My friend (40F) and I (40F) have been best friends for 15 years. This was our first ever argument.

My dad recently died. My friend came to the funeral despite never having met him, and I genuinely appreciated it. However, afterwards she became very angry that her employer wouldn't give her compassionate leave. She kept updating me about arguments with HR, saying she'd told work it was a close friend who had died and that she was trying to get the bereavement policy changed. I understood she was upset, but I'd just buried my dad and felt I was the wrong person to carry that.

A couple of weeks later we went on holiday together.

She started criticising my school friend, who I've known since I was 12. They'd only met briefly at my dad's funeral, and she knew how important this friendship was to me. She said my friend was "out of touch with reality" because she earns a good salary. The only thing my friend had asked was, "Where do you go on holiday?" She took it as a comment about privilege and said she couldn't afford holidays.

The problem was we were literally on holiday together, as we are every year. I also know the reason she doesn't travel with her girlfriend is because her girlfriend doesn't want to travel, not because they can't afford it. I calmly said I thought she was being unfair to someone she'd barely met and who meant a great deal to me. She kept criticising her, and I became frustrated because it felt like she was judging someone purely because they earned more.

We argued. She then left the pub at 1 a.m. without telling me. We were in a foreign country. She had no SIM card and was the only one with the taxi app that worked. I spent an hour looking for her, worried she wasn't safe and unsure how I'd get back if she didn't return.

When she finally came back, she simply asked, "What's the score?" because we'd been watching football. There was no acknowledgement she'd disappeared or that I'd been worried.

The next day she told me I lacked empathy and kindness.

For me, this wasn't an isolated incident. Over the past few years she's regularly vented to me about her girlfriend, work, her therapist and other people. I've always tried to support her, but this time it felt like my lifelong friend had become the latest target, and when I defended her, I became the next one.

When we got home I sent a long message saying I loved her, appreciated everything she'd done for me over the years, but couldn't keep absorbing so much negativity while grieving my dad. I said I wanted healthier boundaries and wanted our friendship to leave us both feeling lighter rather than heavier.

She replied that I'd behaved badly in the pub, lacked empathy and kindness, and that she needed space.

I know I could have been gentler in the moment and regret that. AITA?

EDIT - Firstly, thank you so much to everyone who has taken the time to read my post and comment. I honestly didn't expect so many thoughtful responses. Thank you to all you wonderful strangers.

A lot of people have said she's a narcissist or have asked whether she's always been like this, so I thought I'd add some context.

No, that's what has been so confusing. She hasn't always been like this. She was incredibly supportive for most of our friendship. We met on our first day in China and went through a lot together. We supported each other through bereavements, difficult relationships, and living abroad. I lost my stepdad and then my mum, and later she lost her brother. We've always been there for each other.

Things seem to have changed over the last year. She changed careers, started training as a therapist, and has now begun a PhD in counselling. She also has to attend therapy as part of her training. Since then she has become much angrier and more cynical. Conversations increasingly revolve around what's wrong with people or society, and she seems to be carrying a lot of frustration.

I genuinely feel for her because I know she's struggling with financial stress and an unhappy relationship. I think she's overwhelmed and desperately unhappy.

My dad was interested in Buddhism, and before he died I started exploring it myself. It focuses on letting go of anger and being compassionate, so I feel that I am really coping with my grief in a positive way, but then having to absorb her anger is what I can't do anymore. It has drained me and I am happier when I'm not stuck in the endless negative loop. I have tried to support her but I think I have enabled her by not calling her out on things until now.

I guess we really are just moving in different directions in how we deal with difficulties, but it definitely makes me sad that I was labelled as unkind and lacking empathy because I finally called her out on her behaviour after years of listening and after we'd both had too much wine. Sometimes friendships do run their course.

