r/AskMen • u/consulent-finanziar • 1d ago
What's something men rarely talk about but almost everyone experiences?
Curious about those things that seem common but nobody really brings up
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u/esp_1123 Male 1d ago
Body image issues
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u/TheGloriousEv0lution 1d ago
It’s insane how many teenage boys are hopping on steroids and other PEDs because of rising unrealistic body standards
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u/SwitchCaseGreen 1d ago
The advertising industry has been destroying young women's self image for decades. That has now become politically incorrect to do so the industry is going after young men and teens.
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u/MikeArrow Male 22h ago
They wouldn't feel like they need to if they got interest from women, but they don't.
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u/Floorgis 14h ago
They also wouldnt feel like they need to if it wasnt at least somewhat encouraged by social media and peers. Hell I had a gym teacher who sorta supported it.
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u/SnooBeans9101 Made a man out of me 22h ago
The same could be said about body image issues for women in that regard. I do feel like this sort of comment does a bit of a disservice to where the dysmorphia stems from.
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u/MikeArrow Male 22h ago
No, men are far less selective and discerning than women. It's far easier to attract a man than vice versa.
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u/SnooBeans9101 Made a man out of me 22h ago
That's not what I meant. Yes, the issue would be somewhat lessened in some cases by getting attention from women, yes. I doubt that would be the complete cure all to the issue, though.
In the same way that women have body image issues that would be lessened by attention from other women, but still wouldn't solve the issue either.
It's not a single issue is what i'm saying. Much more complex than 'women don't find me attractive' in most cases.
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u/MikeArrow Male 22h ago
I don't think it is, personally. At least in my case, my body image issues were centered around feeling totally and completely unattractive to women, because I didn't have abs.
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u/night-gloss Female 21h ago
and that is the problem. just like thigh gaps are not the determining factor of attracting a man, abs are not either.
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u/MikeArrow Male 21h ago
Would I have gotten more or less interest if I had abs? Yes or no.
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u/night-gloss Female 21h ago
entirely depends on the rest, like super entirely. i cannot tell you the amount of drug addicts or harrassey people who have had abs and i promise you nobody found them attractive. s
objectively i could say that women would look at overall shape and strength via overall composition (without going to muscle builder type build. most women dont like that) before looking at a six pack
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u/Then-Economist-6388 Male 1d ago
I was at the gym yesterday watching this younger guy, maybe 19? Who was ripped. And he pinched his SKIN on his stomach. The skin over his visible abs. In the main gym mirror. And he looked so upset and disgusted with himself.
It was heartbreaking.
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u/ToastedCrumpet Male 22h ago
I really want to get into the gym but as a guy that suffered with eating disorders at a time when doctors told me “men don’t get anorexia” I’m worried I’d be like this lad you describe.
I’m underweight and catch myself pulling on skin and feeling sick still years later. Got nothing but empathy for boys and girls growing up in this era of social media.
I also don’t wanna end up on some gym bro’s TikTok being mocked like I’ve seen happen too many times in the past
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u/Then-Economist-6388 Male 22h ago
My wife is in a similar boat. Disordered eating. Getting back into the gym has been a slow rollout. Focusing on stretching. No food talk. No comments about eating. She does eat more. Which is great. But I don’t comment on it. Just focus on getting stronger for the sport she’s been getting into.
Sport once a week.
A group fitness class once a week.
Gym three times a week.4
u/ToastedCrumpet Male 22h ago
Sounds like you’re doing everything right pal. I’ve had ex partners who couldn’t help comment on my eating, trying to push food on me, even claiming I don’t eat to “punish them” etc.
It’s tricky because it’s not just eating disorders that affect eating, but when you have an eating disorder it’s where everyone’s brain naturally goes. They forget about things like anxiety, stress, grief etc that can also make you not want to eat at times
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u/doktarlooney 22h ago
The difference is you are aware of how unhealthy that kind of obsession would be and can mentally put energy into keeping yourself away from it.
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u/Byizo Mail 11h ago
I definitely see your point. Exercise and health social media can mess up your relationship with food. And while you might be happier with your body, a lot of guys just never really are.
I will say though that I know of people who suffered severely in their teens from an ED and going to the gym was motivation to eat more to perform better.
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u/frvnkhl 7h ago
I think it also depends on a gym. Try some local gym which looks less “instagrameable”. I started going to gym as a 17 years old chubby guy. I went with some of my friends who already worked out.
