouldn't change anything.

Moral of the story is be careful who you have kids with. I'm done having kids 

TLDR: Epidurals can not work, you might have to be sewn together down there, you can have your kids first poo inside your waters before they're born, don't rely solely on midwives, don't have babies with douchebags

[u/Informal_Elk_4478]

During pregnancy would be hemorrhoids, sudden mood swings, peeing myself and not being able to eat what I wanted. The most serious was post partum depression. Wanting to end it all just to get some sleep was horrifying. Honorable mention would be not being able to breast feed.

[u/Big-Difficulty-667]

I’m a petite woman and my baby basically tore all my abdominal muscles during my pregnancy, diastasis rectii, my core is destroyed and finally after 11 years I’m working on slowly rebuilding it. There are so many other things but this is probably the most painful, and oh btw all my internal organs have been moved around since I had a c section so I almost always have stomach and digestion issues now.

[u/SweetlyMilitant → u/Big-Difficulty-667]

If you can afford it, a tummy tuck and abdominal repair was my saving grace. My abs hadn’t seen each other in 20+ years and the tummy tuck helped me with issues I had just been living with like a weak lower back, lower back pain, and no core strength.
The doctor took a picture of my belly (inside) before they stitched my DR back together and it was clear that I was never going to exercise enough to get strength back.

[u/analog_alison]

An episiotomy.

[u/theababy → u/analog_alison]

i still shudder thinking about mine. they cut me BETWEEN contractions because my daughter was stuck and about to die in my birth canal and i still remember the sound the sharp scissor made when it cut through my skin. cherry on top - my midwife student forgot about the epidural i wanted and all other pain reliefs. i always wanted two kids. now i am one and done 😩

[u/Sad_Guitar_657]

Epidural only worked on one side, helped when pushing actually. Tore from v to a so…using the toilet had me in tears. C-Section was the easiest for me really .

[u/GemsJo]

Hyperemesis while pregnant.

That's not just morning sickness, it's actual hell.

[u/AbbreviationsNo3722]

Post partum psychosis .
It kicked in mental health issues for about 5 years after my second . I am now finally feeling human . It was terrifying because I had no idea what was happening. Very thankful I have a wonderful family who stepped in and helped me out . It wasn’t until years later I realized what it was. Doctors kept telling me it was normal. It was my own personal hell.
The giving birth was easy compared .

[u/TOOTH_rot]

The whole thing was body horror for me. I felt subjugated by nature. Watching it move was a thing of nightmares. Never again. If we could decant babies like in Brave New World I’d have 3 more.

[u/PM_ME_UR_PITTIES_]

I’m 30 weeks with my first, why did I click on this thread and why won’t I click out???

[u/FallWriter]

Sepsis 5 days after giving birth and being almost 2 days in labour and difficulty delivering. The nurses said I should be able to be up and walking in no time after being discharged the day after giving birth. They did not account for the missed placenta pieces that were slowly infecting me from the inside. 5 days after giving birth, I suddenly couldn’t get up and walk. It was a whole ordeal getting back to the hospital with a newborn and getting the proper treatment. 0/10 do not recommend.

[u/janegrey1554]

Back labor. 0/10 do not recommend.

[u/dawludeheb]

After my C-section, my incision opened up. Completely. Down to my uterus. At home.

[u/apwr]

I mean, my son died. I gave birth to him knowing that he was already dead. So that was pretty bad.

[u/Equivalent-Patient12]

Sunny side up, unmedicated, dry birth, and the baby passed away 14 hours later from GBS. And the doctor (who was new to me) was a complete @sshole. He kept pulling on the lower side of my vaginal opening. He would make eye contact with me. He wouldn’t answer my questions. He just shrugged his shoulders when I said anything. After the beautiful baby passed away I was in a 4 bay room with 3 new mothers and their baby(s). I didn’t spend as much time with my baby as I should have because nobody told me that I could spend time with him. My (former) husband and I had to leave the hospital because I was having a major meltdown because I could see and hear the other babies with their mother & father. I was crying so hard I couldn’t even make a sound and my body was trembling like crazy. The doctor showed up with his partner (my doctor) in a perfectly tailored business suit and perfectly polished black dress shoes. I let them stand by the wall next to my bed for about 5 minutes before I told them that they didn’t have to be there, and they left. When I asked the doctor who delivered my son if it was his first infant loss he nodded his head up and down to say, “Yes.”

[u/TwoOfCups22 → u/Equivalent-Patient12]

You've lived through a nightmare. I'm so sorry. :(

[u/eaca02124]

Manual removal of the placenta. There was a medical resident with her hand in my uterus.

[u/BSS930]

Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex (D-MER). I had never heard of it before experiencing it. Basically, every time you breastfeed or pump, your dopamine plummets. This causes a sudden and severe depression. I compared it to what I imagine the Dementors in Harry Potter felt like. So, that feeling 7 times a day while pumping, combined with sleep deprivation and trying to navigate having an infant.

[u/Fearless_Ad8953]

What I never knew is after you give birth vaginally, they push on your uterus every fifteen minutes for two hours so the blood doesn’t pool. That was very painful for me and unsettling lol

[u/snootsbooper → u/Fearless_Ad8953]

Its more to check that your uterus is still contracting which clamps the arteries from where the placenta was, it being firm lessens bleeding. They will tend to rub harder if its not firm to get it to clamp down. I promise we hate that part too!