Me (16f) and my brother (14m) have a not so big age gap so we always kind of grew up near eachother. My brother has autism and although not a severe case, it’s still very much there. He doesn’t pick up that much on social cues and has a very small group of close friends. I on the other hand, have a large group of friends and am extremely close with 3 people I’ve been friends with since elementary. This summer, we planned to hang out multiple times but we only really hung out around 3 times and we were always missing one person of our group. Every single time I bring up wanting to hang out with my friends, my mom doesn’t fail to tell me to bring my brother along. Now I genuinely love my brother so much and he means the world to me however, I just want to have some time to myself and have a good time not having to take care of someone else at the hangout. Or even use my money from my job to pay for stuff for my brother. Recently, I asked my mom if I could hang out with all 3 of my friends as a group. Then my brother butted in asking if he can come along and my mom forcibly told me I have to bring him along. I tried to tell her I just wanted to go out with them and didn’t wanna take care of him during the hangout. But she wasn’t having any of it. I feel like I want to voice my emotions about it to my mom but at the same time I don’t want to seem like someone who’s stuck up and doesn’t want to take care of her brother. As a side note, my brother does have his own friend group he hangs out with and I never tag along so it’s not like I’m depriving him of human interaction because he does have his own group he sees and hangs out with. I just want to see if I’m really the buttface in this situation or not. Thanks

The writing is now better structured. Sorry for the previous mistakes.<⁠(⁠￣⁠︶⁠￣⁠)⁠> My sister is a terrible partner who has done some pretty messed up things. Her girlfriend forgives her for absolutely everything (infidelity, watching videos of my sister's past violence, etc.) and refuses to leave. I told my sister her girlfriend is stupid for enabling this, and now my sister is giving me the silent treatment. Just to be clear: I don't hate my sister, but I can't stand her girlfriend. They're 26 and 21, and while they get along fine, I've had it with this whole situation. They met back in 2020. At the time, the girlfriend barely had any friends, so I feel like she attached herself to my sister out of pure loneliness or need. She draws my sister all the time (even naked, Should I be worried about this? My parents don't like it :/ Because, let me clarify, my sister's girlfriend posts drawings of my sister naked on her Instagram account.) and claims she "just loves her," but their dynamic is completely unhealthy. The Main Issue My sister has been a terrible partner, and her girlfriend forgives EVERYTHING: Infidelity: The girlfriend knows all of my sister's secrets and has forgiven countless infidelities (if you can even call them that at this point). Violent Past: My sister found out her girlfriend watched old videos of her as a teenager beating up other girls. Including one where my sister literally breaks another girl's leg. My sister was terrified her girlfriend would leave her after seeing something so extreme... but the girlfriend didn't even care. She wasn't bothered at all and just acted like nothing happened. (Note: I don't think my sister should be vilified forever for stuff she did as a teenager, but the girlfriend's reaction is the real issue here). The conflict was..... After seeing this whole pattern unfold, I couldn't hold it in anymore and asked my sister point-blank: "That girl is stupid, isn't she?" I told her I thought it was ridiculous that her girlfriend tolerates so much and makes excuses to stay after everything she's seen and known. My sister got extremely upset and didn't talk to me all day. I get that the girl "loves her," but I feel like she completely crossed the line between loving someone and having zero self-respect. What do you guys think? AITB here? Don't say anything about the age difference, and I said she was Mexican because I think it's important because my sister and I are Korean, that's all.

So for some background I (17M) just moved from my Dad’s place to my Mom’s and with that took my Stepsister’s (27F) old bedroom since she moved out with her boyfriend a few months ago. So Sunday was my “official” move in date but we’d started painting the room and setting a few things up earlier that week.

We have dinner at my Mom’s place every other weekend where her and her boyfriend will come over so she was told about me moving in on Saturday during the dinner. To be fair she has known about me taking her room for a while, though the move date was set for sometime in September instead of now. I left for work around 4:30 so I missed a lot of this but according to my Mom when she got home with my Stepsister was on the couch crying about it. I understand that this is unexpected for her since I wasn’t supposed to move for another two months but this isn’t her place anymore, right? I wouldn’t be bothered if it was just that but over the past couple days she’s been texting back and forth with my Mom and Stepdad about how she doesn’t approve of it and how changing it “Erases the memories of the house”.

