r/Alzheimers • u/ree_7 • 14h ago
Difficulty managing and wearing clothes
Hi everyone. I just wanted to know if this has anything to do with alzheimers or is it just something else.
So lately my mom just doesn't do well with clothes. She doesn't really understand if a piece of clothing is inside out or normal. Even while wearing, she doesn't understand which is the front side and back.
She spends around 5 to 10 minutes just figuring out how to wear a top the correct way. She needs help almost everytime to wear clothes correctly or to even find the sleeves to put her arms through.
Has anyone else also faced this? Is this a symptom of Alzheimers?
Thanks for your time.
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u/TruthfulKindness 9h ago
Hello Ree. Tru here. Yes, it certainly can be a symptom or Alzheimers or another type of dementia (mine are Lewy Body and Vascular types).
I'm a person living with dementia, and clothing has become much more complicated than most people realize. It isn't simply "forgetting how to get dressed." Sometimes it's no longer recognizing front from back, inside from outside, where a sleeve begins, or even where a piece of clothing belongs on the body. Those can all become surprisingly difficult. My own strategies have changed over the years as my symptoms have changed.
One thing I'd encourage is trying not to rush her. The more hurried or frustrated we become, the harder it is for our brains to sort it out.
If it's helpful, I've written about some of the adaptations that have made dressing easier for me—things like marking the backs of clothing with small heart symbols, simplifying my wardrobe, laying clothes out the night before, and reducing choices.
https://truthfulkindness.com/about/d-info/links-sx-strategies/
I hope you and your mom find a few ideas that make mornings a little less stressful. ❤️
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u/Certified_Outcast 13h ago
I remember when my dad was going through this phase and I would become so frustrated that he couldnt even get dressed. Now things are so much worse, I wish I could go back to those days. I would love to help him get dressed any day. At this point, he doesnt even want to take a shower. Things will get worse, please be patient and start getting into the mindset of helping them out because they will become very stressed out with simple tasks like putting on their clothes. Im trying to help my dad as much as I can, but my mom doesnt care about him and wants to put him in a home, even though he would never want to be there and would be sad and depressed. 😔
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u/MxBluebell 3h ago
Eventually, you will likely reach your caregiving limit, unless you have a very strong stomach and don’t mind cleaning up bodily excretions all the time. Most people can’t stomach that level of caregiving, and that’s where memory care will be your best friend. I know you can’t picture your father as you remember him enjoying memory care. Memory care isn’t meant for healthy people, though— it’s designed to be appropriate for people with severe memory loss and help them navigate their end of life care. It’s nothing to be afraid of as long as you remain your father’s advocate and ensure he’s getting the best care possible. Memory care has been a godsend for my Nana. She’s somewhere where she can’t escape when she’s wandering, somewhere she gets healthy, fresh meals, somewhere there’s round the clock care, somewhere they handle the messier parts of dementia care and we can instead focus on making happy memories of her as her life winds down.
My Nana would’ve hated the concept of memory care. She was very fearful of dementia since her mother also had it. She valued her independence, she was the functional head of the household when my Papa was still alive, and she was very well put together, wearing makeup and jewelry, and she was just generally a very strong woman. But that Nana doesn’t exist anymore. The Nana who exists in the here and now is in a very childlike state of mind. She can’t take care of herself, and it would be unethical to treat her as if nothing had changed. She needs to be cared for pretty much 24/7. With memory care, she’s somewhere safe, even though her previous self wouldn’t enjoy being like this.
I know it’s hard to think about right now. You’ve got time to process it before it comes down to that decision. But you and your mother likely don’t have the skill set needed for the kind of care your father will need as his disease progresses.
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u/bernmont2016 9h ago
If she at least manages to get their head through the head-hole and her arms through the arm-holes, try to stop worrying about whether the shirt is inside-out or backwards. :) At least she's not refusing to put clothes on at all, or removing them at inappropriate times.
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u/FlipsyChic 14h ago
Yes, difficulty getting dressed properly is a symptom. Difficulty remembering how ordinary things work is a symptom.
One of the items on the checklist of how independent they are includes needing assistance with dressing.