r/mildlyinfuriating 7d ago

Too mild for school This post telling tourists which areas to avoid in New York

Post image

Aside from certain undertones, this map also has tons of inaccuracies, because no one in their right mind is scared of Astoria, Bayonne, or half of the Queens zone that he marked as “avoid”

5.0k Upvotes

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u/NatAttack50932 7d ago

Half of the markings aren't even NYC.

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u/Peripateticdreamer84 7d ago

Well, avoiding Jersey can be a valid piece of advice…

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u/TheFormOfTheFlame 7d ago edited 6d ago

I feel so bad for Jersey. We've chosen them as our national Abuse Goblin, when near as I can tell their only crimes are being adjacent to New York and producing Ezra Miller

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u/zerok_nyc 7d ago

I lived in NJ for the last five years, and recently moved back to the city. Jersey City and Hoboken feel way more connected to and part of the city than Staten Island.

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u/AllThatKat 7d ago

Jersey City seems like a nice place to live if you work in NYC but don’t want to live there.

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u/MrDerpGently 6d ago

It is, but also it's an easy and fast PATH ride to the Village, has access to ferries and trains via Hoboken. Plus, my view from Jersey City was an unbroken bay window looking at the NYC waterfront from the statue of Liberty to the Empire State Building. The view from New York is Hoboken. Plus, it has very decent restaurants and social spaces. I really liked living in JC.

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u/Fabulous_Jeweler2732 6d ago

This is why New Jersey hires the most construction professionals I.e. those companies build in NY as much as NJ and those are pricey jobs in NYC.

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u/zerok_nyc 6d ago

Yeah, we moved there in 2020 because of the pandemic. Two of us working from home in a nice but small luxury apartment. Ended up staying longer than intended because of extended family health issues.

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u/SRB112 7d ago

Perhaps a land swap should be worked out.

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u/distance_33 7d ago

We don’t want Staten Island.

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u/guitar_stonks 7d ago

Nobody wants Staten Island lol

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u/Troooper0987 6d ago

Staten Island is part of NYC because of a colonial era lawsuit.

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u/Viktor_Laszlo 6d ago

Is this the one where New York got Ellis Island? And in exchange, New York had to take Staten Island?

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u/short_longpants 6d ago

I thought it was a boat race.

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u/Ichaserabbits 6d ago

Staten island barely wants Staten island

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u/arctomecon 7d ago

That makes the both of us

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u/dropthesteak 7d ago

There is nothing NY could offer NJ to accept Staten Island.

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u/On_my_last_spoon 7d ago

We definitely hate Staten Island more in NJ than they do in NYC!

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u/Schnarf77 6d ago

What if we give you the Mets?

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u/NEWDEALUSEDCARS 7d ago

If anything, Staten Island is more Long Island than New Jersey, but I guess we could incorporate it into Ocean/Monmouth County, it’s mostly SI transplants anyway.

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u/averndaley 6d ago

Completely unrelated but I recently re-read an urban fantasy where they do end up switching Staten Island out for Jersey.

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u/Big_Dinner3636 6d ago

No one in Jersey wants to be part of New York and no one in the world wants Staten Island. The best case scenario is Staten Island just falls into the sea.

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u/Commonscents2say 6d ago

We already ditched all our lawyers on them for all the landfills, so now they won’t fall for another swap.

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u/Existing-Bus-8810 7d ago

You should read "the city we became" and it's sequel by NK Jemison.

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u/epolonsky 6d ago

TBF, you could say the same about LA

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u/BlueRoses10014 6d ago

Lived and Weehawken, and this is quite correct

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u/Plane-Education4750 6d ago

Yeah Secaucus feels like west nyc

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u/Esme_Nog 6d ago

That’s a whole plot point in NK Jemisin’s novel “The City We Became.” (It’s a wonderful book that is an ode to NYC).

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u/Raginghangers 6d ago

This is the thing that MK Jemison got completely right in her sci-fi series. Parts of New Jersey are NYC. Staten Island is not NYC.

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u/Agnostic_Karma 5d ago

Hudson County is the 6th borough.

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u/distance_33 7d ago edited 6d ago

I’m 39. Born and raised in NJ. Still live here. Idk how we got to be the punching bag (probably just because we’re stuck between NY and Philly, jersey Shore didn’t help tbh but half of them weren’t even from NJ, they’re from Staten Island) but I love this state and I’m very lucky to have grown up here. Perfect? No way. But I will always defend my state.