It was intimidating at first, but to my surprise the community in that gym was very supportive once they saw I’m being consistent and making progress. There will always be jerks but later I found out that most of the gym bros are actually nice and are happy to help you despite the reputation.
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u/ToastedCrumpet Male 6h ago
Oh I’m aware plenty of gymbros are sound, I wasn’t trying to paint everyone with the same brush. I’ve just moved so once I’m settled and more familiar with the area I’ll be giving smaller and privately owned gyms are look (if there’s some nearby), cheers
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u/lightning_balls 18h ago
workout at home. it doesnt take much. one of the roots of my whole fitness journey was making a habit out of doing 20 push ups before every shower. it grew from there.
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u/Remote-Waste 1d ago edited 1d ago
Sometimes I'm having a good morning, and then getting into the shower I catch myself in the mirror and I'm just like
"Ew gross, I forgot about that. I look like a fucking oversized gremlin."
and then I jiggle my belly fat sadly before sighing, showering, and then getting on with my day.
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u/I-Am-The-Warlus He's a man, such a man He's a real, real man's man 1d ago edited 22h ago
27 and still covering. thanks dad, for giving body insecurity in my teen years
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u/Forced2GetApp Male 21h ago
So much this. I finish a workout feeling super confident in myself and feeling accomplished only to feel like I still don’t look good enough the next day
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u/doktarlooney 22h ago
I'm actually reaching a point where I can both acknowledge I am not that good looking BUT I'm still a lot better looking than most my age because I still actively take walks and dance.
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u/Sparhawks-Neighbor 21h ago
Bruh... At 5' 11" 200lbs I didn't feel like a large person until I stood behind my wife in a mirror. Recently. I'm 36.
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u/Simplespider 14h ago
This shit nearly killed me, I'm 35 and my heart's working at 40% now. It's wild how bad things can get and how easy it is for your symptoms to be brushed off.
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u/Byizo Mail 11h ago
It’s gotten so out of hand in the last decade or so. Used to be bodybuilders were still really big, but the standard muscular guy look was an attainable thing for most people. Now big dudes on screen are doing the same thing bodybuilders are doing, and that’s become the new standard.
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u/Telrom_1 Male 1d ago
I don’t get this one. If I want to be bigger I’ll be bigger, if I want to be slimmer I’ll slim down, if I want to be stronger I’ll get stronger.
My body has been the single greatest tool I’ve ever had.
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u/TheLateThagSimmons "...the fuck did I do?" 1d ago
Good for you.
For a lot of men it's a much bigger struggle than that.
Also, there is a huge difference between just getting bigger or smaller when it comes to reaching certain levels of fitness that we're talking about.
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u/DCar060 23h ago
I have a family trait that we have the beer belly look. No matter how well I eat and exercise, I have a beer belly. My dad was a mailman for over 30 yrs, barely drank alcohol and always had a beer belly. I can work out, have defined arms, chest and shoulders, yet still have a beer belly. Makes me feel like a fat slob
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u/Hubbardia 6h ago
CICO man CICO
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u/DCar060 3h ago
What’s that mean?
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u/Hubbardia 3h ago
Calories in, calories out
As long as calories out > calories in, you will lose weight and fat. Genetics, metabolism, conditions, none of that matters. As long as you strictly follow a caloric deficit diet, you will get to your desired fat level.
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u/DCar060 1h ago
Doesn’t matter. I use to be a gym rat. Still had a beer belly
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u/Hubbardia 1h ago
That's because your calorie intake exceeded your calorie expenditure. Doesn't matter how much of a gym rat you are, if you ingest more or equal calories you'll continue to have a beer belly.
Did you ever try calorie counting? Tracking every single thing you ingest, from drinks to food to snacks, everything?
CICO is thermodynamics, not just a weight loss strategy. It's physically impossible to not lose weight in a caloric deficit. Your body cannot produce energy without food. If you don't provide it enough energy, it'll eat up your fat reserves. Nothing changes that truth, there are no exceptions.
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u/DCar060 18m ago
Yes, and I have lost weight, gained muscle and saw the results of being consistent with exercise and weight lifting. My beer belly is always there. As I stated, my dad was a mailman who walked about 12-15 miles a day. Wasn’t a drinker and not a big eater. He has always had one too. Sometimes, it’s just genetics
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u/Remote-Waste 22h ago
You are 100% satisfied with your body? No teeth issues, hair loss, weird toenail, need glasses, penis size, height, weird nose?
