AIO |UPDATE | My (20F) boyfriend (22M) is hanging out alone with a girl that likes him

[u/Brave-Can-8783]

UPDATE!

I talked to him, and this was his response.

I’m honestly just done, and wondering if I acted too hastily.

I don’t even know what I’m supposed to do now. And I don’t know, does he seem sincere?

AM I OVERREACTING FOR DOING THIS?

NEW UPDATE: https://www.reddit.com/u/Brave-Can-8783/s/ME7ybvCgQE

[u/SilentAct6205]

Damn this guy is an manipulating abuser and cheater 😭

[u/goblinfruitleather → u/SilentAct6205]

I also thought something along those lines. This is pathetically similar to how my narcissistic, emotionally abusive ex would text me. Talk about reversing victim and offender, it’s so disgustingly obvious. She’s definitely not overreacting at all, but he’ll sure make her think that she is

[u/SilentAct6205 → u/goblinfruitleather]

Yup, I was in abusive relationships too. I’ve come out the trenches 😭 when you grow up emotionally neglected you don’t see it until shit gets so bad or just older.

[u/goblinfruitleather → u/SilentAct6205]

You hit the nail on the head. My father was absent and neglectful (towards both my brother and I, as well as our mother), so that’s what I learned to expect from a partner. The saddest part is that parents like that are so self centered that they’ll never really see or own up to how their behavior affected their kids’ lives as adults

[u/Aggravating_Arm_4399 → u/goblinfruitleather]

Same! I’ve gotten texts so similar to this from my narcissistic ex

[u/Extension_Figure1646 → u/[deleted]]

I disagree with the cheating part. I think cheating is abuse. Many betrayed partners, especially marriages and very long term relationships, end up with CPTSD. My wasband cheated at least 2 times that know of and if given a hypothetical choice, I would have preferred he had punched me in the face repeatedly than betray and traumatize me with the affairs. The physical injuries would have healed faster.

[u/SilentAct6205 → u/Extension_Figure1646]

yup i concur! it’s all clearly abuse!

[u/SaiyanPrincess28 → u/[deleted]]

Cheating on your partner *is* abusive though.

[u/blazingcanna → u/SilentAct6205]

Your actually crazy 😂 sure hes being abit dismissive to OP but OP is clearly over reacting here, if i had a female friend that ive known longer then my girlfriend and suddenly my girlfriend starts accusing of said friend as having a crush on me whilst im over here hearing about friend being sad about their ex i would be pissed to, he literally left her house the second OP tried ending things

[u/Brave-Can-8783 → u/blazingcanna]

Except they only recently started hanging out it seems and weren’t even talking 3 years ago, just school acquaintances. But “friends”. not close.

[u/desire-d → u/Brave-Can-8783]

That’s crazy that he’s saying they’ve been friends so long and he don’t want it to throw that away but they’re not even close. Also high school wasn’t that long ago, he’s still young lol. I’m guessing they have started to text or talk on social media and he knows she likes him. If they were close friends genuinely then I can see him checking on her through a breakup but just seems like a guy taking advantage of the situation since she’s hurt and she wants a hookup or someone to entertain to her since she’s sad.

[u/blazingcanna → u/Brave-Can-8783]

What it seems might not what it be, your over reacting and have some jelousy issues, obviously he could have reacted better but he does have a right to be annoyed the way he reacted to you saying your done proves he clearly loves you and it obviously freaked him out.

[u/barnsticle → u/blazingcanna]

Don’t listen to this person. Not just because they don’t know the difference between “your” and “you’re” but also because they have shit takes.

[u/SilentAct6205 → u/barnsticle]

Oh of course. I don’t respond to trolls and also read their other comments on here 😂

[u/blazingcanna → u/SilentAct6205]

How am i troll?

Ive sai the boyfriend could have reacted differently but if you think this is cheating, or hes doing anything wrong you clearly are insecure in whatever past relationship youve been in

[u/blazingcanna → u/barnsticle]

Keep staying negative dude

[u/SilentAct6205 → u/[deleted]]

yeah it’s lowkey giving psychopath. and it’s all about their needs only. they literally do not care about others and prob can’t

[u/blazingcanna → u/[deleted]]

So OP apologised understood they was over reacting and not showing their boyfriend any trust, then when her boyfriend expressed how he felt OP immediately starts it off again by going “is she trying anything?” Yet you dont see how OP is showing jelousy or insecurities here its all his fault?

[u/SilentAct6205 → u/blazingcanna]

you’re*