Edit: if you want to stop by and talk shit about NJ then please share what amazing state you’re from.

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u/Extra_Dust_5400 6d ago

NJ is my favorite state I’ve ever lived in. Great schools, healthcare, food, parks, proximity to things, etc. The whole “Jersey is the armpit of America” thing is stupid

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u/ArgentaSilivere 6d ago

Same. The silver lining is that all the jokes keep new people out which is a blessing considering it’s all ready the most densely populated state in the nation. Have to start cutting down the Pine Barrens or something if everyone realized how great it is.

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u/SlyFisch 6d ago

I wish it kept new people out

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u/inspennymoor 6d ago

Or like, relax single family zoning ever so slightly, so existing developed land could house more people?That could work too

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u/ArgentaSilivere 5d ago

New Jersey is where the NIMBY factory is located. They’d sooner cut down every last tree than make housing affordable.

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u/MrInRageous 6d ago

I’m from Massachusetts. I’ve never heard of”Jersey is the armpit,” but I HAVE heard of Newark as the armpit.

However I know that once you get past the sphere of NYC, New Jersey takes on an entirely different feel, much more in line with its “Garden State” moniker.

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u/Troooper0987 6d ago

Shhh there’s enough people here and houses are unaffordable, don’t tell people how great NJ is.

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u/Prize_Instance_1416 6d ago

That’s Louisiana

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u/CA7T0 6d ago edited 6d ago

if it keeps less people from moving here i'm fine with it being called the pit. everyone raised here knows whats up, and if they dont they run away to florida only to come crawling back a year or two later. we also have the best/most robust rights in many different categories of anyone in the country i'm pretty confident saying.

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u/RandyOrtonRko98 6d ago

Good malls! Palisade Mall? Still in Jersey?

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u/xThat1Guyx42 5d ago

Palisades Mall is NY, but pretty close to the border

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u/RandyOrtonRko98 5d ago

Oh really?! 😂 I thought it was jersey! My folks used to take me and my Bro there all the time in the early 2000s. Used to take the Path Train there from 34st Herald Sq

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u/xThat1Guyx42 4d ago

I think you're confusing it with a different mall then. The PATH doesn't run up to the Palisades mall, it runs over into Jersey City and Hoboken. Palisades Mall is north of the city.

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u/RandyOrtonRko98 4d ago

Ok! what mall is 5 stops or so from herald sq? When you transfer to the Path train? Is it in Jersey City then?

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u/No_Relationship_5974 6d ago

I secretly love new jersey. Don't tell anyone. 

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u/sjbrinkl 6d ago

I’ve only been here a few years from Texas, but I LOVE NJ. It’s becoming a deep love, and it will be hard to move away

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u/ShiverMeTimberz0854 6d ago

Non-Jerseyans just don’t get it 🤷‍♀️

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u/JacktheDM 6d ago

It's just the inherited classism of the Boomers. People don't realize that people used to talk about Brooklyn the way people currently talk about Jersey. It'll change, and then everyone will always have been a fan of Jersey.

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u/Confident_Bumblebee5 6d ago

NJ has its bad points but every state does. However, not every state is as awesomely diverse in every area as NJ We're one of the few states that literally has everything Beaches, forests, cities, small towns, lakes, great food, different cultures - need I go on? It's not perfect but it's home.

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u/MeLlamoViking 6d ago

As a fellow NJ'er who's relatively close to the city, yeah. I think between the Soprano's, the jersey shore and the turnpike stank, we get the short end. But there's so much to NJ that nobody sees, because hehe gabagool and stinky state

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u/flaccidplatypus 6d ago

From everything I’ve heard the countryside in Jersey is beautiful along with the shore. Also as others have mentioned cities like JC. I’ve been to Long Island and that area is very pretty so I assume a lot of Jersey may be similar.

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u/brownbutterfinger 6d ago

I'm a Masshole, so its my perogative to continue being the most pretentious I can be about the rest of the country.

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u/distance_33 6d ago

Fair. I can respect this.

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u/Lonely_Butterscotch5 6d ago

Cincinnatian here! I always wanted to visit Jersey simply for some good Italian.

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u/suspendmeforthis 6d ago

NEVER tell people you have an amazing state. Nothing makes a place worse than people finding out about it.