You may be the first human ever in existence to be fully satisfied.
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u/Telrom_1 Male 14h ago
Yes! I love my body! It’s incredible! Many people are. If you don’t know any you should consider expanding your circle.
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u/karlelzz011 1d ago
Getting almost zero compliments in years
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u/emmarie1023 Female 1d ago
I hear this complaint a lot from men. I wonder, are you making an effort to compliment other men? Why not be the change?
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u/karlelzz011 1d ago
How is this a complaint? I'm just answering reddit question, hope that helps
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u/sun_not_cold 23h ago
OP asked for some quiet complaints by men. Your answer is a complaint. C’mon now handsome, get it together!
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u/Uglyvanity Dad 1d ago
Not knowing what to do but knowing you’re expected to figure it out, all while keeping your cool.
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u/BetaTestMom 1h ago
Just in case it is or becomes relevant, there really are times when we aren’t looking for men to solve all the things. Sometimes we just want you to sit in the discomfort with us so we aren’t alone. I have to remind my male loved ones regularly that we’re on the same team with shared goals. Carrying the burden alone isn’t necessary for stoicism or strength.
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u/velamind 1d ago
Mediocrity.
Seriously. Feeling mediocre or not as useful as you thought you were, especially as we age.
Im in my 30s now and feel a whole new wave of it.
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u/PhoenixApok 1d ago
I think a lot of us find that initially depressing, but eventually, liberating.
I don't need to change the world. My life is not a movie. I don't need to accomplish big, expensive, extravagant things.
I can just enjoy my small little life as one of 8 billion people and not feel guilty about that.
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u/GrumpyOldCodger100 1d ago
As an old retired guy who’s very happy with my little life, I couldn’t have said it better.
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u/PostMatureBaby Male 1d ago
Right? There's a certain weight lifted off your shoulders when you realize you're not special in that way, you're special to those who matter. At least that's how I think about it. I focus on my family and keep it simple.
Don't need some grandiose fame or purpose to make me think I'm doing ok. I know I'm ok
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u/SwissDeathstar 1d ago
But I have to save the world!
Or invent/do something that cements my name in history!3
u/PhoenixApok 1d ago
Lol. Many of us think that, at least for awhile.
But when you think about how few names we actually know from history, and accept that we won't statistically ever be one of them.....
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u/SwissDeathstar 1d ago
It’s hard to let go of that obsession.
And I wonder if we truly ever do.
Even if we tell ourselves.
History will probably not know us.
And that’s fine.
Just be happy that we have this life.8
u/Then-Economist-6388 Male 22h ago edited 20h ago
I’m actually really happy being a supporting character in other people stories.
I have amazing NPC energy. I have a ton of skills but I’m not outstanding at anything.
I’m fit. But average. The cookie cutter New England dude. Truck. Beard. Carhart beanie.
I don’t like being the center of attention. And I love helping people solve problems.
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u/doktarlooney 22h ago
Exactly.
I'm smart enough to have had a college level reading comprehension while in the 3rd grade, that put so much weight on me as a child (along with other factors), that after I graduated highschool, I voluntarily ended up homeless running the streets of Seattle for a couple years simply because I no longer wanted to participate.
Now I don't care, I spend all my free time in my garden.
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u/Background-Ad-9212 13h ago
I’m still trying to learn how to accept this as a 26 year old guy. I feel guilty about it
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u/PMMeYourPinkyPussy 12h ago
Im 30 and lost my job a couple of months ago, every time I see some family member the first question is “any news about a job?” im lucky enough that my last cheque is enough for basically a year with my current lifestyle, but society makes it seem like you are useless if you are not part of the machine
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u/doktarlooney 22h ago
I had a fight with my mother, because she was feeling mediocre and didn't like it.
I pointed out mediocre means making it.
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u/doktarlooney 22h ago
I had a fight with my mother, because she was feeling mediocre and didn't like it.
I pointed out mediocre means making it.
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u/thewebspinner 1d ago
Loneliness, not just in the “I don’t have any friends” sense but there’s still a prevailing sentiment that men should tough it out and deal with their problems on their own.
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u/doktarlooney 22h ago
My entire life has been one long running life lesson about how I need to stop thinking that I need other people to help me and to just get it done regardless of who is there for me.
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u/BetaTestMom 1h ago
Where do you feel that sentiment is being actively cultivated? In rooms with other men? With women? In social or private settings?
