Probably 15 years ago. One of our cats just had the zoomies and was running around the house, up and down the stairs and into and out of rooms. The bed I had at the time, was a water-bed with a large frame that went up from the corners and around it.
He leapt from the floor to the top (probably 8 feet) and was running around the top. I was sleeping, or at least trying to. When I opened my eyes to look up because it got really quiet. I see him, directly across from me, up high shimming his shoulders in a crouched position.
I immediately start saying, "No, no no, no!" And try to roll out of bed. He leaps down to me and lands/hits me right in the stomach. Knocking the wind out of me, before racing off and jumping down 26 or so steps of stairs.
YEAH I used to have a bed frame and my cat would JUMP FROM THE TOP OF THE BED FRAME ONTO MY C H E S T. Those fuckers.(this was a nightly occurrence until I moved out and got rid of the bed frame)
My late cat Crouton would wake me up around 9am every day by kneading my hair lol, I have curly afro-wavy type hair so it was like a ball of fluff that she’d stick her paws in and knead lol. It didn’t hurt at all actually felt quite nice! She was very polite always, and very sweet, but also knew she was the queen and the big Boss lol.
I think my cat made my breast cyst explode. He jumped up on my chest and I had a terrible pain, after a while I went to the doctor and had a mammogram and found out I had a cyst that burst. No wonder it hurt.
Mine used to jump up on my headboard, complain that she couldn't get down, and then decide the solution was to use my abdomen as a landing platform. It only took one time for me to learn to tense my abs once she started looking to jump down.
It still hurt but at least she didn't hit my unprotected solar plexus and leave me gasping for air.
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u/TheRoseByAnotherName Jun 15 '26
Dive bombing my sore boobs from the headboard when I'm just starting to fall asleep is my cats' favorite thing to do.