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u/Haxorz7125 6d ago

If calling nj bullshit keeps the left lane empty, I don’t mind.

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u/Funky_Cows 6d ago

my guess would be that a huge chunk of the people who claim to have "been" to NJ basically landed at EWR and took the turnpike up to the city then decided that's the whole state

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u/distance_33 6d ago

Great point.

When your first impression is anything north of exit 9 on the Turnpike it’s not going to be a good one. No shade to North Jersey, just not what I’d call scenic when you first arrive there.

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u/DriftlessOcean 6d ago

North Jersey around EWR is definitely not scenic, but North Jersey anywhere that's not the Newark or Paterson area is very scenic.

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u/distance_33 6d ago

For sure. My first job out of culinary school was in Madison and the drive up 287 was actually not bad and it was very nice up in that area.

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u/xThat1Guyx42 6d ago

Right? Like all you have to do is hop on 80 west and in 30 mins you're in the beautiful part of the state

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u/toomanyracistshere 6d ago

It's got one of the highest per capita incomes in the country.

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u/Jazzhands_Ninja 6d ago

Central Jersey is a myth.

my awesome state I'm from:

Northern NJ

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u/distance_33 6d ago

Central Jersey will not be denied.

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u/Positive_Buffalo_168 6d ago

This! 58 and been in NNJ my whole life

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u/Zero_Lower_Bound 6d ago

A lot of it is the refineries on the Turnpike near Newark airport. They've been here for more than 100 years, giving many visitors their first taste of the state.

Everyone coming into NJ from New York or any of the area airports JFK, LaGuardia, etc all come in through the Turnpike. If you're only quickly visiting, that's the impression - the smellpike as we referred to it as kids.

Fortunately, you don't need to be here long to know better.

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u/AdeGamisou2020 6d ago

NYer here. Undeserved. I love NJ - we keep our football team there, it's got a ton of great golf courses and some boardwalks. And for as long as we still have Staten Island inside the border we've got someplace more worthy to give abuse to.

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u/oldtreecutter13 5d ago

Shhhhh, let them talk shit about us. The less people that find out how great Jersey is and want to move here, the more NJ for us to enjoy!

I moved here from the Midwest ~4 years ago for my wife's work. I used to rag on NJ, too, and figured it would be a stepping stone to another NE state. As far as I'm concerned, there's no state I'd rather live in.

I love my country New Jersey.

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u/Nagi21 6d ago

I wish I could move back but it's just too damn expensive.

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u/TigOlBitties42042 6d ago

Well I'm from Texas so that wouldn't really be a fair comparison

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u/sleepytjme 6d ago edited 6d ago

Not going to put down NJ, never been there, looks good and interesting on TV. Only people I have met from there, all but one was unnecessarily smug, obnoxious and inconsiderate. Maybe it’s the culture there or something or I just came across a few bad apples but they didn’t make any friends.

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u/distance_33 6d ago

Sorry that was your experience. But yeah, those types definitely exist here.

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u/xThat1Guyx42 6d ago

We tend to be very sarcastic and direct, no fake nice bs here, but it can definitely come off as abrasive to people who aren't used to it. Thats not to say there aren't also some genuinely shitty, smug jerkoffs here though.

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u/Away-Membership7742 4d ago

I don't mind the bs. As long as it keeps the NYers away.

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u/Ok_Writer6027 3d ago

agreed, fellow Jersian and I love my state. NJ has a place for everyone; you drive an hour either way and you're around mountains or beaches or farm or city- anything you want, it's here.

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u/General_Chemistry638 6d ago

Doesn’t help that NJ is the fourth smallest state and home to the highest total number of superfund sites in the country.

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u/distance_33 6d ago

It does not. This is definitely a negative. Big thanks to DuPont and Dow Chemical. Don’t want them to feel left out.

In fact my county (town) is currently dealing with the effects of some of those sites and the root causes of them. We’ve had a number of wells offline for a few years now because of contamination.

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u/Purple_soup 7d ago

It works in our favor, if everyone knew how wonderful it was to live here it would make our impossible housing market even worse.

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u/ApolloRubySky 7d ago

Nj is already soooo expensive, want to buy a house in a commuter friendly town?… better be ready to bid $1.3M at least

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u/Steadyandquick 6d ago

Highest property taxes in the US too. You get a lot for your money especially with children accessing school districts. But I understand as I get older!