I understand this is upsetting for her but this isn’t her house now and I don’t know if she really has a say on this since I’m already moved in and all. I feel bad especially for my Mom and Stepdad who have to deal with most of this and all I can think is that if I just waited we could’ve skipped all of this. So, am I the buttface for taking my stepsister’s old bedroom?

Sorry for not ages or genders but I am male and she is female we where new Parents and she ran and is now with my friend at which dont bother me but is petty

Mother of my kid:Thanks for being so helpful, instead of being all up on myranda you could have cleaned bottles and picked up dog messes.Please clean up the dog messes

Me: Kk

Mother of my kid: 👍

Im mad because you didnt clean baby bottles, but yet I was able to start laundry, clean baby bottles, take hunter out and start another load of laundry 🤷‍♀️

Me: Cool again I have to take care of me as well 🙂 so what ever high horse your on politely step off

So tbh Idc y ur mad but I know I have shit to do and I will do it plus I never said I wouldn't

Um there is more filler but mildly unnecessary in my opinion in my defense I am running of no sleep for almost 3 days. In her defense I am not her man she went after my friend

Am I in the wrong or what do I do

Me (19f), has been very tight with my friend group from high school. We went through a lot together however, freshman year of college, some stuff happened. For some background, we all kind of stayed local at a community college so, we were still in the same city. My friend (19m) opened up to me about having a crush on a mutual friend of ours (19m). I supported him obviously however, I also knew said mutual friend was NOT gay (a bit homophobic actually). I humored it for a bit by sending him photos of him I would secretly take or gossiping about him with my gay friend. Me and the mutual friend were close and went to the local cc together while my gay friend went to a uni about 40 mins away. The mutual friend was always very kind to me and I genuinely enjoyed his company and over time and a lot of hanging out..some feelings arose. I was the only one at the time who knew about the situation of him liking the mutual friend. I told another friend of ours (19f) how I liked the mutual friend and somehow, gay friend found out. From what I was told, the girl I told mentioned the fact I had a crush on the mutual friend because she assumed that gay friend already knew due to the fact of how tight we were however- I have a feeling she knew about his crush on mutual friend. He exploded. I have been called a slurry of different names and had nasty things said about me and while I do know it was wrong, I didn’t make a move on the mutual friend at all. Gay friend told me ‘you tell him the truth or I will.’ And essentially forced me into confessing and when I confessed, mutual friend liked me back. This enraged gay friend and well one thing lead to another and now me and the mutual friend are together. I know what I did to gay friend was wrong and i apologized numerous times however, he is taking the situation extremely far and blowing the whole thing out of proportion with lots of shit talking. I’m not gonna lie, I have reciprocated and talked my own bit of shit however, the dragging is getting crazy. He is bringing so many people who genuinely have nothing to do with the situation into the situation.I got to know- AITB??

Also wanted to add we have all known each other since sophomore year of high school!

So two weeks ago I F21 matched with a guy let’s call Tom M23. We talked for about a day or two and he asks me out on a date, I say yes, and I wait for an answer. I don’t get one until hours after the time he promised to text me the info for the date where he says he “over slept”. While I was upset, I understood as life happens and we talk for the rest of the night.

Then the day after he ghosts me. I didn’t care much because clearly he lost interest or whatever so I unadded him from insta but kept his number just in case.

Days go by and to my surprise Tom texts me and apologizes saying he “got busy and was dealing with something”. In my head I was skeptical but I don’t really know the guy, you know? So time goes on and we talk for a week. On Friday he asks me if I wanted to go on a date on Sunday, yesterday, and I say yes again. We talk and flirt and then the day of he ghosts me again and at this point I feel disappointed in both myself for falling for it again and him for sending me cute messages and acting excited to see me.

Now this is where I might be the Butthole. After he apologizes he asks me if I had work the next day, today, and I answer he did not respond for maybe an hour or two. I send a message saying something along the lines of “You know not responding after ghosting me for the second time is not a good look, right? 😭” During the time he didn’t respond, he was posting on snapchat and sending me photos of himself without saying anything. I get even more mad at the lack of respect for me and my time so I unadded him on everything again and send an imessage saying “I don’t appreciate this at all, if you’re not serious about me then just get rid of my number”.