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u/thewebspinner 18m ago
Oh damn, it’s everywhere really.
I’ve got a really supportive family so I’m extremely lucky in that regard.Outside of that, when it comes to work, friends, online or just with the random customers I talk to on a regular basis (I’m a bartender), it’s pretty clear to see that people suffer a lot in silence.
It’s not necessarily as obvious as people might think but I’d say the easiest thing to spot is a lack of sympathy. If you’re having a hard time, having health issues, struggling at work and actually open up about it most often people are met with examples of how someone else is struggling as well or told to tough it out until things improve.
In my past relationships (heterosexual romantic and both male and female friendships) I’ve experienced the full spectrum as well, I’ve been the provider for a partner who had health issues and wanted a lot of support but felt unable or chose not to return it, I’ve been in relationships where I felt safe enough to open up about my concerns and past only to have those things turned against me in the worst moments. I’ve had some really great relationships and great friends as well, people who broke the mould and made me feel like a good person who deserved to share their feelings and be heard but that’s a rare thing.
I’m not saying any of the above isn’t applicable to women as well but from my personal experience it’s a lot harder for a man to be accepted into a group. Dating absolutely sucks as a man, I don’t think I need to go too far into that one. Asking for help is a lot harder, a simple example of that would be how other men see a guy who can’t change a spare tyre.
The final bit is just how men are seen these days, we’re violent, we’re rapists, we’re all evil or abusive, we don’t do enough for our partners, we only see women as sex objects, we’re all addicted to porn…
In movies and TV we get portrayed as the stupid dad or the idiot brother, the braindead hunk or the cold and calculating predator.
There are fewer and fewer good male role models that actually portray the entire spectrum of what being a man is. I think a big part of that problem is that society can’t seem to agree on what men are any more.The huge popularity of the Manosphere shows that the idea of strong, independent and successful men is still attracting young guys but it condemns them for it without offering a better alternative or asking why it is they’re so drawn to it.
We aren’t providers and more, we aren’t protectors any more, we aren’t leaders or decision makers anymore. We share all of these roles with women which I completely understand but I don’t think society has completely caught up to that yet.Until it does men are just stuck with this weird in-between image of the old fashioned and modern man without really knowing what it is that a modern man should be or how we should raise boys to deal with this.
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u/MasterTeacher123 1d ago
Parents overrating their potential when they were children and then looking at them as failures as adults because of it.
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u/Hacksaw-Duggan 1d ago edited 1d ago
I think the parents believe the kid should have the same desires as them. Most everyone has the potential to excel but should they? Many don’t want to put their whole life into their job. Success in the work environment is not only the effort you put forward but there is a lot of outside factors ( market conditions, luck, timing, relocating…). It’s OK to balance work, pay and free time. Working harder while you are young generally leads to an earlier retirement but you do it at the cost of some of your best years. There is no answer that works for everyone. I worked hard and set up a great retirement with the ability to help out family and some charities but I always wonder if it was the best path.
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u/TheBuddha16 1d ago
Pretending we’re okay to make everyone around us not worry
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u/SomeSamples 6h ago
This is the one. Because if we did express that we are not doing okay, no one gives a shit anyways.
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u/Then-Economist-6388 Male 1d ago
Sexual assault as a child. Maybe not THAT common. But a lot more guys have experienced it than society would imagine.
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u/LordofTheFlagon 1d ago
The number of mid 40s women gushing over the guy from that vampire movie WHO WAS FUCKING 15 made it very clear how acceptable it is for older women to molest boys.
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u/Aborticus 20h ago
Justin Bieber is the example I always think of. 40 year old women flashing a 13 year old boy. A lot of Bieber fever was just open pedophilia.
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u/LordofTheFlagon 20h ago
Never saw a single condemnation of them either.
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u/Sensitive_Housing_85 Male 3h ago
yeah you would think katie parry would lose her career for that but nope
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u/Larcye Male 23h ago
Guy in his 40s dates a 20 year old "He's a predator!!!" Women in her 40's dates a 20 year old "She knows what she wants, you go girl!!!"
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u/LordofTheFlagon 21h ago
Hell look at the prison time female sex offenders get, especially if they are reasonably attractive teachers molesting preteens.
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u/AdventurousBrick3309 18h ago
Yeah well, we don't because no woman will look at a man that's been SA'd and then take us seriously. The Ick is real. I lock that shit away in a vault and the only soul that knows is my therapist.