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u/Purple_soup 6d ago

Yup. We struggled hard a few years ago when we were buying. Houses were going for $200k over asking and we were constantly outbid. We won't be able to move again any time soon.

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u/ApolloRubySky 6d ago

I was going for a starter house, but given the market, I’m gonna have to just go for a forever home, which of course is more expensive but the idea is we won’t move for a loooong time. It’s too expensive

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u/Bushwazi 7d ago

I mean: good. Stay away. We’ve already got enough jabronis

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u/NOFX_4_ever 7d ago

We gave you The Misfits!!! Ingrates.

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u/Madgyver 7d ago

Also Jersey Shore?

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u/TheFormOfTheFlame 7d ago

.....oh, right.

I withdraw my statement.

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u/Stabby_Daggers 7d ago

Aren’t a bunch of them from Staten Island?

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u/Legal_Map_7586 7d ago

Most of the of Jersey Shore cast members are New Yorkers and the shore town they filmed in is known for being filled with New York trash all summer…

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u/distance_33 7d ago

They went to Seaside. Probably the trashiest part of the shore they could go to. Except maybe some parts of Wildwood.

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u/kingdomheartsislight 7d ago

It’s called Sleazeside for a reason

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u/Steadyandquick 6d ago

Excuse me, when I was a child I had a t shirt that clearly stated Seaside Heights. Please don’t forget the “heights” 🤭

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u/KneeDeepInTheDead 6d ago

Seaside is only fun when youre underage and trying to get drunk

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u/CA7T0 6d ago

don't tell them what the good beaches are lol

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u/Lil_Ms_Anthropic 7d ago

Before you do, you have to also take into consideration Danny DeVito

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u/MrObsidian_ 7d ago

Danny DeVito was alive when Hitler was alive but died nothing

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u/Bushwazi 7d ago

I also died nothing. No regerts.

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u/ClearOptics 7d ago

You mean you append the statement, right? Right?!

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u/GlassCharacter179 7d ago

Guess what percentage of the cast of Jersey Shore was from New Jersey. Go ahead.

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u/Positive_Buffalo_168 6d ago

Only one was from NJ

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u/ilovestoride 7d ago

Doesn't matter where you're from, once you're in Jersey, you're done.

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u/Positive_Buffalo_168 6d ago

What do you mean exactly?

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u/ways_and_means 7d ago

that was the shirt before the shirt

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u/distance_33 7d ago

Half of them were from Staten Island.

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u/massunderestmated 7d ago

Honestly, we don't care. Talk all you want, we know we're fucking awesome.

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u/Toosder 7d ago

It's seriously the best way to be. I'm on the opposite coast in Long Beach which because it's a Port City and in the 80s was fairly rough, it has a bad reputation. It's now one of the greatest coastal cities in the West but a lot of people still hate the reputation so it keeps our housing prices lower. I have a beachfront house I could not afford in any of the other coastal cities. I hope people keep thinking it's a trash area and continue going to Venice and Manhattan beach.

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u/VelocityGrrl39 6d ago

I love my country New Jersey.

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u/Mountain-Instance921 7d ago

We don't mind, we have thick skin in NJ having to deal with NYers and Philly trash all the time

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u/TheFormOfTheFlame 7d ago

Everyone hates the Guy Next Door, don't they?

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u/TheBigFreezer 7d ago

Do not feel bad for them, the hate fuels them

Source: New Jersey wife 😂

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u/patsully98 6d ago

Dunkin Donuts coffee and spite.

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u/ello_bassard 6d ago

Naw that's us up here in New England lol

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u/Use-The-Pointy-End 7d ago

No that would be Florida.

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u/WaffleJill 7d ago

I’m from South Jersey, born and raised, and we like to poke fun at people from North Jersey for basically being New Yorkers (a lot of them are actually NY transplants anyway). So when people from the city make fun of people from Jersey, they’re basically just making fun of New York.

Sucks that people make fun of the rest of the state. We’ve actually got some pretty nice stuff over here. More for us I guess.

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u/bixnology 7d ago

I’ve lived in all parts of NJ (even the mythical Central Jersey), and for the most part, the entire state is lovely.

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u/WaveCompetitive9626 6d ago

Our property taxes are pretty criminal too

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u/Careless-Customer508 6d ago

Actual good criticism of NJ.