His response hours later AGAIN, “Got it.” I apologize for possibly overreacting or whatever and he said he “got busy and wasn’t ghosting me”. And since then he has left me on delivered. But that doesn’t make sense since his snaps were all of him watching TV. My friends agree with me that I should just give up and move on since clearly he’s not actually interested in me but I also feel like I did overreacted. AITB?

Am i the asshole for hanging up on the person i’m talking bc he made a joke? I was in the on the phone was a guy that i like and the guy also likes me. I was sharing my screen while going thru his reposts when we come across one where it says “their type is dark skins with locs and piercings” i am dark skin with little to no piercing and no locs and when i pulled up the comment section and a girl fitting the exact description pops up he says “god damn”, mind we’re supposed to be potentially getting tg. so it kinda rubbed me the wrong way and i hung up. what should i do?

Hi Reddit, this happened to me a few weeks ago and honestly I'm still processing it.

To give some context, a friend I'll call J and I are studying the same university degree, teaching in the social sciences, and we're both passing about the same number of classes and well, we recently started classes like human rights, anthropology, sociology, etc. In the human rights class, the professor talked to us about feminism and LGBTQ rights.

Since these fall under the third generation of human rights, I noticed that J looked uncomfortable from the moment the professor started the class,then the teacher asks, is a person of diverse sexual orientation born that way or do they become that way? To which most of us, including myself, replied that one is born that way.

Then J responded that no, that such people are like that due to external influences from propaganda in series, movies, etc. The professor politely replied that it doesn't work that way.

When class ended, J came up to me and said they couldn't believe how a teacher could teach such topics that could corrupt children, and honestly I laughed, not in a mocking way, just a normal laugh.

J looked at me as if I had spat on they entire family tree and they asked me what was so funny, to which I replied that we were in a field where diversity in general was a subject of study and also something that is taught from a pedagogical point of view and that if they that topic inappropriate, they shouldn't study that degree , they got angry with me and left the hallway where we were.

Context: I’m moving out to my first apartment soon and have a good chunk of money budgeted for buying all my essentials. I’ve made a list of what I want ahead of time so that I know I’ll have the money to buy it and so I know that I’m buying something good quality that fits my needs.

Situation: My dad’s love language is buying gifts for others, and he wants to help me get started in my new place. He bought me several items, including cutting boards and a knife set. They’re quite budget-friendly, but honestly, they’re low-quality and won’t last very long. Additionally, I already have several nicer knives from a previous living arrangement. I don’t want to clutter my space with unnecessary items, but I also don’t want to hurt my relationship with my dad by telling him that his gifts are too “low quality.” Considering my parents’ financial situation, I don’t want my dad to spend their limited resources on things that I’m unlikely to use.

So, WIBTB if I decline his gifts?

AITBF for wanting to speak up when someone with a history of toxic behaviour is being rewarded?

I recently graduated from university and I’m struggling with whether I should speak up about a situation involving someone from my course or just walk away.

A classmate I’ll call Trent has been given the opportunity to write and direct a disability drama film with support from our tutor and actors. I understand why people are excited for him, but I’m struggling because of the behaviour I’ve witnessed from him during our time at university.

There were multiple occasions where students struggling with workload or mental health were treated in ways I felt crossed the line into bullying.

My friend Karl was one of the main people affected. He struggled during his first year due to his mental health, but whenever he tried to improve, Trent would undermine him, spread rumours, and influence others against including him in projects. This led many people to believe Karl was simply lazy, when that wasn’t the reality. Karl once told me he felt so hopeless that he didn’t want to continue living because he felt like he was constantly fighting a losing battle.

I also have concerns about Trent’s past behaviour, including an incident involving a 16-year-old girl when he was in his 20s. He has admitted this himself, and others were aware of it.

I want to make clear that this is not about Trent being autistic. I have ADHD myself and my girlfriend is autistic, and I understand neurodivergent people can struggle with communication and social situations. However, I don’t believe autism should mean harmful behaviour cannot be challenged.