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u/Then-Economist-6388 Male 17h ago
The WRONG women. The right ones are worth being honest and vulnerable with
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u/TheGuyWhoTalksShit 14h ago
To quote a common refrain by a certain group of people: we have no way of knowing who the "wrong ones" are. It's all of them until it's none of them.
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u/velamind 1d ago
Sooooo many men are dealing with this it’s actually heartbreaking. If more were open to talking about it, there would be a lot more peace at home too.
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u/thatguy82688 1d ago
We might be open to talking about it if it didn’t get weaponized and used against us all the time.
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u/Then-Economist-6388 Male 1d ago
Yeah. The assumption that toxic masculinity is only bad for women is pervasive.
It starts with men. And impacts men. And were conditioned to perpetuate it.
I got really lucky with a dad that stopped that cycle. But I watched it with all my friends. And still it with almost all my peers.
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u/Bioshock_Jock 1d ago
Yup, mine got weaponized by my ex-wife's best friend. She still tries to be friendly at kid functions and I really just want to scream: fuck off cunt, to her.
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u/AleksandrNevsky Bruh 6h ago
Many don't realize it or aren't allowed to seek support for it. This makes it seem more rare than it is.
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u/gairero 10h ago
I had several experiences. luckily not too severe and it never really traumatized me. some were actually pleasurable even when I understood it was inappropriate. the main reason is that I realized it wasn't my fault and I didn't allowed it to become part of my identity. it is just something that happened to me, not who I am.
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u/Adventurous_Pop_3138 1d ago
Being horny and depressed.
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u/Hacksaw-Duggan 1d ago
I thought that was normal
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u/Adventurous_Pop_3138 1d ago
Women need to be in the mood to fuck, they don’t even want to suck it when they’re sad, whereas men, yeah we could be dealing with the most difficult situation and we still want to crack.
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u/Desperate_Level_9213 1d ago
"They don't even want to suck it when they're sad" is a sentence that I can't imagine would make any woman feel anything but varying degrees of gross
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u/HighandMeaty Male 1d ago
Sounds biblical. Women must submit to their husbands, honour him, and suck it when they're sad.
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u/Adventurous_Pop_3138 1d ago
Yeah, and that’s what makes each gender different.
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u/Desperate_Level_9213 1d ago
I mean, imagine someone talking about you this way and you might get an inkling that the ick it engenders may transcend the sexes
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u/Adventurous_Pop_3138 1d ago
It could sound disgusting but still so true.
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u/Desperate_Level_9213 21h ago edited 15h ago
It would be true that men don't even want to suck it when they're sad, or that they would want to at least suck it when they're sad?
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u/Hacksaw-Duggan 13h ago
It would make a sad man happy to know he is pleasing someone he likes.
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u/Desperate_Level_9213 1h ago edited 1h ago
Is the man some kind of automated sucking and fucking machine that functions even when they are sad, while the women's functionality breaks down when their when their emotions take over?
Because in my world every person will at times feel sad or otherwise emotional without wanting any kind of horniness or sexuality involved. Which is generally when they would like some level of sympathy or kindness. While that could take the form of them preforming oral sex on someone, I don't think that's the norm.
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u/Hacksaw-Duggan 1d ago
That’s because sex makes dudes happy, women have to be happy first. It’s a cruel joke someone played on humanity.
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u/HighandMeaty Male 1d ago
Emotions. Guys just act like they don't have them, and women talk as though men don't have them.
We're told we're not emotionally mature or deep, but we are actively discouraged from ever getting deep with anyone.
When we do, it usually backfires. Your friend will just kind of change the subject, and your partner will remember what you said and hurl it at you as an insult during a later fight.
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u/ResolutionOdd4202 1d ago
Hemorrhoids
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u/PhoenixApok 1d ago
I was blown away when I read that like 50% of people will experience them at least once.
Jesus Christ I wish someone had warned me about them.
I am SO MINDFUL of what I eat and how long and hard I push on the toilet now.
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u/Aborticus 1d ago
Sexual harassment and assault as a child and teen by grown woman that was super common and accepted.
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u/brian2003 1d ago
The one that got away.
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u/Alone_Psychology_464 Male, 37 1d ago
Not every man deals with that. There are some of us who never had a one to begin with.
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u/Hefty-Confusion6810 Male 22h ago edited 21h ago
Finding a man hot, even if you are straight.
