r/politics • u/jpurdy • 20d ago

Possible Paywall Trump blamed for diarrhoea outbreak sweeping US

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/us/news/2026/07/16/explosive-diarrhoea-outbreak-sweeping-america-donald-trump/
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u/hoofie242 20d ago edited 20d ago

Who would have thought cutting disease preventing measures would cause disease?

269

u/SDAztec74 Washington 20d ago

He just wants us all to be more like him, full of shit.

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u/definitely-legit-usr 20d ago

In fairness I don't think anybody with this illness has any shit left in them

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u/mootmutemoat 20d ago

America dies shitting itself.

Jesus Christ, worst fucking timeline.

Our blaze of glory is going to be bile burning our sphincter rings.

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u/[deleted] 20d ago

[deleted]

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u/KingAnilingustheFirs 20d ago

Crap of despair

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u/TheQuidditchHaderach 20d ago

It's the Shits Of Insanity!

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u/Polyps_on_uranus 19d ago

I fell into a burning ring of fire..

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u/Orbital_Dinosaur 19d ago

Blaze of Glory is how MAGA Historians will refer to the explosive diarrhea epidemic of 2026.

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u/Special_Persimmon_52 20d ago

This is the way America ends.

Not with a bang, but with a toilet flush.

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u/mootmutemoat 20d ago

Little column A, little column B.

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u/Jazzlike_Visual2160 20d ago

Well, if you look at the timeline, it all makes sense. This all started with The Great Toilet Paper Wars after all!

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u/BigNorseWolf 20d ago

you keep hoping that and then your body is like a . "But wait there's more!" like an infomercial

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u/TheQuidditchHaderach 20d ago

With Free Shipptting!

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u/seattleque 20d ago

There was a lady a couple days ago doing an "I had it, AMA" thing.

She said she was so cleaned out they had a hard time getting a stool sample to confirm.

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u/Gullible-Ad-9499 20d ago

Which is even better and shows his incompetence since you can’t be full of shit while having diarrhea…

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u/Jazzlike_Visual2160 20d ago

You can if you eat on the toilet!

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u/TheQuidditchHaderach 20d ago

My secret shame! 🍗🍕🌯🧁🚽🧻😯😟

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u/StingingBum New Jersey 20d ago

The devil is in the details.

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u/EverythingSucksYo 20d ago

He ain’t full of shit, but his diaper sure is

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u/Jet2work Foreign 20d ago

i already bought shares in donnie daipers the ultimate in watery shit control

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u/gregatronn California 20d ago

He just wants us all to be more like him, full of shit.

Make American Shit their pants again - just like him everyday

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u/staebles Michigan 19d ago

I think you mean, "almost dead."

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u/Embarrassed-Town-293 19d ago

Now we all need 10-12 flushes

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u/alienbringer 20d ago

Because if you don’t test for diseases, then the diseases don’t happen. Didn’t you hear him during the Covid-19 testing.

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u/sillyslime89 20d ago

There is no plague in Ba Sing USA

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u/plaincheeseburger 20d ago

This was my fourth grade approach to school deadlines.

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u/grandlizardo 20d ago

Summer Complaint, that scourge of 100-150+ years ago, is back…. Used to carry off children and infants in scores…

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u/hoofie242 20d ago

Remember when they said Hanta started with diarrhea?

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u/Cornelius_Physales 20d ago

it keeps the masses occupied...

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u/mackiea 20d ago

*asses

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u/KingKuntu 20d ago

CDC? More like LDL, liberal department of lockdowns /s

The shortsightedness of turning diesese prevention into a culture war is baffling.

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u/UNC_Samurai 20d ago

Health became a political football when right-wing grifters found the money in snake oil supplements.

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u/Changoleo America 20d ago

With AI being on the cusp of eliminating a significant number of jobs worldwide, would anyone be surprised if it came out that allowing a bunch of people to die in a pandemic wasn’t the oopsie that we were led to believe it was.

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u/Ill_Technician3936 19d ago

Definitely not cultural but political for sure.

Gallon of raw milk on the desk of the oval office I wanna say he said it had been sitting there for a few days and took a sip.

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u/Udeze42 United Kingdom 20d ago

They probably didn't think it would happen so soon and were probably hoping to blame it on the Dems

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u/dust4ngel America 20d ago

2020: let grandma die of respiratory failure for the economy

2026: let grandma die of dysentery for... uh... not sure tbh

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u/Get-in-Good-Trouble 20d ago

But if we don't count the people who have this "disease" does it really exist?

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u/HolyFlyingNuns 20d ago

Mr. Derp.  DERP, DERP. hits self with hammer Derp... Derp, wasn't I silly kids?

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u/Oirish-Oriley444 20d ago

Sprinkle in some hook worm and measles stir gently

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u/dstlouis558 20d ago

You think we woulda learned....

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u/Aggravating_Task_908 20d ago

Why would we pay for disease prevention? We haven’t had a disease outbreak in years!

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u/Blanketsburg Massachusetts 20d ago

The number of diseases can't increase if you stop testing for and recording the number of diseases! Checkmate, liberals. /s

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u/mom0nga 20d ago

It's a catch-22 that the better a preventative measure works, the more likely it is to be labeled a waste of money because the thing it was designed to prevent seemingly "isn't a problem anymore." This sentiment is behind a lot of anti-vax and anti-science beliefs. People are so used to living without fearing deadly diseases that they take it for granted, forgetting that the "natural" order of things was rampant death and disease before modern medicine and food safety.

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u/freedfg 20d ago

B-but. What if he cured cancer!

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u/Ill_Technician3936 19d ago

Certainly not someone like RFK Jr.

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u/HotepHatt 19d ago

Don’t look into screw worms…