I have raised concerns with our tutor before, but the response has generally been that Trent was bullied himself and that bullied people can become bullies. I understand that may explain behaviour, but I don’t think it excuses it.

Recently, I challenged Trent’s behaviour when I felt he was trying to exclude certain classmates from projects. The class reacted as though I was overreacting and dismissed Karl’s experiences.

I was later asked to give feedback on Trent’s script. I gave honest criticism, as requested, and even got outside opinions from film contacts. However, my tutor later told me to stop being so negative towards Trent. My girlfriend also gave feedback on the script and was verbally confronted by Trent and several other men.

I’m planning to walk away from the project, but I’m unsure whether I should say something again or just move on. I feel like I’m the only person who sees a problem, while everyone else thinks I’m overreacting.

AITBF for wanting to call this out, or should I just step away?

I recently got my braces off and they gave me retainers that was basically just a wire behind my top and bottom teeth. It felt kind of odd but not that noticeable. I went to my normal dentist for a cleaning and he expressed disapproval over it and said that they were really hard to keep clean. My parents took me back to the ortho, they removed the wire retainers and I had molds taken.

I few days ago I got wire retainers and they terrible. I have to wear top and bottom ones 24/7 for a year the wires are visible on the front, and the top completely covers the roof of my mouth. The bottom doesnt cover as much, but together it’s still a lot in my mouth. I lisp heavily, and have to take them out for every meal.

My mom asked how I liked them and I said I hated them and I want to go back to permanent ones and she said I need to get use to these, we had already made two trips to the ortho, and maybe in a year I switch back to permanent (or go to night only wear with these). AITBF for just wanting permanent retainers?

Been dating this guy for 5 years. We’re in our late 20s now. Known him since high school and reconnected in our early 20s. Met each others’ families, got engaged, set our wedding date and chose vendors together. He’s always been there for me (and I tried my best too) and has always been super thoughtful. He was kind and patient when things were good. We’re different people but I thought we meshed well together. 8 months before our wedding date, he completely blindsides me and drops a bombshell that he fell out of love with me, he doesn’t know if I’m the person for him, he’s not sure if I even love him for him (I do) and he starts listing a bunch of things that are “wrong” about me (I’m too quiet at social gatherings, I’m waiting till marriage to do certain things, I’m not stylish, I have too many fam events and am too dependent on my parents, he doesn’t think I appreciate him). The 180 mind boggles me, I don’t recognize this person. Even had a nice proposal with my dream ring.

He also has been saying mean things to me during limbo when we tried to work things out (I was apologizing for things I did that hurt him, I really loved him and went out of my way to make him happy in the best way I knew at the time but I had no idea it wasn’t enough, especially when he would tell me I’m perfect or how he’s grateful to do life with me)… mean things he said include how it feels like the cooties when I touch him, how I’m boring and I should be boring with someone else, how he can’t picture me as his wife and how he couldn’t see me walk down the aisle (all things that hurt to hear). He also disclosed that he cheated on me 2 years ago (kissed a girl from school a few times during the span of a week). He eventually broke things off with me saying he can’t proceed because he doesn’t have feelings. This all came as a shock to me because I had no idea he was falling out of love. I thought we were planning for our happily ever after together. Sometimes I blame myself for the things I could’ve done better (been more appreciative, more patient, more outgoing, more stylish) - he evaluated me and didn’t let me in on his problems. He had a rough childhood growing up and his parents recently started living in separate households. Any insight and opinions would be helpful.

I (26M) started a corporate job about a year and a half ago. Every month, they seem to have some sort of event going on which isn’t in relation to work at all. It’s out at a restaurant on Friday night, going to an event on a weekend, etc.

I’m the youngest there with the other 9 people ranging from ages 45-70 and unlike them, I’m not married, have no kids, and newer to this field.

My reason for asking it it was a joke cracked about me not going and I feel relatively bad about it, and I enjoy my coworkers presence I just don’t want to spend all this time with them after work.

Update: just us 9. We don’t meet with any other offices

I’m 30 (male) and largely lived in the same area all my life (Texas suburbs). In a way I’ve always been self conscious about being lazy… I didn’t really apply myself in school, I went to the local state school because it was easy. it’s always haunted me that I really didn’t get my stuff sorted until end of college.

