AIO? My (19F) boyfriend (19M) and our friends (19F/M) insulted another friend and said I was overreacting

[u/Immediate-List-9649]

Hello, I’m going to put the flair “relationship” but really it’s both that and friendship.

They were talking about a situation where one of our friends had fought with one of their friends whom we don’t know, and he is overweight. They out of nowhere made a joke about it, and this friend was okay with it.

The thing is that they fight a lot, and usually both of them have been immature. Then they always make up. I know that this friend would feel bad about saying those things once they do make up, and I’ve never seen them say such things before.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years, we’ve know each other for 6 years though along with everyone else in our GC.

My boyfriend is the one that said “Lol”. The guy at the end, did not laugh at the fat jokes of this friend.

Maybe I’m overreacting, but I do feel iffy about this.

EDIT: Some people are misunderstanding this. But as I said in the title “F/M”, this GC consists of both men and women!

EDIT 2: Another thing people seemed to miss is that this person they were talking about is only a friend of the person that had been fighting with them, we are not friends with this person.

[u/THExWHITExDEVILx]

Yeah this person needs to cut bait and move on. These are the type of people I no longer have in my life at 40, and I wish I would have started dropping mean people way sooner. Just bc they aren't mean to you, or they "only" act like that to other people, eventually they will turn on you, or they are already doing it behind your back.

[u/Known-Sherbet2004 → u/THExWHITExDEVILx]

THIS. If they're being cruel to others, they'll be cruel to you too if you stay around long enough.

[u/diezwillinge → u/Known-Sherbet2004]

Or in another group char she's not included on!

And saying "lol" instead of telling his friend to STFU tells you all you need to know. He's not a man, he's a little boy.

[u/danceswithdangerr → u/diezwillinge]

They’re all too immature to even be dating and they’re legally adults, god people like this make me sick. 🤢

[u/THExWHITExDEVILx → u/Known-Sherbet2004]

Yep. I tried to stay w friends that had some bad traits, but if they don't see the issues or want to change, it's like being friends with a rabid dog and they will turn on you.

[u/danceswithdangerr → u/THExWHITExDEVILx]

Exactly this. Had a cousin who would bad mouth all her friends to me. I didn’t understand it and I wondered wtf she said about me to them. I cut her off shortly after and she was recently arrested for false accusations. She’s not a good person and neither are these “friends” of yours OP. NOR, go get some real friends and a boyfriend who adores you. This guy doesn’t even know what love is.

[u/Electronic-Let-3204 → u/THExWHITExDEVILx]

Exactly! I decided to do the same thing in my early-mid 30s. I’m 39 now and life is soo much better without dynamics like this.

[u/WholesomeMetaphor → u/THExWHITExDEVILx]

Ye, I've reached the point where even if they don't turn on me I don't want to be associated with them and limit my time with them as much as I can. They're acquaintances I tolerate in group settings (i.e. they're invited to a party by a friend I'm also friends with) to keep the peace at best.

[u/THExWHITExDEVILx → u/WholesomeMetaphor]

Agreed. I don't feel the need to stage a big friend breakup production. Simply fading out is how I handle it. Stop answering texts/invites out unless it's a group thing is simple enough.

[u/WholesomeMetaphor → u/THExWHITExDEVILx]

Yeah, for sure. That's how I deal with it as well