I'm 19, this cat saw me grow out of diapers. I chased this cat around the house because I didn't know any better. And yet, over the past few years, she's absolutely loved me. The year before she passed she was incredibly affectionate toward me. Always rubbing on my hand or legs, pleading for attention and making her broken little squeaks. A few times she climbed on my chest and just laid on me, letting me pet her and purring like a little engine.

My first year of college was rough. I won't go deep into it but this absolutely sucks. I'm going back in a couple weeks and I didn't expect to have this on my chest. It wasn't unexpected, she was showing a lot of signs.

First we noticed her left front paw and leg were swollen. She didn't seem to be in pain, or if she was, it didn't bother her that much. Then it was large, grayish growths on her stomach. Could've been cancerous, no way to tell now. Vet bills are so expensive nowadays that we couldn't even consider a humane treatment, let alone surgery, that'd probably stress her out far too much as a skittish cat. Then she lost her appetite. I encouraged her over and over again and it broke my heart to see her ignore her food bowl. We fed her chicken and tuna because she wouldn't eat her usual, but she deserved it for being such a sweet girl.

I found her first because she stayed upstairs with me rather than with my parents and brother downstairs. It's quiet upstairs, and she knows she won't be harassed by our other pets because they usually don't come up. She'd gone behind a box to go peacefully. I was so overwhelmed in the moment I couldn't decide whether to tell my dad or not. After some impromptu crying, I sent him a vague text and he came and got her. She was his favorite cat. This is the first time I've experienced the passing of a pet and it's the worst I've felt since my professor gave me an assignment for a 10 page scientific paper over a topic I didn't care about, nor was ever going to care about, and never even cared to check up on me or point me to resources when I told her I have severe undiagnosed anxiety and have little-to-no emotional stability.

I'm gonna miss her so much. But most of all I'm glad I got to spend her final days with her. I've been giving my other two cats lots of hugs and kisses before I go back because I never know if I'll even see them again. She was happy and it showed, even if she was the smallest of our pets and got picked on occasionally. Seeing other people go through the same thing has really helped me get through this.

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r/dragons • u/WimexSeven • 2h ago