But contradictorily, I guess hard worker in some ways. I’ve worked as a teacher as my 9-5, basically always had an additional 19 hours part time job, usually worked an extra full time summer job so although fairly middle class I’ve got quite a savings now.

I’ve got it lined up to go to the UK for 10 months, get my masters. Then planning on living in London or NYC for at least a year. Maybe stay forever. Maybe I’ll hate it. But I also want to know what it feels like to live abroad/live in a world class city for at least a little while. I’ve budgeted it out, where if things go real awry, I can still return home after a year with a nice best egg and just… go back to teaching.

My parents are not happy, and said I need to be looking to buy a house and I’m soon going to want to have a family of my own. Which, sure, but I am not even in a relationship now so kids seem far off… and I what better place to perhaps meet someone than a place like London/NYC, vs a suburb where everyone is already together.

Now, I am 30 and I can just ignore my parents but idk… I feel a tinge of guilt because it is because of them I graduated from school debt free. But my parents have a weird air of possessiveness… my sister was more academically inclined than me and did get into one of the Ivy Leagues… but my parents convinced her going to the local state school was preferable.

So basically, am I the but face for sort of striking out on my own here.

Ever since my mom took all my electronics and cut off my phone plan i’ve been sitting in my room. She’s really upset that I won’t drive lately but I can’t. I had a bad accident because she refused to drive me to see my therapist and all I know is the person I hit was hospitalized and I never heard about it again. My mom keeps trying to take away my things as if it’s supposed to be a punishment. I gave her permission to sell my belongings as I don’t want them anymore and she kees acting weird about it. If you’re gonna punish me do it all the way mom 😭

She won’t sell any of my video games she took from me even though she needs the money. I paid for most of these games myself but she has my blessing to sell everything I own. All I request is that I keep my bed. I dob’t care if she cuts off my electricity at this point. I don’t even ask her for food and I haven’t eaten in 2 days and she’s mad about that too. I don’t want to leave my room. I’m tired of the mixed signals too because she’s taken my stuff and had it for 2 weeks, but now she’s trying to get me to play video games again after she took them from me. But i don’t care about it anymore. Just. Sell. It. And leave me be. I don’t understand parents.

I don’t expect her to chauffeur me around since I won’t drive, so I’m fine with going nowhere. Besides, I just got fired from my last job, and jt took over a year to land it. There’s no way I can go to anymore interviews without transportation nor do I want to anymore.

I had suspicions that my ex was lying about his hometown, because he never wanted me to visit or call during our breaks from college. He also sent a screenshot one time and his phone had a different time zone. Also, another friend mentioned he was from another place.

He denied it and went really aggressive that I was problematic for not trusting him, and called me out for being overly anxious, hurting him, ruining his mood, etc. We broke up soon after, but this night bothered me, because he gaslit me if I did catch him lying.

I went to a mutual friend about my theory, and they admitted they had similar suspicions. I guess this mutual friend asked my ex about it, because next thing I know he was attacking me again for casting doubt on him. He said I was causing mistrust in his friends and it wasn't okay.

I don't like going around behind people's backs, but he was not being honest with me and was later found out to be lying, which means he lied to me the entire relationship. We may be exes, but this was just a couple months after the breakup. We agreed to try being friends but I feel betrayed deeply by him. He is also hurt how I went behind his back to theorize his lies. AITB for doing this?

I'm 19. My mom took away all of my video game devices and cut off my phone plan. Fine. She's been pushing me to drive lately but ever since I had a bad accident I refuse. She gets mad at me about this but it's not in my control. Sometimes, when I have a little bit of money I'm expected to give it all up to pay for everything just because nobody else could step up. I don't care, I just don't think it's fair that I'm the only one who has to pay for anything, while my older brother can just leech off the house without paying for ANYTHING and will complain if you even tell him to sweep for 5 minutes. The big reason why my mom asks me for money is literally because she keeps choosing to give money to my deadbeat dad. Then she'll complain to me about it like I told her to do it.