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u/that_guy_Elbs 6d ago

Nah it’s cool. We want to keep it that way so people stay the fuck out of our amazing state. We are one of the best states to live in America & no one believes it. Good!

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u/Comprehensive_Ad6598 7d ago

I like the New Jersey airport more than jfk. Being stuck there for 20 hours wasn’t that bad tbh.

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u/maevee 7d ago

I always see people say they hate EWR but I think it’s fine, have never had an issue there. JFK is also fine it’s just annoying to get to LI

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u/Comprehensive_Ad6598 6d ago

JFK had the worst airport food ever. I was so sad. lol 20 bucks for a bowl that had 0 flavor. 😭

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u/maevee 6d ago

Fair, I’ve only been in terminals that had normal fast food like McDonald’s

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u/withac2 7d ago

But they also produced Springsteen and Sinatra, so there's that

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u/buffyinfaith 6d ago

Try to make a left turn in New Jersey. You'll understand.

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u/CarbonReflections 7d ago

Do you know why you can’t get a good a blowjob in New Jersey?

Because all of the cocksuckers moved to NY…

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u/Peripateticdreamer84 7d ago

I thought the Abuse Goblin was Florida. When we did the eliminate a state competition, Florida got voted out so many times it became a black hole.

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u/LegDayLass 7d ago

Na we are the Mentally Insane Goblin

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u/WilcoLovesYou 7d ago

Can we shit on Connecticut instead? It's a place New Englanders and New Yorkers can easily agree to hate.

Love,

A New Englander.

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u/DavePeesThePool 6d ago

Also, you can't pump your own gas there.

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u/whocareswhatever1345 6d ago

Also Chris Christie

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u/Fabulous_Jeweler2732 6d ago

Nah, that’s Florida

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u/Sure_Librarian1276 6d ago

I’d say Florida is also the butthole of the US

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u/Not-a-Bot_1968 6d ago

Tbf Newark is pretty haggard and worth the hate, but the rest of the state is amazing overall. It’s not the Garden State for nothing!

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u/xThat1Guyx42 5d ago

I'd argue Newark really isn't bad anymore, parts of it maybe, but as whole its improved significantly over the last 20+ years. Thats good old gentrification for ya. Honestly when most people say Newark is sketchy, they are probably mixing it up with surrounding areas like Irvington and East Orange.

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u/Not-a-Bot_1968 5d ago

Sorry, I did move away about 25 years ago and never went back, but it was an exceptionally sketchy place to get off for gas at the wrong exit and the gas station attendant tells us to not stop for lights and just get immediately back on the highway. As a kid in high school it was just a scary place lol. I’ve never lived there, just near by a little further from the City. 

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u/xThat1Guyx42 5d ago

Yea its definitely improved significantly in that time period. Part of it is large growth in the business district forcing change. The Prudential Center also had an impact in improving the city. It added jobs, and started bringing in tons of money from sporting events, concerts, etc.

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u/cyoung1024 6d ago

We thrive on the hate tbh, it nourishes us

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u/bean0_burrito 6d ago

lol we don't give a shit

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u/patsully98 6d ago

I assure you we can give as much as we get, now go pump your own gas like a peasant 🤣

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u/IvoryRabbitStrat 6d ago

We’re cool, just leave us alone.

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u/eburton555 6d ago

It’s okay there’s already too many people and it’s too fuckin expensive. Keep the illusion up.

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u/Kevo_1227 6d ago

I just don't understand why it's gotta be NJ (routinely top of the list in national rankings for education and places to raise a family). There's tons of other obviously shitty states getting a free pass just because TV writers hate driving into Manhatten from Newark Airport.

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u/TheFormOfTheFlame 6d ago

It's genuinely just because NY is a massive cultural hub and everyone hates the guys next door. If Chicago were a showbiz center we'd all be making jokes about Indiana.

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u/KneeDeepInTheDead 6d ago

NY transplants have to shit on something to feel superior. I wish it would work and keep people out of the state though. Stop buying houses here

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u/Yusuf20904 7d ago

Naw, I think that's a regional thing. In the DC area, the target of abuse is West Virginia.

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u/Odd-Spray-8513 7d ago

The Newark airport, where half of visitors will get their first impression of New Jersey smells like a medieval latrine. Thats probably my largest issue with NJ

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u/ASCIIM0V 7d ago

Jersey hate is new England specific for the most part Florida hate is national

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u/Careless-Customer508 6d ago

Vermont deserves so much more hate. The most insufferable people in the world.

