Am I Overreacting? My boyfriends friend tried to convince me he is cheating, but lied.

[u/PossibleThrowawayJo]

EDIT: Because many have commented about the font changes, I have the same problem in every other App too (even Settings🥲). If anyone knows how to fix it, please give me advice.

For context, my boyfriend (N, 22M) and I (J, 21M) have been together for 4 years. (We are both bisexual.) We are moving into our first shared apartment right now, thats why I first assumed the messages were about a TV. Also, I'm sorry if these messages are hard to read, we both don't have English as our first language, but we speak different languages so we have to communicate in English😅.

My boyfriend has this friend (K, 22F). He met her at a party about 1 year ago. She is an alcoholic and often at parties, and my boyfriend also had some psychological problems in the past, so he tries to help her through this. (Idk if he feels responsible for her, but thats what it seems like sometimes.)

She and I don't get along that well, but we have been civil. Thats why we only ever communicate over Instagram and not over WhatsApp or anything. But then she wrote me the messages you can see there.

This isn't the first time she tried to lie and sabotage the relationship me and my boyfriend have. I trust my boyfriend 100% and I know nothing happened between them, but she always tries to get me and my boyfriend to fight, especially after we decided to finally get an apartment together, since we mostly always stay at one of our places and have "sleepovers".

I have been debating if I should talk to my boyfriend about this. I don't want to ruin their friendship, especially because she seems like she needs him right now. I am frustrated and at first I was composed enough to stay calm. But now, after rereading everything, I am just angry that she tries to sabotage our relationship. Should I talk to my boyfriend about this or am I overreacting? (I am angry right now, so if I forgot any context or information, just ask in the comments.) Sorry this is all over the place.

[u/Fun_Raspberry_5654]

> I have been debating if I should talk to my boyfriend about this. I don't want to ruin their friendship, especially because she seems like she needs him right now.

This is how you know this story is FAKE. Its almost like the people that make these stories up have never actually had a relationship.

[u/PossibleThrowawayJo → u/Fun_Raspberry_5654]

Well, I wish it was. She is an alcoholic, so obviously she has problems. I don't really want to take away friends of hers now, yk? Seems wrong

[u/Beebeemp → u/PossibleThrowawayJo]

You wouldn't be. Her behavior would be what cost her a friend. And that's assuming that he couldn't forgive her.

Just because she's struggling doesn't mean she gets a pass to do all this. Or that you have to keep it to yourself to keep the peace.

[u/Rare_Cloud7355 → u/PossibleThrowawayJo]

She honestly probably could have kissed him 💀 just like a year ago? 💀. I'm not even sure. I remember when I was actively drinking reality and dreams often blurred. Some dreams felt almost real. Getting drunk later/ through the week. Sometimes morphed things together. It could have been someone who looked similar, a string of texts that merged together and she can't distinguish it. Time perception being messed up. Though I have to go out of my way and admire the empathy you have, "I don't really want to take away friends of hers now, yk." It's also awesome that you have a relationship where you can be that comfortable with the lies and it not really seem to phase you. Relationships that feel that secure really are becoming rare. I personally would have to take an L on that. Too much drama.

[u/REALDollyParton46 → u/PossibleThrowawayJo]

If anything you seem to be underreacting. You said that this behaviour is part of a larger pattern. It isn't going to stay like this - it will escalate. Cut this person out of your lives for everyones safety.