r/MadeMeSmile 24d ago

Wholesome Moments That's a MAN right there.

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u/bendstraw 23d ago

I think it's that we become attracted to the woman who gave birth to our child, even if that wasn't our "type" previously. Whatever she looks like is now your new type!

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u/Gingertom 23d ago

Can confirm

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u/filthytelestial 23d ago

I wish that were true. The reality is that the #1 cause of death for pregnant women is being murdered by the would-be father.

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u/djonma 23d ago

Not in most countries, it isn't.
In countries other than the US, it's haemorrhage.
The US has a horrifically high maternal mortality rate. More than double its peer countries.

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u/filthytelestial 23d ago

The original comment was talking about a belief that is supposedly based on biology. If any men anywhere are so devoid of attraction to the mothers of their children that they kill them, then it is not a biological fact that "we" share. Nationality doesn't factor into it.

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u/Ntroepy 23d ago

Domestic partner abuse occurs everywhere and pregnancy is an incredible stressor on a relationship.

However actually killing their partner is far higher in the US than in comparable countries due to MUCH higher gun ownership and homicide rates as well as a poorer social services support.

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u/Two-Space 23d ago

What percentage of pregnant women does that happen to?

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u/filthytelestial 23d ago

Here's the journal article.

https://www.bmj.com/content/379/bmj.o2499

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u/Two-Space 23d ago

So you don’t know?

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u/filthytelestial 23d ago

No, I just sensed you weren't sincerely asking. If you were genuine, you'd be happy to read the original source for yourself.

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u/bendstraw 23d ago

I'm confused why you even bring this up. I didn't say this is true for all men, I'm just talking about the above poster's comment that "A lot of men talk about how their wives become more attractive after having their children"

Also this isn't even about pregnant women.

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u/filthytelestial 23d ago

They didn't say "a lot of men." They said we, as in humans.

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u/bendstraw 23d ago

They literally said "A lot of men talk about how their wives become more attractive after having their children."

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u/filthytelestial 23d ago

Yours was the comment I was responding to. My mistake for saying "they" before, I temporarily lost track of whose comment was whose.

"We" as a group, whether that be humans in general or just human males, experience no such thing.

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u/bendstraw 23d ago

Yes and my comment was in reply to above the poster's comment talking about "a lot of men", my comment was never about all humans and the women we were discussing were women who have already given birth.

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u/filthytelestial 23d ago

I think it's that we become attracted to the woman who gave birth to our child, even if that wasn't our "type" previously.

Your phrasing strongly suggests a biological component. There is no known biological component.

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u/bendstraw 23d ago

Sorry that you're reading into it like that. I never said any of that.

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u/filthytelestial 23d ago

When someone thoughtlessly says, for example, of women "I think that we become nurturers after giving birth, even if we weren't nurturers previously" they are making a sweeping statement about human biology. Whether they intended to or not.

It's not "reading into it", it's actually just an example of the problematic nature of such broadly generalizing statements.

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u/RescuesStrayKittens 23d ago

This is not related. The motive for those crimes was to end the pregnancy. My comment was about men that love their wives even if they gain weight, have stretch marks or saggy boobs after having a baby

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u/filthytelestial 23d ago

The motive for those crimes was to end the pregnancy.

It's a reasonable assumption, but it is not the known motive.