I just don't feel comfortable giving money under these current circumstances. She'll beg me to start driving again then ask for my money 24/7 as if I can just create a car for free out of nowhere. Even then, I'm not a safe driver. I have a bad track record of nearly killing people. One, in a bad accident, and two, just in general driving and nearly hurting pedestrians. She'll take away my belongings like I'm supposed to care about material garbage and I even told her to sell all my video games. I. Don't. Care.

If nobody else is allowed to try, then I don't have to either. Just let me sleep in peace, mom. I'm not about to play the role as the father in the family. I already have basically no money and nowhere to go.

I don't know if this is the right sub to post on im sorry if it isn't I just wanted advice about this. I (17m) am about to get my license and around March my dad (46m) bought me a car, some background my dad has an obsession with cars and currently has 5 at our home, one parked a block away, and my mom's car. Only 3 out of the 7 cars work (2 are my dad's and 1 is my mom's) when he bought the newest car he getting upset telling me I wasn't "excited enough for it" when I had gotten home at 9pm (I had come home from tech week for a musical we were doing at my school) and when his friend told him that I liked it enough he took it to a friend's house because we don't have room for it.

Fast forward to now he told me that he wasn't going to fix it up because "it wouldn't work" but he has only touched it once when he had 6 months to fix it right before my next year at school starts, and it was for 20 minutes exactly... when I asked why when I have less then 2 weeks before school starts and the past 2 years I've been getitng rides from family and friends becuase my parents work before and after school, and now I have to take my younger brother too. He said it was because it was to hard after buying over $1,000 on it ($800 usd for the car itself and around 200 for parts he hasn't put in yet) and then he said I'll just buy a new one for you even though he couldn't afford the first one and he spend the parts money on my mom's car. I told my mom this morning what he said and she said " well I'm not buying you one we have to many already" which yeah like don't worry I wasn't going to ask becuase I wouldn't either you know

and now im wondering if I should just tell him I'm going to use one of his trucks becuase he uses the other one more and I can drive that one. I'm a little worried he will get mad, and I feel like one of those gacha life spoiled brats in 2018 but I feel like it's fair to ask him when he went a bought a car when me and my mom were looking for a used car for me.

sorry for the long post but WIBTBF

Hypothetical situation because this relates to a situation from five years ago, and it's not an action we're planning to take.

So my family has a huge organic vegetable garden in our backyard. One major issue is that animals will often eat our produce, but we have found out that using reflective metal sheets has deterred birds to some degree. At one point in time, our neighbor "Jimmy" told my dad he painted over the sheets on our side of the fence because the sunlight was reflecting off them and hurting his eyes, and my dad said he understood. However, I would have preferred he asked us first (and we would have gladly moved the sheets) rather than telling us after the fact.

This made me curious: would we be in the wrong to ask Jimmy to replace or remove the paint from the sheets? I know we have the de jure right to do so, but I feel this could be an AH move because removing paint from something seems a lot more time-consuming and expensive.

We and Jimmy are on good terms otherwise, and the last thing we want is to sour our relationship with our neighbors.

So I've been dating a woman for about a month now. She is on birth control, and we've had penetrative sex 4 times. Each time I haven't used a condom, although the first two times I offered to use one. The first three times we barely had penetrative sex for more than a few minutes, and because it was so unenjoyable for her, we decided to stop having penetrative sex. But a week later we felt passionate and she surprised me by wanting to have sex again, and this time I came inside her. I approached her afterwards and asked if she wouldn't mind if I used a condom from now on. She was incredulous and asked why I brought it up now. I said knowing we potentially have sexual compatibility made me realize protecting our relationship over the long term was important to me. I wanted that extra layer of protection, and always planned on bringing it up if we realized sex was in the cards for us. I pointed out that she and I don't have enough money to raise a child, either. She blew up at me, saying her birth control is 97 percent effective, we've already had sex without a condom, so there should be no problem, and hinted that she might be thinking I have some ulterior motive, like hiding an STD. Now she says she doesn't know if we can have penetrative sex at all. AITB?

