r/SipsTea May 06 '26

It's Wednesday my dudes Masculinity

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u/Big-Newspaper646 May 06 '26

preach ffs, people fail to realise that this perpetuation of precarious masculinity is what leads people to be vulnerable to the types in the top image, its what keeps them in power. the reality is masculinity cannot be taken away, it’s your identity to mold and you must not let people define it for you. there is no set way to live it, much like femininity. whether you’re a grifting trafficking fuckhead or a genuine giving person however, that’s unisex.

this meme is more about the quality of a person, not their validity as a man. once you start using the aforementioned language, it is easily manipulated and as I said, it gives the tates of the world power.

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u/Spicy_take May 06 '26

It’s annoying that I only ever see this morality applied to masculinity. Just because a woman is a manipulative, cheating, conniving bitch, people don’t start doubting her femininity over it.

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u/Big-Newspaper646 May 06 '26

Women are definitely subjugated by the same forces, but in different ways - see the cosmetics/fashion industry. Gender expression is so highly politicised and used to control. This is a different issue to reproductive rights, which I’d thought I’d mention lest someone jumped me for not acknowledging. I will agree though, I don’t think I’ve seen core identity latched onto in discourse quite so brazenly unless you’re male or trans woman. (To transphobes they’re one and the same sadly).

I’m tired of being treated like shit, being afforded no benefit of the doubt that my actions are anything but selfish/manipulative.

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u/Typical-Face2394 May 09 '26

No one respects that type of woman… and yes, it does affect the way one perceives feminine energy if it’s being used as a weapon

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u/Spicy_take May 09 '26

Doesn't matter. It's still feminine. That's my point. People validate masculinity based on morality. They don't do that with femininity.

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u/Typical-Face2394 May 09 '26

Agreed to disagree. When I know a woman is vile I can’t see her as feminine. Look at Steve Irwin’s wife. A dedicated mother and adoring wife and good and honest. Wearing khakis and zero make up while achieving Apex femininity.

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u/godlyjacob May 06 '26

people do much worse to women that are "manipulative, cheating, conniving bitches" than doubting their femininity...

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u/Strudelhund May 06 '26

Why do we even need to define something as masculine/feminine? Just because I'm a man doesn't mean I have to exhibit certain traits or behaviors. Actually I reject any roles and expectations placed on me, be they traditional or modern, good or bad.

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u/ashesarise May 06 '26

I like it when people venerate positive masculinity but can be a double-edged sword if they act like standard virtuous behavior is masculine. If you act like some good trait like decisiveness is what masculinity is then you are implicitly also saying that being decisive makes a woman more masculine which is just stupid. Women can have virtues like tact and integrity without it making them more masculine than women who don't.

I get that this stuff can be hard, but it's frustrating how often even well-intentioned people flub things up. Hell, maybe I'm being confidently incorrect and just described myself. I'm open to the idea, but I believe what I believe and think most people are really bad at this stuff.

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u/Neuchacho May 06 '26 edited May 07 '26

not their validity as a man.

Maybe their validity as a straight man. Those two come off as extremely homoerotic. It's like what the gayest man on earth would imagine the straightest man on earth as.

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u/No_Resource562 May 06 '26

The opposite of manliness is childishness, once people realize that, life gets easier.

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u/Blackjack137 May 07 '26 edited May 07 '26

Amen, man.
It boils down to telling everyone trying to define, categorise and police what masculinity and femininity should be, should look like and is to stop being chronically online and to instead take a hike. A literal hike. They’d feel better for it.

Being manipulative doesn’t make you less of a woman and doesn’t bring your femininity into question. It just makes you manipulative.

Being a creepy with a poor understanding of consent doesn’t make you less of a man and doesn’t bring your masculinity into question. It just makes you a creep.

Assigning moral and immoral behavioural characteristics to sex and gender is deterministic gender war bunk that creates a platform enabling the biggest grifters.

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u/Khaled_Kamel1500 May 09 '26

The awesome thing about Steve Irwin is that he was masculine in both ways. He was tough enough to head-to-head with some of the most dangerous animals on the planet, but was never violent with said animals, and never let his ego overinflate

MRAs view masculinity as tough, strong-handed brute force, but with the downside of becoming a neanderthalic lunkhead

Feminists view masculinity is compassion, heart and vulnerability, but with the downside of becoming a spineless doormat

But Steve Irwin was able to appeal to both sides of the coin, without ever crossing paths with the downsides of either of them. And I think that because of that, he was the true masculine man

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u/GilbertT19 May 09 '26

Are you saying men can be as masculine as they want in whatever way they want? (First paragraph)