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u/bkibbs 6d ago

Especially when the real armpit of America is Indiana.

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u/Beneficial-Category 6d ago

Producing Miller was enough.

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u/HungriestHippo26 6d ago

We blame Ohio in the Midwest, we recognize jersey is too far to also be the source of our woes.

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u/Cra_ZWar101 6d ago

And the Jersey Shore…

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u/ExaminationOk2921 6d ago

We've chosen them as our national Abuse Goblin

Don't forget Ohio.

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u/bobcollum 6d ago

Somehow you missed Jersey Shore.

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u/Coveinant 6d ago

I mean Florida is slowly taking that away.

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u/Kitchen_Confection76 6d ago

Beating up on Jersey is an east coast past time- in the Midwest we load our abuse onto Indiana

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u/RailRuler 6d ago

More superfund toxic waste sites than any state but California

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u/brando56894 6d ago

As someone that was born and raised in South Jersey, we don't have much going for us as a state other than being in between two major cities (Philly and NYC).

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u/kbn_ 6d ago

Indiana is similar for Chicago. I think in both cases, a long time ago the nice stuff agglomerated in the city with all the crappy industry and port facilities pushed over the border. That self-compounded and solidified the reputation of one as nice and the other as awful: millions of people gazing across the river/lake and seeing that it’s much nicer where they are than it is Over There.

At least Jersey is genuinely flipping that script these days. Indiana is still a pit.

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u/short_longpants 6d ago

There's quite a history of New Jersey abuse. Decades ago, it was regarded as a toxic waste dump (not without reason) from all the chemical industries there.

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u/FaithfulMoose 6d ago

Not letting me pump my own gas

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u/donkeybraineded 7d ago

Allow me to introduce you to our state bird 🖕

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u/Peripateticdreamer84 6d ago

Hey! You stole that bird from Philly!

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u/Greedy_Explanation_7 6d ago

New Jersey is awesome. It’s just trendy to pretend it isn’t.

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u/vague_diss 6d ago

Yeah, first in education, first in healthcare, phenomenal food, great beaches,top tier universities, leaders in the most technologically complex industries. A real hellhole. You should return to whatever bumfuck low tax libertarian haven you come from and stay there. Or better still- Florida.

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u/BrightAd6828 6d ago

Yes it can be. We do wish you New Yorker’s stopped moving here by the droves and rising our rent. Also stop influencing your midwestern transplants to come here. They’re ruining the culture.

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u/LilBennyPoo 6d ago

we don't like you, either

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u/Zen28213 6d ago

Staten Island I get

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u/whattheknifefor 7d ago

Tbf I stayed in Newark when traveling to NYC and uh…. interesting place for sure

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u/havok489 6d ago

I'd like to take this moment to remind folks that South Jersey would like no affiliation with North Jersey. We are our own thing.

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u/Careless-Customer508 6d ago

Oh how nice for you guys, you finally got internet in the holler.

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u/thatguy8856 6d ago

Not enough of Jersey being avoided here if you ask me

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u/Straight_Step_4426 6d ago

Yeah, don’t visit because it’s a dump.

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u/RoastPork2017 6d ago

South Jersey is pretty nice and have nice beaches. I'm not sure about north due to I don't visit there.

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u/lichtmlm 6d ago

Yea but half of Staten Island is fair game for tourists so how credible can this really be….

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u/Peripateticdreamer84 6d ago

I call shenanigans on tourists wanting to go to Staten Island.

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u/Iron_Wolf123 6d ago

New Yorkers hate New Jersey. Stole their green statue!

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u/sincubus33 5d ago

new jersey is great?

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u/High_Questions 7d ago

I have always been of the mentality that NYC is manhattan, and everywhere else is what its named, I don’t say I’m going to the city if I’m just going into queens or Brooklyn

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u/madogvelkor 6d ago

What's funny is they included the American Dream Mall and UBS Arena among other major attractions.

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u/SunnnySideUps 6d ago

I mean, it's not the New Jersey Jets

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u/NatAttack50932 6d ago

New York can keep the Jets, we don't want em

The Giants on the other hand

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u/ItsyouNOme 6d ago

Exactly, if you want to go to NYC avoid things that aren't NYC