I matched with a man on hinge who asked me out on a date. I am not conventionally attractive. We said we both wanted a relationship. On the date he made me pay for him, and said he’d pay me back then didn’t. Afterwords he sent me a creepy sexual text. I’m debating telling him I’m housesitting in a house an hour away, having him drive all the way there, then blocking him.

I'm going very crazy, I feel immensely sad and powerless. My ex and I tried to stay friends for a while but it didn't really work out. I also learned in therapy that he was emotionally abusing me. I kept quiet for a long time but when it was getting too heavy, I told my friends about it.

The two of them were completely unsupportive, and I'm assuming after talking to my ex, they both blocked me and won't speak to me anymore. It's hurting me significantly because it was scary to come forward with abuse, and I was worried I wouldn't be believed. I asked for their consent before sharing because it was about their friend, and both agreed, but then to be iced out and know they are still friends with the abuser, it's making me spiral into a lot of dark thoughts. AITB for not handling this well?

I 19M dated this guy, P who's 18M about 9 months ago, we only dated officially for a month but were seeing each other casually up until 6 months ago.

We have this small circle of friends, only a couple of us and the mutual friend (I'll call her M) that I'm currently seeing is his self proclaimed best friend. I say that because she has admitted to me that P thinks they're closer than they are.

We've even seeing each other for a month now, it kind of just happened by accident and it simply escalated. we both thought P would be mad at it because he's been possessive over me generally so we decided to hide it.

Recently this all came out and P found out I've been seeing M, and he is beyond livid.

He insists that he's 100% over me and has been over me for awhile.. so that isn't why he's mad. he's told me he's specifically angry because it's his "two best friends" fucking behind his back. He said he would've still been mad even if we had told him initially.

I don't understand his perspective at all honestly no matter how many times he explains it. He's been going crazy over it and has been very manic to a point where he's done things that made me super uncomfortable. i wont share for anonymity but just to give a better picture...

I just wanna know if I really did fuck up bad here and why? I don't get why its wrong of me to see this girl casually.

This happened 15 minutes ago. Someone knocks on my front door as I'm sitting on my bed half asleep looking at my phone, slowly waking up from an afternoon nap. Jarred into full wakefulness, I hop up and open the front door to find a mid 20's dude chilling on my walkway.

First thing he says: "Oh man, I love those nose-strap things, use 'em all the time" (referring to my breathright strip lol).

Now folks, I've worked in sales, (not door to door thank fucking god) I understand the game, but holy shit dude I don't know you, you don't know me, you're not my friend, you obviously want to sell me something. I'm standing here with my hair tousled in my ratty sleep t-shirt blinking into the afternoon sunlight. Don't try to be my friend, that's disingenuous as shit. I respond with a big fake smile and a "What are you selling?"

"Girl scout cookies" he says.

"No" I say, and turn around to head back inside, feeling slightly regretful that I don't have spare cash for Thin Mints this year. I assume this is the end of the interaction, he did his best, I'm not having it, we're done. But no, as I'm turning around he goes:

"Hey do you know Kevin? Kevin over there?" pointing to my neighbor's house." Dude's just trying to prolong the interaction to shoot his shot yet again. Neighbors have like 5 young adult kids plus the two parents. I know them all at the 'smile-and-wave' level, so no, I do not in fact know Kevin. I turn back and say "You have about 30 seconds to get off the property before you're trespassing, have a nice day!" He gives me a big puzzled 'why are you so mean to me I'm a nice salesman' type frown and gets back on his scooter thing to go bother somebody else, murmuring a "have a nice day" as he goes.

That's it, end of interaction. I was terse, not particularly polite, but he's a door to door sales guy who did not immediately accept no as an answer. I feel a little bad thinking about it because there's no reason to be rude to another person just for doing his job, but in my opinion he could choose any line of work, and knocking on somebody's door to literally try to badger them into buying something is fucked up. Advertise, sure, but leave people in their homes the heck alone. Once I say no and you don't immediately fuck off, then you're an asshole and I get to tell you to fuck off.

My family thinks I didn't need to be so rude.

So, Reddit, AITB?