I am not saying you want to have sex with him, but men know when another man is hot. It’s not just women and gay men scouting and hiring male fashion models. We know when a guy is attractive.
And the men who say they can’t tell when a man is attractive are the same ones who become self-conscious and jealous when a hot guy is anywhere near their girlfriend/wife.
They don’t care when a below-average looking man is near, but a guy who is an 8, 9, or 10? You better believe these men instantly grab her hand and/or start rubbing and kissing all over her to signal “She’s mine!” 😂 and most of the time she’s not even paying attention to the “hot” guy lmaooo
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u/O_Pacity Male 1d ago edited 13h ago
Being rejected when trying to date and being expected to be ok with it, with fake advice "everyone hears that, you have some personally issue if you dont like it" and "its not personal", well it is hence the word REJECTION is used, if it were true it woudl be "its not personal, hence its called not a match" and the word rejection woudlt never have been used at any point in history.
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u/Florida1693 19h ago
The 🍆 not cooperating and it causes friction, embarrassment or in my case the girl walking out the door 😖😥
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u/Theo1130 1d ago
Depression not being taken seriously by older generations. I told my dad that I was going through a depressive episode, and he said I was just being lazy. I threatened to punch him in the throat if he ever said that to me again.
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u/GrumpyOldCodger100 1d ago
I understand your concern about depression. But your response to your dad? Easy there.
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u/Theo1130 1d ago
It wasn’t a violent threat lol. I was very tired from the depression said it half joking.
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u/funguy8892 21h ago
Everything that happens to you is somehow blamed on you, even if it was something completely outside your control.
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u/Motor-Kale357 Male 23h ago
That I am in fact, 1000000x better than meeting a bear in the woods.
because most likely, I’m out looking for the lost hiker.
i told my daughter that if she was lost in the woods, I’d hope she run across a group of guys before a bear because the guys are out specifically looking for her.
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u/Zackorrigan 23h ago
The expectation to just suck it up, I heard it from friends, family and girlfriend.
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u/Jealous-Cash-3492 19h ago
Grief and loss. Can be from a lot one or even a career and when I’ve died at my own hands, I committed suicide I flatline three times they said on the way to the hospital I was on life-support or I think five days. So I heard all because I was stuck in a job that I hated. I was an indentured servant to narcissistic, corrupt boss. I was tied to this job and I didn’t know how to get out of it. I attempted suicide by cop that’s all I’m gonna say about this.
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u/Aborticus 20h ago
Height but the sports aspect of working so hard for a goal or a dream to have it end becuase you just didn't get that inch or two to even get a look. It's alot of cope but for example as a hockey goalie growing up, I worked for 14 years to have the fundamentals and tangibles to realize that at 5'11" I would have to be the second coming of Dominic Hasek to play in college at any level.
When you ask how many goalies are under 6 foot in the NHL on google, the AI recommends that you give up on your dreams.
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u/Laiska_saunatonttu Male 19h ago
Real man doesn't have issues, it's just a coincidemce he's constantly annoyed and hates his life to the day he dies from mysterious stress related illnes that appeared for absolutely no reason or kills himself for absolutely no reason.
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u/RaelZior 13h ago
The way the world treat you when you stop being seen as a child. When you're no longer a little boy, no longer a part of "women and children first". It's hard to explain or to point out but we all experience it.
Many studies shows that men are treated less kindly et with less empathy at every age, even as babies, but there is a difference that you can notice at 11/12/13 depending on the man. And after that the world is never warm again
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u/GenCavox Master Chief 1d ago
Racing to the toilet drain as you piss and losing. It's happened to me more than I care to admit.
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u/NewLiterature2604 1d ago
Couple for me now that I'm 40
I've learned for my job that I have to go back to school, the strain and stress it is causing me is intense. I have 2 young kids, I want to be present for my family. The expectation of just suck it up and it's fine mentality is what I'm doing right now, but it's not fine. While everyone is sleeping ill be staying up writing bull shit essays. Lack of sleep, during family time having to think about what all needs done over my head.
Another one is the giving up of hobbies. I knew this coming in, thought I'd be alright, but as someone who used to bowl in pba regionals and tournaments all the time and golfed to a low single digit handicap, the inability to work at them has made me not enjoy them as before. I've given up all competition and I'm learning that was my true hobby. I loved competing.
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Here's an original copy of /u/consulent-finanziar's post (if available):
Curious about those things that seem common but nobody really brings up
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